New Money

by Lorraine Zago Rosenthal

  I heard noise behind him—a TV blaring and birds chirping and kids giggling in the distance. I wondered if he was on his fire escape, looking across the street at the Siamese cat that was always gazing through a window screen.

  “Do you mean with this conversation or with everything?” he asked.

  I swallowed, seeing his apartment and the kitchen table where we’d had our second kiss. I forced that image out of my head and took a deep breath.

  “Alex,” I said, “I think you know exactly what I mean.”

  Twenty

  I was looking at the remnants of my broken necklace scattered across my lap when Tony screeched into a spot in front of The Surrey and the car lurched forward.

  “What’s happened to you?” he asked. “A few weeks in high society and you’re blending right in.”

  I narrowed my eyes, staring at his boyish face. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “A few things. First off, why are you worried about Ned’s reaction to Alex canceling your date?”

  I shifted in my seat. “I’m not.”

  “It sure sounded that way when you were on the phone. It makes me think you were just using Alex to get a rise out of that guy. You know … bring a lowly bartender around to piss off the rich relatives. I suppose it’s even more effective when he’s their employee.”

  I’d thought about that when I invited Alex to Kitty’s party in the Hamptons. I’d relished breaking Ned’s we-do-not-fraternize-with-bartenders rule. But that wasn’t why I’d been seeing Alex, and I’d never, ever meant to use him. Still, the way Tony was looking at me made me feel like I was no better than that girl who’d strung Alex along just because it was fun.

  “I didn’t use him,” I said. “I liked him. I wanted to be with him.”

  Tony nodded. “I believe that. But the rest of it was a bonus, right?”

  I couldn’t listen to this. I reached for the door handle, but Tony popped the locks, trapping me inside. I stared straight ahead at a homeless man pushing a shopping cart filled with aluminum cans. That makes me so sad, Tina used to say.

  “My second point,” Tony went on, “is that I don’t like the way you’ve changed. You ditch your best friend for your new boyfriend, and then you screw things up with him because he doesn’t do exactly what you want. I think you’re getting accustomed to being a Stone.”

  I shook my head. “You don’t understand. Alex blew me off tonight because he—”

  “Yeah, I heard. He has to go to Queens.”

  Tony sounded like he understood something I didn’t. “Why is that an acceptable excuse? Who’s in Queens? His ex-wife? His friend with benefits?”

  “Savannah,” Tony said, “you’re too smart to be a psycho girlfriend with paranoid suspicions … none of which are valid.”

  “Then why is it more important for Alex to go to Queens than to keep his date with me?”

  Tony was quiet for a moment as he pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. “I don’t know exactly what he’s doing there tonight, but I’m sure I can guess. And I can’t tell you more than that because when you first got together, he asked me not to,” he said finally. “What I can say is that your mistake was not having any faith in Alex, and his was not being up-front with you. But if you want to do the right thing, call him back and tell him everything’s okay.”

  I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t call Alex, and I couldn’t tell him everything was okay, because it wasn’t. I just wouldn’t go on caring about someone who’d take offense because I’d bought him a shirt that matched his eyes. And I refused to put myself in danger of falling any further for a man who’d keep a secret from me even though I’d told him most of mine.

  *

  Café Boulud’s front door was right beside The Surrey’s entrance. I walked past small tables on the sidewalk, under an awning, and through a front door that led to a restaurant with subdued, contemporary décor. There were intimate tables, flower arrangements in corners, and paintings of the French countryside on the walls. I struggled to get myself together as I followed a hostess past flickering candles and waiters memorizing orders. I tried not to be angry or sad or shaken, and I refused to unravel just because things with Alex had.

  I spotted Kitty and Ned, sitting at a corner table, drinking wine and holding hands and gazing lovingly at each other like they were in one of those TV commercials I’d seen for romantic weekend getaways in the Poconos. They seemed to be the prototype for a blissful marriage, but I knew better and so did Ned. The joke was on Kitty, and being part of that made me lose my appetite before dinner had even started.

  You can handle this. That’s what I kept hearing when the hostess pulled out my chair and handed me a menu while Kitty smiled at me.

