by Jan Hahn
William frowned and I struggled not to sigh, but I rose to the occasion and summoned every gracious bone in my body. "Of course we should ask them, should we not?"
"If you think best, my dear," William said somewhat grimly.
"Who shall you spend Christmas Eve with, Richard?" Georgiana asked.
"Most probably my parents unless they invite Lady Catherine to visit them. If she is there, then I should prefer the company of my junior officers on post. Surely we lonely fellows can produce more holiday cheer among ourselves than I would experience at Eden Park."
We all smiled in agreement, although Georgiana's smile did not last. "I cannot bear the thought of you being alone at such a festive time of year."
"Then you must provide me with a happy memory to recall when I am far away, Georgie. Might you favour me with yuletide selections on the pianoforte after dinner?"
She readily agreed and we spent a portion of the evening listening to her play. Mr. Darcy prevailed upon me to join her in a duet and we sang several old tunes. At the end of our pleasant interlude, William walked his sister to the stairs after she bid us good-night, leaving Colonel Fitzwilliam and I alone in the music room. I took advantage of our privacy to speak to him.
"Richard, will you call again at Pemberley before leaving for your post abroad?"
The look on his face was pensive. "I am not sure exactly when I shall leave, but I hope to."
"Perhaps you might come for Georgiana's birthday in January. I suppose you have told her of your plans to leave England, have you not?"
"No, I shall remain silent in that regard as long as possible, for I cannot bear to see her unhappy, although I know she will forget all about me before long. She is young and has much to look forward to."
"She does, but I cannot believe she will forget you easily." I watched him walk to the mantel and stare at the flames. "Forgive my intrusion, but I cannot help but feel it is because of Georgiana that you make plans to depart these shores. Am I wrong?"
He turned and I was surprised at the pain I saw reflected in his eyes. "I wish that you were, Elizabeth."
"But why? Colonel, I know I should not ask, but is it possible you are in love with Georgiana?"
He looked away, but not before I saw the truth wash over his countenance. "If I am, it is my cross to bear and mine, alone."
"Can you not tell her?"
He shook his head. "She is still a child. I am like an older brother to her, a comfortable, old friend she has loved since childhood. No, I cannot inflict my burden upon her. 'Tis better to leave things as they are and for me to remove myself from her life."
"I do not agree," I said forcefully.
"On what do you not agree?" Mr. Darcy said, entering the room just then.
"On whether Mrs. Hurst is more tiresome than Miss Bingley," Richard said smoothly, but with a knowing look in my direction. I marveled at how well he concealed his strong emotion. It was evident he did not wish to share our conversation with his cousin.
Mr. Darcy laughed and said he thought it probably a draw. "Sometimes I wonder if Charles Bingley is truly their brother. Perhaps he is a foundling, for surely he is the complete opposite in manner and disposition."
"Siblings are not always alike," I said. "Some of my sisters are nothing akin to each other except in name."
"Quite right, my dear." He sat in the chair closest to me. "And you are completely different from all of them, the very best of the lot I declare. Would you not agree, Fitzwilliam?"
"Absolutely. You have won the prize, Darce. There can be no doubt. And now I shall retire and leave the two of you, as I feel certain my absence will not be missed."
I blushed, remembering how we had exposed ourselves more than once in front of the colonel since my husband had returned to Pemberley. William did nothing more than raise an eyebrow at him, however, as we bid him good-night.
After he had left the room, William said, "Come here, my love."
I rose, took a step toward him and laughed when he pulled me down onto his lap and began to kiss my neck.
"William! What if the servants come in?"
"They will leave immediately. Pemberley's servants are discreet."
He began to work his way around the neckline of my dress, leaving a trail of kisses that interfered greatly with my ability to breathe. When I could stand his teasing no longer, I took his face in my hands and sought his mouth, kissing him until he, too, had difficulty drawing breath.
"Do you know how happy you have made me tonight?" I asked, drawing away at last.
"Give me time and I can make you happier." He reached for me to capture my lips once again.
I laughed softly, but held myself away. "No doubt, but I refer to what you said at the table. Thank you for asking both Jane and Mr. Bingley to Pemberley for Christmas. I can only assume that you intend to make things right between them."
