The Secret Pond

by Gerri Hill

  “Thank you for bringing me and Jack here. It’s…it’s a beautiful place. So peaceful.”

  “Yeah. I’m glad you like it.”

  “We come here often, though. Will it lose the special atmosphere that your grandfather wanted to preserve?”

  “I don’t think so. I like sharing it with you and Jack,” she said honestly.

  Hannah moved her float a little closer to her, a smile on her lips. “By the way, you have perfect breasts.”

  Lindsey felt a blush on her face. “You did not just say that.”

  Hannah laughed. “I did. It’s the truth.”

  Lindsey wanted to protest. Hannah was the one with the perfect breasts. She’d stared at Hannah standing naked on the pier long enough for the sight to be permanently imprinted on her brain. Hannah’s breasts were fuller than they appeared in a bikini. Full and firm and…perfect.

  She cleared her throat. “Let’s stop talking about breasts.”

  Hannah laughed. “You’re too cute sometimes, you know.”

  Chapter Forty

  Lindsey felt tears threaten as Hannah brought out the cake. She was nearly overcome with emotion when Hannah and Jack started singing “Happy Birthday” to her.

  “And many more,” Hannah added at the end. “Make a wish.”

  Lindsey held her eyes, shocked that Hannah had remembered her birthday. She’d only mentioned it to her the one time that she recalled. Yet here she was, after spending the day alone—feeling sorry for herself—celebrating with the two people who meant more to her than anyone in the world.

  “Blow them out! Blow them out!”

  She closed her eyes for a second, wishing for something she had no business wishing for, then took a deep breath, blowing out all thirty candles in one try.

  Jack clapped. “Yay!” He scooted closer to her at the table, so close that their arms were touching. “This is my favorite cake. You’re going to love it too. It’s a double chocolate chip on the inside and the icing is made with cream cheese.”

  She nudged him. “I figured it had cheese in it somewhere.” She looked up at Hannah. “Thank you. I’m touched.”

  Hannah smiled sweetly at her. “You thought I forgot.”

  “It’s not like we talked about it.”

  She sliced off a big corner piece for Jack. “I’m sorry I couldn’t spend the day with you, though.”

  “Did you get packed?”

  “Yes.”

  “What time are we leaving?” Jack asked with a mouth full of cake.

  “In the morning.”

  Leaving. Yes, for three days. Three whole days. The Labor Day weekend loomed long and lonely. At least she’d have Barney to keep her and Max company. And she’d already told herself she wasn’t going to wallow in sorrow. She wasn’t going to spend the weekend rekindling the grief she’d finally gotten past. She had gone that morning to the grocery store and stocked up. In years past, the Labor Day holiday—like all holidays—was built around food and fun. Just because she’d be alone didn’t mean she couldn’t keep some of the traditions alive. She’d bought a large pork roast and ribs. She’d get her grandfather’s smoker going in the morning and slow cook the meat all day. Ribs and pulled pork sandwiches would be her weekend meals. And on Monday, she’d do burgers. Hannah and Jack would be back in time to join her when they stopped over to get Barney. It would be the first time Hannah had actually driven to her house.

  “I wish Lindsey was going with us.”

  Lindsey and Hannah exchanged glances. “I do too,” Hannah said.

  Lindsey smiled. “And what would we do with Max and Barney?”

  “Oh.”

  “I’ll see you on Monday for burgers, remember?”

  “Yeah…but what are you going to do while we’re gone?” Jack asked.

  “I’ll find something to do. Maybe I’ll get up early and go fishing.”

  “Are you still going to take me next weekend?”

  “Of course.” She took the small plate from Hannah. “Thank you.” Lindsey took one bite of the cake and decided that double chocolate chip with cream cheese icing was her new favorite dessert. “This is so good.”

  “Told you,” Jack mumbled as he shoved another bite into his mouth.

  After they’d eaten, Lindsey helped Hannah clean up the kitchen. Dinner had been leftovers from the enchilada casserole they’d had the other night. Jack had announced that this was his second favorite casserole after he’d added more cheese to his plate.

