Behind the Badge

by Susan Sleeman

  He’d told himself to treat her just like one of his men and not to let his awareness of her as a woman muddy the waters. This shouldn’t be such a complicated thing. Especially when he knew better than to lead her on. No woman deserved to get involved with him after the way he’d failed his ex.

  “It might take a while,” Garber said. “Most of the guys are processing the kids from the party.”

  “Just get it here as soon as you can.” Russ disconnected and contemplated staying in the garage. Not a good idea, because Sydney would come looking for him.

  He went inside and found her sitting in the family room, sipping a glass of water.

  She held it up. “You want anything?”

  He shook his head and took a seat as far away from her as possible.

  “I’ve been thinking about what you said.” She shifted on the sofa. “You were right. I have been jumping down Nikki’s throat lately and not listening to her. I’ll have to work on how I react from now on.”

  “Good.” He let that warm feeling from helping slide over him like a soft blanket.

  She set her glass on the table. “Not that there’s any excuse for how I’ve been treating her, but when I caught her drinking I lost it. Our mother was a mean drunk—” she shuddered “—and I don’t want Nikki to follow in her footsteps, so I overreacted.”

  All hope that had raised his spirits earlier flooded out. She’d said drunk with more disgust than he’d ever heard in the word. It felt like a slap in the face.

  Sure, his ex had called him a drunk many times, with great passion, but not like this. So much for thinking he deserved a second chance at a normal life. He’d wrecked his life, and second chances didn’t come easy.

  Had she said something wrong, or did Russ go hot and cold like this all the time? If so, life around him would never be dull. Not that she was planning life around him. Especially after his comment in the garage about never being able to raise a teenager like she was doing. He was just like all the other guys her age—didn’t want a teen to tie them down.

  She wanted to be disappointed in him, but honestly, she could understand why a guy wouldn’t want the extra responsibility. She loved her sister, but there were days when she’d be happy to live like other women her age.

  Still, she could imagine one day staring across the table at his compelling eyes. Eyes that had locked on hers in the garage, kicking up her pulse. Blue eyes that narrowed as they roamed the room, as if searching for a way out.

  “You okay?” she asked.

  “Tired.”

  “I hear you.” She regretted that after all they’d shared tonight they were heading toward inconsequential small talk.

  He stood. “I can wait for my ride on the porch.”

  “That’s not necessary.”

  “Nikki wants to talk to you,” he said.

  “She won’t be going to bed anytime soon.”

  “Still, I should go.” He headed to the door.

  “Well, then, thanks again for talking to Nikki. I hope she didn’t tell you any deep, dark family secrets.” She grinned to lighten the mood but when he didn’t return it, she took a sip of water.

  His face turned even more serious. “It’s really none of my business, but did you lose your service weapon?”

  She choked on her water and coughed until her throat cleared.

  “I’ll take that to mean you did.”

  She guzzled more water and fought for calm. She wanted to trust the caring expression he’d trained on her earlier, to confide in him about her missing gun, but she couldn’t tell him before her sergeant. As her boss, he deserved a heads-up before her carelessness made it onto the town’s gossip chain.

  Anyway, she still hoped a more thorough search than the quick one she’d just done in her car would produce the weapon.

  “Sydney?” Russ’s tone grew more insistent.

  When her phone chimed a text, she nearly praised God aloud for the timely interruption. “Excuse me a minute.” She called up the message.

  Your sister may have gotten home safe tonight, Deputy, but tomorrow’s another day. Give back what you took or both of you will pay.

  “What is it?” Russ asked. “What’s wrong?”

  “It’s from him again.” She handed the phone to Russ and fought for control over the fear spearing her stomach. “Why is he doing this? I didn’t take anything.”

  Russ’s expression darkened. “More pressing for me at the moment is the fact that he knows Nikki’s home.”

  Sydney had been so busy thinking about the item she’d supposedly taken from Dixon’s house and what the man who wanted it could do to her sister that she hadn’t questioned how he knew Nikki’s whereabouts.

  Her heart sank. “He’s still watching us.”

  “It’s very likely. You need to show these messages to Nikki so she sees the full magnitude of the situation.”

  “I can’t… I’ve already scared her. This’ll terrify her even more.”

  “She needs to know this guy means business.” He clenched his jaw. “We can’t have her taking off again.”

  “I need some time to think about the best way to handle this, Russ. I can’t decide just like that.” She snapped her fingers.

  “Fine. You think on it, but while you’re doing that, I’m arranging for a protection detail for tonight. And think about moving to a safe house tomorrow.”

  “I don’t think that’s necessary,” she protested.

  “The killer’s messages are clear, Syd. He’s not about to stop until he gets what he wants.” He planted his feet and trained a steely gaze on her.

  She didn’t know what to do. She couldn’t think with his eyes drilling into her like this. “Make the arrangements—for an outside detail only. I don’t want anyone in the house until I decide what to tell Nikki.”

  He headed for the door then spun, facing her with a grave expression. “I get that you’re trying not to scare Nikki, but you need to prepare her for what could happen if this escalates.”