He sighed deeply. "I shall do what I can, Elizabeth, even though I still have reservations that Bingley is worthy of your sister."
"She loves him, William. Is it not up to her to decide his worth?"
"I suppose, although I would much rather see her with someone who is more sure of himself, more settled and mature. How about if we set her up with Fitzwilliam? Now, there is a man who knows what he wants. If he spent much time with Miss Bennet, is it not possible they might fall in love?"
I rose from his lap and turned away, not wishing to reveal my thoughts.
"Where are you going?" he demanded.
"Not far." I looked back at him over my shoulder and smiled. "Just far enough to think well enough to make a sensible statement. And as to Colonel Fitzwilliam, has he not made it clear that he must marry a woman of fortune? Surely, Jane's lack would hamper any such connection."
"Fitz is not poor by any means. He would provide for Miss Jane very well and with the dowry I have set up for her, they could live comfortably."
"I have never seen an inclination for each other on the part of either of them."
"They have been in the same company but a short while. Perhaps I can prevail upon Fitz to change his plans and join us during the holiday after all."
I walked back to him and knelt at his feet, taking his hands in mine. "William, I do not think we should play matchmaker in all of this."
"Why not? You are perfectly willing for me to prod Bingley towards your sister."
"She loves him," I said softly, laying my head upon his knee. "Believe me, I know my sister's heart and she does not love Colonel Fitzwilliam. Jane will never care for anyone as she does Mr. Bingley."
"Very well, my dear." He began to stroke my curls. "It shall be as you wish. I cannot deny you anything."
I raised my head and smiled as he leaned down to kiss me. "Then shall we go above stairs?"
"Gladly!"
We rose and exited the room, my hand tucked inside his arm. As we climbed the great staircase, I asked, "Whose bed shall we sleep in tonight, William?"
"Mine," he announced without the slightest hesitation.
"And why not mine?" I was unable to keep from teasing him.
"Because I have dreamed of having you in my bed far too many nights. You have to admit that I have been much more than patient and now I demand my rights."
"Perhaps I have dreamed the same dream, only in my bed," I persisted.
"Then let us be fair. Who has dreamt the longest? There is no question about it. I win hands down, for I have loved you much, much longer than you have loved me."
I could do nothing more than smile and lean my head against his shoulder as we continued on our way, savouring the pleasure I anticipated. How delightful to know I should never have to sleep alone again.
~ * ~
Light snow fell as Colonel Fitzwilliam left the next morning. It covered the grounds of Pemberley like fairy dust, glistening each time the sun peeked through the clouds and lit up the landscape. I hoped it might lighten Georgiana's mood, but it was not to be. She moped around for most of the day and, in truth
, her countenance did not change much for the next ten days until my sisters and mother arrived from Longbourn and the Gardiners a day later. They had, of course, accepted the invitation with alacrity. Jane wrote the response and one line in her letter had piqued my curiosity, as well as William's.
'I have something of great importance to tell you, Lizzy, but I shall wait until we are face to face before doing so.'
I could not imagine what it was and my only fear was that she might have accepted the proposal of some kind gentleman from the county, as she had threatened to do when I last saw her at Longbourn. Neither William nor I had written her to expect Mr. Bingley's attendance at Pemberley, as we had not yet heard from him. William said he was a poor correspondent and that we would probably hear from his sisters before he wrote and sure enough, Mr. Bingley proved quite late in sending his acceptance.
Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst responded that neither would be able to take advantage of our hospitality. It seemed Mr. Hurst's brother had already asked them to spend Christmas at his house in Surrey and they were invited to a Christmas ball to be held at the home of Lady Jersey's nephew, who resided in the same neighbourhood. You might imagine what severe disappointment that caused our household, but we bore it as best we could.
I had much to do to prepare Pemberley for the onslaught of visitors and thus did not spend much time alone with my sister-in-law. William persuaded her to accompany him into the woods with a couple of the servants to select the Yule log and holly bough, but that excursion did little to lift her spirits. He complained to me about her lack of holiday cheer and asked if I knew why her low mood persisted. I told him the truth, that Georgiana had not confided any reason to me, but in my heart I felt guilty in keeping silent as to what I thought lay at the base of it all. Whether she knew it or not, I thought Georgiana as much in love with Colonel Fitzwilliam as he with her. And yet, I feared that William would not wish to hear that.
