Endless Winter (Guardians of The Light)

by J Armitage

  March 21st

  Sarah has been acting odd in the last few days. It seems she wants to tell me something but clams up when I try to talk to her. Something is definitely going on though. She says she is making me a special meal tonight so perhaps that is when she will tell me what’s going on.

  March 21st (Evening)

  Wow! Wonderful news. Sarah is pregnant. I’m over the moon but feel at odds at the situation. None of my kind have gone on to have a healthy child. Of course they were all women. I don’t know of any of the men having children with human partners. Perhaps I am the first. I pray that Sarah will be ok carrying my child. I love her so much, correction, I love them so much.

  March 22nd

  I’m still in shock over the news. I woke up this morning with a huge grin on my face. So far Sarah has not had any symptoms, Morning sickness is yet to come but I do believe she is glowing. Not in our sense of course but there is a radiance there. I wonder if our child will look like her or if he or she will inherit my damned white hair and black eyes. I pray the baby will look like his or her mother and not suffer from this curse. I learnt to control my peculiar little affliction many hundreds of years ago. Keeping around people has helped me so that I do not think on it anymore but how can a newborn be expected to do the same? I have visions of the midwife getting an electric shock when she delivers him or her. What a calamity that would be.

  Anais smiled. Her father had got his wish. Her hair and eyes were the exact shade of her mothers. She’d not thought of all the things her father had to worry about but she did stifle a giggle at the image of her shocking the midwife. She read on:

  Of course I have to worry about the birth. Sarah cannot go into a hospital to give birth. If everything runs smoothly then there should not be a problem but if the baby needs its blood testing for any reason then that will be the end for all the Custor Lux. Sarah understands my concerns and has agreed to give birth at The Manor. She loves being there. She spends half the time chatting with Astrid in the kitchen and the other half playing chess with Andrew on that wonderful chessboard of his. She’ll be getting better than me at this rate!

  Anais reread the last line again. So her mother did know about her father. She thought that finding out for sure would make her feel angry but she was too fascinated by her own history to feel too much. She wished she’d pushed the point on bringing the whole box of journals now. She made a note to go get them as soon as possible. She flicked through a few more pages until she found a bit about The Manor.

  May 1st

  Morning sickness is full on now. Poor Sarah can’t even be around food at the moment. Just the smell is making her feel sick. She has survived the last week or so on crackers, potatoes and peas. It’s the oddest meal but it’s the only thing she can keep down. I’ve joined her in her new menu out of a sense of solidarity but when she has gone to bed I must confess to going out for fish and chips or curry. Of course I clean my teeth well when I get home so she doesn’t know I’m cheating.

  I’ve been thinking about the birth again. Now that Sarah is starting to show a bit it’s becoming all too real. She is much braver than me and tells me that she’ll be fine and that women have been giving birth for millions of years. I know this is true but she will be the first to give birth to one of my kind. She has already got past the three month mark which was the first hurdle to cross. My good friends Astrid, Ava and Audsley have fallen at this hurdle many times and lost countless babies. I’ve seen how heart-breaking it can be and I don’t know how they can bear it. I’m already completely in love with my little one and he or she is only the size of a bean.

  I called Aldric today to tell him our news and ask him if we could stay in the manor for the birth. Of course it took me half an hour of chatting with a very excited Astrid before she would even pass the phone over to Aldric. Aldric, told me that he would get acquainted with the medical side of childbirth and get the surgery prepared for any eventuality. Astrid would help also. I feel a little less nervous now. Aldric and Astrid make quite a team and there is nothing they don’t know about medicine. Sarah and Bean will be in good hands.

  May 2nd

  Sarah finally seems to have got over her morning sickness and requested Worcester sauce on her porridge this morning. It looked and smelled horrible but she yummed it up and asked for more. I’ve heard that pregnant women crave weird foods but this was truly disgusting. I’m not sure how I feel about having to make it every morning. This is one part of her new diet that I won’t be following!

  I got very excited phone calls from everyone this morning including two from America. Arcadia called me from some Hollywood party so I could barely hear her over the noise but I got the gist of it, that she’s happy for us. Audsley called from her home in Las Vegas. Honestly, Did The Light infect the Custor women with some need for bright lights and showy locations? She was very excited about the news and invited us all over for a holiday. She called it vacation. I think she forgets she’s English sometimes with her American vernacular.

  Anais flicked through a few more pages when she heard the door open. It was Aethelu returning from her talk with Alex. She was holding a pizza cut into slices. Anais was going to put the journal down when something caught her eye and she carried on reading.

  May 10th

  I received a letter this morning which was most peculiar. It simply read ‘I know about the baby’ and was signed Jago. I was about to throw it in the bin but the name sparked something in my mind. I’d heard it before but it took me a good few hours to remember where from. It finally came to me. Jago was Aldric’s partner. I’ve not heard his name for six hundred years. I decided against calling Aldric about it, perplexed as I am. It is probably a funny joke of someone’s. Of course, the letter went straight in the bin.

  Aethelu joined Anais on the bed and started to tell her about Alex.