  Numb, Sydney watched him leave. What would she say to Nikki? How did she tell her kid sister that she might have to go into hiding because a killer had threatened her life?

  SIX

  The next morning, Sydney laid her Bible on the table and stretched. After a restless night, her morning devotion had given her hope and reminded her that God was in control of their lives.

  “Just remember that, Sydney,” she said as she crossed the room. “Even if this day doesn’t go according to plan.”

  She peeked through the blinds as she’d periodically done throughout the night when she couldn’t sleep from worrying about the killer and over losing her gun. A few times, she’d actually been thankful to have the distraction of the missing gun to keep her mind off the killer.

  After Russ left last night, she’d thoroughly searched the interior of her car and confirmed there’d been no forced entry of the vehicle. So if someone stole the gun while she was on the hill, then the thief had used a slim jim, leaving no evidence behind. But if they were after weapons, why hadn’t they taken her shotgun and her backup gun, too? It was almost as if whoever took it knew she’d get in trouble for losing her service weapon and had done it more for that reason than to possess a gun.

  So who could that be? Was there someone in her department who wanted her gone because she was a woman? She’d had her share of issues over being female, but she didn’t think things had reached that level. However, she couldn’t dismiss the possibility that maybe she’d overlooked something. She’d have to be on alert for another deputy who seemed bitter toward her. Maybe once she told Krueger about the missing gun, he’d shed some light on the problem.

  She sighed and peered at Russ’s cruiser. At least she had a bed to toss and turn in. He only had a car. He’d arrived sometime between two and three in the morning, parked in the driveway and spelled his other officer. She’d thought about telling him he could come in and bunk on the sofa, but after the way she’d responded to him last nig
ht, she didn’t think that was such a good idea.

  Now guilt from making him stay out in the cold had her marching out the door to invite him to breakfast.

  The gray clouds had split wide this morning, letting the sun’s warm rays bring relief from the drizzly rain. Still the grass and driveway glistened with moisture. She was careful not to slip on mossy patches courtesy of a few months of steady rain.

  She glanced up to find Russ had climbed from his car and leaned on the open door in a relaxed stance. When their eyes met, a fluttery sensation in her stomach brought all the feelings she had had for him as a teen flooding back. And yet they weren’t the same. More intense, actually.

  “Everything okay?” His voice was warm and sleepy as his gaze drifted lazily over her.

  She forced her mind off his perusal. “I’m sorry I was so closed-minded last night. Would you like to come in for some breakfast? We can talk about what to do next.”

  “Sounds good.” He closed his car door.

  Acutely aware that he was following her, she led the way into her house.

  “Coffee?” she asked outside the kitchen.

  “That would be great.” He took a seat in the same chair as last night and stretched, drawing his uniform shirt tight across his wide chest.

  As she went into the kitchen to prepare a tray, she remembered the feeling of security he’d provided last night when he’d held her. The warmth of his body easing out the cold. She’d been alone for so long, carrying the responsibility of raising Nikki, that it would be so great to find a man to share the burden.

  “Enough daydreaming, Sydney,” she whispered. “No man wants that kind of responsibility.”

  Finishing the tray, she went back to the dining area and hoped he was in the mood to listen. A night in a cold car wasn’t likely in her favor. She found him stretching and bending as if sleeping in the cold had kinked his muscles.

  “I’m really sorry you had to spend the night outside.” She set a cup of coffee in front of him.

  “Not a problem. That’s my job.” He picked up the mug and took a few careful sips of the steaming liquid. “This will keep me awake until I can grab a quick shower and another gallon of coffee.”

  He offered a crooked grin, so like that of the boy she’d hoped would smile at her this way. She didn’t know how to respond and simply dropped onto the chair while pointing at blueberry bagels.

  He split one open.

  “Any new developments on the case overnight?” She took a long sip, savoring the nutty flavor of her fresh-ground coffee.

  He glanced up. The teenager’s grin was long gone. “A few. We confirmed the weapon used was a nine-millimeter. Not that this will help a lot. With so many people owning nines these days, that really doesn’t narrow things down.” He set the mug down and traced the rim with his forefinger. “Baker confirmed the two texts came from the same phone number. Phone company identified it as a prepaid. We’re tracking down registration details, but I’m not holding out hope it’ll be legit.”

  “So what happens next?”

  “Garber will look at your pictures. We’ll interview Dixon’s boss and coworkers.”

  “I’m looking forward to talking to the foreman,” she said. “It might just be a coincidence that Dixon worked on the town-house construction site, but I don’t think so.”

  He nodded his agreement and took another sip of coffee.

  This seemed like a perfect time to broach the subject of a protective detail. She set down her cup and took a deep breath. “Before we get going I wanted to talk about plans for our protection.”

  “I haven’t changed my mind about the detail if that’s what you’re hoping.”

  “Not exactly. Just thinking we could compromise.”

  He lifted an eyebrow and sat back. “I’m listening.”

  “Since I’ll be spending the day with you anyway, Nikki is really the only one who needs someone with her. I showed her the text messages and she agreed to let an officer accompany her to school.” Sydney smiled. “She said it might even be cool to have her own personal bodyguard.”

  “That works for me.”

