Lorna Seilstad - [Lake Manawa Summers 03]

by The Ride of Her Life

  Betrayal.

  Nick’s heart plunged.

  Lord, what have I done?

  36

  Every nerve pulled taut as Lilly watched the car carrying her son whiz around the roller coaster rails. Agonizing seconds flew by. Up and down. Around and around. Her head swam with dizziness, and she grabbed for the railing.

  Her son.

  Her baby.

  On that thing.

  Nick laid his hand on her shoulder. She jerked away. How could he have let Levi ride the roller coaster when he knew how she felt about it?

  “Lilly, he’ll be okay.”

  “You don’t know that,” she spat. “There are no guarantees.”

  The car rolled into the station, and Sean applied the brake. Levi jumped out and ran to her. She knelt and crushed him against her chest, holding him, drinking in his sweaty little boy scent and pressing kisses to his downy hair. She held him as long as he’d allow.

  At last he wriggled free. “Did you see me? I was flying.” Levi made a hilly motion with his hand. “It was sooooo much fun! Mama, you gotta try it.”

  She patted his head. “Levi, go sit on the bench down by the steps and wait for me.”

  “But, Mama, I want to go again. See, I’m big enough.”

  “Now, Levi.” Her tone left no room for argument.

  With his shoulders slumped, Levi trudged away.

  Lilly whirled toward Nick. Anger boiled inside her like a pot left on a hot stove. He’d put her son in danger. That was unforgivable. She glared at him. “I have one question. Why? Why did you let him do it?”

  Nick took her arm and propelled her to a more secluded spot. He crossed his arms over his chest. “I didn’t let him. I left him with Percy, and the boy must have taken him on the ride. Don’t blow this out of proportion. He’s fine.”

  “Why did you leave him with Percy? I thought you wanted to spend time with him.”

  “I had something I needed to take care of.” Nick glanced toward Ruby, who stood several yards away beside Mark.

  Lilly followed his line of sight, not missing the triumphant smile on the actress’s face. She wiggled her fingers in Lilly’s direction.

  “Her? You weren’t watching Levi because you were talking to Ruby?”

  “It’s not like that.” Nick held out his arms. “Maybe now isn’t the time to talk about this. Maybe we should discuss it later after you’ve calmed down.”

  “There won’t be a later.” Tears, hot and angry, filled Lilly’s eyes. “I can’t do this. I can’t trust you with my son. Levi could have been hurt.”

  “But he wasn’t.” Nick ran his hand down her arm.

  She pulled away. She stared into his blue eyes flashing with hurt and anger. “I can’t.”

  He shook his head and ran his hand through his hair. “This isn’t about letting Levi ride on a roller coaster. This isn’t even about us. This is about you. You don’t want to be hurt. But I’ll tell you something, Lilly. Life hurts sometimes.”

  “I know all about how much life hurts.” Tears fought their way down her cheeks, and she swiped them away.

  “This is the excuse you’ve been looking for so you can go back to your safe world—the one you control—without feeling guilty. But the truth is you’re afraid.”

  “Afraid of what? You?”

  “Everything.” His voice dropped low. “But most of all, you’re afraid we’ll all see you’re a coward.”

  “You insufferable, arrogant—” She stopped and clamped her lips together. She would not say another word.

  Getting involved with Nick Perrin had been a mistake—a mistake she wished she could erase as easily as chalk on a board.

  Drawing his fist back, Nick prepared to let the punch fly.

  He slammed his knuckles into his open palm. The collision stung. The pain almost felt good. It was certainly better than the frustration building inside him.

  Behind Percy, the roller coaster’s engine putted along as if nothing had happened. Wide-eyed, Percy looked as if he expected Nick’s next punch to land in his face. Still, Nick couldn’t muster any sympathy for him. Irresponsible boy. Why had Percy let Levi ride the roller coaster? Did he even realize the grief he’d caused Nick?

  Nick glared at him. “What in the blazes were you thinking?”

  Percy looked at the floor and shrugged. “You said to let the boy do what I would have wanted to do.”

  “I said to watch him. I trusted you to keep an eye on him.”

