Suddenly I was before him, shoving an angry finger in his chest. Just like my Gabriel, this one’s chest was like a rock. Poking it hurt me more than it did him. “Why didn’t you just tell me the truth? Why didn’t you come to me instead of lying?”
“If I told you the truth from the start, you—”
I cut in, blunt, “Don’t tell me what I would or would not have done. You don’t know me. I’m not your Kass. Just as you two are different people, we are, too. Do not treat me like you would’ve treated your Kass.” I recalled what Raphael said, adding, “Just because you loved her, does not mean you love me. Whatever happened in the house, whatever you were trying to do…” I referenced the kiss. “…it can’t happen.”
Gabriel studied me for a moment, quietly saying, “Understood.”
Though his reply didn’t sound nearly as wholehearted as I wanted it to.
“And if you’re going to stay here and help us, you have to do just that: help us. No more forcing John and Raphael to lie to me for you. No lying to me at all. If you stay here, you have to help me get back to my world. I have a home to go back to. A home I miss. Gabriel, Michael, Koath and Max. I have a family. It might be strange, but it works. I can’t stay here.”
“If you go back to your world,” Gabriel began.
“I heard it from Raphael. Some things happen no matter what. I’ve had visions of my mom telling me I’m going to die for I don’t know how long. It’s been ingrained into my head that I’m going to die young,” I told him, shaking my head. “I’m not afraid to die.”
“Only the pure,” Gabriel whispered, rubbing the spot where I shoved my finger in his chest, “or the truly evil are not afraid to die. And you are not evil. The farthest from it.” Coming from the Devil, I wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or not. He reached for my face to cup my cheek, but I backed away.
“See, that—that’s what I’m talking about.”
Gabriel quickly withdrew his hand, apologizing, “Sorry.”
Crossing my arms, I smirked. “How often does the Devil apologize? Because I’m racking them up quick over here.”
“You are the only one worth apologizing to.”
The smirk fell from my face. “Actually, if you’re going to stay, I’m going to make you apologize to two more people. They’re sitting downstairs.”
A hint of the Gabriel I knew surfaced as he moaned, “No.”
“Yes,” I replied, gleefully. I walked past him, into the upper bedroom. “Come on. Let’s get it over with.” Who knew making the Devil grovel and say he was sorry could be so much fun?
Chapter Twenty-Five – John
I couldn’t say I blamed Kass for being upset. Being lied to was never fun or on my list of things to do. I didn’t want to do it; but I couldn’t help it. When the creature that owned your soul told you to do something, you did it. You had no choice. I was just glad it was over. I thought I would have to go on with the lie until…well, until the Devil took a bride to the Underworld.
Did that even happen? Did the Devil ever take women down with him? In Hell, was there physical presence, or was it more a spiritual realm? I had no clue, but I’d find out eventually. I was certain that’s where my soul would go once I met my true death.
After breaking the totem, it was I who went crazy, not Kirk. I was the one who killed woman after woman, tearing them apart like an animal during sex…creating a bloody scene in the bedroom, leaving Kirk to clean it up and pretend it didn’t happen, that everything was all right. He tried teaching me self-control; it took decades to instill in me what came so naturally for him.
It was not Kirk who deserved to be captured and made a slave to the King and the Queen; it was me. I should’ve been taken. I should’ve been the one in the mask. Not Kirk. Not the good brother.
I sat on the couch, head in my hands, wishing everything was different. Raphael had gone upstairs a few minutes ago to console Kass, leaving me alone to wrestle with my thoughts. To say that I was filled with self-loathing and self-hatred would not be enough.
I hated myself, my past, my entire situation. I wished I could’ve taken Kirk’s place. It could’ve been the one thing I did right in my life. But it was too late. Far too late to change any of that.
Soon, Raphael sat across from me. We’d covered the windows in order to light candles, giving us some form of light other than the silvery glow from the moon. He wiped his hands on his knees, surveying my hunched figure and my weary expression.
