Volatile Obsessions

by Dee Garcia

  She’s not the only one.

  “You mean, kind of like us?” I pointed out, earning me a dubious smirk, one I didn’t return.

  “I think we’re more alike than you think.”

  “We used to be,” I stressed. “I’m not sure the sentiment still applies.”

  “Please,” he huffed. “Here we are again, working to together, trying to take over the world.”

  “For your benefit.”

  “And yours. I promised you half.” He sounded offended, but I pulled a page from his book and shrugged it off as well.

  “Wasn’t sure that still stood when I was just reprimanded for getting us ahead.”

  Vic sighed and ran a hand over his faded head, shaking his head in what I sensed was defeat. “Apologies, okay? Just truly took me off-guard. But yes, it still stands.”

  “Then stop bitching and let me do my job like you asked,” I advised.

  Hands in the air, he smiled. “Warn a bloke is all I’m saying.”

  “Will do, now get the fuck out.”

  All was well about an hour later.

  That ridiculous conversation with Vic was a thing of the past and I was feeling fantastic, higher than a damn kite. The weed had done its job and there was not one thing in this world that could’ve bothered me in that moment.

  Breathing in the fresh air, I stood huddled over the thick glass ledge, enjoying the view from the very top of the Panorama, one of the highest sky rises in Miami. Down below, the typical sounds of the city erupted in waves, briefly transporting me back to my time in New York. I’d chosen this building as my spot for that exact reason. The city just called to me, soothed me. It was home in its own insane, chaotic way.

  “Roman-fucking-King!” a woman’s voice shrilled, jolting me in place.

  That voice. It can’t be.

  In a brisk swivel, I was met with her approaching form as she sashayed toward me with purpose, hips swinging side to side in these tight leather pants that clung to her legs.

  My jaw almost hit the floor.

  “How in the…” I couldn’t even finish my sentence as I stared at her in confusion.

  “How in the hell did I find you?” she finished amusedly, an irate little laugh bubbling in tow. “An anonymous tip off.”

  Anonymous my dick.

  It had to be Vic.

  He’s the only one who knew I always had an escape spot.

  “You need to go,” I warned her.

  “I think not. I have a huge bone to pick with you.”

  “I’m sure you do, but you’re not doing it here.”

  “Like hell I’m not,” she spat, stopping toe to toe with me. Blue eyes lifted to my icy stare. “You must really have a death wish after that special delivery. Is it not more simple for you to just leave?”

  A small gust of wind rolled by then, slamming me with her scent every which way possible. It seeped into my pores, knocked me off my game for a split-second. Breathing in only made it worse.

  “It is, but I told you, Lux. You have what I want and I’m not leaving until I get it,” I grated out, trying my damnedest not to focus on the fact she was right there. “Besides, you know deep down you don’t want me to leave.”

  Her face contorted in disgust. “Oh, please. Don’t think so highly of yourself.”

  “I’m not. Simply calling it like it is. You wouldn’t have acted out in my silence if you didn’t.”

  “L-O-L. Right.” She laughed. “Guess you got me all figured out then, huh?”

  Shaking my head, I moved impossibly closer, dropping my lips to her ear. “Not yet, but I will eventually. I know enough, though.”

  Lux scoffed and pushed me away, but not before I felt her shiver in delight. “Get over yourself, Roman, seriously. You don’t know shit about me! I hit you a second time to send the message loud and clear.”

  “And that would be?” I questioned, stepping closer once more.

  “Don’t. Fuck with me,” she threatened, shoving me backwards so hard my back hit the glass ledge.

  All the noises down below—car horns, music, laughter—suddenly seemed louder than before, rattling up my spine, and despite being cornered, a smirk played on my lips. “As I demonstrated today, I could do a lot more than just fuck with you, pigeon.”

  Those bright blue eyes bulged. “Piss off, got it? Just quit while you’re ahead. The distillery was nothing in comparison to the hell I could bring you, to the hell I will bring you after your little stunt today.”

