The Surfer Solution

by Cathy Yardley

  Her parents stared at her. Then, to her surprise, they both turned as one to Rod.

  “You’re right,” her mother said to Rod, not even glancing at Allison. “I wouldn’t have believed it, but she’s changed completely.”

  “What?” Allison said, floored.

  “How long have you been seeing this young man?” her father demanded.

  She blinked. “This? This is what you have to talk to me about? Sean?”

  She would’ve laughed if she weren’t so furious.

  “Rod mentioned that you were seeing a surfer,” her mother said, standing up and crossing her arms. “You’re a grown woman, obviously, and ordinarily we wouldn’t want to intrude on your life, but we have noticed that you’ve been, well, not yourself. We noticed it at Christmas, but we didn’t want to say anything until we’d gathered more data.”

  “And now that you’ve got one week’s worth of observations, Mom? What’s the conclusion?”

  “Well, you’ve never been quite this cross before,” her mother replied tartly. “You don’t seem to care about your work anymore, you’re curt to your family. Rod said you practically bit his head off....”

  She looked at Rod. “You always were a narc,” she said.

  His answering glare and shrug really did transform them, her back to twelve, him to fifteen. “I just saw that you were losing it. You’re obviously not interested in what I think, but I thought you’d listen to Mom and Dad. Although you didn’t seem this far gone the other day.”

  “What is supposed to be wrong with me, anyway?” Allison’s voice went up belligerently. To her shock, it actually felt good to yell. To be bitchy. Hell, it was the holidays. She had a perfect right to let loose, didn’t she?

  She took a deep breath. No, she didn’t. She wasn’t that person.

  “I’m sorry,” she said, and this time, she meant it. “But this doesn’t have to do with Sean. I care a great deal about him,” she said, and her voice trembled a little. She took a deep breath, and found herself saying, “I may even love him. I don’t know yet. But I do know one thing: I love who I am when I’m with him. And I like myself a whole lot better than I did earlier this year.”

  Her mother looked puzzled, and not surprisingly, she picked up a pad of paper and a pen. It was how her mother coped with things, Allison remembered. “The two of you are from completely different worlds,” she finally said in a “be reasonable” voice. “There’s no way he can possibly understand...”

  Her father walked over to the cut-crystal decanter of Hennessy and poured himself a drink. Ah, yes. Her father’s coping method jumping to the fore. “This makes absolutely no sense,” he said, taking a long swallow and then coughing slightly, the experienced drinker’s cough. “How do you know this isn’t some surf bum, out for what he can get? If he’s just using you? You’ll get all wrapped up with him and next thing you know, that career of yours is in the toilet with these shenanigans!”

  “I’ll have you know, my career is going just fine, thanks,” Allison said, suppressing the desire to stick her tongue out at Rod. Or, say, key his car. “In fact, if you guys hadn’t been so bent on shining a light in my eyes and asking me how my sex life was ruining my social skills, I could’ve told you. I got promoted. We landed the account. You’re looking at one of the youngest account supervisors at our ad agency, working on one of the largest accounts we’ve ever landed.” Now she crossed her arms. “So yay, me.”

  “Well, we’re proud of you, of course, but do you really think you’re in any position to handle this,” her mother asked, her voice full of concern, “in your current state?”

  Allison stared at her, slack-jawed. “You’re kidding me, right? You have to be kidding me!”

  Her father looked at her. “Don’t take that tone with your mother!”

  “I just told you I got promoted. So there aren’t really any concerns if that’s what you’re really worried about,” Allison yelled. Yes, yelled. “And you don’t have any right to all but ignore me and then take the time to call me up on the carpet for something that is absolutely none of your business. That goes for you, too, Rod,” she said tightly, turning.

  “Where do you think you’re going?” her father roared.

  “I could be polite and say I’m going to another party,” she said over her shoulder, “but I know what you’d be thinking. You think I’m rushing off to go sleep with my new boyfriend, the one that’s apparently making me psychotic and is somehow going to be responsible for the downfall of western civilization in general and our family in particular. And you know what? You’d be right!”

