Reckless Abandon

by J N Owens

  “Have you thought anymore about that? It wouldn’t be a bad idea to go ahead and do that, you know while you are still in the school mindset. From what I have heard, once you get in the habit of working it gets hard to get back into the habit of school again. It’s just a thought. And you know we will support you no matter what you decide.”

  “Of course, we will. We got your back no matter what you decide.” Layla jumps in.

  “I know, it’s not that. I’m just so tired of school. And I know I can get where I want to be whether I start now at an entry level position and work my way up or go back to school for another 3 or 4 years. So, it’s just a matter of what I feel like doing or where I can get that job. I don’t know. We will see what comes up in the next couple months.”

  I think about it for a minute.

  “Yeah, I get that. Just think about it and make sure whatever decision you make, you’re doing it for the right reasons.”

  “I will. I promise.” Layla turns over and looks at us.

  “So, what’s the deal with this Daniel guy. I mean, seriously Em, be for real. Don’t bullshit us. He is kind of a douche. You don’t really like him, like him, do you? What’s really going on?” I give her a look that says shut up. And she just shrugs saying what, like she doesn’t know she is being stupid.

  “Well, I mean, I don’t know. We have spent so much time together. For the last couple years at school we have studied together and it’s like I just can’t get him out of my head. I don’t know if it’s one of those things like, you want what you can’t have, or I have spent so much time with him that he has just become what I think I want in someone. I mean I get it. I see what you see. I really do. But you don’t see what I see. When we are together, he is sweet, and funny and kind, and…”

  “And he takes out other girls and only studies with you. Oh, and he has a tiny little weenie!”

  “Layla, shut up. Jesus you have no control over your mouth.” I scold her, and laugh a little, because it is still funny. But sometimes she has absolutely no filter and doesn’t know when to just shut the fuck up and let someone talk.

  “And yes, he does take out gorgeous blond model types. And yes, he has tiny dick, but then he comes over and brings me my favorite food. And does amazing things with his tongue.” She laughs and waggles her eyebrows.

  “Why, does he think all you want is to eat? What the fuck is wrong with him? Fucking dick head. And a girl needs more than good oral, sometimes we need a good banging. We don’t need no short dick man!” Oh, here she goes again, but we all laugh anyway.

  “Alright, enough with the little dick jokes. Christ, Layla! He is thoughtful. After I saw him with that girl, he saw the hurt in my eyes. He came over and we talked. He said he always had feelings for me, but he didn’t think I felt that way about him. He always thought I was too good for him because I was too pretty and too smart. And he always goes out with shallow dumb girls because he thinks that’s all he can get. Yeah, they are pretty but not really what he wants to end up with. He wants someone smart, someone he can hold a conversation with. He said he loves the way I look. I asked him why? I asked him why he thought I was pretty, when I was fat, and plain. And he had hurt in his eyes. He took my hand and said I was anything but plain. He said I wasn’t fat. He said I was beautiful, and that my face showed what I had been through. He said he loved my curves, he loved my ass, that it was perfect. The way the small of my back curved in before my ass swelled out, and the way my hips were so full that I didn’t have to work to make them sway when I walked. The way my breasts filled out everything I wore perfectly, and I didn’t even have to wear fake shit to make them look full or push them up. Everything was perfect. He said I was perfect. And he said the most perfect thing was that he could talk to me. We could talk, about anything, and I wasn’t just an empty airbag. He appreciated that he could have important conversations with me. And then he kissed me. After he said all that he kissed me. He leaned in and pressed his lips to mine. It wasn’t hard. It wasn’t passionate. It was just a soft sweet kiss. And it was perfect. And that was all I needed, to know someone likes me. He doesn’t see a fat girl when he looks at me. He sees me.”

