“I’ll let you know when he’s up,” I lied. I folded my arms. Was she really going to make me say it? I had the power here. After all, I was family and she wasn’t.
Thankfully, she took the hint and nodded as she shouldered her purse. “Sorry. You’re right. You should have some time with your dad.” She tucked a curl behind her ear. “I’ll have my uncle tow your dad’s car here so you have something to drive. His keys are most likely in his belongings.” She nodded toward the closet on my right.
“Sounds good,” I said. I really needed her to leave before I broke down. I didn’t want to give her another reason to stick around.
She sighed and then took a few steps toward the door. “Don’t hesitate to call me if you need anything.”
I hated how nice she was being to me. It made disliking her that much harder. “Yep,” I said, emphasizing the p.
She took one last look around then walked out into the hall, shutting the door behind her.
Now alone, I let my gaze sweep the room and, every so often, I let it linger on Dad’s face. Regret and anger built up in my chest as I studied him. Why was I such a terrible daughter? I was ridiculous if I thought it was okay to run around with a boy behind Dad’s back.
He deserved better than that. He’d always protected me. Why was this any different?
Exhaustion overtook me, so I brought up my foot and rested it on my seat. I used my knee as a tool to prop my head up, I relaxed and let my eyes close.
“Tiny?”
I bolted up from where I had hunched over. I winced as the crick in my neck tightened. “Dad?” I asked.
He was sitting up in his bed with a tired expression. When I met his gaze, his eyes widened. “How did you get here?”
I rubbed the knot in my shoulders with one hand while I dragged the chair closer to him with the other. “Ms. Swallow brought me.”
He glanced around the room. “Angelica? Where is she?”
A bit of jealousy crept up into my chest. Why did he care where she was? Hadn’t he told me that relationships were dumb? We were better off without them. “She said she had things to take care of,” I said flatly.
I tried to ignore the hurt expression that flashed over his face. “Oh,” he said.
Add that to the list of things that made me a horrible daughter. I knew that Dad was completely smitten by Ms. Swallow, and yet, here I was, trying to push them apart. Then I shook that thought away. I was helping Dad. After all, wasn’t that what he’d been doing for me all along?
“But I’m here.” I gave him a hopeful smile. That seemed to appease him, and he returned it with a smile of his own.
“That makes me so happy,” he said, reaching out to grasp my hand.
I held his hand, and before I could stop myself, the words “I’m sorry” tumbled from my lips.
He shook his head. “No, I’m sorry. I should have never let something like that get in the way of our relationship. You didn’t know that boys would be at that party, and you’ve never broken my rules before. I should have trusted you.” He steadied his expression. “I trust you, Destiny.”
Wow. He went full name and everything. He only did that when he was serious.
I swallowed, trying to ignore the lump in my throat. He trusted me. He thought that I would never lie to him. Ugh, I was a terrible daughter.
But the truth was, I wasn’t ever going to lie to him again. I just wasn’t ready to tell him that I had lied in the past. Or that I’d snuck around with Tyson, one of the guys he forbade me to even look at. And I was definitely not going to tell him that I just might have fallen in love with Tyson.
Love.
Just saying that word in my mind caused my already hemorrhaging heart to squeeze. Why did I even think that word? It would be easier to get over Tyson if it was just a dumb crush. But if I loved him?
I halted that thought. Nope. I wasn’t going to dwell on that. If I had any chance at getting over him, I had to stop thinking about our time together. Or how he made me feel.
I inwardly groaned. I needed to talk about something else.
“So, what are we going to do once we break you out of here?” I asked, grabbing a nearby pillow and hugging it in my lap.
“Well, I was telling Angelica about the cabin we used to rent up on Lake George. Remember that?”
Anger settled in my gut. “Ms. Swallow? Really, Dad?”
He glanced over at me. “What? Don’t you like her?”
“She’s nice, I guess. For a teacher.” I raised my eyebrows, hoping he’d get the hint.