  “So bring it then. Let’s see what you can do, love,” I cooed, waving my palms challengingly.

  Smoke seemed to billow from her nose as she bound up to me and prodded my chest with one of her perfectly polished claws.

  “You really wanna go there?”

  “I wanna go everywhere; all over it, in it, behind it,” I admitted, my gaze skating over her petit figure.

  “You’re delusional,” she barked, and all I could do was shrug.

  I’d been called a hell of a lot worse.

  “Maybe, but I like to think of it as more of a wild imagination with a penchant for danger.”

  “You’re digging yourself a grave, King,” she gritted out.

  “As are you, love. The more you push, the more I pull. I could make it so easy for you, you know? Just give me what I want and I’ll be out of your hair. No one else has to get hurt,” I explained, bringing a hand up to finger those curled emerald locks.

  Lux eyed me fiendishly, her chest heaving wildly beneath the lace cage of her halter top. The small swells of her tits, adorned with roses and a striking raven, all but called to me, begging me to set them free and worship them with my mouth. I was so far gone within my own imagination, I didn’t notice her whipping out a weapon until the tip of the blade pressed against my skin.

  “Or I could just shove this right into your jugular and make you go away,” she sneered.

  “Do it.” I grinned devilishly, heart racing with adrenaline. “I dare you.”

  A growl tore free from her chest as she moved closer, eyebrows bunched together. She held my stare as firmly as ever, but made no move to see her threat through.

  I held steady, waiting, and waiting, and waiting, counting down the seconds…

  But it never came.

  That’s when I struck.

  Snatching the blade from her hand, I flung her into the ledge I’d been trapped against, and pressed my body against her soft planes, caging her beneath me.

  “See what happens when you hesitate?” I growled, bringing the blade to her erratic pulse. “You get yourself into trouble.”

  “I’ll scream,” she announced, holding her chin high.

  “Oh, I know. They all scream. Yes, Rome, harder, please!”

  A quiet gasp met my ears, but she recovered quickly, narrowing her eyes. “You know that’s not what I’m talking about…”

  “Well aware, pigeon.” I chuckled. “What can I say? I just like pressing your buttons.”

  “Is there a button I can press that’ll make you fuck off?”

  Ever so lightly, I dragged the blade across her throat to the other side. “Now why would I ever do that when we’re just really getting started?”

  “Because I’m ready to finish it!” she barked, swatting my hand away deftly. With it went her weapon tumbling to the floor. “Clearly, you must seem to think I’m joking. I don’t know why, honestly. I will make your life a living hell.”

  “My life’s already hell, love. I can handle the heat.”

  Lux groaned, the sound loud and adorably frustrated. Once again, she tried shoving me away, but I was strong as iron, an impenetrable force with the grin of a Cheshire Cat.

  “You’re fucking impossible, you know that?!” she seethed. “You talk all this crap out of your ass about negotiations and what not, but all you’ve done is harass me.”

  “Because you don’t listen.”

  “Because I don’t listen? Jesus-fucking-Christ—who the hell do you think you are?!”

>   “Roman-fucking-King, sweetheart,” I reminded her, which only riled her up all the more.

  “I hate you!” She shoved at me again.

  “Scream it louder for me, Lux. You what?”

  “I hate you—shove—I fucking hate you!”

  “Excellent,” I whispered, slithering a hand around her throat. My grip was so tight, I felt the bob of her swallow. “Hold on to that feeling tight, pigeon. Hold onto it real fucking tight, ‘cause if you let it go, I swear I’ll wear you down to the bone, and I promise you that you’ll regret it.”

  ♫ Gangsta - Kehlani ♫

  I was shaking in my seat the entire drive home, my hands white-knuckling the steering wheel from the strain of my hold. I wasn’t just angry—I was beside myself.

  With myself.

  With him.

  Once again, this man proved he had the ability to diverge a dozen different emotions through my body in one go, and I couldn’t wrap my head around it in the slightest.