  “He’s growing like a weed but thankfully up and not out,” Hannah said.

  “When’s his birthday? You said November.”

  “The fifteenth. I can’t believe he’ll be ten already. Before you know it, he’ll be a teenager.” Hannah laughed. “And I’m trying not to think about it.”

  “He’s a good kid. He won’t give you any trouble.”

  “I hope you’re right.” Hannah folded the dish towel and placed it on the counter. “So? What do you have planned for the weekend?”

  “I’m going to barbecue and drink beer and play in the river.” She grinned. “Not necessarily in that order.”

  Hannah touched her arm, letting her hand rest there. “I’m sorry we won’t be here.”

  “Nothing to be sorry about, Hannah. You enjoy your time with your family. That’s what holidays are for.” As soon as she said the words, her heart tightened in her chest. Yes, that’s what holidays are for. But not for her. Not anymore. Suddenly, her brave words of earlier—that she was over her grief—haunted her.

  “I’d rather stay here with you.”

  She looked at Hannah, trying to read her eyes. “I’ll be okay. Me and the boys…we’ll play.”

  Hannah moved closer, wrapping her arms around her shoulders as Lindsey’s arms went around her waist. She sunk into the embrace, fighting back the sadness that she was feeling.

  “I’m going to miss you,” Hannah whispered into her ear.

  Lindsey squeezed her eyes shut, savoring the moment. “I’m going to miss you too.”

  Chapter Forty-One

  Hannah stood at the window, looking out on her parents’ backyard and pool. Jack was standing on the side, showing anyone who would watch his new diving technique he’d learned from Lindsey. Watching him made her heart ache. Watching him made her miss Lindsey even more and it was only Saturday.

  “There you are,” her mother said. “I was wondering where you got off to.”

  “I came in for…for a drink,” she said, holding up the bottle of water she had yet to open.

  Her mother came closer, studying her. “Are you okay? You’ve been awfully quiet.”

  “I’m fine.” She forced a smile to her face. “Jack is having a wonderful time.”

  Her mother linked arms with her. “You can’t fool me, honey. What’s wrong? Is it the holiday? Are you missing James?”

  Hannah stared at her, blinking several times. My God, she hadn’t even given James a thought in days. She should lie. She should say yes. Her mother would understand. But she didn’t want her mother’s sympathy. There was no need for it. She couldn’t possibly tell her mother the truth though. That, she would never understand.

  “I’m fine, Mom,” she said evasively. “Is there something I can do to help with dinner?”

  “No, no. There are three large pizzas out in the extra fridge. Your father’s newest passion is grilling pizza. They’re quite good. I hope everyone will like them.”

  “I’m sure we will.” She headed to the door with her mother, then paused. “I’ll be right out.” Her mother looked at her questioningly. “I want to call Lindsey real quick. Make sure everything’s okay there. She’s babysitting Barney, you know.”

  She went back to her old room, the room she was sharing with Jack. Her phone was on the dresser and she picked it up, wondering if Lindsey might still be out at the river. No. She was probably back, already sitting on her deck. Drinking a glass of wine? Maybe a cocktail? Was she cooking? She could picture Lindsey sitting in her
chair, the dogs lying beside her, her gaze on the deer feeder, waiting for the first one to come out to eat. Then she smiled. No, the dogs were probably in the kitchen, in the air-conditioned house.

  She sighed. She was enjoying seeing her family. She really was. But she’d be lying if she said she wouldn’t rather be at home…with Lindsey. She didn’t want to think too much about it. She didn’t want to analyze it. It was just…there. She didn’t want to put it into words. She didn’t want to go there…not yet.

  She did, however, want to call Lindsey, to hear her voice, to know that she was okay. After three rings, her disappointment grew. Was she still out? Was she in the shower? Was she okay? Had she had an accident?

  “Hey there.”

  Hannah let out a relieved sigh. “Hey.” She squeezed her phone tighter. “Is everything okay?”

  “Are you checking up on me?”