He didn’t. He looked as oblivious as ever. “And?”
“I guess I just can’t believe that you want to let this stranger enter our lives like this. I mean, come on, haven’t you told me that relationships are doomed from the start? That all they do is end with you brokenhearted? To avoid them like you would the plague?” My voice began to rise as agitation boiled up inside of me.
His eyes widened. “I said those things?”
He’s in a hospital bed, Destiny. Cut him some slack.
I let out my breath slowly and settled back into my chair. I didn’t have to get all worked up. I just needed to remind him why he hated relationships. I needed to bring up Mom.
“I just figured that since Mom pretty much ripped your heart out and abandoned me, she’d ruined you from wanting a relationship ever again.” I picked at the fraying cuff of my sleeve, trying to act like I didn’t care what his response would be.
He was quiet before he let out his breath. It sounded like he was getting ready to tell a long story and needed to prime his lungs. “Well, if that’s what you think of me, then I’ve failed you.”
I stared at him. “What?”
“You mother hurt me, yes. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t ever want a relationship again. And I most certainly want you to find a guy and marry him.”
My eyes bugged.
“Some day way in the future.” He winced as he raised his arm, waving his hand.
“Really? ‘Cause I did not get that from the last few years of my life. I thought you hated everything about marriage and dating.” I folded my arms. Nothing like finding out your dad wanted love for himself, even though he forbade it for you.
He sighed and reached up to gingerly rub his temple. “Can we talk about this another time? I’m tired.”
I nodded. “Yeah. Sure.”
He lay back onto his bed and closed his eyes. Five minutes later, he was snoring.
I pulled out my phone only to find that I had a message from Tyson. My heart took off galloping. Part of me wished so bad that he had texted to tell me he was an idiot, that we should be together no matter what. Actually, not part of me—all of me wished for that.
But I couldn’t stand another heartbreaking statement from him. So I deleted the message. I really didn’t want to hear from him ever again.
After ten minutes of sitting in Dad’s room with nothing to do, I got up and wandered out to the hall. After asking a nearby nurse where the cafeteria was, I followed her directions and got in line to order.
It felt good to do something mind numbing. Something that I didn’t really need to think about. Because if there was one thing I was sure of, it was that I needed to stop thinking for the day. Or maybe the month.
Chapter Eighteen
I spent the weekend with Dad at the hospital. It was better than being at home, where I was alone. The nurses were funny, and after a good night’s sleep, Dad was more awake and aware of his surroundings. We laughed and played some hospital-provided boardgames.
It was interesting. Most of them had missing pieces, so we had to improvise.
We kept our conversation light and fluffy. Apparently, Dad had picked up on the fact that Ms. Swallow and relationship had become trigger words for me, so he stayed clear of both.
If she-that-shall-not-be-named called, Dad didn’t tell me.
She did, however, text me once to let me know that Dad’s car was parked in the lot behind the
hospital and how to find it.
So when I walked into Chemistry on Monday morning, I really wasn’t sure what to expect. Was she going to be nice to me? Mean?
Thankfully, the entire school had heard what had happened to Coach Davis, so I was peppered with condolences and questions about his recovery. It helped take my mind off the impending doom I was going to experience in Chem. Where Ms. Swallow and Tyson were.
I glanced to my table to see Tyson sitting at it. His gaze was focused on his textbook in front of him. I snorted. He’d finally decided to give a crap about his grade—now that I wasn’t going to be around to hold his hand.
I still wanted to be there for him. But just seeing the way his shaggy hair fell across his forehead, or the way he furrowed his brow as he read, was enough to cause my heart to pick up speed and tears to brim my lids.
I couldn’t do this. I had to get out of here.
Turning on my heel, I ran smack-dab into Ms. Swallow. Her eyes widened as she took in my expression.
“Are you okay, Destiny?” she asked, grabbing my elbow and pulling me out into the hall as the final bell rang.
