Love Disorder

by Yuriko Hime

  Chapter 6. Assumptions

  At one point in their lives, people have kept secrets. I remember when Carter attempted his first lock picking. He'd done it countless times on dummy locks, but it was his first real attempt to break into someone's secret compartment, which turned out to be his sister's drawer in the closet. I wasn't there to witness it. He told me later that the closet was half-filled with homemade porn stash. He regretted knowing that about his sister, and he made me promise not to tell.

  Mom kept secrets too. She'd sometimes leave in the middle of the night and made sure to come home before I woke up. Only I wasn't asleep in the first place, and I knew she was sneaking off somewhere. I never found out where she went and who she was with.

  In a way, my own secret was a collection of other people's secrets. Knowing that Carter broke into his sister's cabinet. Knowing that his sister had a porn collection. Knowing that mom was keeping something from me.

  All those secrets were nothing compared to Uno's. They didn't give me a chill on my spine. They didn't worry me. They didn't make me curious at all. Uno's secret, meanwhile, kept me awake at night. It made me second guess her, if she was every bit the good person that mom had loved. Finding a hidden door on her bedroom was one thing, but reading the message at the back of the picture? Now that was creepy.

  I wanted to ask her about it. Sad as it was, I was still hanging on a balance. Half of me wanted to know why she was so shady. Another part made me zip my lips in fear of losing her trust and being sent to a foster home. You see my dilemma here? I couldn't assert myself without ending on my backside.

  "I brought your lunch," I said, placing the tray just outside her bedroom door. On the right side so she wouldn't step on it accidentally. "I'm going out to see my friend. Want to tag along?" I wasn't surprised when she refused to answer. "Okay, I'm leaving. Call me if you need anything." I took one last reluctant glance at the closed door before turning my back.

  Carter was waiting for me in the milk tea shop owned by one of his sisters. He was seated in the corner most part of the store, hunched over and concentrating on his phone. He didn't look up when I sat in front of him. "Don't I get a hello?" I asked.

  "Hello." His eyes remained glued on the screen.

  I frowned. "Yeah, ignore your best friend like that. Let's see who stays with you when you're old, wrinkly, and have no one to marry. You'll be stuck with me forever, so might as well be nice."

  The corner of his mouth pulled upward. We had a running joke about how no one would be interested enough to want to marry us. That we'd be stuck together like old maids hitting each other with the remote till we die. "Bitter much?" he said. Carter switched his mobile off and tucked it in his pocket. I got his attention now. "Tell me everything."

  I unzipped the blue backpack I brought with me. "There," I said, placing the picture of Uno in front of him. "Read it for yourself and tell me that it's not weird." He took the picture and read the message at the back. Since seeing it weeks ago, I've been torn whether to tell another soul about it or not. You could guess the answer. Carter gave the picture back to me quietly. "And she hasn't left her room in a while," I supplied.

  "How long exactly?" he asked.

  "More than two weeks. When I agreed to be her manager, she made me sign a contract as soon as we were home." I took the contract from my bag and showed it to Carter too.

  "There's no sense in being worried with this because you're still a minor. Technically," he added while staring at the paper. "You can get out of this contract if you want to. I think it's more for formality sake, not the legal kind. And you'll be fine. You're mature enough to handle such things." He pushed the paper on the table to me. It bore our agreement- my name and signature, as well as Uno's.

  "That's not my problem at all. Even if it's an under the table transaction, I wouldn't win the case anyway if I take it to court. You know how much money she got? And where will I go if she loses?"

  "Then why are you panicking?"

  "I'm not."

  "This is the first time I've seen you like that," he remarked. "You're usually Miss keep her head cool, I've got it under wraps." He brought out his phone again.

  I rolled my eyes. "Have you not seen the message behind the picture? It says, and I quote, help me. It's trying to escape again." I snatched his phone before he could play with it. I wanted his full attention. "How can someone keep her cool after reading that? Uno is hiding something awful," I said.

