Prairie Storm (Cowboys of The Flint Hills #4)
Page 20
A little shiver of warmth danced through her, reminding her just how long it had been since they’d made love.
Gunnar rolled his eyes good naturedly. “Get a room you two.”
“What? I can’t kiss my woman when I’m happy to see her?”
Gunnar turned to her. “Before my brother loses himself completely in your charms, we have a question for you.”
“All of us do,” Maddie Sinclaire chimed in as she bounced Henry in a sling.
Haley didn’t know Maddie that well, but she’d been impressed with the woman’s strength in the aftermath. Her eyes were tired and full of anguish, but she’d pitched in to help where she could. Handed Henry off to loving arms and helped serve food. Even offered to watch the children of volunteers. In fact, the Hansen clan as a whole had pulled together in the wake of Warren’s passing. Haley fought a jealous pang. She had grieved Mama June alone, and been sent to the next foster home as if nothing was wrong.
Maddie reached out and squeezed Haley’s arm. “We wanted you to be the first to know, since you were there for dad when none of us could be.” Maddie wiped an eye, and Haley resisted a lump of grief that welled up and stuck in her throat. “Dad had a little inheritance. Not much, but something for all of us,” she nodded at her cousins. “We decided Prairie needs its own clinic. I don’t know if it would have helped save dad, but we’ve needed it before. Like when I went into labor during the ice-storm at Christmas.”
“Or when Warren had his heart-attack,” Axel added. He laced his finger through Haley’s, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “You’re part of this family now too, so you should know before we announce it. We’re pooling our inheritance and will seek matching funds to build the Warren G. Hansen Memorial Clinic.”
Warmth flooded Haley as tears pricked at her eyes. “I think that’s a wonderful tribute to Warren,” she answered sincerely.
Family.
Did Axel know what it meant to her to hear those words? That she was part of a family? His family? She grinned up at Axel.
He kissed her temple and pulled her close. “Yes. You heard that right.”
Haley’s heart gave an extra kick as his words sunk in. She belonged to someone. To a family. Surely, she and Axel could figure out their future. That’s what family did, right?
But would they still want her when it was time for her to go back home? Were the Hansens the kind of people who could expand their sense of family to include her, even if she was down in Norman? She pushed down the nugget of doubt that still lurked at the edges of her consciousness. The piece of her that said she wasn’t worth the hassle. Yes, she and Axe were having a baby together, and at the very least, they would always share that. But she wanted… more. Hell, who was she kidding? She wanted everything. The prince, the carriage, and the happy ending. But there remained a three-hundred mile gulf between them that at present, seemed to be impassable. Family or not.
She pasted on a smile. That problem would have to wait a little bit longer. Axel kept his arm around her as the family filed in to the seats up front. When the crowd quieted, Dottie stepped up to the makeshift podium. On one side stood a large bouquet of flowers, on the other, a large picture of Warren laughing, holding his grandson, Henry.
Haley squeezed Axel’s hand with everything she had. If she started crying now, she’d lose it and ugly cry in front of the whole town. She’d cried enough. An entire reservoir’s worth of tears since the tornado. Sniffles and muffled cries carried across the gathering.
Dottie cleared her throat and looked down at the piece of paper she’d placed in front of her. Then she folded it up and stepped around the podium and offered it to Maddie. “Here, Sweetie Pie. Read this another time. I’m just gonna speak.” She looked up at the gathering and raised her voice.
“I never much stood on ceremony, and I’m not gonna start now. I’ve known Warren pretty much my whole life. Saw his ugly face pretty much every day, too.”
Laughter rolled through the crowd, and something eased in the room. “Now, I’m not gonna say this is easy, because although Warren was an ornery ole’ cuss, he was my friend.”
Dottie directed her attention to Maddie, her voice thickening. “And he loved you somethin’ fierce Maddie Jane. And little Henry, too. Heck, who’m I kidding? He probably loved Henry more.” More laughter tittered across the crowd. “That baby was the apple of his eye, and he was never prouder than on the day he was born. Except maybe the day you married Blake.” Dottie waved her hand. “Now, I know there was a little bit of excitement in the lead-up to you marrying Blake, but it tickled Warren to no end that the Hansens and Sinclaires had finally put their disagreements behind them and joined up. Like family.”