  We just look at her. A tear escapes from my eye. I knew she always had a low self-esteem, but I didn’t know she felt so bad about herself. Emory is beautiful. And I don’t say that because she is my sister. If she was a stranger on the street, I would stop in my tracks. She is stunning. She is shorter than me and Layla, probably about five four. She isn’t model skinny, so most people in today’s society probably look at her and think she is overweight. I look at her and I think she is gorgeous. Her face has an almost ethnic look to it. She has dark chocolate brown eyes with full eyebrows and high cheekbones. Her long nose is full, not pointy, with a little dimple on the end and it leads to her full pink lips. She has long beautiful black hair that if I didn’t know where we came from, I would swear she was Indian. She looks native through and through. She has beautiful tan skin, full hips, full breast, and an ass anyone would pay money for. Because of her height if she gains a few pounds it shows everywhere. Her legs aren’t long and slender like mine and Layla’s, but there are defined and thick. To me she is everything a woman should be, and if she was born in the 50’s or 60’s she would be considered a goddess. But to her, she is monstrous. By today’s standards she thinks she is the equivalent of the elephant man. It’s the most demeaning thing for a woman to have to adjust her self-worth based on what others think she should look like. Because not only on the outside but also on the inside, she is the most beautiful person.

  “Emory, you know your beauty isn’t measured by how he sees you. Your amazing whether he sees it or not.” She laughs.

  “I know. It’s just nice to know someone else sees it.”

  “Okay, sure, but do you like him too? Or are you just settling because he likes you?” Layla, always the reasonable one.

  “I mean he’s nice. I like him. There aren’t a lot of sparks, but yeah. We have fun.”

  “Wow, that fire is gonna burn me it’s so hot.” Layla starts to fan herself. And we all start laughing.

  “Smart ass, what about you and, wait what is this guy’s name?”

  “Who? Damon? Oh, he is just for fun. I haven’t met anyone who has even come close to making me want to settle down. I’m just having fun. You girls are the settling down type. Not me. I’m just out for a good time.” She waggles her eyebrows and pulls her sunglasses down over her eyes and lays back down.

  “You’re such a slut.” I tell her and we all laugh.

  We spend the rest of the afternoon lounging around and drinking. That evening the boys cook some steaks and we eat outside by the pool. We sit around afterwards drinking some more and talking. Everyone gets along well. We all joke and laugh and talk about our lives as kids and growing up. We end up in the pool all goofing off and playing. Noah and I end up getting out and heading upstairs around eleven. It was a long day and after drinking and being in the sun all day, we are ready to lay down. We get to our room and I head into the bathroom and turn on the shower. Noah comes in behind me and starts to untie my swimsuit. He pushes my hair over one shoulder and kisses on top of my shoulder around to the side of my neck up to my ear. I bend my head to the side to give him better access and lean back into him running my hands over his hard length inside his suit. His hands moving along my waist around the front of my stomach and up to my breast. My swimsuit has been completely untied now so he has access to my breasts as he grabs hold of both of them. He palms them both and runs his thumb and finger over my nipples and pinches them, pulling them, making them pebble and harden. I reach down and untie my bathing suit bottoms so they fall to the floor and reach back to push his down as he continues to kiss his way up and down my neck and shoulder. His right hand has worked its way down my stomach and to my wet core. He spreads my lips with two fingers and runs one down the middle to moisten it. He then uses his middle finger to circle my clit. He makes slow circles at first then
flicks it back and forth. I wrap my right arm around his neck to hold on as my knees start to get weak. I start to moan and cry out. He is moving his finger over and around then moves it down and pushes it inside me, I let out a soft cry at the feeling of him filling me partially. I’m so turned on and need him inside me. He knows I want him. I’m so wet its running down his hand and my leg. He pulls my ass apart and is running his hard cock up and down my slit while he works me from the front. I can feel the tightening in my core, it’s getting stronger and running up all the way to my head and down to my toes. Then, I explode. I call out his name, I feel my pussy tighten and he rubs slow strokes from my clit to my opening to make it last and ease me down. Before I know what’s happening, he pushes down on my back, bending me over the sink and pushes into me from behind. He eases in slow at first. But that’s not what I want, I just barely came down from my orgasm and I want him to fuck me hard. I grab hold of the sink and push back into him hard, arching my back for better access. He takes hold of my hips and starts moving faster and harder. I can hear him moan behind me.

  “Fin, is this what you want? Tell me you want it.”

  “Yes. Noah. I want you. Just like this. Fuck me hard.”

  “Good baby. That’s good. Come for me again.”