  He didn't look convinced. "There's a rational explanation for this. She might be talking about a pet that has been trying to escape."

  "You put that message at the back of a picture?" I scoffed. "And there's no pet."

  "That you know of," he pointed out. "Maybe at the time of the writing there was. Look Ri," he said, using the nickname everyone has given me in high school. "I don't know what you're expecting to find out. I always support you, but this has got to stop. You've been messaging me about this for days. It's not like she's keeping skeletons in her closet." His expression darkened. He might be thinking about his sister's homemade porn special. "Even if she does, we all keep secrets, but it doesn't mean that hers is dangerous."

  I exhaled slowly. "Answer me one question before I brush this off." He nodded and waited. "Why has she locked herself in her bedroom for weeks? For all I know she might be keeping someone prisoner there. She hasn't left in days. I had to bring her food outside her room. She was okay when we were at the park. Now she refuses to talk to me again."

  Carter was at loss for words for once. I was about to say that fact when he slammed his palm on the table loudly. "Religion! Religious practices dude," he said. "Sometimes they need to be alone for a while you know. Maybe she's a Buddhist." For a maybe, he sounded too sure of himself. Carter waved an apology to his sister who was sitting behind the counter. She was not happy that he was scaring the other customers. I waved a hello at her, and she smiled back.

  "I don't take Uno as someone religious," I said.

  "We have our quirks okay?" he argued. "She's a religious nutjob. I love locks, and you like clothes." He pushed his chair back. "And the reason you're playing Sherlock is because you've been cooped up in the house for too long." He nudged his chin to the door. "Let's have fun for a change. Take your mind off that negative vibe."

  I trudged behind him to the door. "Make sure your idea of fun is cheap because I don't have money," I said. "I've been saving everything I earn from the designs I've sold online, so I don't have to borrow from Uno for my college expenses. Mom might have left me a fund for that, but I think it's not going to be enough to cover my daily living."

  He opened the door for both of us. The sunlight hurt my eyes. He was right when he said I was cooped up. Though Uno's house was partly made of glass, I haven't stepped out like this in a while. "Wouldn't she give you a salary when you become her manager?"

  "I don't have a clue about the salary. We haven't talked about it yet. I don't even know if I can balance college with her demands."

  "I'm sure you can," Carter said.

  We walked down the street. It was a change of pace to see this many people for once. Uno's property felt so secluded that when I was inside its gates, it seemed like we were the only ones left on earth. It was like a heavenly prison.

  Our destination was not far from the milk tea shop. It was just a couple of blocks to their other store, which his parents co-manage. With two stores in the city, you'd think that Carter and his folks were filthy rich, but if you were somewhere as big as this state, it was hard to compete with popular shops in the mall. They managed fine, though if it were up to me the shops should be more known, especially the clothing store. They sold good designs.

  "They're on lunch break," Carter said, fishing out his keychain. "But I got these." Instead of keys, it contained long strip of thin metals, similar to safety pins. He jiggled it in front of my face. Carter started undoing the lock using those.

  "I don't know why you're wasting your time with that when you can al
ways use the keys your parents gave you." I glanced nervously over my shoulder. Passerby's might think that we were breaking in.

  "Nonsense." He smiled when the lock clicked. Carter shoved the glass door open and flipped the sign to inform people that it was operational. He went straight behind the counter to check the cash register. "This is what I'm talking about." He took the cash and fanned it over his face. "They're lucky that I'm a good person Ri. If I wasn't, I'd have used my gifts to steal things." He put the money back on the register and closed it with a satisfied smirk. He was happy enough to know that he could, but he didn't.

  "You're such a clown," I said sarcastically. Carter shrugged and whipped his phone out. I let him be. There were more important things to do inside their shop than argue or reprimand him from what he wanted to do. I understood why he took me here. Being around clothes relaxes me. It was a favorite place of mine to get inspiration.