  Percy looked up, defiant. “And I never took my eyes off him. What harm was there in letting him ride the roller coaster? Other kids do it all the time.”

  “But Levi isn’t any other kid. He’s—” Nick swallowed the lump in his throat. “He’s Lilly’s son, and I know you heard me talking about how she wouldn’t let him ride.”

  “Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was a major concern.”

  “Well, you were wrong.” The pulse in Nick’s temple drummed an annoying beat, accusing him of being the truly guilty party. If only he’d ignored Ruby and tended to Levi himself. “Get out of here.” Nick turned his back on Percy and waved his hand in the air.

  “Are you firing me?”

  “No, but I don’t want to see your face right now.”

  Percy slammed the door to the motor shed so hard the building shook. Nick’s chest heaved. He ought to throttle that boy.

  He kicked a bucket and it clattered against the wall. The anger seething inside wasn’t all directed at the boy.

  Lilly. Her implications. Her doubts about him. Her lack of faith in him. Each thing seemed like another shot to his bruised heart.

  Or was it his bruised pride?

  He rubbed his throbbing temple. He didn’t need this. His life had been fine before Lilly Hart, and it would be fine without her too.

  “Jury, what say you?”

  Mark sat down at the back of the gallery, watching the conclusion of one of Claude Hart’s trials. His client, Ralph Veenstra, had been accused of assault with a deadly weapon, and after watching Mr. Hart deliver the closing argument, he’d not been surprised the jury returned twenty minutes later with a verdict.

  The jury foreman stood. “We find the defendant not guilty.”

  Ralph pumped Mr. Hart’s hand, thanking him over and over. Mark waited patiently for his employer to finish and met him in the hallway outside the courtroom.

  “Congratulations, sir.” Mark fell in step beside Mr. Hart, the heels of their shoes pounding out a beat on the courthouse’s polished hardwood floor.

  “Thank you.” He glanced at Mark. “Do you have news?”

  “Yes, sir, but perhaps we can discuss it someplace … less public.”

  “Good idea.”

  Mark followed Mr. Hart out of the courthouse and down the block to his law office. The older lawyer pressed his hand against the frosted glass panel on his office door and turned to Mark. “I hope you have good news.”

  “Excellent, in fact.”

  The two men entered, and Mark ran his hand along one of the walnut bookcases. “Our efforts have been successful. Nick and Lilly are no longer courting.”

  “Are you certain?” Mr. Hart sat down at his massive rolltop desk.

  “Yes. I witnessed their parting exchange myself.” Mark walked to the decanter set and poured himself a whiskey. “You no longer have any concerns.”

  “As long as Lilly still has my grandson, then I have concerns.” Mr. Hart stroked his snowy beard.

  “But you said you believed Lilly’s financial situation would eventually make her turn to you for assistance and acquiesce to your will for Levi. Did your son really not leave a will to provide for her?”

  Mr. Hart’s eyes darkened. “That’s something I won’t discuss with you.”

  Mark’s stomach instantly knotted. Clearly he’d hit a raw nerve. Something was wrong here. Lilly might be a former maid, but she deserved what her husband wanted her to have, and so did Levi. Did Claude Hart need control so badly he’d make t
hem all suffer until he got his way?

  Still, Mark couldn’t risk offending the powerful man. His whole career was on the line. “Sir, I apologize. I didn’t mean to infer you were being dishonest. I merely found it odd a lawyer—”

  Mr. Hart shot Mark a warning look. After several seconds, the older man pinched the bridge of his nose. “Well, your news is good, but it’s too late to stop my other plans.”

  “Other plans?”

  Mr. Hart gave a halfhearted laugh. “You didn’t believe I entrusted something as important as this solely to you.” He stood and went to his safe. With a twist of his hand, he opened it and removed an envelope. “I want you to go to the lake and find a man named Mr. Black.”

  “Where will I find him?”

  “Near the roller coaster.”

  “And do what?”

  “Give him this. It’s payment for a job I expect him to finish.”

  Mark stared at the envelope in Mr. Hart’s extended hand. Everything in him said not to take it, but what choice did he have? Finally, he accepted it.

  “You’re a smart young man. You already understand some things cannot be left to chance.” He laid a hand on Mark’s shoulder. “Keep this up and you’ll be a trial lawyer here in no time.”