  And he starts to fuck me harder and harder slamming into me as I slam into the sink. He reaches around and grabs my breast with one hand, massaging it, and pinching my nipple. He feels so good like this. With every thrust I cry out, and he meets every one of my cries with one of his own. He reaches his hand around to rub my clit, he rubs it and pinches it.

  “Finley, fuck, come with me.”

  That sends me over the edge again. I cry out, “Yeas. Noah. Fuck. Yes.”

  My legs stiffen and then I relax, and he rides out his orgasm as he comes inside me. I feel it warm from the inside. We stay like that for a minute, then he slowly pulls out and pulls me up into his chest. He turns me around to face him taking my face firmly in between his hands. He runs them back into my hair and slams his mouth to mine. My head is tilted back by the force of the kiss. I feel him go from half hard to fully hard within seconds. It never takes him much to get there when we are together. I always wonder if it’s just me or if he just loves sex that much. At this moment I don’t care because it feels too good. I wrap my arms around his neck and lift my legs up and hook them over his hips. Noah turns and moves us into the tiled shower where he takes me again. He holds me close and runs his hands over my body and kisses me all over. He starts with the hard-passionate kisses against my mouth like he can’t get enough of me. Then he is moving down my jaw and my neck, over my breast while he needs them and pinches them. I have my hands in his hair gripping it so tight I may pull some out. I grind my hips up into him, meeting him thrust for thrust. The electricity and burn starts to build again. It starts off slow and easy this time.

  “Noah, that’s it, don’t stop. Please. Yeah yeah please. Oh Noah…”

  He starts to thrust harder but keeping the same steady pace. I shift my hips, so my clit is rubbing up and down with his thrusts. And the next time he reaches up and cups my breast, he puts my nipple in his mouth, he bites down on it. I am sent soaring with my orgasm. I tighten my legs around him digging my heels into his ass. I pull his head back by his hair calling out his name on a loud cry. Noah makes a few more hard thrusts pushing me harder into the wall and then he is grasping my ass and pulling me into him with one last pump. I feel him release into me, again. He has his head in the crook of my neck breathing hard and kissing gently. I run my hands gently up and down his back. He slowly releases my legs and I slide them down to the floor. He steps back and looks down at me.

  “I love you, Finley Grace.” He leans in and brushes his lips lightly over mine. “I want to marry you and make you happy for the rest of our lives.”

  I just stare at him. It’s crazy. It’s been less than a month. With Scott I thought he was crazy, but standing here looking at Noah, I don’t think he is crazy at all. It feels right. Maybe that’s the difference. In the back of my mind, I always knew something was off with Scott, but with Noah I have always felt right.

  “Fin, I know it’s fast. I know it sounds crazy. I can see it in your eyes. But I am not getting younger. I am almost forty. It’s not old I know. But the minute I saw you sitting by the pool I knew I had already wasted too much time. All this time we could have been together, and I blew it. I was so afraid what people would say. But I won’t waste any more time. I know without a doubt you are made for me. You are the one I am going to spend my life with.” I smile up at him.

  “It’s not fast Noah. I mean yeah it is. But when I look at you, I don’t doubt you. I don’t doubt us. I never have. I love you too, Noah Christopher. I think I have since you came up to me in Miami. If I’m honest maybe even before that.” He smiles, and it’s not his normal you made me happy smile. It’s a full body smile. It goes from his eyes all the way to his toes. Yeah, I can see his toes smile.

  “So, is that a yes? Are you saying you will marry me?”

  “Yes, of course.” I laugh.

  “Really? You just made my absolute night.” He grabs me and hugs me. He kisses me all over my face and neck. I just giggle.

  We finish up in the shower and wash each other, goofing off and joking. We kiss and grope. Finally, we make our way out. He takes a towel off the shelf and wraps me in it before taking one for himself. We walk out to the bedroom and stop dead in our tracks. The sounds coming through the wall is so loud. Emory’s room is right next to ours. Apparently, her and Daniel are having quite the time, even with his tiny dick. I look over at Noah, his eyes are wide, and his mouth is on the floor. We both burst out laughing. Then it occurs to me, we weren’t so quiet.

  “Oh my God Noah, if we can hear them then they could hear us. Wait they are on the other side of the bedroom. Who is on the other side of the bathroom?” he looks around trying to work out the layout. He freezes.

  “Fuck, that’s your dads’ room.” I pale.