  How?

  How was this bloody possible?

  I kept telling myself I hated him, kept telling him I hated him, but the second he was anywhere near me, I lit up from the inside out, forgot all about what a trying pest he’d been since stepping foot in Miami.

  And the more it happened, the harder it was to continue denying there an obvious attraction burning between us.

  An attraction I wished didn’t exist.

  Running him out of my city would be a million times easier if I didn’t feel so…

  I shook my head.

  No, I’m not going there…

  Go on, say it, pressed that little voice in my head. If you didn’t feel so…

  “Intimidated,” I whispered, slamming my foot on the brake at a red light.

  That singular yet loaded word shot a horrified gasp out of my mouth. My head started spinning. Panic clawed its way deep into my being, wiping out every last bit of denial clouding my judgment.

  No. NO. This can’t be happening.

  Hands shaking, I reached for my iPhone lodged in the cupholder and quickly opened up my group thread with Suki and Ramsey.

  Me: 911

  Their replies were nearly instantaneous and came in within seconds of each other.

  Suki: I’m here! What happened?

  Ramsey: What the hell happened? Are you okay?!

  I was about to punch in my response when several cars behind me honked angrily, snapping my gaze up to see, not only the now green light, but other drivers zooming past me on my left.

  “Shit!” I hissed, dropping my phone into my lap as I stepped on the gas, gunning it through the intersection. Palm tress, street lights, and buildings alike were nothing but one big blur.

  This can’t be happening. This can’t be fucking happening.

  Oh, but it is, went that little voice again. And no, you’re not over-thinking it.

  More pings sounded off between my legs, reminding me I hadn’t replied to my girls after calling for help, something I hadn’t dared to do after what happened with Vic. If I told them, Suki would’ve snapped like a damn twig and gone on a rampage with Ramsey closely on her tail. They would’ve ripped him apart piece by piece, fed him to the wolves.

  Yes, he deserved it, worse than that if I’m being honest with myself, but I wouldn’t fare well without them if they ended up in prison on my behalf.

  Some things were just better left unsaid.

  Approaching another red light, I slowed to a stop and scooped my phone up with a quickness, their frantic messages clogging the notifications on my screen.

  Ramsey: Lux, what the hell is going on?

  Ramsey: Helllloooo?

  Suki: I’m gonna kill you myself if you don’t answer! You can’t text us with an emergency and then disappear!

  Suki: LUX!!! GET YOUR ASS BACK IN THIS CHAT!!!

  Ramsey: Jesus fucking Christ! What the hell, Lux!

  Ramsey: Suk, I’m starting to worry for real…

  Suki: I know…

  As worried as they were, my little black heart swelled as I read their messages. They loved me, and I them, hence why dragging them into dark places with me was a strict no go. I couldn’t lose them.

  They were all I had.

  Me: I’m here! I was driving dammit!

  I giggled almost right after I sent it, imagining the both of them sagging in relief. Suki was probably cussing me out, too.

  Suki: What in the hell happened?

  Me: Him.

  Ramsey: Who?

  Suki: R-O-M-A-N.

  Ramsey: Ooooh! Spill! What did he do now?

  Me: Both of you free?

  Ramsey: Sure am.

  Suki: Just closing up!

  Me: My place, half hour! Green light—gotta go!

  “My question to you is, do you still want to put a bullet through his head or not?” That was Suki, curled in the corner of my couch with wine glass in hand.

  We were twenty minutes into the Roman conversation and I was about done. Not because of opposing views or anything like that, I just didn’t want to talk about him anymore. They were having too much fun with this, and well, I wasn’t.

  “I should, especially after today,” I admitted, taking a sip from my own glass. “But I don’t.”

  “Why?” she hedged, and all I could offer was a feeble shrug.

  “I don’t know. When he just Phantom, the thought was a no brainer...”

  “But the second you met him…” Ramsey chimed in from her place on the tiled floor. “It disappeared?”

  I nodded.

  It was the complete and awful truth.