  I walked silently to one isle. My reflection was caught on the big mirror on the wall. I stopped to take a look. The circles around my eyes got deeper from lack of sleep. I was in desperate need of a long one. My weight stayed the same, bordering on the skinny side, but not too awkward. The word strawberry came to mind when I checked my long hair. Curse Uno and her reference for that. I touched my lips.

  "Have you ever fallen in love?" I asked Carter.

  He was busy smashing virtual buttons on his touch screen. "Err. . . Yes and no?"

  I cocked an eyebrow at him. "Really? How come I've never known this until now?"

  "Uhh, because you didn't ask? Seriously though, it was nothing, so I didn't care to bring it up. I was too young."

  "Who is it then?"

  His ears turned pink. "Our teacher in freshman. I thought I was in love back then. I think all little boys at one point had fantasies with their teachers."

  I went in front of the counter. "Sounds interesting. What's it like being in love?"

  He stared suspiciously at me. "Why do you want to know? You're keeping something from me aren't you?" he said accusingly. If I had a brother, he would probably sound just like Carter.

  "Of course not," I said. "I'm just curious. I've never experienced it before."

  His gaze fell back to the phone. "I think you know you're in love when you have the nasty realization that a person is not perfect but you're still willing to go through with it." He shrugged. "I don't have much experience. It's something I observed from my parents. My sisters too. I've seen them break their hearts one too many times because of a boy, and I've broken my nose one too many, fighting other people because of it."

  "What a sweet brother." I batted my lashes at him.

  "Shut up," he murmured under his breath. I was the unspoken younger sister to him too. It was my job to tease.

  Soon, Carter's parent's came back from their lunch break. We stayed there for a while, but I decided to go home to Uno's house, thinking that she'd be lonely without company. Not that she needed me though. I really kind of missed her. Even the snobby version who refused to talk to me. Who would have thought she'd grow on me that fast.

  I was on the way back to where I've parked the "borrowed" truck when my backpack got tangled with a pedestrian's watch. The man was showing something to his wife when I was passing. His watch somehow hooked to the keychain attached to my zipper. The contents of my bag spilled on the sidewalk.

  The man paused to help retrieve my things. "I'm sorry chap," he said with a heavy accent. "Too many people on the bloody area." Something caught his attention on the other side of the street. His eyes widened. "Bloody hell, that's our bike! Oi!" He shoved the book to me. "Sorry miss, I have to go." The man ran with his wife to catch up to the thief. I shook my head in dismay as I watched them go. A stolen bike in broad daylight? The world was coming to an end.

  Someone stooped low in front of me. I turned to see a woman in mid-40's, glasses, scarf, curly hair tied hurriedly. She was wearing a conservative attire comprised of a knee length skirt, blazer, and black shoes. I could tell that she was a professional. The woman picked my pencil case first and handed it to me. "Thanks," I said in gratitude.

  "No problem. I saw what happened," she said politely. "Let me get that for you." She hurriedly grabbed the paper which has begun to fly away. She latched onto it and glanced at the paper out of habit. The woman frowned. She didn't give it back to me immediately.

  "What's wrong?" I asked. We both stood.

  "Are you by any chance related to Estella Chance?"

  "Uhh, yeah. She's my. . ." I cleared my throat. "She was my mother. Why?"

  The woman smiled quickly at me before handing the paper. "I'm sorry, but when I read your name on the paper, I thought it sounded familiar." I glanced at it. It was the contract that Uno and I signed. I shoved it in my backpack away from view. "From what I understand on the writing, you're going to be Uno's new manager. Am I correct?"

  I moved a step back. "Please forget that you saw that paper. It was nothing," I said.

  She touched her chin thoughtfully. "Now that I think about it, she did mention meeting with a Riri. It must be you then." The woman extended a hand. "Hello, I'm Doctor Sanders. I'm not a stalker of Uno. If you're really going to be her manager, she can tell you all about me. There's no reason to be tense."

  "Who said I was?" I denied.

  She adjusted her glasses. "Your body language says so. Trembling lower lips. Frozen hands to the side. Eyes skimming for an escape route." She chuckled. "I am a Psychologist."

