The Love He Craves (The Love She Craves: Selling Her Soul to Declan Book 2)

by Jenkins, Gemma

  Her body became unnaturally still, as if she had stopped breathing. He pulled her closer. “I do love you,” she said softly.

  He pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her head and inhaled the scent of his conditioner. “So why?”

  He had to wait half a minute for her to answer.

  “You make me feel bad about myself.”

  “No,” he said, as if his denial would somehow change the way she felt. “I don’t understand, Nyxie.”

  The limply curled hands under her chin tightened into loose fists as if she needed to find the strength in herself to say what was on her mind.

  “When I quit school, I was proud of the way I was able to support Cody. When the girls came to live with me, I was happy to give up my lunch so they could eat it for supper. But you make me feel like I’m just a loser dropout, and the things I did, didn’t matter or they weren’t good enough.” She managed to keep the warble out of her voice and was glad he couldn’t see the water filling her eyes.

  He rested his forehead on the back of her head. “You don’t know how much it kills me that I made you feel that way. I can appreciate the sacrifices you made. I know, short of going into the system, that you had little choice. Are you sure part of the reason isn’t because you’re afraid your kids won’t love you if they aren’t dependent upon you and your sacrifices?”

  Even lying down, he could feel the way her body slumped with resignation. “In some ways,” she said. Her voice sounded fragile in that way that made his testosterone surge, and made him want to both protect her and fuck her. “And I’m worried that you’ll spoil them like you spoil me with expensive gifts, and that will make them love you more than they love me. I’m also scared that you will punish them the way you punish me. They are only kids. They’re messy and loud. Sometimes they fight with each other and talk back. I worry that you’ll treat them the way your father treated me.”

  He moved away from her and gently rolled her onto her back to see her in the dim light coming out of the bathroom. The little night light barely cast enough light to see the outline of her face, but it caught on the glistening water in her eyes.

  “Maybe it would help if we eased into this a bit,” Declan said, propping up his head on his hand and brushing strands of her black hair from her brow. “I think we should do what we were planning before we got married. You and the kids move into the B-side. I’ll stay in A until I’m finished with residency. We can install French doors between the living rooms, and maybe another door between the mudrooms, and open up the ground floor. If I’m home sleeping during the day, we can close off my side from yours.

  “As for the parenting—I don’t know yet. I’d like to think I’d be more like my grandparents than my parents. But I’m not going to spank your kids.”

  Nyxie would have liked to have pointed out Coach Stryker never hit her, but that didn’t make her less afraid of the man.

  “Do you promise you won’t hit them?” she asked and searched his face as he turned and nodded. “Would you check with me before you spend money on them? They don’t need computers or game consoles.”

  “Oops,” he said chuckling. “I asked my mom if they still had my old game system. I thought it would help Cody pass the time until he can get around better.”

  A small huff of air escaped her lips and she shook her head slightly. “You should’ve asked me first.”

  “I’m not spending any money on it and they’re mostly kids’ games. We can go through them and remove the violent ones.”

  Nyxie sighed. “That’s the way it starts, isn’t it? The next thing you know, they’re mindless zombies, throwing temper tantrums because you asked them to turn it off.”

  Declan ran his thumb across her lower lip. “You set limits right from the start. We’ll get him a television that has a timer. When the TV turns off, he’s finished for the day. Some of the newer game consoles have timers built in, but mine’s really old.”

  “I’d rather just get him a bunch of books…only today when I gave him the balloons, I don’t think he could read the one that said, ‘Get Well Soon.’”

  “Has Dr. Bradley been in to evaluate him yet?”

  Nyxie shook her head. “Not unless she came early this morning.”

  “I’ll remind Dr. Patel in the morning to give her a buzz. By the way, my parents are bringing the Nintendo tomorrow evening when they come for dinner.”

  Her head jerked around to face him. “Please, tell me you’re joking.”

