Running errands with David was an entirely different experience. It felt domestic, like we were just every other ordinary couple on the planet. Somehow, what should have felt mundane instead felt right. Having never been part of a serious couple, I was somewhat surprised.
Which brought me to an interesting question that I had been trying to hold at bay. Were we a couple? It certainly felt as if we were, at least to me. But David was so closed off that I often wondered how he felt. He wasn’t very forthcoming, and I knew that going in. He was guarded, for whatever reason, and played things very close to his chest. But every once in a while, he would do things that would show me what he felt, like what happened in the hallway, or his request of me to stay with him.
Truth be told, the prospect of staying with him again had me giddy. Not because I thought we were having sex. That idea was the furthest from my mind. No, the very fact that he had asked. That, in itself, spoke volumes to me, and helped to answer the question.
Yes, we were a couple, albeit a tentative one.
We stopped at the pharmacy first because David needed a prescription refilled. He told me that he wouldn’t be long, and I waited in the car. Then we went to the grocery store, and I had to remind him that he didn’t need to worry about how much he needed to get because he wasn’t taking the bus.
My fingers itched to touch him as he pushed the cart up and down the aisles. I wanted to hold his hand, claim him as mine, and show the world that we were a thing. But I didn’t. I had to restrain myself, which I found it difficult. The feeling that I had earlier blossomed further with the simple act of grocery shopping. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but it was true.
I tossed a few things into the cart of my own. If I was staying with him for the night, the least I could do was treat him to a nice, home-cooked meal.
After grocery shopping, we went back to his place and put the groceries away, then headed to the hospital to visit with Lucas. Ryan was there by the time we arrived.
Lucas looked good, which I was thankful for. The treatments he had undergone were rigorous, and there had been many times, within the past month, that he slept through our visits. Ryan looked happier than I had seen him in a long time, and I could only guess that it had to do with Lucas’s condition.
We chatted a bit, and I noticed that David stayed by my side. Despite the conversation that he and Ryan had earlier in the day, I could see that he was slightly uncomfortable. Ryan picked up on that too, and tried to pull him into the conversation.
“I never got a chance to thank you for helping Adam decorate Lucas’s room. It looks good. I doubt Adam would have been able to do this on his own.”
David looked sheepish, and I could tell he wasn’t used to those kinds of compliments. “I didn’t do much. Just helped him pick out some posters.”
“Don’t short change yourself, David. My brother wouldn’t know the difference between a Spider-Man and a Superman to save his soul.”
“He’s right, you know,” I chimed in, trying to add weight to what Ryan was attempting to do.
“Well, I knew that Spidey was Lucas’s favorite, so the rest was a no-brainer.”
“Lucas was too young to see the Tobey Maguire movies in the theater.”
“And I hated the Andrew Garfield ones,” Lucas piped up.
David’s gaze turned to Lucas. “You did? Why?”
“Because Peter Parker wasn’t cool. He didn’t ride a skateboard. He was a nerd who never got the girl.”
“Have you seen the Maguire ones?”
I glanced at Ryan as Lucas and David were talking, and he flashed me a grin. David had been set up. I could see it, and I was perfectly fine with it. Anything it took to make him more comfortable and pull him further out of his shell.
“Yeah, I saw ’em on Blu-ray.”
“What about the Donner Cut of Superman?”
Lucas’s eyes glowed. “No.”
“I have it. If you want to borrow it, you can.”
Lucas glanced at Ryan as if asking for permission, and Ryan shrugged his shoulders. “Sure. But not until you’re out of here. We can do a marathon.”
David turned to Ryan. “When’s he being released?”
“As long as the test results come back okay, should be next week.”
“Just in time for Halloween.” That came from Lucas.
“Halloween’s always been his favorite holiday,” Ryan said.
“It has. Glad I’ll be outta here. I just feel bad for the kids that are stuck in here for it.”
“How come?”
“Dude, the candy. They can’t trick or treat or dress up.”
Ryan jumped in. “Lucas, you haven’t dressed up in a couple of years.”
“I know. But there are little kids in here. And they won’t get to.”
I glanced in David’s direction and saw his eyebrows knit together, like he was deep in thought. “David?”
He looked at me, then at Ryan, and finally, his gaze fell on Lucas. “I have an idea. If the hospital will go for it, that is.”
Three heads turned to him, and I saw him tense slightly. I reached out and grasped his shoulder, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “What is it?”
He looked at me, and I could see the thanks in his eyes. As he spoke, his gaze never left my face, but he spoke to the room. “If they can’t go out for Halloween, Halloween can come to them.”
“Meaning?”
I could almost see the wheels turning in his head as he spoke. Never removing his focus from me, he said, “We get a couple of local vendors to sponsor it. Costumes, bags, and candy. We get the hospital involved. Maybe let them tell the parents. Any parent that wants to can get their child a costume and dress them up for the day. Then people dress up and bring the bags of candy in for the kids.”
He stopped speaking and his ears turned pink. The room grew quiet. From the corner of my eye, I saw Ryan look over to Lucas, and they both turned to David. “That’s a fantastic idea, David,” Ryan said.