  “There’s one more thing…”

  He groaned and leaned forward again. “I knew this was too easy.”

  “I have to see Krueger before my day starts. I’ll be happy to let you follow me to the office if you want, but I don’t want you sitting in the parking lot waiting for me.”

  “You’ll have another deputy accompany you on the drive to my office?” he asked.

  “If that’s the only way you’ll agree to this, then, yes.”

  He met her gaze, his softening. “You may think I’m insensitive, Syd, but I get that you don’t want to look weak around your coworkers. I’ve worked with enough women in this business to know you’re held to higher standards.” His eyes narrowed. “But first and foremost, I want to make sure you’re safe. And this guy has proven that he knows what he’s doing.”

  “I appreciate all you’re doing, Russ, really I do.” She let her eyes remain glued to his and hoped her sincerity shone through. “I worked so hard to be respected as a fellow officer. Even if I’m a rookie with a lot to learn, I don’t want this incident to cause a setback.”

  “I can understand that.” He lifted the cup to his lips.

  She didn’t see a smirk or any other evidence that he was humoring her, but only time would tell. For now, they’d made an uneasy peace. Hopefully nothing would happen today to take it away.

  Sydney stood in front of Krueger in his office. Before the door closed behind her, he’d told her that he didn’t like how she’d wormed her way onto the investigative team. She didn’t correct him, but did update him on the investigation and listened as he gave her instructions to report in on a regular basis.

  And with the sergeant already miffed at her, she then had to tell him about losing the gun. She’d expected him to erupt like a volcano, but he sat behind his pristine desk, long jaw clenched and eyes narrowed in hard little slits.

  His intense scrutiny made her squirm but she refused to fall apart. Last night she’d acted like a helpless baby, but she’d reclaimed the strength that had abandoned her at the sight of Carl Dixon’s body. Her talk with Russ gave her the confidence to withstand Sarge’s glare. She’d wait him out.

  Just as she was ready to say something, he shoved his chair back and stood, towering over her. “This why you weren’t carrying last night?”

  “No!” She paused to let her shrill tone return to normal. “I left the gun in my backpack like I told you.”

  He trained a glare on her that would make an innocent person admit to a crime. “It’s one thing to lose a gun. Another to cover it up.”

  Her temper spiked at his insinuation. “I’m not covering anything up. The gun was in my backpack.”

  “Fine, but if I find out you’ve been playing me, I’ll have your job.” His glare diminished a bit.

  Hoping this was over, she started backing away.

  “Hold on. I’m not done with you yet.” He tilted his bald head to the side. “You do realize I’ll have to write you up for this?”

  “No.” She clenched her hands. “I mean, no, sir, I wasn’t certain you’d have to do that, but I understand your position.”

  “See that you do understand how serious this is. Don’t let it happen again. And don’t go blabbing about this to Chief Morgan.” He exhaled. “Maybe we can keep this mark on our department’s integrity from spreading through the community.”

  “Yes, sir,” she said as a rush of heat flooded her face. She hated that her actions tarnished the team’s solid reputation.

  “I’ll authorize a new duty weapon for you, but you better search a little harder for the missing one. How you can lose a gun is beyond me.” He jerked his head toward the door. “Now get outta here and see that you don’t lose this one.”

  Face still flaming, she bolted for the door. Once out of view, she stopped to gain her composure before picking up her new duty we
apon.

  She wasn’t surprised Sarge wanted to keep this quiet. There was a lot of competition between the sheriff’s department and Logan Lake P.D. Letting Russ find out about the missing gun could make Sarge look bad, and if she’d learned anything in her first year on the job, it was not to let the big guy down. Too bad she couldn’t seem to accomplish that goal this week.

  Russ held open the front door. He’d had enough of City Council Chairman Fred Windsor offering advice on how to handle this case. The man had hired Russ and he, along with the council, served as Russ’s supervisor, but Windsor didn’t have a clue as to the intricacies of running a murder investigation. Which Russ had told the man for the past thirty minutes.

  “See that you keep me informed, Chief,” Windsor commanded. “We can’t have our citizens afraid to leave their homes.”

  “Will do.” Russ pushed the door open wider to encourage the man to leave.

  “You have my cell number,” Windsor said. “If you need to consult on the murder, don’t be too proud to use it.” Windsor slapped his meaty palm into Russ’s hand, then exited the building.

  The councilman paused and turned, but before he said anything else, Russ walked away. He wound his way through the squad room that was so different from the busy Portland office. Logan Lake employed only a handful of officers, forcing each one to wear many hats. If this investigation didn’t end quickly, he’d have to request additional help from county. That idea sat as well with him as the thought of consulting with Windsor.

  At Garber’s desk, Russ waited while the officer finished his phone call with the president of the local dirt-bike club. After breakfast, Sydney had given him her phone’s memory card and he’d printed out photos. The first three digits of the dirt bike’s license plate were clear as a bell, confirming this bike as the one their killer rode. But with only three digits, a DMV search would return thousands of vehicles and take forever to run down.

  Garber recognized the cycle as a BMW, and since very few people in the area could afford a twenty-thousand-dollar bike, they would focus on the bike itself.