  It was about then that she realized her voice was echoing in her parents’ cathedral-ceiling living room, for the edification of their various guests.

  She felt the blush boil in her cheeks as she cleared her throat. “Um, happy New Year, everybody,” she said.

  And then fled.

       

  “So WHERE’S YOUR GIRL?” Gabe asked.

  Sean frowned. “She was supposed to go to her parents’ place. Some family thing,” he said, feeling a little uneasy. Here it was, quarter to midnight, and she still wasn’t there.

  He hoped nothing had gone wrong. He hadn’t talked to her since she’d gone off to work this morning, and he knew that it was going to be a stressful day.

  “Are you okay?” Gabe asked. “I swear, for a guy who’s supposedly Mr. Zen Surfer, you’re starting to look pretty freaked out.”

  Sean sighed.

  “It’s the new job, isn’t it?” Now Sean looked over at him and felt his stomach drop. “Heard, huh?”

  “I think Steve wanted to make sure that I knew,” Gabe said. “He’s a good kid, but kind of a go-getter. Have you decided when you’re going to start? Is that part of what’s got you so spun out?”

  Sean glanced around. Gabe and Charlotte’s house was milling with people, all having a good time, dancing, talking, laughing, listening to music. It was just the kind of scene he loved, with people he loved.

  But this was going to be bad.

  “Can’t hear myself think in here,” Sean said. “Come on.”

  He and Gabe walked out to the front porch of Gabe’s house, a large, three-story Victorian. He could hear the muted sounds of the party inside, but underneath that, he could hear the sounds of the surf, some three blocks away, faint but reassuring.

  “Gabe...” he started slowly. “You know, I...”

  “Oh, no.” Gabe shook his head in disbelief. “You’re turning the job down.”

  This was the problem with having friends who’d known you since junior high. They could practically read your mind. “Yeah. I haven’t called Steve yet, but that’s the plan.”

  Gabe crossed his arms, leaning against the house. “Why?”

  “The surf shop...”

  “The surf shop’s over, Sean.” Gabe’s voice was sharp with impatience. “I know how much it meant to you, and I know you’ll need time to get over it. But come on, buddy...you’ve got to move on. You’ve got to get a job, right? You’ve got to pay your rent—you’ve got to make sure you’re taken care of!”

  “I’m not a complete idiot,” Sean said, letting a little anger edge his own voice. “But I know that I’m not going to be happy working sales...not that way, don’t get started. What do I care if a bunch of stores order ten more units of winter suits or… or women’s hoodies, for God’s sake? It’s not just the store, damn it. I love teaching surfing, I love helping all the neighborhood kids get started. It’s… I don’t know. Being a part of the community. It’s like being a part of you guys, you know? Grown men with a goofy surf-crew name. But we have a hell of a good time, and we’re always there for each other.”

  Gabe smiled a little at that one. “Yeah. Guess we do.”

  “I know the surf shop’s closing—I can’t stop that.” Sean’s voice was pleading. “But I just...I can’t just say ‘forget it’ and move on to a desk job that, as much as I believe in your products and know you guy
s mean well, I will be miserable in. I’ll hate it, Gabe.”

  Gabe sighed heavily. “What’s your option? What are you going to do instead?”

  Sean shrugged. “Haven’t figured that part out yet. But I know something will turn up.” He laughed, with very little humor. “Apparently other surf shops out there are hiring.”

  “Sean,” Gabe said, “I know it’s your life. But you’re thirty- one. You could be doing so much more with your life.”

  “I could,” Sean said. “But it’s my choice. I’d rather do something I love than make tons of money doing something I hate.”

  Gabe stared at him. Then he nodded, putting a hand out to give Sean a one-armed hug. “You know I’m just looking out for you, man.”

  “I appreciate that.” And the thing was, he really did. He knew that Gabe wasn’t just busting his chops.