  Hannah could hear the smile in her voice. “Busted.”

  “I’m fine. I’ve got thirty more minutes on the ribs and the dogs are already drooling.”

  “I’m sure they are.” She paused. “Did you get out to the river today?”

  “I went to the pond instead.”

  Hannah smiled, her voice low. “And did you skinny-dip?”

  “I did. It wasn’t nearly as much fun alone.”

  Hannah laughed. They’d gone three times to the pond to skinny-dip and she felt nearly shameless at how uninhibited she’d become. “I’m sorry I missed that.”

  “The dogs don’t think I’m nearly as much fun as Jack, though. I think they’re bored with me.” Lindsey paused for a second. “So…are you having a good time?”

  “Yes,” she said automatically. “No,” she said truthfully.

  “What’s wrong?”

  Hannah sat down on her bed, chewing her lower lip. “Lindsey…I…I miss you.”

  She heard Lindsey take a deep breath. “I miss you too, Hannah.” The words were soft, quiet, and they caused Hannah’s heart to race.

  She cleared her throat and stood up quickly. “So we’re having grilled pizza for dinner,” she said, changing their conversation to a safer subject. A much safer subject.

  “Grilled pizza, huh? Sounds interesting.”

  “I’d rather have ribs.”

  Lindsey laughed. “No, you’d rather have a steak.”

  “True.” She cleared her throat again. “Well, I guess I should get back out there. I just wanted to check on you.”

  “Thank you for calling. And for worrying about me.”

  “Enjoy your ribs. I’ll be thinking about you as I’m eating my pizza.”

  After a quiet “goodbye” from both of them, she ended the call. She sat down heavily on the bed again and lay back, staring up at the ceiling. “Oh, Hannah…what are you going to do? What in the world are you going to do?”

  * * *

  Lindsey…I…I miss you.

  The words echoed over and over in her mind. Things between them were changing. It wasn’t a sudden change, so it shouldn’t scare her as much as it did. No, things had been changing ever so slowly all summer. They either needed to put a stop to it…or…or what? Did Hannah even know what was happening? Surely, she did. Their time at the pond, their trips there to go skinny-dipping…there wasn’t anything “normal” about it any longer. Subtle flirting—from both of them—should have been a clue, as should the hugs that had ceased being between friends a long time ago.

  What would they do now? Would they continue to ignore it and pretend it wasn’t there? Or would they talk about it? Get it out in the open?

  “I vote to ignore it,” she murmured.

  At least for a while. At least until she could wrap her mind around it.

  Lindsey…I…I miss you.

  Chapter Forty-Two

  So this is what the road to Lindsey’s driveway looked like. Now she knew why they always met at the creek. If either of them were to actually drive to the other’s house, it would take at least thirty minutes. They were on completely opposite sides.

  “Can you believe all the people that were in the river?” Jack asked. “I’m glad we don’t have to share our part with anyone.”

  “Our part? Don’t you mean Lindsey’s part?”

  He grinned. “Yeah, but she kinda acts like it’s ours too.”

  “She does. But it’s not.” And yes, the river was crowded with people. And why not? It wasn’t even noon yet. It was a holiday. It was over ninety degrees already.

  Yet she’d rushed away from her parents’ house and pool, barely taking the time for breakfast. Jack had seemed anxious to get back too. She, herself, was beyond anxious. The weekend seemed to drag by and she’d only barely resisted the urge to call Lindsey last night. To check on her, she told herself. It had to be emotionally hard for her to be there all alone on a holiday. From what Lindsey had told her, holidays were special in their family. She imagined the weekend had been hard for her.

  “Mom?”

  “Huh?”

  “I kinda miss Lindsey.”

  She smiled. “Just kinda?”

  “Do you miss her?”

  She nodded. “I do. And we’ll see her in a minute.”

  “Do you think she’ll want to go to the river this afternoon?”

  “You spent the entire weekend in the pool. Aren’t you sick of the water?”

  “No. We could play on the rope swing a little.”

