“So, she just gave her to you?” I repeated, the words coming out clipped.
“Have you met your grandma?” he asked, the words all a breathless laugh. “She said she’d give me a couple days to think about it, but that Ron was already there, getting all the paperwork ready. And she’d rather have it taken care of before she had to start dinner.”
“Of course she did,” I mumbled, rubbing at my temple with my free hand before asking, “What’d you say?”
“I left.” His chest pitched with strained amusement. “I went for a run to clear my head and then came back and asked what I had to do.”
I watched him for a long time before the question swirling around in my mind finally slipped free. “Why?”
“I love that girl, Emma,” he said softly. “I’d do anything for her.”
“But . . .” My stare fell to my lap as a forced breath broke free. “You didn’t have to—you shouldn’t have let Lala push you into that. Nora isn’t your responsibility.”
“She is.”
“But she wasn’t,” I argued as my gaze drifted back to his. “You didn’t have to do this.”
“I know,” he said easily.
My head shook as I continued struggling to wrap my head around this. “I don’t understand—you have full custody?” When Reed dipped his head in a nod, I asked, “But she lives with Lala.”
“Nora doesn’t know.”
My brows lifted in surprise.
“Lala didn’t want to unnecessarily upset her, she wanted to keep Nora’s life how it was, and I agreed. So, this is all in place in the event something bad happens. Hopefully, nothing will, and it’s just something we can explain to her when she’s older.”
“But what about doctors and school and things like that? If you’re her guardian—”
“I’ve already signed everything I need to,” he answered with a shrug. “Lala can take her to and from school and to checkups. If she has to go to the hospital, I’ll be there. But I’d probably be there anyway.” A heavy sigh left him when I lowered myself onto the pillows. After turning off the lamp, he rested his head near mine. “You’re mad.”
“I’m not.”
“You’re shutting down.”
“I’m not trying to,” I assured him and reached out to thread my fingers through his. “Just thinking.”
His eyes searched mine in the dark, questioning and prompting.
“I’m grateful that Nora has a legal guardian who isn’t my mom,” I said, voice soft as I tried to get out my jumbled thoughts. “I’m shocked . . . I don’t think that’s a big enough word. But I can’t believe a twenty-nine-year-old man would willingly take custody of a six-year-old, who he isn’t even related to.”
“She was four at the time,” he mumbled and breathed out a laugh that was all a rough whisper when I pushed against his stomach.
“And I guess there’s just that part of me that rebels against the idea of a man having custody of her,” I said, the words full of horrors and shame. “Every instinct in me wants to keep her from men, and yet . . .”
“I will protect her with my life,” Reed vowed gravely.
“I know,” I said confidently. “I know you would never hurt her. It’s just a deep-rooted reaction . . . some horrors are hard to shake.”
He pressed his forehead to mine as he lifted our joined hands to his chest. “Hopefully, her life will continue as it is. Living with Lala while I come and go simply as one of her favorite people. But if it ever comes down to it, she’ll never be displaced. She’ll be protected. She’ll be safe. All right?”
I nodded. “Thank you.”
For telling me.
For loving my family.
For protecting us all.
He brushed his mouth across mine in response, leaving me wrapped up in all that comfort and security as I finally let my eyes close.
“When are you coming back?” I heard Nora ask the next day as I slipped back into the room from showering and dressing. Reed had coaxed me out of bed early by promising a sunrise and then had tried to kill me by taking me for the hardest run of my life on the beach.
Reed’s stare shifted to me, slowly devouring me before he glanced back to his screen. “Tonight or tomorrow.” He cleared his throat and gave her one of those easy smiles. “So, I’ll probably see you tomorrow.”
“Are you bringing that one back with you?”
Reed’s expression shifted to a mixture of patience and reprimand. “You can’t keep calling her that, Nora. Her name’s Emma, and she’s your sister.”
“I just wanted to know if you’re bringing her back because she left me too.”
“We didn’t leave you. I talked to you about this—my family is here. We came to see them for a couple days.”
Nora was silent for a while, and I pressed up against the wall. Content to let them finish their conversation. “Do you love her more than you love me?”
“I love her differently,” he said with a soft shake of his head. “I don’t love either of you more.”
“Can I tell you a secret?” she asked, her voice getting louder even though she was clearly trying to whisper.
Reed’s eyes lit with amusement as he waited.
“I think she loves you differently too.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, because she’s been extra sad lately, and I heard my Lala say so,” Nora whispered, then continued in a normal tone. “Is she your girlfriend now?”
His gaze drifted to me again, studying me with a fierce intensity that made my heart race. “She’s something,” he finally answered.
Lala’s voice sounded from far away, and Nora sighed. “My Lala said I have to go get ready for church now.”
“Then you better listen to her so you can get all fancy.”
“The fanciest,” Nora said on an excited gasp. “I have to go!” The pounding of her feet could be heard before she yelled, “Bye, my Reed!” and then the phone was being shuffled around.
“That child, I swear,” Lala said with an affectionate laugh.