  “Are you fucking kidding me? How did that happen? Why did the room assignments end up with my parents anywhere near us?” I’m whispering now like it fucking matters.

  “Babe, seriously. Does it matter at this point? We are adults. We aren’t teenagers sneaking around behind their backs.” He laughs as he wraps me in a hug. I worry my lip between my teeth.

  “Yeah I guess you’re right. It’s just weird.” He continues and pulls me to the bed.

  “Not any weirder than us having to listen to your sister.” We both cringe a little at that, because it is so loud. And oh my god Daniel is a dirty fucker.

  “Oh my God, your right. I really don’t want to hear that.” We get in the bed and snuggle under the covers. Noah turns the TV on and leaves it just loud enough to drown out the moaning and dirty talk from my sister’s room. But hey…good for her. She deserves a little action. We fall asleep with infomercials playing, Noah’s arms wrapped around me and our legs tangles together.

  The next morning, I make my way down to the kitchen, my mom is making breakfast. Layla and Em are sitting at the bar drinking coffee. As soon as Emory turns to say good morning, I blush and start laughing.

  “What is so funny?” She just looks at me.

  “You got yourself a bit of a small dick dirty talker there, Em. I’m glad to hear you had a good end to your night. A marathon end, none-the-less. At least if its little, it’s got stamina. One out of two ain’t bad.” Layla’s eyes get big and she turns, and we both burst out laughing.

  “What did I miss? What the fuck happened last night?” she manages to get out while she is laughing.

  “Language girls, my goodness,” mom turns at Layla cutting her off.

  “Oh, for fucks sake mom, you say much worse than that. Get over it, we are all adults here. Now what did we miss? What happened?” Layla is completely perked up now. It’s like the sound of dirty talk gets her high or something. I palm my face and just spit it out.

  “Emory’s roo
m is next to mine. When we were getting into bed last night, we heard some explicit sounds coming from their room. And it sounded like ole Danny boy likes it dirty.” I smile wide when I say it and look from Emory to Layla. About that time Susan comes in the kitchen, she is still half-asleep yawning and wiping her eyes.

  “Yeah the walls here are pretty thin. I heard some pretty wild noises coming from the bathroom next to our room last night too. It’s like this house has pheromones coming out of the walls. It’s crazy.” She doesn’t even look at anyone as she makes herself a cup of coffee. Like it’s no big deal. We all look at each other and start laughing.

  “Well, I know I got a pounding last night. But I didn’t hear anyone else. I was too drunk to notice. I passed out right after.” Leave it to Layla, she is the most outspoken of us all. Besides mom, I think that’s where she gets from. Mom just isn’t as foul as Layla.

  “Alright ladies that’s enough of that. Can we have a more civilized conversation for breakfast? The boys will be down any minute.” She sounds so serious, but she has laughter in her eyes.

  “Yes ma’am” we all say together.

  We spend the week swimming, cooking out, sailing, anything we get a wild hair about doing we go out and do. It’s fun, exciting, and absolutely relaxing. Labor Day evening, we build a bonfire on the beach and take some folding chairs down with a cooler and sit out by the fire to watch the fireworks. The guys went and found a firework stand and bought bags of fireworks for themselves. We play music and drink, around 9 the fireworks start and it’s beautiful. We all just lay back and watch them. Once they end, the guys get up and get all theirs out. They spend over an hour sending off different fireworks. We play with sparklers down by the water. I feel like a kid again. Our parents end up going back inside. So, Layla, Emory, and I decide to surprise the guys. We are standing right at the edge of the water. We call out to the guys who are standing around the fire. They turn to look at us, when we have their attention, we all reach up and undo our bathing suit tops and let them fall to the ground. All the guys eyes get as big as saucers. It’s comical. Noah is the first to move. We all remove our bottoms and turn and run into the ocean. It feels great this time of year. And this late at night no one is around to see. Noah catches me before I’m all the way in. He wraps me up in his arms and takes me under. When we come up, I have my legs wrapped around him, he is holding me up with his hands on my ass. The others have caught up too and they have moved off on their own. It’s almost a full moon tonight and the sky is full of stars. It’s a beautiful night. We just sit there in the water holding each other, looking up at the stars.