  Mark swallowed the lump in his throat. What had he gotten himself into?

  Lilly punched the dough.

  A coward? He’d called her a coward?

  She turned the dough ball out onto the floured countertop and pressed it flat with the heels of her hands. Punishing the dough, she folded it and pushed down hard again and again.

  Why would he say that? She was no coward. She’d stood up to her in-laws. She’d gotten her son out of that house. She’d started a new life for herself.

  The dough seemed sticky, so she sprinkled in a little more flour and began to knead some more. Her mother had once said kneading dough had saved many a marriage. Lilly pressed hard into the spongy mixture. There wasn’t any marriage to save, but it sure felt good to take her anger out on something.

  “Lilly?” Marguerite slipped into the kitchen of the diner carrying a rubberized bag. “Are you ready to go?”

  “Go where?”

  “Swimming. Remember?” She pulled the stool to the counter and sat down. “Lilly, what’s wrong? It looks like you’ve been crying. Is Nick okay?”

  “Nick’s fine. Unless I decide to break the sixth commandment, in which case I can assure you he’d no longer be fine.”

  “I see.” Marguerite poured herself a glass of water and handed Lilly a dish towel. “You’re going to make your dough salty with those tears. Talk to me.”

  Lilly blotted her face and went back to kneading. “Maybe later.”

  “We’ll talk while we’re swimming.”

  “Marguerite, I’m not really in the mood.” After dividing the dough, Lilly plopped it into two glass pans and set it on the back of the stove to rise.

  “You, my friend, need a break. And you know you’re going to have to tell Emily and me what’s wrong sooner or later, so you might as well tell us both at the same time. Think about this outing as saving you time.”

  Lilly sighed and shook her head. Only Marguerite would think of that. Knowing her friend, she might as well give in and go. Marguerite always seemed to get what she wanted eventually.

  After making sure Eugenia and Nora had things covered, Lilly and Marguerite, along with their children, went to Emily’s cottage. Lilly quickly gathered their bathing costumes and hurried back outside to join her friends.

  “I’ll be back in an hour or so.” Emily kissed baby Katie then Carter goodbye.

  “Have a good time. Katie and I will be fine. We have packing to do.”

  Lilly’s heart lurched. “Packing?”

  “I was going to tell you later, but Carter and I have decided to return to traveling with the team. My aunt Ethel is improving, and Carter says we’ll be fine as long as we’re together.”

  “Both of you? And the baby?” Lilly asked as they started toward the lake.

  “Well, we weren’t planning on leaving her behind.” Emily’s lips curled. “But, Lilly, I want you to know I already spoke to my grandmother, and she told me to make it clear you’re free to stay here even after Carter and I leave.”

  “I’m not so sure I could do that.” She eyed Tate, Faith, and Levi up ahead. What would she and Levi do now?

  Emily waved her hand in the air. “Of course you can. Grandma insists.”

  “I’ll have to think about it.” They reached Lake Manawa’s shore, and after Marguerite admonished Tate to help Levi change in the men’s bathhouse, they hurried into the ladies’ bathhouse to put on their bathing costumes.

  It didn’t take Lilly long to slip out of her skirt and shirtwaist and into her dark blue bathing costume. Since she was already wearing her black wool stockings, she didn’t need to put those on. The square neck, tucked bodice, and flared skirt of her bathing costume showed more current trends than a lot of those donned by other women. Last season it had been one of her frivolous purchases from the meager allowance the Harts provided. She traced the yellow piping with her finger. Nick would have liked it.

  Standing in front of the mirror, she tied a large, sunny-yellow kerchief around her hair, securing the bow in the front. Marguerite emerged from the stall along with Faith. She smiled at Lilly. “I know I told you this before, but that is the cutest bathing costume I’ve ever seen.”

  “Thank you.”

  “What did Nick—” Marguerite stopped. “Sorry.”

  Lilly’s heart pinched, and tears pricked her eyes. Nick hadn’t seen her in the bathing costume. Until the last few days, the water hadn’t been warm enough to consider a swim.

  “What’s wrong?” Emily came out of her stall, adjusting her flowered swimming cap. “Did I miss something?”