  When Roman was just Phantom, hating him was simple, a given based on how he’d attacked me and what he’d done to my business.

  But then I stormed into his office, and everything changed in a nanosecond.

  I’d been trying to keep myself in check, had been relentlessly reminding myself of all he’d done no matter how petty, but in the end, it only proved one thing.

  Denial was real, and I was drowning in it.

  “So are you finally admitting that you want him?” asked an amused Suki.

  I wasn’t even looking at her and I knew there was a smirk sitting her face.

  More like painted. Permanently.

  “I don’t want him,” I said surely, or at least what I thought was surely. “But I will admit to his looks affecting me more than they should.”

  “Better known as, you want him,” Suki snickered, prompting Ramsey to choke back a laugh as she took a sip from her glass.

  “I don’t wa—” I started to protest, but Suki was quick to cut me off.

  “L, want him or not, you admit he’s attractive, yes?”

  Nod.

  “You also admit that attraction not only complicates things, but isn’t a one-sided affair, right?”

  Another nod. “Feeds off of it any and every chance he gets.”

  “And you don’t want to kill him?” she clarified.

  “Or rather, she can’t kill him,” Ramsey corrected.

  “Right, what she said,” Suki agreed.

  Once again, I nodded, stare trained on the tinted wine in my glass.

  “I can’t,” I said quietly, swirling the liquid round and around and around. “He dared me to hurt him tonight, literally dared me as I held the blade to his neck… But I hesitated and he turned it on me, trapped me beneath his hard body. It’s like, all he has to do is come within one foot of me and my body locks up, my brain shuts down. He intimidates me in that respect, and I keep telling myself I don’t like it but—”

  “For the record, you do want him,” she cut me off, holding a hand up when I attempted to protest again, “but I’m not pushing the topic. We’ll talk about that when you’re ready. My question now is, do you love your job enough to continue fighting him for it? He’s obviously not going to disappear any time soon, so why not just give him what he wants and send him on his way?”

  My entire body jerked backwards, eyes bulging in outrage at her sugg
estion. “Are you insane? There’s no way in hell I’m handing over Miami just because he won’t piss off. If he wants to continue this incessant game of tag, then so be it, I’m not giving him shit other than hell. All I want is for him to go away.”

  “But why, L? He’s already making it impossible for you to do your job. Why not just let him have what he wants and focus on Black Widow instead? Hell, I know you prefer not to, but I could really use your help over at Vybe, too,” she explained. “Ram, what do you think?”

  Ramsey sat up straighter and crossed her pale legs, criss cross applesauce style. “I don’t think she should just hand Miami over on a silver platter. It’s hers, rightfully so, but do I think she should give him a cut? Yes.”

  My already bulging eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as I stared at my best friends in disbelief. “You’re both off your rockers,” I muttered, scrubbing a hand down my face.

  “I’m just saying, L. Clearly, he’s feeling exactly what you’re feeling. You said it yourself, he feeds off it. Says and does things based off that feeling. Sounds to me like fighting it useless, so why not team up with him?”

  “Team up with him?” I laughed cynically. “Who do you think we are? Bonnie and Clyde?”

  “Bonnie and Clyde, Harley and Joker, Thanos and Lady Death,” she clarified, waving a hand. “I’m just saying, he’s into you, and whether you agree or not, you’re into him. Why not take advantage of that?”

  They’ve lost their bloody minds.

  “No. Just no,” I asserted.

  “Then you’re going to have to work him out of your system and get him out of here before things escalate more than they already have,” Suki piped up again.

  “How am I supposed to do that? It’s hard enough as it is.”

  “Which is why we’re both telling you to give him something, but you don’t want to,” Ramsey countered.

  “You’re damn right I don’t,” I huffed, crossing my arms. “I worked too hard for him to—”

  “Then shut him out, L. Shut him out of your mind and keep it moving. You’re going to have to think smarter when it comes to scaring him off,” Suki advised, rising off the couch.