There it was again, that word. Haley’s breath caught in her throat.
Dottie looked around the room. “Family. Family meant everything to Warren. Prairie meant everything to Warren. So I’m not gonna stand here and waste my breath sayin’ nice things about Warren that you already know.” Dottie’s voice grew stronger. “I’ve been hearin’ a lot of chatter over the last week that I’ve found to be bothersome. Chatter about leavin’. Throwin’ in the towel. Putting Prairie in the rear-view mirror and never looking back, and I don’t like that.”
She scanned the crowd, and Haley could see her making eye contact with certain individuals. Some who nodded, some who squirmed and tried to avoid her sharp eyes. “Lemme tell you somethin’ about my friend Warren here,” she waved at his photo. “We all know that Warren died making sure that little Daxton was safe.” Dottie screwed her face up and took a breath, then let it out before continuing. “Now, I’m a mama, and I’d put my life on the line for my babies. Warren did what he did because he understood that every one of us in this town is family. Every. One. Of. Us,” she repeated.
“And is that how we’re going to treat our family? Say thanks to our family? By packin’ up our bags when the going gets tough and gettin’ outta Dodge? Hell. No.”
Maddie sniffled. Other voices murmured in agreement. Haley’s heart sank like a stone. Dottie was right. Family stayed. Family stuck it out for each other. Family didn’t run when the going got tough. She fought back a sob of despair.
How could Axel leave Prairie?
He couldn’t.
Not now. Not ever.
And she’d never ask him to. Yet how could she stay with no job prospects and an inability to work remotely? It wouldn’t be fair to burden Axel in that way – make him entirely responsible for the health and well-being of two more people, in addition to the workings of the ranch. She owed it to her child, their child, to not only continue her work, but to pull her own weight. Because wasn’t that family too? Making sure no one shouldered the burden alone?
As much as she’d hoped the universe might give her a pass just once in her life, let her have the tiniest measure of happiness, circumstance would yet again snatch away people she loved. Her stomach roiled.
“Lemme tell you what’s gonna happen to Prairie,” Dottie continued, steely determination entering her voice. “We’re gonna rebuild. We’re gonna thrive. My family’s been here since the eighteen-seventies. We’ve survived fire, depression, dust, drought, and now this. Sinclaires have been here even longer. You think they’re going anywhere?”
Through a film of unshed tears, Haley could see folks shaking their heads.
“I’m gonna rebuild the diner and make some much needed updates. Emmaline’s gonna rebuild her dress shop. Millie’s going to re-open the grocery here in another week or two. Anders is going to rebuild the Feed ’n Seed so you all don’t have to drive forty-five minutes to the next town. We’re gonna fix the school, and the Lutheran church, and the bank, and every other building and home that was taken from us in that storm. And we’re going to help each other doing it. We got three churches here in town, how many of you go?”
A fair number of hands raised. Dottie nodded, her eyes bright. “I don’t go near as often as I should, but let me remind you this. Weeping may last through the nig
ht. But joy comes in the morning. Now Prairie may not yet be done weeping. But our joy is coming.” She walked up the center aisle, looking at her friends and neighbors. “But only if we stay and work together. Are you with me?”
Haley twisted in her seat to follow Dottie. Heads nodded and murmurs rippled across the space. “Not good enough. Are. You. With. Me?”
This time, calls of ‘yes’ and ‘you bet’ and ‘not going anywhere’ could be heard. Dottie shook her head and returned to the front. “What if I told you that the Hansen gang is giving all their inheritance to build the Warren G. Hansen Memorial Clinic? Would that convince you? Prairie’s going to get its own clinic. How many times have we had to drive to Manhattan for emergency medical care? Or Wichita?” Grief flickered across Dottie’s face. “How many times over the years have we lost someone because emergency care was too far? Well no more. Are we going to rebuild?”
More yesses were called out.