“Your head hurt?” Reed asked, eyebrows pulling together as he gestured to his temple.
“You and your obsessive worrying. Can’t even let an old woman rub at her head,” she mumbled, pure annoyance.
“Just making sure you’re all right.”
“I’m just fine,” she said with a scoff. “Now go on and get. Have yourself a good time and make sure my granddaughter’s feeding you.”
“He’s eating, Lala,” I called out from my spot, my eyes rolling.
“Don’t you go sassing me on the Lord’s day,” she shot back.
I just rolled my eyes again, forcing a laugh from Reed.
“Bye, Lala,” he said before ending the call, dropping his phone to the bed with a weighted sigh and dragging a hand through his hair.
“What’s wrong?”
He blew out another slow breath and stood, offering me a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I haven’t missed a Sunday with Nora in a couple years.”
Surprise pulsed through me as I got a glimpse of just how much Nora meant to him.
It was one thing to hear him say it—words could always be just that: words. But it was another to witness the impact their being apart had on Reed.
“We can go,” I offered softly. “Be back in time for dinner, and you can read to her then.”
He was already shaking his head before I finished.
“After the years apart, I need this weekend with my family. And this is good for Nora. She needs to have things change up on her every now and then to push her out of her comfort zone.”
“But you don’t like it,” I said in understanding.
A huff left him, all saddened amusement. “No. No, I don’t.” A crease formed between his eyebrows when he stopped in front of me. “You’re surprised by that.”
I slid my hand into his when he offered it, shoulders lifting. “I just don’t think I was paying attention before.”
A grunt rumb
led in his chest. “Think you’ve been shielding and pushing,” he claimed as he leaned in, keeping his lips an inch from my own.
“You just have me all figured out, don’t you?”
The corner of his mouth twitched as his eyes searched mine. “I don’t think I’ll ever have you figured out, but that’s one of the things I love about you.” He captured my lips for a slow, teasing kiss that had my belly dipping with heat and my head getting all kinds of light as I pulled him closer only to have him reverse our positions so he was against the wall. Bringing me closer and gripping me as if he never wanted to let go.
A groan rolled up his throat and did amazing things to my body when I pressed the tips of my fingers beneath his shirt, tracing the ridges of his muscled stomach down to the top of the shorts he was wearing.
“Bed,” he said against the kiss, the word a plea and a demand and a question.
Always a question. Always an invitation.
Always my choice.
But before I could respond in any way or even move in that direction, someone slapped against the bedroom door and yelled, “Breakfast!”
“Fuck off,” Reed called out before capturing my lips with his again in a kiss that instantly had my knees going weak. All fierce possession and need and desire.
The drumming on the door resumed even louder as the feminine voice said, “You never see your family. Make babies when you’re back home!”
I staggered away from Reed so quickly that I nearly tripped over myself.
He hissed a curse as he caught and steadied me, annoyance coloring his expression when the drumming turned into incessant banging. “Jesus, Kennedy, we get it,” he said as he swung the door open to her wicked grin. “Fuck you.”
She placed a hand on her chest and clicked her tongue, feigning adoration. “Well, isn’t that just the sweetest? Good morning to you too.” Her other hand shot out, and Reed’s entire body jolted as Kennedy yelled, “Tag!” over Reed’s curses and then took off running.
I stood there for a few seconds after Reed had scrambled after her, shouting threats throughout the house, unable to wrap my head around what had just gone down in front of me or the noise I’d heard.
But by the time I found them and their family in the kitchen, Mason was laughing, Kash was trying to mediate between Reed and Liam, and Reed had Kennedy in a chokehold as she struggled to get away.
My blood turned to ice and my body swayed as frigid fingers trailed down my spine, breaking every lock I had on the memories that haunted me.
“She can get out of it,” my dad said, trying to reason with Liam.
“I know she can,” he bit out, “but why the hell does he even have her in one, and why is he saying he’s going to kill her?”
“She—fuck,” I yelled just as another jolt of electricity hit me, seizing my muscles. “Fucking drop it.”
Uncle Mason started laughing even louder, and soon, my dad joined in.
Scrubbing a hand over his face, Dad gestured to where I had my sister in a chokehold but spoke to Liam. “I’d say she deserves it.”
“Drop it,” I demanded through gritted teeth, my breaths sharp and heavy. “Drop it.”
“I’ll knock you the fuck out if you put my wife to sleep,” Liam said in a threatening tone.
Kennedy continued struggling and trying to twist in my hold, intent on breaking free.
“What is going on?” Mom asked when she and my aunt came in, weighed down with bags of food, looking equally shocked and worried and annoyed.
“She keeps tasing him,” my uncle said, smiling as if it were the funniest thing in the world.
Mom’s expression deadpanned. “Kennedy, drop the taser right now.”
“God damnit,” I snapped when she hit me again. Every muscle locking up for a few seconds before I was able to relax them.
“Let her go,” Liam said when I tightened my arms around her neck, words all a dark warning as he stepped closer.
Just as Kennedy started trying to twist again, I knocked out her knee and shoved her forward, grabbing the taser from her loosened grip when she tried to steady herself as she staggered away.