I nodded, chewing my lip. There was no way I could spill to her what had happened over the weekend. I couldn’t tell her that I’d fallen for the quarterback—Dad’s sworn enemy. She’d run off and tell him in a heartbeat. Get Dad to stop trusting me so that she could swoop in and take my place.
“Is it your dad, honey? Are you worried about him?” She reached out and rested her hand on my arm. “Because I talked to him this morning, and they are going to release him tomorrow evening. I’m picking him up.”
My frustration turned to rage as her words sank in. “You’re what?” I asked. I was shouting now, but I didn’t care.
Dad hadn’t changed. Even after our conversation, where I’d basically told him that I didn’t want him dating Ms. Swallow, he’d gone ahead, behind my back, and talked to her.
Ms. Swallow raised her eyebrows. “I’m sorry. I thought he told you.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Don’t you think you’ve done enough? If it hadn’t been for you, Dad would have never been in that crosswalk.” I pointed my finger at her chest. “This is all your fault, and I want you to stay away from me and my dad.” My voice was shaking as hard as my hand was. I hadn’t felt this betrayed and hurt since Mom had pulled out of the driveway with Pedro in the front seat.
Ms. Swallow hesitated. I could see she had words lingering on the tip of her tongue, but then she nodded. “You’re right. I never took into consideration what this might do to you, Destiny. I decided to never date a student’s parent, and I guess I just rationalized it away saying he was more another teacher than a parent.” She sighed. “I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.”
I scoffed, shocked that she was being so nice about this. It was making it hard not to hate her. She was genuine and cared. That was a lot more than I’d gotten from any other woman in my life.
“Thanks,” I said, my voice softening. Actually, my whole body was relaxing, making me feel light-headed. I leaned against the lockers for support. It was as if the realization of what had happened this weekend came crashing down around me, and my body was reacting from the weight.
“Destiny, are you going to be okay?” she asked, reaching out to touch my arm.
I nodded. “Yeah. I’m just really overwhelmed.”
“Maybe you should go home.”
“No,” I blurted out. That was the last place I wanted to be. “No, I’m okay. I—I just was wondering if I could swap lab partners. Tyson and I…” I eyed her, sizing her up. Could I trust her? I pushed the doubt from my mind. She’d already kept my previous secrets, there was no reason for her to spill anything to Dad now. “We had a falling out, and I think with what happened this weekend with my dad, I’m just not up to being around him right now.”
“Of course. I’ll switch you and Betsy.”
Relief flooded my chest as I pushed off the lockers and followed her into her classroom. The noise dropped off to whispers as we entered. I could feel Tyson’s gaze on me, but I kept my eyes trained to the floor while Ms. Swallow called Betsy up to the front and explained to her what was happening.
After Betsy agreed and gathered her things, I made my way over to her lab table and sat down next to Sam, my new partner. Thankfully, I was behind Tyson, so I didn’t have to worry about him staring at me. It felt oddly comforting, being in control like this.
The rest of class, I only let my gaze linger on the back of his head five times. I kept count in my head. One of those times, he glanced behind him and met my gaze—which I dropped instantly.
By the time the bell rang, I was exhausted and ready to get out of there. I didn’t wait around for anyone—I was the first person out the door. But as soon as I got out into the hall, I was stopped by a few football players who wanted a Boss update. I explained to them what had happened and that he was expected to come back to school by the end of the week.
They nodded and patted my back, pushing me forward a few inches, as they passed by me. I swallowed and glanced toward Ms. Swallow’s room. Had Tyson left yet?
I put my head down and headed to English. I needed to stop thinking about him right now if I was going to survive the rest of the year. Tyson and I were done. Finished.
When I got to the lunchroom, I’d successfully pushed him from my mind. Instead of thinking about the way his eyes lit up when he talked about Cori or the way he stared at me in an open and unabashed way, I’d resorted to singing ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall.
Just as I got to ninety, a familiar hand grabbed my elbow, and I was pulled into the supply closet.