  “He’s ok. He understands why you said what he did and he’s not upset with you. He really liked the idea of being daddy to the little squirts. By the way, sorry I was so long. I got pizza. I thought you might like to eat in here away from the talky twins in there. I do love them but they don’t half go on!”

  Anais knew she was talking about Audsley and Ava and not Alex and Rafe. She was glad that Alex was ok. She would go and talk to him herself tomorrow. In the meantime she beckoned Aethelu over to her side of the bed.

  “Here, what do you make of this? It’s my father’s journal for the year my mother was pregnant with me.”

  Aethelu quickly read the entry for May tenth and then looked in amazement at Anais.

  “Jago knew about you even then?”

  “I guess so. It seems he’s been threatening us longer than we thought.”

  “It’s not a threat though is it? He just said ‘I know about the baby’.” Aethelu got under the duvet as she spoke.

  “Well no, it’s not a direct threat but it’s kinda creepy don’t you think? It’s hardly a note of congratulations.”

  “Does it say any more about him?”

  “I don’t know. I’ve not read any further.”

  She skipped ahead again.

  June 6th

  Another letter from Jago. This one says that he’s watching us. I don’t really know what to make of it. The implication is that he’s threatening us but there seems to be no reason to it. I checked the envelope. It was posted from York so he at least is telling the truth about being nearby. I’ll keep this one, just in case I need it for evidence

  The next mention was less than a month later.

  June 19th

  Yet another letter from Jago, Also posted from York. Sarah picked it up from the mat but I recognised the handwriting on the envelope and snatched it off her before she could read it. I realised that they were addressed to me only and not to Sarah or to both of us. That at least is some consolation to me. This one actually threatened harm to the baby. I’ve taken them to the police who say they will look into it. I don’t expect they will be able to do much seeing as they�
��ve only got a couple of letters to go on.

  July 1st

  This is getting ridiculous. Jago’s latest letter has threatened both my life and that of the baby outright. The police have now got this letter as well but they have told me that they are getting nowhere on the case. Apparently there is nothing they can do unless Jago actually hurts one of us. Surely it’s too late by that stage? I’m actually beginning to feel nervous about Sarah’s safety. I’ve not told her about Jago. I don’t want to worry her but I can tell she’s beginning to suspect something is wrong. I’ve taken to walking with her to work and picking her up afterward. I’m trying to pass it off as being a devoted dad but she’s not stupid.

  August 18th

  I’ve had another three letters, death threats. The police investigation is going nowhere and I’m at the end of my tether. I’ve still not told Sarah. I’ve not told anyone at the manor either. It seems pointless to worry them but if this continues I will have to tell someone.

  August 25th

  I’m writing this journal thirty thousand feet above the Atlantic Ocean. I got home from the university yesterday to find the house broken into. Of course it wasn’t hard to guess who had done it. I knew Sarah was safe at work so I went into the house to check. There was blood everywhere. He’d killed Sarah’s cat and smeared the walls with its blood.

  I went straight to Sarah’s work and took her to a nearby hotel for the night. I told her what had been going on and that I wanted to leave the UK, at least until the baby had been born. Thankfully she agreed with me. I called Arcadia and asked if we could stay with her in Los Angeles for a few months. She was more than happy to let us although more than a little confused. I told her that we wanted a new life in a new country. She seemed to buy it. I see no reason in telling her the truth. I don’t want to worry anyone else. The only other person I’ve told is Andrew. He agreed to go to the house and pack our stuff up and send it on to us.

  Anais and Aethelu looked at each other.

  “Andrew knew! Why didn’t he say something?”

  “I don’t know. Perhaps he forgot?” Even as Anais spoke she knew that couldn’t be the case.

  “It’s not likely is it? I think we should go speak to him.” Aethelu made to get off the bed.

  “No, not tonight, it’s getting late. We’ll both see him about it tomorrow. I want to see what else happened with my father.”

  November 11th

  I’ve just fallen in love. Nothing could have prepared me for how wonderful I feel right now. Sarah gave birth to our wonderful little angel three hours ago. Sarah was a trooper. She knew that she couldn’t go to a hospital so she had a home birth with no pain relief. She’s taking a well-earned rest while I look after the baby. We’ve kept the tradition of naming her with an A. I wanted to name her Anna, after all she was the one for whom the tradition began. Sarah liked the name Nessa after one of her grandmothers. In the end we compromised and put them both together. Annessa is a bit of a mouthful so we shortened it to Anais. It suits her somehow. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such perfection. Her eyes are blue which the midwife tells me all babies eyes start out like. As long as they are not black then I’m happy. She seems to have taken after her mother hair wise too. There’s not much but the few wisps that are there are dark. She seems so inquisitive. Only three hours old and already she’s holding my gaze. The midwife says that her eyesight won’t be so great for a few weeks but I swear she’s watching me intently as I write this. I can already tell she’s going to be one smart cookie!

  I have no idea if she has any of The Light in her at all. I’ve turned all the lights off in the room to check but I couldn’t see her. Perhaps she will be a perfectly normal human being (albeit a gorgeous and intelligent one!) I can’t guess what the future will hold for her or how long it will be. I know that she is safe and happy now. I haven’t received a single letter from Jago since we moved to LA all those months back. Perhaps he doesn’t know how to find us or perhaps he’s given up the idea of hurting us. Either way I’m glad we made the move.