“He’s gone on to a better place, John,” Raphael spoke carefully, pausing when I looked up at him.
“He should never have been put in that position to begin with,” I said, bitter. “It was because of me that he was taken in the first place.”
“You should not believe that. It was not your fault. No one could have predicted the Queen’s moves.”
I blinked, grinding my teeth as I thought of her. “I should have. You should have. We all should’ve known.”
Raphael shook his head. “Putting blame on your shoulders will not help.”
“And what would you know about blame?” I questioned, growing irate. Raphael always spoke like he knew everything. Full of wisdom and knowledge. How did he get so knowledgeable? How did he become so chock full of wisdom?
How could he purify a greater Vampire with nothing but his fist?
I knew what he could do, but I did not know how it came to be.
Raphael’s gaze clouded over. “I know a lot about it. More than you know.” He dug in the satchel he brought from the church, tossing something to me. As I caught it and studied it, he said, “I found that journal in Michael’s house the day before…all this happened.”
I traced the ancient leather binding, confused as to why he decided to show this to me now. “And what does this have to do with anything?”
“That journal belonged to someone I loved greatly. She was my first…” Raphael blinked, shaking off his feelings. “…my greatest mistake. I could not believe it when I laid eyes on it in the library. After all these years, to have my mistake remain in writing, it boggles the mind. I still dream of her, sometimes. My sweet Leliana.” His fingers intertwined, and he muttered, “My methods were not always as clean as they were today, and that is something I regret deeply.”
I set the journal on my lap, turning as Kass walked down the stairs, followed shortly by Gabriel. My eyes narrowed. I should’ve known. I jumped up, ready to fight, to end it once and for all, but the look on Kass’s face made me stop.
She held up a hand, saying, “Sit back down. Both of you. Gabriel has something to say, and I want you to hear him out.” Kass pushed the Devil in front of her, her moxie unmatched.
Was it Gabriel speaking, or the Devil?
It didn’t matter. They were one in the same, now.
Gabriel looked to Raphael, and then to me, lingering on me, probably recalling our fight not too long ago. The words we shared, how he had his fingers wrapped around my heart, threatening to yank it out and take my soul.
“I…” Gabriel broke his silence, taking his time with his words. “…am sorry.”
When he said no more, Kass prompted him, “Sorry for what?”
“Sorry for compelling you to lie to Kass.”
“Is that all you have to say?” Kass whispered, nudging him softly.
Sighing, Gabriel added, “I will not compel you to do anything again.”
I couldn’t believe it. The Devil was saying he was sorry? Even Raphael’s mouth was agape in shock. Slowly bringing my gaze away from Raphael, I lifted it to Gabriel, wondering how far he was willing to go to make Kass happy, to gain her forgiveness. I did something I wasn’t proud of: I egged on the Devil.
Not smart, but then again I was never the intelligent one. That title belonged to Kirk, too.
“Are you also sorry for trying to kill me?” I asked, innocent.
The question stunned Kass, for she turned on Gabriel, asking, “You tried to kill John? When?”
“Right befo
re the Nightwalkers attacked,” Gabriel replied, glaring at me.
Kass was lost in thought. “It was your hand that reached out, wasn’t it? God, it makes so much more sense now.”
I clarified, “He was going to take my soul, but decided he’d take Kirk’s instead to make me suffer more.”
Kass wasn’t happy with the revelation, for she frowned at the Devil. “Is this true?”
Gabriel waited a moment before answering, “Yes.”
She said nothing more, only gesturing toward me.
The groan that escaped Gabriel was audible to all those in the room, but he did not argue. He stared squarely at me and said, “I am sorry for trying to kill you, and for attempting to take Kirk’s soul. Kirk was a good man. His soul did not deserve the fate that would’ve awaited him in Hell.”
Kass coughed. Something was clearly missing from that apology.
“And,” Gabriel added, “I will not do it again. You have my word.”