  Upon hearing that, I relaxed at once. Psychologist. So she was a colleague of Uno, or perhaps a friend in the same field. I offered to shake her hand. "Sorry about that, Doctor. I haven't had anything to eat, so I'm a little jittery."

  "Happens to the best of us." We let go. "Anyway, I'm running on a tight schedule. Have to meet up with another client. I'd appreciate if you pass a message to Uno for me. She hasn't answered any of my messages, and I'm getting worried that she might be taking things hard."

  Like mom's death? I thought sadly. To Doctor Sanders I said, "Sure. What's the message?"

  She didn't blink. "Tell her to see me at once or it's going to get worse."

  Chapter 7. Chance

  To what extent did religious practices require a person to seclude herself from the rest of the world? As far as I could tell, Uno hasn't resurfaced in the land of the living for weeks. Her lockdown was still in effect. I was worried, and I wasn't the type to worry. She did eat. The tray that I continuously placed in front of her room was clean whenever I returned to retrieve it. Yet I was still worried.

  What could she be doing there? Praying? Watching TV? Kneeling? The part of me that didn't like getting into other's business wanted to leave her alone. The bigger half of me that has known her to be a good person wanted to make sure that she was alright. Doctor Sanders' message also came to mind. See her at once or it was going to get worse. Add that to the hidden door in Uno's room and the message behind the picture, and I've got myself the world's biggest mystery next to the Loch Ness monster and Big Foot.

  I pounded my fist on Uno's door. "Open up," I said. "What are you doing there?" Like yesterday, and the numerous days before that, there was nothing but the sound of my breathing. I pounded harder. "Have you spoken to Doctor Sanders? You need to see her." I pressed my ear on her door. If only I could hear something- a television game show or the sound of an instrument. Then at least I'd know that she was alright. "If you don't open this door, I will call the police. This has been going on for too long."

  Footsteps. Those were definitely footsteps. I took a step back as the door opened a crack. I could see her blue eyes peeking at me from the dark room. "Are you alright?" I asked. "You haven't come out in days."

  "I'm good," she said in a raspy voice. The kind of voice that said she hasn't been speaking for a long time. "I'd really appreciate it if you tone it down a notch. I'm trying to rest." It was unsettling to just see half of her face, mostly her eyes, and not the other parts of her because of the darkness.

&
nbsp; My caring instinct kicked in. "Are you sick? I can take you to the doctor if you are. Tell me what's wrong so I can help you." I attempted to move closer. The crack on the door became narrower, making me stop on my heels. "You want me to be your manager right? I think it's the manager's duty to make sure her talent is ok." What was I saying? I had no experience with this. Fake it till you make it?

  "I'm feeling under the weather," she said. "I'll come around soon. Why don't you take the time to visit your friends. Think of it as a vacation. My treat." She cleared her throat. "There's a wallet in the glove compartment of the truck. Use the money there to buy grocery for the house and other stuff you need. You can also treat yourself to new clothes."

  "It feels like I'm being bribed," I said uncertainly.

  "Then consider it a command from your employer. If you're serious about this as you said, you can't say no to my request. And trust me, I'm fine." As an afterthought she said, "Manager Chance did this for me too. She gave me an alone time whenever I needed it. Can you do that for me?"

  I shifted my weight on the other leg. I wanted nothing more than to kick the door open, but that would be too much. "Is this for religion?"

  "Nothing to do with that. It's a personal journey."

  "Okay then." I sighed. "You know my number. Call me."

  I was driving the truck on the way to buy food and stock for the pantry when my phone vibrated. Thinking that it was Uno needing something from me, I didn't hesitate to push the speaker button. This would be quick, I promised myself. "Hello, I'm driving. Hurry up or I'll go to jail for this. I'm not even allowed to drive alone yet."

  "Sheesh, talk about uptight," Carter said. "You're turning eighteen soon. And guess what I have for you?"

  "I don't know. I'm stopping this call."