  “I’m afraid not. I need to tell them the big news before the newspaper reveals that we got our marriage license. My parents would be hurt if one of their friends found out before they did.”

  Nyxie rolled up against him and put her hand on his bare chest. “Can’t you just call and tell them?”

  “Would you tell Cody over the phone?” He covered her hand with his. “It’s going to be all right. I already told Major, if Coach couldn’t be nice, to leave him at home.”

  Nyxie didn’t respond; she just shut down. She pulled her hand back and rolled onto her side away from him. When her legs drew up, Declan began to grasp how truly upset she felt.

  “Roll on your back and put your hands flat against the headboard.”

  Nyxie responded to the sound of Declan’s voice. His Dom voice. Her whole body tingled with awareness as her back touched the mattress and her hands reached for the laminate of the headboard.

  Declan pulled her panties down her legs. “God, I promised myself I wasn’t going to fuck you at work.”

  As soon as he had her pink cotton panties off and her satiny pajama top opened, Declan turned his full attention to the sensitive nub between her legs, lowering his head to her hidden folds.

  Nyxie didn’t want to respond to him. She could barely think of anything but their discussion. But the more he licked, suckled and gently bit her most private area, the more her traitorous body reacted.

  “I dare you not to come, baby.”

  She had no idea what he meant, but just the prospect of defying him sent her over the edge with an intensity that made her whimper, and her breath come out in gasps.

  “You’re so beautiful when you come,” he said, stretching his body over hers and kissing her slow and lingeringly. “I’ve never known another woman who smiles when she climaxes. It always makes me wonder why we all don’t.”

  When Declan reached for his phone, she thought he intended to take a picture, but he pressed the display a few times and set it between her breasts.

  “Keep your hands where they are and don’t make a sound,” he said as the phone connected and began ringing.

  He fed his large dick into her hot depths and slowly began making love to her.

  “Declan, honey, what’s wrong?” his mother said without saying hello.

  “Nothing, Major. Sorry to call so late. I didn’t wake you, did I?”

  “You know we don’t go to bed until after the 10:00 o’clock news.”

  Declan continued his slow pace, pulling out until only the engorged head of his penis remained inside her, then giving her his full length with deliberate slowness.

  “If Coach is there, put your phone on speaker so I can talk to you both.”

  “Hey, Declan, what’s going on?”

  “Just checking to see if you’re both coming to supper tomorrow.”

  Declan made eye contact with Nyxie and grinned seductively at her as he gave her one hard fast thrust before returning to his torturously slow pace.

  Roy made a harrumph on the other end of the line. “I guess I’m coming, but I hope you aren’t expecting me to apologize.”

  Declan tweaked one of her nipples. Her eyes closed and her breath caught. “I would never ask you to apologize because I know it would be insincere. But I am asking for you to be civil. Nyxie is very special to me, and frankly, I don’t think you’re going to want to alienate the woman who may someday be the mother of your grandchildren.”

  His mother gasped. “Declan, honey, I know you like th
is girl. She’s pretty and her lack of culture might seem exotic, and I don’t know, maybe even exciting. Just what do you know about her? Your dad asked around and it sounds like she has a very unsavory family.”

  “Yeah, well, you’ll just have to get past judging her over her family, just like she had to get past judging me on mine.”

  Nyxie tighten the muscles surrounding his cock. His eyes rolled back as he closed them. His hips began thrusting harder, faster making Nyxie smile at him.

  “Us?” Dorothea said. “What’s not to like?”

  The rise and fall of Nyxie’s chest was growing quicker. The phone between her breasts moving with it. He reached between their bodies and pressed on her clitoris with his thumb. Even as he made tiny circles, he began pressing harder until she began to climax.

  “Declan, are you still there?”

  “Yes, Major. Did you say something? I’m afraid I was a bit distracted.”

  “Is something wrong?”

  “No, Nyxie just came in.”

  “Tell her we said hello.”

  “Don’t tell her I said hello,” Roy interrupted.