“Still not good enough. Say it.” Dottie’s voice boomed. “You love Warren Hansen? You love any of the six other folks that died? You love Prairie? Then stay. Fight for her. Rebuild. Who’s with me?”
Spontaneous applause broke out, and this time the yesses were shouted. Axel gripped Haley’s hand, clearly moved.
“I will give a million dollars to help build the clinic,” Zack Forte’s voice reverberated across the arena.
Haley whipped around, looking for her boss, and spotted him toward the back, standing, hands on hips.
A collective gasp went up. A man next to Brodie Sinclaire stood. “I’ll give a million dollars too. And set up a trust to provide funds to anyone who needs help rebuilding.
Axel leaned in. “Mason Carter, friend of the Sinclaires. Good guy.”
And obviously filthy rich.
“And I’ll match whatever Carter throws in,” Forte added, clearly not to be outdone.
Applause broke out again, and people stood, clapping, hugging and crying. Dottie beamed and clasped her hands. When the group quieted again Dottie spoke. “I have nothin’ more to say folks. It’s time for a party.”
CHAPTER 30
Haley was pulling away. Axel could feel it. Feel it in the way she avoided his gaze, the way her eyes grew distant and sad when she thought no one was looking. Dread charged through him.
Goddammit, she was going to bolt.
He steeled himself. Not if he could help it.
He scanned the party and caught sight of her with Millie and Emmaline. She laughed, just then, at something one of the women had said, her face lighting. Something pulled tight within him. Twisted up and seized hard around his heart. She was so perfectly lovely, perfectly at ease, so perfect for him.
He jammed his hand into his pocket, fingers fiddling with the ring he’d been carrying around for three days. It hadn’t been easy, making an excuse to drive to Manhattan during cleanup. But then the opportunity had presented itself, and Axel had volunteered to make a run to purchase toys for the kids staying at the arena with gift cards people had dropped off. The ring was simple, a diamond solitaire on a white gold band. Their lives were complicated enough. He wanted his offering to be simple. Straightforward.
Axel wound his way through the tables filled with residents, barbecue, and most important – laughter. God knew, people needed to laugh right now. And if Uncle Warren’s funeral gave them that, good. He swallowed down a lump of grief that snuck up on him. He still couldn’t believe he’d been the last one of his family to see Warren alive. To see his crusty smile, hear his dry laugh, receive his quirky advice.
As they’d talked about Warren over the previous days, they’d discovered his penchant for giving strange, yet timely advice to the younger generation of Prairie. It seemed like everyone had a story about Warren’s ‘chats’ or his love of Dottie’s pie. Axel missed the old cuss with a fierceness that surprised him. He’d miss Warren every time they played poker, every time he heard Henry laugh. But he’d be around to make sure Henry knew about his grampy and what a hero Warren had been.
“Axel.” A hand grabbed his elbow, stopping him. He turned, surprised. Elaine Ryder looked up at him through big, mournful eyes. “I… I’ve been trying for days to figure out what to say.” She sniffed and blew out a breath. “I’m so, so very sorry for your loss.” Her voice caught and her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “And – and I’m so grateful that Dax is safe.” The tear leaked out her eye and rolled slowly down her cheek.
Heat raced up Axel’s neck and his eyelids pricked. He nodded, not sure what to say.
Elaine swiped at her eyes. “I- I don’t think I could survive if something happened to Dax. He’s such a sweet boy. My whole world.” She gave him a watery smile. “He- he never meant to hurt anyone. He was scared.” Her face contorted and Axel pulled her into his arms. What else could he do?
“I know,” he answered, his voice thick with the loss of it all. “But we’re going to be okay. And he is too. And we’ll help him. Okay?” He stepped back, still keeping his hands on her shoulders. “No one blames him, Elaine. We’re glad Dax is okay, too.”
She sagged in relief, nodding her understanding. “Thank you.”
Would this be him someday soon? Terrified to the point of paralysis for his child? Afraid to breathe, for fear they’d break? Is this what he had to look forward to as a parent?
Yes.
