Badge of Honor

by Carol Steward

  “I’ll stay and help—” he offered, but Sarah cut him off.

  “Just go. I’ll get it done.” She set the ice pack on the table.

  “Go ahead, Nick,” the artist said in her gentle voice. “I’m used to this.”

  He gave a sigh of disgust, and his chair scraped the floor as he stood. “I’ll be in the report room,” he stated, then left.

  Sarah felt her skin heating again, and fought for control. She reached for the ice pack, hoping it would hide the flush on her face. The last thing she needed was for the police artist to turn her in for having a crush on her training officer. Sarah took a shallow breath, trying to calm her racing heart. Focus on the face. The suspect’s face. She tried again.

  Deep breath. Inhale. Exhale. Visualize…No, not Nick’s face!

  It was useless. She jumped from the chair and paced around the artist’s office. “I can’t get the last victim’s picture out of my mind.”

  The middle-aged woman smiled. “Funny, I was seeing Nick. It happens to his witnesses quite often,” she added. “There must be something about that voice of his,” she said dreamily. “But don’t let him intimidate you.”

  Sarah stared at her as if the woman had been reading her mind. “Is it hot in here?” She unbuttoned the costume at the neck and tried to tug it away from her skin.

  “Don’t worry. You’ll get over him. They all do, apparently. I mean, he’s not married. He must have some awful trait that scares women away.”

  Sarah felt the tension ebb. “Yeah, he’s a cop. Who’d want to marry one of us?”

  “There you go.” M.J. said with a laugh. “Come on, I’ll walk you through it again. I can guarantee my voice won’t be a distraction.”

  “Thank you,” she said as she settled across the table from the woman, a smile still on her face.

  “You’re at the carnival. What’s it like?” M.J. asked casually.

  Sarah took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “I smell fried chicken, cotton candy…liquor…marijuana….” She imagined her phone ringing, but refused to answer it. Even in her mind, Nick Matthews was a distraction. “I looked around for someone fitting the description given by the last victim. I had to brush the feathers out of my face. Then I saw him nuzzled up to the girl in the miniskirt.”

  Sarah paused. “In her picture on the Web site she was in a miniskirt, and I figured maybe she’d told him she’d be wearing one. I looked back at him, made the decision to approach…to bring him in for questioning.”

  “So you determined that he matched the factors you were looking for. What shape was his face?”

  “Square…Caucasian…thick eyebrows…” She continued until they had a sketch. When it was complete, she gave her approval and got up to go, only to find Nick waiting at the door.

  Despite M.J.’s promise that Sarah would get over him, her pulse went crazy again.

  SEVENTEEN

  “I’m going to change out of this costume and I’ll be ready to get back on patrol in a couple of minutes,” Sarah said, running down the hall before he could say a word. He smiled at the confident way she carried herself, even when dressed in a wacky chicken costume.

  “Good. I’ll wait in the lounge,” he said warily. The puffiness on her cheek was gone, he noted, but the skin was starting to bruise.

  Nick eyed M.J., who turned her back and started working on her computer.

  Something was going on.

  “Did things turn out okay?” he asked.

  She held up the sketch. “Perfectly.”

  “What’s her problem?”

  “She’s your partner. You need to ask her, Sergeant Matthews.”

  “Don’t ‘Sergeant Matthews’ me….”

  “I’m not your aunt in here, Nicky. Your presence was a distraction. I knew I could get what we needed without you, that’s all. Let me scan this in, and you can make copies.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “It means you need to get over your own issues, Nick. Not everyone is out to double-cross you, not everyone is…Never mind. Go talk to Sarah. It’s none of my business.”

  He thought of pushing, but knew the situation would only get more complicated. It was probably obvious to M.J. how he felt about Sarah. He’d never been a good actor.

  Nick waited in the officers lounge, more puzzled than he had been before. It was totally like his aunt to shoot it at him straight, with both barrels if need be. It wasn’t like her to claim anything wasn’t her business….