I wanted to see a crack in his façade, I wanted to see a stain on the white armor he currently bared for Kass, but I could not. The Devil was a deceiving beast, and right now, even I was fooled. This apology seemed genuine.
Raphael was stunned, and it took him a while to regain his senses. “Thank you, Gabriel. We appreciate it.” Kind, even to those who didn’t deserve it. He was a model after his creator, wasn’t he?
I, on the other hand, wasn’t so kind.
“Even though the apology is basically coming from Kass,” I chimed in, shrugging as if it were nothing.
Kass stepped in, taking turns to give us each a glare. “All of you will get along. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but we will have a much easier time doing this, finding the staff, if we work together. No fighting. No arguing. Got it?”
All three of us reluctantly nodded, each wondering just what our little foursome was going to do.
I knew one thing, though: Alyssa wasn’t going to enjoy helping the Devil. Then again, she probably wasn’t going to like helping her ex-lover, either.
We were all kinds of screwed up, weren’t we?
Chapter Twenty-Six – Kass
I sat on the couch in the living room, gripping my rose blade tightly. I studied the petals on the hilt, the immaculately carved silver rose at the top. Whoever designed this sword did a spectacular job. By far, it was my favorite weapon, and not just because it was mine.
In a way, it was like me. Pretty and deadly.
My heart beat rapidly, and I nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang. I thought it’d be Michael or Raphael, even Gabriel, calling to inform me of their progress. But when I reached the cordless phone sitting on the kitchen counter, I hesitated. Something wasn’t right.
There was a knock on the door. A pounding that echoed in my ears.
My hesitation disappeared. I gathered my strength, my courage, and went to the door, tossing it open to see John. He had his hands in his pockets, looking dour. His dark irises were heavy with emotions I could not describe.
This was getting too familiar.
“What are you doing here?” I said, both annoyed and confused.
“We need to talk” was what he said.
I then did something I never expected myself to do: I said “No” and closed the door in his face. Just as my fingers relaxed on both the lock and my rose blade, a metal clanging erupted behind me, and I spun to face a metal mask falling down the stairwell.
Bits of gore and flesh stuck to the inside of the mask, oozing out on the hardwood floor. The blood that seeped from it was far more than it should’ve been; soon it coated the entire floor, rising up the walls, defying all laws of gravity. It didn’t stop until even the ceiling was coated in a dark maroon.
It was more blood than I’d ever seen in my entire life, and that was saying something.
There was a commotion deeper in the kitchen. Koath was there, his hands trembling. He and I were the only things not doused completely in blood, but there some dripped from his hands.
“Koath!” I shouted, running to him, dropping my rose blade. “What happened?” I frantically tried to find where his wound was, the source of the blood on his hands, but I found nothing wrong with him.
“Come home,” he whispered, touching my face lightly, the red wetness spreading across my face in the form of a handprint. “Please come home.”
“I’m trying,” I spoke, gazing up into the eyes of the man who was like my father. The closest thing I’d ever known to a parent. It’s why it hurt so much when he left me for England, to go on some secret mission for the Council.
I thought having him back in my life meant everything would go back to normal, the way it was before he left. But he brought Max back with him, and I’d been through too much since he went away to be the same Kass he knew.
“I love you,” he muttered.
It was the first time I’d heard it in years, other than over the phone. My mouth was open, I was ready to say it in return, for it was true, but another woman’s voice rang out through the blood-soaked house.
“Gag me, am I right?” She laughed. “Disgusting displays of affection.”
Koath pulled away from me, backing up and falling to his knees, allowing me to observe the woman standing behind him. She was dressed casually, jeans and a t-shirt, her brown hair curled in a messy way. But there was something about her that was off. Her face was covered in a mask. A fancy, Venetian mask, blue and feathered. It hid every feature, discerning her identity.