A smile broke out across David’s face. He was literally beaming. His eyes never left mine. I could see the nerves, but I was grateful that he saw me as a safe place, someone he could look to as he spoke and not be afraid of judgement. I felt pride, and that damned “something else” swell even further. Regardless of whatever shit hand he had been dealt, he had no problem thinking about others. That one word started bouncing through my head on repeat, like a record with a needle stuck on it. Mine.
He was mine, and I was so damned proud.
We went back to David’s after our visit with Lucas. He walked in first, and I followed, toeing off our shoes, and dropping my backpack onto the end of the couch.
“Want anything?” he asked, opening the refrigerator and peering in.
I approached him from behind and ran my hand up his back. He leaned into it like a cat being scratched. Sliding my hand around to his front, I pulled him to me and wrapped both arms around him. “Just to be here with you.”
He tilted his head back, leaning it against my shoulder, and I turned to kiss his earlobe.
“That was impressive.”
“What was?” he asked.
“What you suggested at the hospital. I think it’s a great idea.”
He turned in my arms and draped his arms over my shoulders. “You really think so?”
“I do.” I leaned in and kissed him. “I’m not sure how you came up with it, but it was brilliant.”
“I just know that…well, kids deserve to have fun. That’s what Halloween is supposed to be about. Dressing up and being someone else, even if it’s only for a night.”
I wanted to ask him if he had ever wanted to be someone else, but I held the question in. I already knew the answer.
“Hospitals are no place for a kid to be, especially on a holiday. I…I wanted…”
He seemed to be speaking from some memory, and I had that urge again to protect him. “Wanted what?”
David pulled away. Crossing into the living-room, he
sat heavily onto the couch. I immediately missed the contact, and went to sit next to him. He seemed lost in that memory, and I had no clue how to pull him out of it. I took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze, hoping the physical contact would be enough. He looked at me, and his eyes seemed to be far away and lost. Sadness crept over his features, and anger began to build in my gut. Not at him, but at whatever or whoever had stolen his confidence.
“I wanted to do something nice for them. Something that I think they’d enjoy and appreciate. I doubt it’ll work, though.”
“Hey. Don’t sell yourself short. You know you won’t be doing it alone, right?”
He huffed out a breath. “I can’t hardly expect anyone else to do it. It was my idea after all.”
“Listen, Ryan and I have spent so much time at the hospital these last few weeks, we’ve gotten to know some of the staff really well. I’m sure that between me and him, we can convince them to help.”
“You two have enough on your plate with Lucas.”
“Who do you think this is for? I know you came up with it because of him.”
“Mostly,” he mumbled.
“Mostly?”
He waved the question away. Clearly, that was a topic he didn’t want to get into, so I didn’t press. His walls were just beginning to come down, and I knew that bulldozing my way through would send him running. He had to take them down his way and in his time.
“Popcorn.”
His head jerked at the quick change in subject. “Huh?”
“We need popcorn for the marathon. Can’t binge on Buffy without it.”
“I don’t think I have any.”
I grinned at him. “Did I never tell you I was a Boy Scout?”
“I have no idea what the hell that means.”
“Didn’t think you would. The Boy Scout motto is ‘Come Prepared.’”
“Still not sure how that relates to popcorn.”
“I picked some up while we were at the store. Microwavable, sure, but it’ll do.”
I stood up from the couch and leaned down to kiss him again.
“I can do it,” he said.
“Naw, I’ve got this. Get the DVD player set up, and I’ll be back in a jiffy.”
Realizing what I said, I barked out a laugh. “Jiffy. Get it?”
“Nope.”
With a sigh, I explained, “Jiffy is a brand of popcorn. It comes in its own pan, and you cook it on the stove.”
“Nope, still not gettin’ it. But you know what I do get?”
“Uh…no.”
“You’re a dork.”
There was levity in his words, and I was glad for it. If I had to be the butt of the joke to bring that out, then so be it.
After the popcorn was popped, I grabbed two cans of pop from the refrigerator and a bowl. Pouring the popcorn into the bowl, I carried everything back to the couch. David sprawled out on the couch, laying his head in my lap, and setting the bowl within arm’s reach of me near his chest.
We sat like that for hours, watching episode after episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. We barely spoke, but it was a comfortable silence. I was struck again at how domestic it felt, sitting there watching television with his head propped in my lap. After a while, the popcorn was gone, and I began idly running my fingers through his hair. I craved the physical sensation of him.
Once the final episode of the first disk was done, he rolled his head up to look at me. “Thank you.”
I know the confusion that I felt was on my face. “For?”
“This. Just…this.” He let out a sigh.
“Baby, anytime.”
The word just slipped out. I realized that I had never called anyone, let alone David, “baby.” But it felt right, natural, like a term of endearment that he deserved.