  When Sarah came out of the locker room, he handed her the keys to the police cruiser. “You certain you’re up to finishing the shift tonight?”

  “I’m okay. It’s not my first black eye, and I’m sure it won’t be my last.”

  “Let me look.”

  “It’s fine.” She turned her head, trying to keep him from seeing. But he gently lifted her chin and turned the injured area to the light. “How bad does it hurt?”

  “I’ve had worse in training. I’m good to go get this creep.”

  “I’ll just bet you are.” He paused, still holding her chin. “So what was the problem in there?”

  She pulled away and walked out of the station into the darkness. “I told you, I…” As her voice faded away, he followed.

  Out in the parking yard he couldn’t see her face as clearly, but at least they were out of range of anyone seeing or overhearing them. If she said what he hoped she would, privacy would be a definite plus. She couldn’t hide forever.

  “I had to have some time to replay what happened out there, before you showed up—when I was watching the guy. I couldn’t concentrate with you breathing down my neck.”

  Why hadn’t his aunt said that? “I’m tired of being left in the dark, Roberts,” he grumbled. “Trust goes both ways.”

  She turned toward him and nodded. “I’m glad you realize that, Nick,” she said. “Pardon me, Sergeant Matthews.” She ducked quickly into the cruiser and started the engine.

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked as he got in the passenger’s side.

  “It means I don’t need a guardian every minute. I know what I can and can’t do, on and off the job. Whose toes I can and can’t step on.” She pulled out of the parking lot onto the street, radioing dispatch of their available status.

  “It’s good to hear that. So what’s with going out there undercover without telling me?” He stared at her.

  “I didn’t tell you my idea last night, Sergeant, because I didn’t think the commander would approve it,” she said. “He said he’d fill you in when you showed up at the station.”

  “And he probably would have, had our suspect not called. You should have mentioned it when I phoned to get your location.” Nick was not ready for six more hours in the same car with the woman who was quickly capturing his heart.

  “I was too close to the suspect to reveal my status.”

  He stared straight ahead. “You can say that again. You’re too close to this case to be pushing, period, Roberts. It was one thing when another case led to evidence on your sister’s….”

  “That wasn’t what I was saying.” She turned onto University Avenue to patrol their usual route, then radioed dispatch once again, to find out who else had been covering the area.

  While they waited for a response, Nick let her have it. “No? Well, maybe it’s what you should have been saying. Or maybe you’d like to go back to explaining why I was sent out of the room when you—”

  “I’m not thinking about what I’d like, Sergeant. I’m trying not to step on your toes.”

  Twenty minutes of silence was broken by a call from dispatch.

  “Officer 318, suspicious activity at McKinley Elementary School. Possible fireworks being set off.”

  Sarah glanced down at the computer keyboard and pulled the radio mike from the clip on the dash. “Copy. En route. Who is the reporting party?”

  “It was a concerned driver,” the dispatcher said. “The name is on the file.”

 
; Sarah needed to change lanes to make the next turn, and didn’t have an opening. She switched on the red and blue lights and slowed down to cut behind the pickup next to her. “Traffic’s heavy at the moment. Would you look it up?”

  Nick turned the car-mount so he could read the computer. Just then a name popped up on their report: M. J. Daniels. His aunt. What was she up to now?

  He covered his brow with his hand and shook his head. Doggone it, M.J. I don’t need your help. Especially not now.

  “Any details of what we’re looking for?” Sarah asked. “Inside or outside the school?”

  “Negative, just suspicious lights and popping sounds,” dispatch relayed before Nick could skim the report.

  “Suspicious lights, great,” she said, and turned off University Avenue. “Sergeant Matthews? Everything okay? Was there a name of a contact?”

  “It was M.J., so I’m sure it’s legit. It’s probably a reflection or something, but we should check it out. We never know until we look.”