“High-time to end this reunion, don’t you think?” the woman spoke lowly, dragging a sharp nail along Koath’s neck. Koath did nothing to stop her. His skin parted, a deep red line forming where her nail was. Blood spewed forth, mixing with that already on the ground.
“No,” I cried, rushing toward her. But by the time I reached where she was, I was no longer in the house. I was in the town square, where town hall was. I recognized it from a few drives to the supermarket.
But in this world, it was very different. Cars sat, overturned and smashed, long unused in the streets. Telephone poles were knocked over, leaning on roofs of nearby buildings. Cracks grew in the pavement. It was overgrown, like Chernobyl after thirty years.
That wasn’t what caught my attention, though.
It was the sheer volume of Nightwalkers that wandered mindlessly through its streets. The horde we fought at the prison was a mere fraction of those who still walked the city streets.
I swore loudly.
Why did I have the nagging feeling that we’d have to fight our way through this?
The next morning, or, more correctly, when I woke up, I made my way downstairs to find that the guys were pretty much ready to go. Gabriel stood by himself, sullen and broody. John sat curled in a chair, reading some book. Raphael was in the kitchen, sitting alone, staring at his dagger resting on the table.
I sat beside him, taking my time to ask, “You want to tell me how you did that blue-glowing thing? Not going to lie, it was cool. Can you teach me how to do it? Because apparently normal weapons do nothing against Daywalkers.”
Raphael smiled a bit. “Unfortunately, no. I cannot teach you how to purify a Daywalker. Not in the same way, at least.”
His response stunned me, and it took me a while to clarify, “Purify? I’m a Purifier. It’s what I do—about the only thing I can do well, actually.”
“You were born into this fight, but I can assure you, the fight to purify Demons and cleanse the world has been transpiring since the very beginning of time.”
I sighed. “Why are you always so…” I couldn’t think of the right word to use, so I stopped.
“So what?” Raphael prodded, raising his eyebrows.
As I looked at him, I couldn’t help but remember how I found him attractive in my world. Sure, he wasn’t bad in this world, but the long hair I just wasn’t into. Then again, in my world he always wore a priest’s outfit, so what did that say about me? That I had some deep, unresolved issues about my life?
&nb
sp; Or maybe that I was a teenage girl whose hormones sometimes got the better of her, in spite of everything I did to hedge them.
“The way you talk. It’s just…weird.”
“How very eloquent of you,” he teased me.
“My point exactly,” I muttered, rolling my eyes.
Raphael stood, sheathing his dagger on his hip as he said, “What is life without a bit of mystery?” He walked into the front room, where the tension between Gabriel and John was palpable. Neither man acknowledged it, however. Both pretended the other didn’t exist.
I followed him, saying mostly to myself, “I’ve had enough mysteries to last a lifetime.”
Raphael was the one who broke the tension in the front room, saying, “We should head out. If we move fast, we’ll make it to Haven within a few hours. With any luck, we’ll get the help we need.”
John closed his book, shoving it in his shirt. As we began the long trek, taking the side streets, I found myself walking beside him, studying him. I still couldn’t believe the difference between the two Johns. This one…let’s just say if I didn’t already have bad history with mine, I would’ve fallen hard for this John.
Very, very hard.
“Looking forward to seeing your sister again?” I asked, trying to fill the void of silence that our group carried.
All John did was frown slightly. “I don’t know.”
“How long has it been since you’ve seen each other?”
“I don’t know,” he repeated. “Years.”
My eyebrows furrowed as I was slow to say, “You don’t seem happy that we’re going to her for help.”
“I...left when everything went down, when we lost Kirk.” John side glanced at me, expression heavier than I wanted. This was supposed to be small talk, not a doom and gloom, the-weight-of-the-world-was-on-my-shoulders talk. “I couldn’t bear to stay. When she looked at me, I could tell she wished it was I who was taken, and not Kirk.”
That was a terrible thing to think, putting all the blame on himself. “I don’t believe that for a second. Alyssa would never think anything like that.”
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