  Declan thrust into her. “My mom says, hi. She says hi back,” he said without waiting for a response.

  Nyxie planted her heels and lifted her hips with his next push.

  “Did you tell her I apologized for what I said? It was really thoughtless of me to say it to anyone.”

  “I’m afraid my mind is on other things when I’m with Nyxie. I guess I forgot.”

  The woman sighed loud enough to be heard on their end of the line.

  Nyxie mouthed the words, “I love you,” to him.

  “I’ve got to go. The hospital is calling on the other line. See you tomorrow.”

  “I love you, honey,” Dorothea said.

  “Love you too, Major. Love you, Coach.”

  “Shut up. Men don’t say that to each other.”

  Declan laughed. “Sorry, Coach. I’m in love. I guess I lost my head.”

  “It wears off, kid. Don’t do anything stupid—especially not with her.”

  “I gotta go,” he said, and pushed the display to end the call.

  Nyxie laughed. “Oh, my God. That was wrong in so many ways.”

  “Oh, baby there are a hundred ways to say fuck you to your parents. That may be my favorite one so far.” He set the phone side. “Put your arms around my neck.”

  When she complied, he shifted their positions so they were upright, with Nyxie straddling his lap. He pulled her as tightly against his body as he could and buried his face in the slender column of her neck.

  Nyxie startled and tensed at the unexpected contact to the vulnerable area. “Yellow,” she whispered into his ear, forcing herself not to pull back.

  He turned his face away from her throat and began kissing her shoulder, his rhythm never interrupted. “I love you, Nyxie,” he said. “I didn’t know love could feel like this.”

  His body shuddered as he came. “I’m never letting you go.”

  Chapter 4

  “Do you want to drive?” Declan asked as they approached her Lexus.

  “No, sir,” she said. “My mind is too preoccupied. Are you okay to drive? Did you get any sleep at all?”

  Declan had been called back to work only minutes after they had made love the night before. “An hour here, thirty minutes there.”

  “When do you go back to work?”

  “I have 24 hours off.” He opened her door and held her elbow as she climbed in.

  “You know you really don’t have to hold the door and help me in, especially now that we’re an old married couple,” she said, reaching for her seatbelt.

  “We aren’t going to start renegotiating things we’ve already agreed upon, just because we’re married.”

  “You’re the boss,” she said with a slight flirtation in her voice.

  He gave her a quick kiss and a little grin that showed he liked her response. She wondered how he’d feel about her treating him as her Dom in front of his parents. Nyxie sensed the previous time she’d met his mother, that the woman didn’t like Declan opening the car door or having suggested which shirt she wore. It would really annoy the woman if she called him sir and kept her head lowered.

  “What time are your parents coming over?”

  “Seven. Does that give you enough time to fix something?”

  “What? You didn’t tell me you wanted me to cook.” Her voice’s timbre rose, revealing her new stress level.

  He laughed at the panic he had caused her. “Calm down. Sonia left something in the fridge. I wouldn’t do that to you. Hell, I saw the things you usually eat, so I made the assumption you don’t know how to cook.”

  “I can follow a recipe.” She couldn’t keep the pout out of her voice.

  “Well, you don’t need to don your chef hat today. Everything is already prepared; we just have to pop the chicken enchiladas in the oven, and take the plastic wrap off the salad. Have you ever eaten cornbread salad?”

  One side of her lip curled up in a small snarl. “I’ve never even heard of it before.”

  “Neither have I, but Sonia said it’s good and goes well with the enchiladas.”

  Nyxie put her hands under her legs and rocked her body back and forth. “I don’t really have much of an appetite.”

  “Did you eat a large snack this afternoon?”

  “I haven’t been hungry all day.” More accurately, the prospect of sharing a meal with his parents had made her lose her appetite. She had been trying, with no luck, to think up a way to get out of it.

  “If you’ve hardly eaten all day, you’re hungry. I expect you to eat.”