  She cut the flashing lights, turned onto McKinley Street and drove around the perimeter of the school yard. The second time around she said, “I don’t see anything, do you?”

  “No,” he said quietly, not sure how to explain his aunt to her.

  Sarah pulled into the next parking lot and radioed that they’d be out of the vehicle. “Do you smell any evidence of fireworks? Exactly what are suspicious lights going to look like? I mean, it’s not as if a prankster made the call, right?” she asked, a sarcastic tone to her voice. She walked several yards, the heavy, clublike flashlight in her hand, then stopped and stared at the main entrance.

  For a minute, he thought she’d actually seen something. Then she turned and crossed her arms over her chest.

  “Did you two set this up? There’s nothing here.”

  “No.” He shook his head. Trust works both ways. “I had nothing to do with it, but with M.J.…”

  “What did she tell you?”

  “She’s my aunt, Sarah.”

  She stared at him, working her jaw, pressing her lips together. “That’s par for the course, isn’t it? Is there anyone else on the force I should watch out for?” she asked, clearly annoyed, but understandably so. He’d expected her to explode.

  “You’ve probably already met both of my brothers, Kent and Garrett. Jared Daniels is my cousin. That’s all. Let’s check the doors of the building, take a walk and make sure she wasn’t calling in a legitimate concern. We need to clear the air, Sarah.”

  He could see panic on her face. She turned back toward the car, and he reached out and stopped her.

  “I want to know what really happened back there with M.J. For the record, she told me to talk to you and to deal with my own issues. I’m guessing that’s what this bogus call is about.” He stepped over, tested the front doors of the school, then walked beside her, circling the building. “So what was the problem?”

  Sarah glanced at him, her left eyebrow arched, as if she was trying to look innocent. “You don’t need to know,” she said firmly.

  Dispatch radioed for an ambulance to treat a bar fight at the Harvest Festival, and Nick turned his radio down. “I get the distinct feeling that I’m the only one in the dark on this. My aunt tells me I need to deal with my own issues, which is probably true. It’s a challenge just walking through those doors most days, but I’m doing my best. So what have I done wrong?”

  “This is one time you’d probably rather be in the dark….”

  “In case you haven’t figured one thing out about me yet, Sarah, I don’t give up, no matter how great the odds against me.” They came to the handicapped entrance. Nick pressed the automated button and the door clattered as if it was going to open.

  Sarah dropped her flashlight and drew her gun.

  “Whoa. I was just testing to see if it was locked. It’s okay.” Nick fought the urge to smile.

  He didn’t dare.

  She relaxed, lowering the Glock to her side.

  “Sorry. I really didn’t mean to…”

  “Test my reactions?” She put the gun into her holster and picked up the flashlight. “Afraid I’m getting sluggish?”

  Nick was more afraid of her than she realized. Of what he was feeling for her. Of what she wanted from him. And why his aunt had sent them out here on a wild-goose chase. “That’s the last of my worries, Roberts.” He waited, challenging her to pick up their conversation where it had left off. “Why are you afraid of telling me what happened in there?”

  “Trust me, Sergeant. I’m not afraid. But you don’t want to know. Especially not now. Probably not ever.”

  He took a step closer and looked into her big brown eyes. “If you weren’t my trainee, would this be an issue?” He needed to know if he was right.

  “But I am, Nick.” She spoke gently. “Until this phase of my training is over, this conversation should not be taking place.” This time she didn’t correct herself. “I’m not even sure how soon after this phase we could have this conversation, but I told you from the very beginning, I’m not going to do anything to hurt you or your career. And I mean that.” She walked around him, proceeded to the next entrance of the school and checked it. “So let’s finish this call and get back out on the streets.”

  He wanted to kiss her, right here and now, but knew better than to do something so stupid. “Tell me what happened, Sarah….”

  She kept walking toward the next entrance, but finally turned and met his eyes without flinching. “I couldn’t get you out of my head. And every time you said something, it got worse. There, are you happy?”