So it was a great relief to have Mamá, Jane, Mary and Kitty arrive and meet Georgiana. They provided a noisy, welcome diversion and I was glad to see my family claim much of my young sister-in-law's attention. She and Mary shared a delight in music and when at the instrument, they were quite compatible. Kitty's natural exuberance could not help but aid Georgiana to emerge from her natural reticence and I hoped my sister-in-law's decorum might, in turn, influence my sister. Of course, Mamá was in awe of Pemberley - in truth, all of my sisters were impressed - but she fell speechless the first day of her visit when I took her on an extensive tour of the house. We took advantage of the muted respite and found ourselves longing for it once her vocal abilities returned, for she oohed and aahed throughout the entire establishment. She blessed Mr. Darcy again and again for marrying me and then played the coquette with him in the evenings after tasting a glass of wine. He bore it all with a tolerable spirit and I tried my best to console him when we were alone in his chamber at the end of each day, a tiresome duty but one I felt compelled to endure.
We were truly surprised by one of Mamá's statements she bestowed upon us as soon as her ability to speak returned.
"Lizzy! Has Jane told you the news?"
"What news is that, Mamá?"
"Mr. Bingley has returned to Netherfield!"
I looked at Jane in amazement and observed her blush and attempt to conceal her smile. "No, she did not tell me." I stole a glance at Mr. Darcy who appeared as surprised as I was.
"Then let me tell you all about it. He came with a company of gentlemen a fortnight ago. I had it from Mrs. Long and then Mrs. Philips confirmed it was a shooting party and none of the ladies accompanied them. But, oh, Lizzy, we were in such a state, for Mr. Bingley resided three days in the neighbourhood and still he did not call! Well, I said it was all your father's fault. If he had not gone and died, he would be there where he belonged and could have called on Mr. Bingley. Yes, yes, it was all his fault." She paced back and forth in the drawing room waving her kerchief around to punctuate her speech.
"Mamá!" Jane remonstrated, for all the good it accomplished. I shook my head and with a meaningful look at my sister, I attempted to return my mother to the point of her conversation
"And so Mr. Bingley did not call upon any of you?"
"Oh, but he did, Lizzy. On the fourth day of his sojourn, Kitty looked out the window and what do you think she saw? None other than Mr. Bingley riding up the path to Longbourn on his dappled mare! Oh, he was mighty pleased to see Jane again. It was all as plain as day. No one could mistake his preference for her."
"Mamá!" Once again Jane wore an imploring expression about her countenance.
I watched Mr. Darcy retreat to the window, that shell of disapprobation descending upon his countenance. Why could my mother not learn to curb her tongue?
The arrival of the Gardiners that afternoon provided not only welcome guests, but distractions for both Mamá and Mr. Darcy. He spent no little time reacquainting my uncle with Pemberley's grounds and if it had not been snowing, I think they would have fished the lake dry just to be outdoors, away from a house filled with women. It was the third day of my family's visit before Jane and I found time alone. That afternoon, Georgiana and Mary practiced a duet, Mamá listed Mr. Darcy's assets to Mrs. Gardiner once again and planned Jane's upcoming nuptials even though she had not yet received a proposal, while Kitty entertained the younger Gardiners outdoors in the snowy garden. I tucked Jane's hand in my arm and whisked her off to a parlor in the east wing. From the window we could see my husband and uncle walk the path that led to the pond.
"Oh, Lizzy, are you truly as happy as you appear?" Jane asked.
My face was wreathed in smiles. "Truly. Jane, it is just as you hoped. I have come to love Mr. Darcy and, wondrous thought, he loves me in return."
"Of course he does! I knew he did the moment he asked for your hand at Longbourn."
"I confess that I did not. And I am afraid I behaved badly and made him miserable for quite some time."
"You, Lizzy? I cannot believe it!"