I didn’t have to turn around to know that Tyson would be standing behind me. But when I did, my heart leapt into my throat. His expression was one of concern with his lips downturned. When I met his gaze, he ran his hand through his hair.
“What do you want, Tyson?” I asked, forcing my voice to come out strong.
He glanced at me and then to the floor. “I—um—” I watched his shoulders rise as he took a deep breath. He wasn’t even sure why he’d pulled me in here.
“I’m fine. If you wanted to make sure you didn’t break this naive girl’s heart, let me put your worry at ease. I’m just fine.”
Stop saying fine, Destiny. He’ll know you’re most certainly not fine.
But I couldn’t let him know that he was breaking my heart, that being in this room—breathing the same air as him—was killing me. Slowly and painfully.
“How’s your dad?” he finally asked, glancing up at me.
He was hurting. It was written all over his face. He was in pain, and that realization gripped my chest and squeezed until I could barely breathe. “He’s fine,” I whispered. I wasn’t going to let him win. I would be the stronger person. After all, he had dumped me.
He nodded and then slowed. “And you?”
Hadn’t we already covered this? I’d told him about fifty times that I was fine. But I doubted he was even listening. He was too preoccupied with whatever he wasn’t saying.
“Listen, if you’re feeling guilty about what happened on Saturday, don’t. It was good, what you said, and ending this”—I waved between his chest and my own—“whatever it is, was smart. I’d promised my dad that I wasn’t going to date, and I was an idiot to think that lying to him so that I could be with you was a good idea. If something really bad had happened to my dad while we were together, I would have never been able to forgive myself.”
I forced a smile. It felt more like a jack-o-lantern grin than anything.
A wave of sadness passed over Tyson’s face. I tried not to let that sway my resolve.
Standing in this room with him one more minute just might kill me. Just being around him was breaking my resolve. I stepped past him, toward the door.
He reached out, grabbing my arm before I could leave. I was only inches from him. My breath caught in my throat as I hesitated. I knew, in a moment, I was going to have to look
up at him. To have a front-row seat to his pain.
“It’s okay,” I whispered, raising my gaze to meet his.
Tyson swallowed hard and then glanced over at me. “I’m so sorry,” he said.
I nodded. “I know.”
We stood there in silence. I swore I could hear the beating of our hearts. I would have given anything to be able to tell him that I loved him. That I didn’t want to walk away. But I couldn’t. It wasn’t fair to him, and it was most certainly not fair to me.
I patted his hand then opened the door and left. As I walked down the hall toward English, I tried hard to fight back the tears. I guess one nice thing about having Dad in the hospital was that most people who saw me blubbering would assume it was because of him and not Tyson.
I walked into English and realized that I couldn’t do this. Two nights of sleeping propped up on the chair in Dad’s room plus the emotional baggage I was carrying around had taken its toll on me. All I wanted to do was crawl onto one of those leather cots in the nurse’s room and take a nap.
So that was what I did. Mr. Jones didn’t have a problem letting me go. It was probably because I looked like I was on the brink of breaking down. And as soon as I walked into the office, all the students got out of my way as I walked past them and into the nurse’s room.
I headed straight over to the first cot, and I curled up on it. I closed my eyes as Mrs. Tate took my temperature and blood pressure and then told me to rest. I nodded and closed my eyes, letting sleep take over me.
Chapter Nineteen
I walked into Dad’s room that night feeling a bit more refreshed after my six-period nap in Mrs. Tate’s office. She woke me up a few times to see if I wanted to go home, but I refused, telling her that my house was too quiet. She seemed to understand and left me alone until the final bell rang.
I tried not to think about all the schoolwork I was missing. I was banking on the fact that most of the teachers would have heard about Dad and would cut me some slack.
Dad was sitting in his wheelchair with a cast on his leg. He was dressed in sweatpants with one leg cut off. He had a t-shirt on and was watching a basketball game. I reveled in the sound of him yelling at the screen. He was back to his normal self.
Rule #1: You Can't Date the Coach's Daughter (The Rules of Love) Page 13