  “Okay. Ask her. We’re just going to pick Barney up and head home. She was planning on picking us up at the creek. We’re having burgers, remember?”

  “I remember.”

  Hannah turned off the main county road they were on at the landmark Lindsey had told her. The dirt road was bumpy, and she slowed as she crossed the cattle guard, signaling the entrance to Lindsey’s property. The house was more than a mile down the road and as they got closer, she recognized the side trail that they took to get to the river.

  “Now I know where we are,” she said.

  “That way to the river,” Jack said, pointing.

  As they approached the house, she saw Lindsey’s Jeep out and she wondered if she’d gone somewhere. She most often kept it in the garage. Next to the Jeep was the Mule and Hannah parked beside it. Lindsey was out on the deck and she felt her anticipation grow. Jack jumped out as soon as she stopped and he ran up the steps and nearly flung himself at Lindsey. Hannah’s heart swelled as she watched them hug. Then Jack was rubbing on Barney and Max and Lindsey’s eyes were on her.

  She walked up the steps, never breaking eye contact. She didn’t hesitate as she walked into her arms. Their hug was tight, long…and totally inappropriate between friends. She was aware of every spot their bodies touched, and she was in no hurry to break the embrace. But the dogs brushed against them, demanding attention too. When they pulled apart, she realized how much things had changed between them. As she looked into Lindsey’s eyes, she knew that Lindsey recognized the change too. Oddly, that didn’t frighten her.

  * * *

  “Pizza on the grill. It was good too,” Jack said. “We should try that sometime.”

  “I don’t know if we can buy fresh pizza around here,” she said.

  “I bet Mom could make one.”

  Lindsey looked over at Hannah, who had floated to the other side of the river. She had a smile on her face as she watched them.

  “What is Mom going to make?”

  “A pizza,” Jack said. “So we can grill it.”

  “How about we just stick to regular stuff on the grill and leave Mom out of it?”

  “You know what I want,” Lindsey said to Jack. “Spaghetti and meatballs.”

  “Oh, yeah. Maybe she could do that this week.”

  Hannah floated back over to them. “Are you two starving or what? That’s all you’ve been talking about is food.”

  “I like to eat,” Jack said.

  “No kidding.”

  Lindsey’s laughed. “He’s a growing boy.”

  “And what’s your excuse?”


  “You’re an exceptional cook. I’ve become very spoiled.”

  Hannah gave her a flirty smile. “Yes, you have. At least you recognize it.”

  “I think I reciprocate.”

  Hannah held her gaze. “Yes, you do.”

  “What does reciprocate mean?” Jack asked.

  “It means she cooks me a steak when I want one.”

  He frowned. “Well, I don’t want to reciprocate. I’d rather have a burger, I think.”

  Lindsey’s laughter bubbled out before she could stop it and Hannah splashed water at her.

  “Come on, buddy. Let’s go off the rope swing. It’s time you learned how to do a flip.”

  “Oh…cool!”

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Hannah leaned her head back into the water with a contented sigh. When Lindsey had suggested a lazy float trip down the river—probably their last one for summer—Hannah had been oddly disappointed she hadn’t offered the pond. The pond and skinny-dipping. But after yesterday’s encounter, perhaps skinny-dipping wasn’t the best option. Besides, floating on the river like they were, it would be a perfect time to talk. Neither of them could get away, could walk away. Whether that was a good idea or not, she wasn’t sure. But she felt they needed to talk. Ignoring what was happening wasn’t solving anything. The problem was, she had no idea how to begin. She took a deep breath. Might as well jump in with both feet and see what happened.

  She looked over at Lindsey, who was a few feet away from her. The dogs were on the bank, sniffing next to a cypress tree. The river was getting lower, the flow slowing down even more. She paddled over to Lindsey, holding on to her float, keeping them together. Lindsey looked at her expectantly.

  “Something’s happening to me,” she said. Probably not the greatest of lines, but it was a start.

  Lindsey raised her eyebrows but said nothing.

  “I feel like I have all these changes happening inside of me.” She met her eyes. “I don’t know what to do about it.”