His eyes darkened as he rolled onto his stomach. His lips curled into a grin that looked almost predatory, and his hand traced the contour of my thigh, from knee to crotch. My breath hitched in my chest because I knew, instinctively, what was about to happen. My heart raced, blood pounding in my ears. My thoughts coalesced into one stream, make this good for him.
David palmed me through my pants, and my blood ran south, engorging my cock until I was fully hard. That damn grin turned into a full-on smile, pride washing over him, knowing he was the one responsible for my current state.
He propped himself up on his free elbow and tilted his head up, while his hand still played with my bulge through my pants. I met him halfway, leaning into his lips.
“You don’t have to do this,” I whispered.
“I want to do this. I want to make you feel how you make me feel.”
And then he kissed me, raw and hot and needy, and my God I didn’t know he had it in him. His tongue seemed to be everywhere, exploring every crevice of my mouth, lips mashed so tightly against mine that I thought we would be joined there forever.
He knelt beside me, giving himself a better angle, and brought his hand to the back of my head, holding me against him while his other hand found the buckle of my belt which he released with surprising ease.
“Wait.” He stopped, confusion evident in his eyes. “Not here.”
I stood from the couch and extended my hand, silently asking him to join me. He took it and stood as well. I led him to the bed and stood beside it. He stood in front of me, breath coming in heavy waves. I cupped his face, forcing him to look me in the eye. “Do you have any idea what you do to me? I want to give you the world and protect you from it. I want you to have everything that you’ve never had, and I want to be the one to give it to you.”
His eyes widened at my declaration, and that unnamed thing that had been blooming in my gut finally flowered. I knew what it was, I knew its name, and so badly wanted to share it with him.
I let my thumbs slide across the points of his jaw and meet at his chin. Then, I traced the contours of his neck until I reached the collar of his button-down. Never breaking eye contact with him, I popped the first button, the second button, the third button, all the while silently pleading with him to trust me. I would never put him in a position that he was uncomfortable with, I would never push him beyond his limits, I would never take advantage of him.
Finally, his unbuttoned shirt hung open. His breath came quick and ragged. His hands shook slightly, and I wasn’t sure if it was from nerves or excitement or both.
I took a step back and drank him in. Blue eyes that, as cliché as it may sound, I got lost in frequently. Thin build with pale skin. Small, dark nipples. A patch of hair in the middle of his chest, and then a dark trail of wispy thin hair that went from the bottom of his navel and disappeared into the waistband of his jeans. His pants bulged prominently in the center, and my mouth literally began to water.
With one finger, I traced a line down the center of his chest to the top of his pants, hooking a finger into the waistband and tugged him to me again.
I kissed him with the fierceness of a starving man eating his last meal. All the while, I worked at his belt, unbuckling it and unsnapping his jeans. I let them go, and they dropped to the floor, his erection bouncing from within the confines of his boxer briefs. A small, wet spot had formed on the front, and I playfully swiped my thumb across it, taking what moisture I could. I held that thumb to my mouth, and flicked my tongue out to lick it.
David gasped.
He tossed me onto my back on the bed and made short work of removing my pants and underwear while I pulled my T-shirt over my head. He stood before me, and, on instinct, I spread my legs so that each knee was on either side of him. I sat up so that I was eye level with his chest, and licked at his right nipple. Another small gasp escaped him, and he caught me by my hair, pressing me to his skin. I licked, nipped, and sucked at the nipple and my hands roamed the front of his underwear, palming his erection and stroking it through the fabric.
Finally, I couldn’t take anymore, and I pulled his boxer briefs down in one motion. His cock bounced free, nestled in a thatch of pubes the same color
as the hair on his head. A small, clear string of pre-cum dangled from the tip, and I lapped it up, the taste exploding on my tongue.
I took him into my mouth and bobbed, forcing him to the back of my throat, and holding him there. He let out a soft whine, and threaded his fingers through my hair, bunching the strands into his fists, and pulling them tight. Not hard enough to hurt, just enough to hold me in place. His hips began to undulate, fucking my mouth, and forcing his cock to the back of my throat, again and again, all the while, I pulled at his low-hanging balls, taking each one in hand and pulling it, massaging it.
Without warning, he pulled himself from my mouth and looked down at me, with a wicked grin. He gently pushed me onto my back again, and climbed onto the bed. Knee walking until his bobbing cock was directly over my mouth. “I wanna try something.”
He flipped, bringing his mouth to within inches of my cock while leaving himself within reach of me, his shirt billowing over us like a cape.
“I’ve never done this before. I might be bad,” he cautioned.
“You won’t be, I have faith.”
And with that, he took me. His teeth scraped for just a moment, and I winced but didn’t cry out. He was learning, and I knew that. I was sure I’d made mistakes my first time out of the gate as well. He held me at the base and licked the head of my cock, swirling his tongue around. Slowly, almost painfully so, he lowered his head, taking me as far as the hand he had wrapped around me allowed. It took everything in my power to control myself, to not buck into him and bury myself within the confines of his damp heat. He found a rhythm, bobbing his head just as I had done to him, dragging his tongue along my length until it rested against my head, then he would sink back down.
Looking In Page 13