Her laughter filled the kitchen as she bent at the waist, trying to drag in air. “I could’ve gotten out,” she said, smile wide and mischievous when she slanted her head to the side.
“Bullshit,” I said irritably, then held up the taser. “What the hell?”
She straightened, hands on her hips as she struggled to catch her breath. “Um . . . the last time we played tag, I seem to remember you using a metal meat mallet.” She gave me a look as if I should’ve remembered.
I watched her, brows lifting as if she’d lost her mind. “Kennedy, we were kids. I can’t even remember when that was.”
“That isn’t my fault. That mallet hurt like a bitch. I had a horrifically epic bruise that I had to hide from Mom for a week because of it.”
Mom lifted her hands and turned to Dad. “Wait, me? Did you know about their extreme tag?”
Dad looked at Uncle Mason and then to the floor, fighting a smile and choking on a laugh.
“Logan Kash Ryan,” she said, all shock and frustration. “A meat mallet?”
Dad just shrugged and turned to her. “I didn’t know about that one.”
“In Reed’s defense, I think Kira used Dad’s expandable ASP right before that,” Kennedy said as if she were helping the situation.
Dad pointed to her. “I may have given Kira that.” When Mom looked like she was going to start yelling, he tried to laugh it off. “They were playing tag!”
“That is not playing tag.” She gestured to me. “That is not playing tag,” she said and then released a heavy sigh. “Poor Emma probably thinks we’re insane.”
“I’ve warned her,” I mumbled, then pointed at Kennedy with the taser. “I’m getting you back.”
“Reed.”
I looked at my dad to see both him and Mason looking at something behind me. The way they’d straightened and sobered, staring ahead as if they were being careful about the way they were even breathing, had every sense heightening and my heart rate slowing. But then I turned, and my stomach dropped when I saw her.
All ice and shields as she stood there, tall and still, face utterly unreadable except for the demons dancing in her eyes.
And I knew . . . I knew in an instant what I’d done.
What she was seeing. What I’d brought back for her.
“Emma,” I whispered as I started closing the distance between us. Gauging her reaction the closer I came, my chest aching at the subtle way she shifted from me when I was within a few feet of her. “Emma, I’m sorry.”
“Why?”
“Because I can see what this is doing to you,” I said, voice soft as I led her into the living room and further from the kitchen.
“I’m fine.”
My jaw flexed at the lie. “Emma—”
“Are you okay?” she asked, stopping me from continuing.
“You can’t even look at me. No, I’m not okay.”
Her hazel eyes shifted to me, a gut-wrenching mixture of horror and numbness filling them as she forced herself to hold my stare.
“I’m not whatever you’re seeing.”
Her body sagged the slightest bit.
“Emma, I am not those men.”
“I know,” she whispered, the words sounding pained as they scraped up her throat.
When I held my hand out to her, she rocked forward and fell into my chest instead. Head pressed to my shoulder and a stuttered breath leaving her when I wrapped my arms around her.
And I was floored.
By that moment and her trust. By the changes in her as she slipped off the shield for me. For us.
“She was trying to get away,” she said, soft and shamed.
I brushed the tips of my fingers up and down her back in a soothing trail. “She could’ve tapped out, Emma. It wasn’t like that—I would never hurt her.”
“I know.” A shudder rolled th
rough her body. “And I know it’s just how your family is—I watched all of you together yesterday. This just . . .”
“Brought things back,” I offered when she didn’t go on.
She didn’t respond, but the deep sigh that left her when she leaned away was answer enough.
“Emma, I’m sorry.”
“Stop . . . please stop.” She gave me a look as if she was desperately trying to ignore whatever nightmares were slowly destroying her mind, and it tore at my soul. “I know you aren’t them, Reed.” Her stare darted over me. “Are you okay?”
“I don’t know,” I said honestly.
“Physically.”
I pressed my hand to the small of her back, pulling her closer as my head dipped in a delayed nod because that was the least of my worries. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“Reed, they found her,” my dad said, voice closing in on where we stood.
Anticipation and a hint of worry pounded through my veins before I narrowed in on the crease forming between Emma’s brows as she looked from him to me.
“Found who?”
“Shit,” I hissed, hand sliding to her waist as I twisted to see my dad. Holding my hand up for him to wait, I focused on Emma. “I didn’t get a chance to talk to you because of the whole taser thing. But when you were in the shower, I asked my dad to see if one of their guys could try finding your mom.”
Her expression fell before going utterly, heartbreakingly blank.
“I can’t do that,” I hurried to explain. “I can get in trouble if I just go looking up someone for no reason. Dad and Uncle Mason have people who can do this—people they trust implicitly.”
“You asked them to find my mom,” she said, voice a clear warning that every shield was about to slip into place.
And I was fucking terrified that I’d made a grave mistake. At the same time . . . “Emma, Lala and I are constantly worried she’s going to come back. You were worried. It’d help if we knew where she was and had someone watching to see if she starts making her way back to us.”
Lie to Me Page 34