  “That’s it?”

  “It’s kind of a problem when every time I tried to describe the suspect, all I could see in my mind was how mad you were when you discovered I was the chicken….” She shook her head. “I’m sorry I made a mess of everything.”

  He moved closer and touched her bruised cheek gently. “I was mad because I was worried about you, Sarah. I didn’t used to understand why they have the rule that couples can’t serve on the same shift. After tonight, I get it. It’s next to impossible to focus on the job when your partner is in jeopardy. Until you came along, I didn’t think it could get any worse than defending another officer. It can.”

  She turned her head and briefly pressed her lips to his fingers. “I know. I don’t want to hurt you, Nick. I’m so grateful that God provided this chance for me to get to know you, but it’s come with a huge price tag. I should have told you about my suspicions, but I’m not allowed to call you off duty during training. I—”

  “You might have had him if I hadn’t shown up at the wrong time. But we’re a step closer than we were twelve hours ago. If things stay quiet tonight, we’ll head in early and talk to Lieutenant Douglas.”

  “Your aunt could tell there’s something happening between us, Nick. How are we ever going to keep it from our supervisor?”

  “Knowing M.J., she was probably hoping to play matchmaker, more than having any real evidence.”

  “I don’t know, Nick. I must have been as transparent as glass. She assured me I’d get over you like they all do.”

  “What ‘all’ was she talking about?”

  Sarah shrugged. “She said you must have some awful trait that scares women away.” He heard the challenge in her voice. She was competitive, and not afraid to take anyone on. Not even a man a foot taller and at least a hundred pounds heavier.

  He crossed his arms over his chest. “Yeah? Did you take her seriously?”

  Sarah’s lip twitched. “I believe I laughed and claimed no one wants to marry a cop. Seems to be my experience, anyway.”

  Nick laughed in turn. “Right now, I think that’s pretty lucky for me. Either that, or God’s been working overtime to get us here.” He widened his stance, as if to keep her from pushing him away. “So do you really think you’d want to marry a cop?” His voice was painfully calm, his gaze steady. He didn’t realize until he’d spoken, that she could ask him the same question. He’d never
dated a female officer. He wondered if it could work. Would he be able to handle her putting her life on the line if he didn’t see her in action? If they weren’t there to back each other up?

  “Don’t even go there,” she declared, obviously unaware of how ardent her voice sounded.

  “I’d like to talk to the training supervisor, see if he could get you assigned to someone else, just to stay on the straight and narrow with the higher ups.”

  “It’s two more weeks, Nick. With four-day work weeks, that’s only eight more days that you’re my trainer. We’ll have this conversation after that. Please don’t risk your career.” She looked into his eyes, and in the moonlight he could see fear in her own. “What if what we’re feeling is a reaction to going through some stressful calls together?”

  “Is that what you think? Because I don’t.”

  Her eyes grew moist, and she shook her head. “I’ve had a crush on you since high school, Nick, so I’ve loved getting to know you these last few weeks. But—”

  “That’s a little creepy,” he said with a smile. “Because I had a crush on you, too. I was scared to death to ask you out, being I was just a lowly sophomore and you were a brainiac senior.”

  “I hope that’s a compliment.”

  “Oh yeah. Cute and brains, perfect combination.”

  Her face turned pink and she bit her lower lip nervously. “That’s so strange. Fourteen years later, and here we are, finally getting to know each other.”

  “Then why are you afraid that it can’t work out?” he asked, touching her arm. “Wouldn’t it be worth finding out?”

  “I’m terrified that you’d risk harming your career over me, and resent me because of it.”

  He didn’t know how to respond. What she said made sense, so why was it impossible to think of going along with her plan?

  “I don’t know how this department works with officer relationships,” she added, “but even if we decide to see each other after I’m done with my training, it would be wise to keep things pretty quiet for a while, wouldn’t it?”