  “So. Does that lady of yours know about your decision?”

  “Today was going to be kind of a tough day for her,” Sean said. “I thought I’d see how that went first, before I told her.”

  Now Gabe smirked. “Okay. Gotta call you a big chicken on that one.”

  Sean was surprised into a laugh. “I’m a little nervous, but no kidding—today was going to be difficult. Her job...it’s been making her nuts. I get the feeling her family’s probably the reason why,” Sean said. “She’s got issues. My stuff is bush league, comparatively speaking. So I’ll let her process what she needs to tonight, and then I’ll tell her when she’s feeling a little better.”

  “Do you think it’ll bother her?”

  Sean paused before answering that one. It was something else he’d been worrying about, a little bit, since he made the decision to turn down the job offer. He wanted to be settled, to know that he had a job and a place to live, before he got seriously involved with Allison. But they’d sort of jumped the gun on those plans, and now he realized that all his talk of needing to be settled and have his life in order was just that, talk.

  Not a lot in his life made sense right now, but he knew one thing. His life made a lot more sense with her in it. And considering all her recent experiences with hating her job, with the stress around her family... he had to think that she would understand.

  He prayed that she would understand.

  “Come on in, have a beer,” Gabe said. “I’ll stay off your back until you ask for help, I promise.”

  “No worries,” Sean said, wishing that were true. “I think I’m going to just hang out here in the quiet for a few minutes.”

  “You got it.” Gabe retreated back into the house, leaving Sean alone with the dark and the sounds of the ocean at night.

  She has to understand.

  He heard the patter of fast footsteps and turned, only to find Allison leaping at him. He caught her as she threw her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Then she kissed him, full on, her mobile mouth meshing with his, her tongue sliding across his lips until his tangled with hers. His breath immediately went short, and his body went into launch sequence.

  She pulled back, breathless. "Did I make it? I broke like fifteen traffic laws getting here."

  He rested his forehead on hers. "Yeah, you made it. Even have some time to spare."

  "Oh, really?" Her eyes shone like stars. "Whatever shall we do?"

  He pulled her back, feasting on her mouth.

  She'll understand, he thought briefly.

  God, he hoped she'd understand.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  ALLISON WOKE UP with Sean’s arm around her, feeling a little cramped and a little sore. Not from the night’s activities. . .although she did feel pleasantly exercised, she remembered with a grin. No, the sore muscles were from sleeping on Sean’s futon. She was spoiled by her own mattress at home.

  “Next time, we sleep at my place,” she said in a soft voice, turning over and kissing him on the chin.

  “Like the sound of that,” he said, blinking like an owl. “Good morning, beautiful.”

  “Morning,” she said, feeling happy, peaceful. Relieved, now that the whole thing was behind her.

  “What did you feel like doing today?”

  “Surfing,” she said. “And you.”

  “I think we can put both of those on the agenda,” he answered with a chuckle, nuzzling her neck. “I need to look at the tides, though.”

  “Whatever the tides are like, I want to get in as much surfing as I possibly can,” she said. “And whenever I can’t surf, I want to spend as much time as possible with you. If that’s all right.”

  He looked at her, those blue eyes of his dreamy, but wary. “So, are we going to talk at all?” he asked.

  She remembered her edict from last night, after talking to her parents. In the light of a new year, it seemed sort of moot, but she still sighed. “Sure.”

  “Bad news, huh?” he said, stroking her back consolingly.

  “Not exactly,” she said. “Actually, it’s good news. We got the account.”

  He blinked, smiling with obvious surprise. “Hell. That doesn’t sound that bad at all. Were you upset because you weren’t involved?” He sounded puzzled but still sympathetic. “I mean, because your boss cut you out, and all.”

  “No. Actually, the other two account execs had meltdowns, and I wound up pinch hitting,” she said slowly.