  Her shoulders slumped. “Yes, sir.”

  They drove in silence most of the way home. Declan was exhausted, and Nyxie couldn’t release her anxiety over the prospect of being near his parents.

  “Sir, would you pick out what you want me to wear?”

  “That’s the third time you’ve called me sir in a matter of a few minutes.”

  “You like it when I call you sir.”

  Anything he was about to respond, went unspoken when he saw a car parked in front of his house.

  “Is that your mom and dad?” she asked, certain his parents would love nothing better than to come over early to catch her unprepared. Once Dorothea learned they were married, would she show up unexpectedly, hoping to find their house in disarray?

  “There’s a state seal on that car. It must be CPS to conduct your home study.”

  “Now?”

  “Apparently so.”

  “Fuck me.”

  Declan chuckled as he reached over to give her hand a reassuring squeeze, but seeing her hands under her thighs, he rubbed the back of his fingers on her forearm. “It’s going to be fine, Nyxie. Tell her you’re still moving in. Sonia put all your purchases in your side of the townhouse. You may have to wade through them if there’s something specific she wants to see. I really don’t know how this works.”

  Nyxie lifted her hand, held it in front of her, and watched as it trembled. In seconds, it was back under her leg. “I’m nervous.”

  Rather than park in the garage, Declan pulled up behind the CPS worker. “You have nothing to be afraid of. The judge is on your side. If there is anything wrong, we’ll fix it. Don’t volunteer information about your old place. If Sonia hasn’t been to the grocery store yet, bring her over to my place and show her my fridge—after all we are married.”

  Declan stepped out of the car, and without thinking to wait on him, Nyxie did too. He frowned at her, but said nothing, knowing she hadn’t done it to defy him. Rosita Gomez got out of her car as soon as she saw them. He greeted the caseworker with an outstretched hand and a friendly smile.

  “I hope you haven’t been waiting long.”

  “I caught your housekeeper earlier. She told me you wouldn’t be home until this evening so I came back.”

  “Come on in. We’re planning on tearing down a wall, or at least putting in
doors to make this one big house instead of two separate townhouses.”

  Rosita opened her notebook and began writing. “And where will everyone be staying during the construction?” she asked. She looked over the rim of her reading glasses with a raised eyebrow.

  Declan looked taken aback by her tone. “I have vacation time coming up. So we’ll have the work done while we’re away.”

  “How long is this going to take?” Nyxie asked. “My husband’s parents are coming over for dinner and we need to get ready.”

  “Nyxie, don’t worry about that. Look, if you don’t need me, I’ll go take my shower now, so at least one of us will be dressed when they get here. Do you have your keys?”

  Nyxie nodded and led the woman up the walk to the front door of the B-side. “I’m still getting moved in,” she said, expecting the apartment to be overrun with bags of merchandise. To her surprise, everything looked homey and neat thanks to the housekeeper. Sonia had purchased houseplants, decorative pillows, and even a lightweight throw blanket to warm up the living room. Apparently, Sonia had put away all of the things she purchased.

  The woman barely glanced at the room as she moved into the kitchen, went straight to the sink and opened the cabinet underneath. “You need to lock up your household cleaners.”

  “The youngest one is eight. She knows better than to consume anything like that,” she said defensively.

  “Older kids can use chemicals to get high. They need to be locked up.”

  “Yes, ma’am. I didn’t think about that. Do you have some paper so I can write this down?”

  “I’ll give you a copy of my report. Do you have a fire extinguisher?”

  ~*~

  Declan sat in his living room, reading the report, when his parents pulled up. The chicken enchiladas were in the oven, filling the room with the most delicious aroma; the table was set, and Nyxie was in the bedroom getting ready. He met them at the door before they could ring the bell.

  Coach looked as miserable as Declan knew Nyxie felt. His arm surrounded a box with Declan’s old Nintendo and games. Declan took the box from him as he entered, and set it on the floor next to the door.