But also the love. He recognized the love in Elaine’s eyes. Had seen it in Haley’s when she pressed a hand to her belly when she thought he wasn’t watching. “Come visit, if you ever need to talk. And bring Dax, too. Door’s always open. Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s someone I need to find.” He gave Elaine’s shoulder a final encouraging squeeze and made a beeline for Haley.
The three women were giggling when Axe approached, his hand dropping to Haley’s shoulder. Millie looked at him, smirked, then dropped her gaze.
“Sorry. We were reliving the ambush,” Haley explained.
A laugh rumbled through him. “Glad to know I have staying power.” Sure, it had been a little embarrassing that they’d literally caught him with his pants down. But he’d more than earned a little payback, and you should only give as good as you were willing to get.
“In more ways than one,” Haley murmured under her breath.
Axel leaned down, suddenly nervous. “Walk with me?”
She nodded, pushing back from the table. “See you ladies.”
“Bunco tomorrow night?” Emmaline asked.
For a fraction of a second, Haley’s face broke down. But then her cheeks smoothed, a placid smile firmly in place. “I’ll see how it goes.”
Dammit.
She was planning on leaving.
Again, dread swirled through him. He’d just have to convince her to stay. He laced their fingers together, and led them back through the tables, all the way out into the yard. Haley gasped in delight as they stepped outside. The sky had been set ablaze with pinks and oranges, the surrounding hills bathed in a golden light. A poignantly beautiful reminder of everything he loved about his home. He led them down past the corral and through the trees to their bunkhouse.
Haley paused as his hand hit the doorknob. “Let’s stay outside. Watch the sunset.”
“Sure.” He turned and sat on the stoop, pulling her down to sit between his legs. She settled into him, resting her arms on his legs.
They sat quietly as the clouds changed slowly from coral to gold to purple and the light faded. She raised a hand. “Look.” A firefly winked and darted in front of them. “The first of the season. It’s an omen.”
Hopefully a good one.
“Axel… I…” Haley sighed deeply. “We need to talk.”
Everything in him stilled. Those words were never a good sign. He tensed and braced for the words he knew were coming.
“I’m leaving in the morning.” Her voice was small. Sad. “Forte asked if I would return with him to work on bringing the all data we collected online. And he needs my input on the next set of probes we develop. Ap
parently, I’m a good shot, and my probes gathered the most data.”
He shut his eyes as the pain he’d been expecting washed over him. After a moment he hugged her tightly, inhaling her scent as he buried his face in her silky, dark hair. “I know,” he murmured.
She swiveled, looking at him, eyes full of confusion. “You’re not mad?”
A bitter laugh ripped from his throat. “I’m a whole helluva lot of things. But no. Not mad.”
“What are you?”
He swallowed, searching for words. “Hurt, mostly. That you won’t stay. That I- I’m… not enough,” he admitted softly.
She stifled a sob, and cupped his cheek. “You are, Axe. Enough.”
“Then marry me,” he blurted out. “Make a life with me.”
“You know I would… in a heartbeat. But not here. You know there’s no work for me here. Half of my job requires time in a lab. And the lab, along with all our equipment is in Norman. My work requires colleagues to bounce ideas off of, or collaborate with. We’re not set up to work remotely year round.”
Her words stabbed at him. Poked holes in his heart where emotion leaked out in hot angry pools. “You can’t ask me to leave Prairie. Not now. Not when everything’s still a disaster. Not after Dottie gave that speech.”
She blinked several times. “I know,” she answered thickly. “I’d never in a million years ask you to leave. You know that. Your family is here. And your land. You have no idea how much it means to me that you think I’m family too. But I told you before, I won’t be an obligation. I won’t have you that way.”
“Then stay… please.” The last word came out in a desperate whisper.
“I can’t let you shoulder the financial burden of two more people. You’ve already said the ranch is running razor thin margins. And you know I’m not ranch wife material. I never have been.”
It gutted him to admit it, but she had a point. She was no Martha, and he loved her for it. They could make things work for a little while without her working, but ultimately, they’d be one disaster away from financial ruin, and that was no way to run a family business. Not with so many people depending on its success.