  Sean waited. Obviously things weren’t computing, and she couldn’t blame him for not following. It still seemed pretty disjointed and hard to believe for her. “But they wouldn’t give you what you wanted because they were afraid you’d melt down, right?”

  “No,” she said. “Actually, I got promoted.”

  He sat straight up. “Really? That’s great, then!”

  His smile was like the sun, and she wondered why she’d ever been worried in the first place. Of course he’d be supportive. Why wouldn’t he be?

  “So you got everything you wanted. That’s wonderful, Ally.” He paused. “I guess your parents didn’t react quite the way you wanted?”

  Not about that, she thought. “I think they’re proud of me. They said they were proud of me.”

  He sat silent for a minute. “Okay, I’m an idiot. I still don’t get it. Why, exactly, were you so upset?”

  She laughed ruefully. “Well... well.” She swallowed, then shrugged. “They were a little concerned. About you.”

  The smile slipped off his face, and she immediately bit her tongue. “I’m sorry,” she said immediately.

  “Why did... no. I bet I don’t want to know what their problem with me is,” he said with a ragged little sigh. After a second, his jaw clenched. “On second thought, I guess I do. Considering that they’ve never met me and you and I have only started having this relationship, exactly what sort of problem would they have with me?”

  “That’s the thing,” she said, hoping to repair the damage immediately. “They don’t know you. They’re just concerned that I...”

  She tried to figure out how to word it, and his frown deepened. “That you what?” he prompted.

  ‘That, after all this hard work,” she said thoughtfully, “I’m going to get sidetracked. That’s all. That I’m going to let my career slide.”

  Now he was getting that Zen-surfer look, one that looked both concerned and deep. “Ally, do they know what your career was doing to you?”

  “It wasn’t that bad,” she demurred.

  Now he blinked. “Not that bad. Do you remember how you met me?”

  “Sure I do,” she said, laughing to try to lessen the tension that was increasing with every passing second. What had happened to surfers being laid-back? “I was coercing you into teaching me how to surf.”

  “And it only took a trip to the ER to get you there,” he said softly. “Don’t suppose they know about that.”

  She stiffened, and pulled imperceptibly away from him. “Not in so many words, anyway. But they do know that work was stressing me out.”

  “Well, as long as we’re on that subject,” he said, and he pulled away a
little, too. “What about this promotion of yours? How’s that going to work? I mean, I know it was tough to get. Does this mean that the hard part’s over?”

  She wanted to say yes, but she knew she’d be lying. What’s worse, even after this short period of time, she got the feeling he’d know she was lying, too. “It’s a new account, Sean,” she said, hating how conciliatory her voice was sounding. “It’ll just be for a while. I mean, it’ll just be stressful for a while. Then it’ll get better.”

  “Really?” Now his voice took on an edge she’d never heard before. “I’m sorry, but what in the entire history of this career of yours convinces you that at some point, it’s going to actually get better?"

  She blinked at him, pulling the sheet around herself as some sort of protection. “Why are you so angry?” she said. “This isn’t like you.”

  “I thought... I don’t know what I thought.”

  “You knew what I was like when you got involved with me,” she said slowly, thinking reluctantly of her parents’ words. The two of you are from completely different worlds. There’s no way he ’ll possibly understand.

  The problem was, he always had understood, in the past. What had changed?

  “I know what you’re like, Allison, and I… I care about you for who you are,” he said, and his voice was slow and careful, too, and a distinct counterpoint to the flames in his eyes. “But I thought that you were figuring it out.”

  “Figuring what out, exactly?”

  “You told off your boss,” he said. “You stood up for yourself. You drew boundaries. You decided that you wanted your life back,” he declared, his voice shaking with passion. “So after all that, you get the promotion and you’re going to keep running yourself into the ground?”

  “Things are different now,” she assured him.

  “How?” he said with obvious frustration.

  Because now I have you!

  She shook her head. Love, a man, was never the answer. Hadn’t her parents all but...

  No. She wasn’t dragging their arguments into this.