  Arcadia told me yesterday that she was thinking of moving to France. She says she can do all her movie deals just as well over there and that she’s bored with Hollywood. She’s giving us her house here, called it a baby present. Honestly she is so generous I don’t know how we will ever repay her.

  My job at UCLA is going very well and thank goodness with another mouth to feed. Sarah is thinking about doing a course on stage and screen make up as soon as she’s ready. I don’t think it will be for a while though. I doubt she’ll be able to leave our little Bean with a nanny for a long time and I don’t blame her. I can’t stop looking at her myself. In fact I’m going to end my journal for the day. It’s way past daddy cuddle time!

  CHAPTER TWENTY TWO

  Anais was amazed. She’d been totally wrong about her parent’s decision to move to the US. She’d got a lot more than she’d bargained for when she picked up that journal.

  “What do you think?” Aethelu was just as shocked as she was judging by the expression on her face.

  “It looks like Jago has had a grudge longer than we knew. We should tell Aldric about this.”

  “Yeah but let’s speak to Andrew first. He usually has breakfast early. We can catch him then.”

  Anais looked at the clock. It was nearly midnight. So much for plenty of rest! She quickly changed into her pyjamas and switched off the light.

  A loud beeping sound woke her the next morning. At first she thought a fire alarm was going off somewhere before she realised Aethelu had set the alarm on her phone the night before.

  Aethelu was already half dressed by the time Anais figured out how to stop the alarm.

  “It’s 6.30,” Aethelu said “Andrew usually eats at Seven in the dining room.

  Anais dragged herself out of bed and had a quick shower before getting dressed for the day.

  The clock read 6.55 by the time both girls made their way across the courtyard.

  They found Andrew and Judith in the kitchen. Andrew was cooking breakfast for them both by the look of it. Judith looked up from a morning paper and smiled as they entered.

  “Good morning.” Judith took a sip of her coffee.

  “Hi Judith.” Anais nodded her head. “Andrew. I was hoping to have a word with you about my father.”

  “Yes?” Andrew turned over an egg and smiled at her.

  “Well, it’s about why he moved to America.”

  “Ah, I see. Judith, why don’t you take your paper up to the dining room so you can read in peace and I’ll have your breakfast up to you in a jiffy?”

  “Ok, my love.” She stood up and kissed Andrew lovingly before she headed up the spiral staircase, paper tucked under her arm and coffee in hand.

  “Right” said Andrew. “What is it you want to know?”

  Aethelu took Judith’s recently vacated seat at the table. Anais stood where she was.

  “I picked up a journal of my father’s from storage yesterday. It was from the year my parents moved abroad.”

  “Mmm,” Andrew didn’t look at her, instead he flipped the bacon under the grill.

  “It said Jago sent him threatening letters. He killed his cat.”

  “Really?” Andrew looked surprised. He turned down the heat on the stove and turned his attention to her. “What else did it say?”

  “Well, it said that you packed up my parent’s house and that he told you about Jago. Why didn’t you tell us?”

  “He never mentioned Jago to me!”

  Aethelu spoke up. She had Alistair’s journal opened in front of her. She read verbatim “The only other person I’ve told is Andrew. He agreed to go to the house and pack our stuff up and send it on to us.”

  “Yes, yes. I remember packing up the house for them. It was in a right mess. Furniture upturned everywhere. Everything slashed. Now that you remember it I do recall cleaning up the blood of the cat. Alistair had already disposed of the body. I got everything sent out to America with the exce
ption of the broken furniture which I threw away.”

  Both Anais and Aethelu looked at him, waiting for him to continue.

  “He never mentioned Jago. He just told me that he’d been broken into and that he was worried for Sarah and the baby so he was moving to America. I assumed it was a burglary of some sort. He asked me not to mention it to the rest of the Guardians as he didn’t want to worry them. I kept my promise. This is the first I’ve spoken about it in nearly 20 years. I can’t believe he didn’t tell me it was Jago. I suppose he had his reasons.”

  “It looks as though Jago has had a vendetta for much longer than we thought. We are planning to tell Aldric as soon as he gets up.”

  “Are you sure it’s necessary? It was a long time ago.” Andrew arranged the food over two plates.

  “Of course it’s necessary! The more information we have on Jago the better chance we have of getting him,” Aethelu answered him forcefully.

  “I suppose you are right,” said Andrew picking up both of the plates. “I believe Aldric is already awake and working in the surgery if you need him. Now if you’ll excuse me, my breakfast is going cold.” He made his way up the spiral staircase.

  “Well that’s a dead end. I was hoping he’d be able to give us a clue of some sort as to Jago’s whereabouts.” Anais sat down next to Aethelu.

  “What could he really tell us though? It was a long time ago.”

  “We already have a bit of a clue from my father’s journals anyway.”

  “Do we?”

  “Yeah. If you remember the letters we’ve been receiving recently, apart from the one that was hand delivered, they’ve arrived from all over the world. We know that from the post marks. My father said that his letters all arrived from the York district.”