"Come, Jane, you know what a reluctant bride I was. Indeed, I acted terrible to him for no little time. It is a wonder he did not return to Longbourn and dump me on Mamá's doorstep with a list of complaints hung 'round my neck."
"Lizzy!"
I could not help smiling. "But he is too good, Jane, absolutely too good a man to do such a thing. He has borne my anger and suspicion and bad temper and won me over. He is truly the best of men."
"Oh, Lizzy, I am so happy for you," she said, but I could not mistake the wistful sound of her voice.
"And you? Your last letter made me alive with curiosity. What is this news you have to tell? Does it have to do with Mr. Bingley?"
She blushed and looked down at her hands in her lap. "He has not made a declaration to me, Lizzy, if that is what you mean. But I am happier than I have been in a long time."
"Because?"
"Because even though we were separated close to a year, when he did call upon us, it was like he had never gone away. I still believe I have never met a more amiable man in my entire life."
"And is he yet at Netherfield?"
"No, he returned to London last week, but he promised to come back to Hertfordshire with the new year."
"Oh, Jane, I cannot wait any longer. I must tell you this! Mr. Darcy has invited Mr. Bingley to spend Christmas with us. He comes to Pemberley tomorrow!"
The colour drained from Jane's face and her eyes grew larger and bluer than usual. "He is coming here?" she repeated.
I took her hands in mine. "You shall spend the next fortnight in each other's company every day."
"Oh, Lizzy, do you think that best? What about Mamá?"
I sighed and closed my eyes for a moment. "Jane, if Mr. Bingley loves you, he will have to accept your family. Mr. Darcy has learned that, and if he, of all men, can tolerate the Bennets, surely Mr. Bingley can."
We both laughed and I was grateful I could laugh, for three months ago I would never have believed such a deed possible.
~ * ~
Mr. Bingley did arrive the next day along with a new snowstorm. He walked into the great hall, his hat and coat dusted white within the short distance from his carriage to the door. A bitter wind blew in with him, causing the candles to flare up. Mr. Darcy and I had just left the breakfast room and crossed the hall when the door opened upon him. We were exceedingly pleased to see him and ushered him into the salon where my family had gathered after eating. I thought Mamá would suffer apoplexy upon first sight of Mr. Bingley; her mouth hung agape a full five minutes. Neither Jane nor I had warned her he was coming for fear it would only encourage her inappropriate remarks in the presence of Mr. Darcy.
I paid particular attention to the reaction of both Jane and Mr. Bingley upon seeing each other and was most gratified to see their eyes light up and witness the difficulty both of them had in tearing their gaze from each other.
Unfortunately, Mamá recovered her voice all too soon. "Mr. Bingley! You sly thing! Here you planned to follow Jane all the way to Derbyshire and never a word of it when last we visited."
"Mamá!" Jane and I both said in unison.
"How nice to see you again, Mr. Bingley," Mrs. Gardiner interjected smoothly, drawing him into the room. Her husband quickly stepped in, as well, and engaged him in a discussion of the road conditions. From then on, it was as though an unspoken agreement arose between my aunt and uncle, Mr. Darcy, and Jane and me to spare Mr. Bingley further conversation with my mother, a task most arduous, indeed.
The inclement weather forced the men to spend most of the coming days indoors, whereupon they made frequent use of Mr. Darcy's library and billiards room. Georgiana and I prevailed upon our female guests to assist us in trimming the Yule log with greenery in anticipation of its being lit on Christmas Eve. We also strung apples, twigs, and ribbons to decorate the holly bough so that it would be ready to hang from the ceiling in the main drawing room. We spent no little time in the stillroom selecting holly, ivy, bay and rosemary with which to adorn the house, and soon the fragrant herbal aromas permeated Pemberley in a most pleasing manner.
Mamá insisted upon adding mistletoe to the holly bough even though it had been long considered a "kissing-bough" without that accessory. "It will not hurt to provide added encouragement to the holiday tradition," she said, winking and raising her eyebrows in Jane's direction several times. I simply closed my eyes and shook my head, embarrassed for Jane's mortification, and yet helpless to control my mother. We would be fortunate if we got through the holidays without Mamá proposing to Mr. Bingley upon Jane's behalf!