  “Nick and Lilly are on the outs.”

  “Nick and I”—Lilly placed her hand on the door’s latch—“are over.”

  37

  Drenched and tired from frolicking, Marguerite sat on the warm beach. She dug her fingers into the deep, wet layers of sand. Worry wrapped its tendrils around her heart. Lilly refused to speak about what had happened with Nick, so how could she help if she didn’t know what was wrong?

  Emily sat down beside her. “Did you come up with a plan yet?”

  Out in the lake, Lilly held a prone Faith on her arm, trying to teach her to float. Marguerite smiled, remembering when Lilly had taught her to swim. “You know our Lilly. You can’t make her do anything.”

  “Or say anything.” Emily sighed. “I guess we’ll have to trust her to talk when she’s ready.”

  Lilly left the water and walked up the beach. Her steps stilled for a moment when she glanced in the direction of the Midway, and then she hurried to join them. She sank into the sand beside them.

  Emily placed a hand on her friend’s damp arm. “Tell us what happened.”

  “He let Levi ride the roller coaster.” Lilly thrust her fists into the sand.

  “Is that all?” Marguerite asked. “Men do a lot of things with their children a mother might not think is safe. Trip even took Tate out in the sailboat during a storm. He said he needed to learn what to do if one came up.”

  “Tate’s a lot older than Levi, and Tate is Trip’s child. Levi is mine.”

  “I see.” Marguerite crossed her arms.

  “It sounds like there’s more to the story.” Emily’s voice was gentle and filled with concern.

  Lilly pressed her lips together.

  Marguerite huffed. “Oh, good grief. Just tell us. We aren’t going to leave you alone until you do.”

  The advertisement in the newspaper was a godsend.

  Lilly clutched the paper in her hand and glanced at Marguerite walking beside her. Levi trailed behind them, looking for cicada skins. He’d already found a couple and delighted in showing them to his aunt Marguerite.

  The ad said the four-room house for sale was only a half mile from t
he lake. It would take every penny Lilly had saved, but she believed she could afford it. They might have to do with sleeping on the floor for a month until she could buy beds, but they’d manage.

  She’d been glad Marguerite readily agreed to go with her to see it. The last couple of days had taken their toll on Lilly, and she hadn’t wanted to do any convincing. Every movement right now made her feel like she was walking through a wet field of cockleburs. Her sandpapery eyes drooped, still thick from last night’s crying, and her heart was as heavy as Eugenia’s oatmeal.

  Her friends had been supportive of her decision to stop seeing Nick, but she sensed Marguerite had an earful of opinion ready to deliver this morning.

  “Lilly, are you sure this is what you want?” Marguerite snagged a bushy green foxtail from the weeds along the road and stripped it with her fingers.

  “I don’t know. I haven’t seen the house yet.”

  “That’s not what I mean.” Marguerite glanced at her. “Are you certain you and Nick can’t try again? Buying a house closes that door quite soundly.”

  “I didn’t tell you the worst of what he said.”

  “Oh?”

  “He called me a coward.”

  Marguerite’s eyebrows peaked. “I hope he ducked when he said it.”

  Lilly almost smiled.

  “Now, do you promise not to hit me?” Marguerite pushed a branch out of the way.

  “Yes.”

  “Is he right?”

  Lilly stopped. “You think I’m a coward too?”

  “I think you’re afraid, and I don’t blame you, but I worry you’re letting your fear control your choices. Building all these walls isn’t going to keep you from getting hurt. It’s only going to keep you from being loved.”

  They started walking again. “Can I hit you now?”

  Marguerite shrugged. “If you have to.”

  “I’ll forfeit.” Lilly looked at her dearest friend. That hadn’t been easy for Marguerite to say. But was she right? Was fear controlling Lilly?

  Marguerite shielded her eyes from the sun. “If that’s the house, then you may be living at Emily’s a while longer.”

  Lilly saw a crude “For Sale” sign nailed to a tree in the front yard. Shoving an overgrown bush out of the way, she walked to the front porch, making sure to skip over the second step, which was rotted through. “Levi, you stay out here with Aunt Marguerite until I see what the inside looks like.”