  “Is Alex on his way?” she asked.

  Ned’s pale-green eyes were on mine. I picked up my napkin, flicked it into the air, and spread it across my thighs. “No,” I said breezily as my fingers trembled under the table. “Unfortunately, he couldn’t make it tonight. He isn’t feeling well.”

  Ned lifted an eyebrow. I opened my menu, and after we placed our orders Kitty had to go and mention Darcelle. “I haven’t heard from her since she left for Moscow,” she said. “Not even an e-mail. But she was acting weird right before that, anyway … sort of distant … and I felt like she was giving me the cold shoulder when I took her to lunch on her last day at work. It was so strange.”

  Ned didn’t flinch. He just straightened the lapels on his dark blazer. “I wouldn’t dwell on that, Kitty. I always thought she was nothing but a ditzy talking head who loved to barge into my office and brown-nose for a promotion.”

  And get nailed on your desk.

  Kitty’s cell rang. “Forgive me,” she said, glancing at the phone. “This is work related … it might take a while, so please start without me.”

  She left the table and crossed the restaurant in her simple black dress, holding the phone to her ear as she went through the front door that led to East 76th. Then the waitress brought our dinner, and I stared at my plate after she walked away.

  I couldn’t have been any less hungry. But eating was a good way to pass the time until Kitty returned, which I hoped would be soon. It was bad enough sitting across the table from Ned when she was here, but her absence made it even more awkward. So I got started, keeping my eyes on my food. It was so quiet in this corner of the restaurant that I could hear a cracking sound inside my jaw when I chewed.

  “What happened to Alex?” Ned asked.

  I gulped a chunk of Vermont chicken deux façons. I would’ve preferred to listen to my jaw than his voice.

  “I already told you. He’s sick.”

  Ned smiled with his mouth closed. “Sick of you, probably. He stood you up.”

  I slammed my left hand on the table. “Why do you have to say that?”

  “Because it’s true. You wouldn’t be so angry otherwise.”

  He looked at my right hand, which was clenched around a knife. I let it go and sighed.

  “You don’t know everything,” I said.

  He leaned forward. “I know more than you think. So I’ll stop teasing you and pass on some of the wisdom I’ve gained during thirty-three years as a Stone. That is … if you’ll let me.”

  I groaned. “Do I have a choice?”

  “Not really,” he said while he pressed his thumb into the cleft in his chin and rubbed it up and down, moving his eyes around the restaurant like he was formulating a speech. “The thing is,” he continued as he dropped his hand to the table and shifted his focus back to me, “there’s a reason why people with resources shouldn’t get involved with people like Alex. I’m afraid that things just can’t work between them and us. As I’m sure you’ve discovered since you’ve come into money, there are too many differences, and these differences result in problems and arguments and very hurt feelings.”

  I didn’t agree that I shouldn’t get involved with people like Alex, but it was painfully true that our differences had cause
d everything Ned had just said. Much of what Alex and I had fought about never would’ve been an issue if I didn’t have money. Still, I hated to believe Ned was right on any level whatsoever, and I wasn’t going to admit he might be.

  “That’s your opinion,” I said.

  “I think it’s yours, too. Remember I tried to keep you away from Alex during the gala? I’m sure you see now that it was for your own good.” He looked closely at my face. “Go ahead and cry, Savannah … you don’t have to try so hard to hold those tears back.”

  I sprang up from my seat, toppling my chair. “I’m leaving,” I said.

  People were looking at us. Ned glared at me like I was a total embarrassment. “Sit down,” he said calmly. “The only reason you’re angry is because I’m right about everything, and you know it. And if you leave, Kitty will get suspicious. Can you imagine how upset she’ll be if she finds out we aren’t as cozy as she thinks?”

  I glared back at him. He was right again, and I had to find a way to make it through this dinner without gutting him with my knife. So I picked up my chair and sat down. “Do you know how it feels to hear Kitty talk about Darcelle?” I asked. “I detest you for putting me in this position.”

  “May I remind you this deal of ours was your idea? And this is how it’s turned out: a lovely dinner with just the three of us.”

  “The deal was for Kitty’s sake,” I said, “so she wouldn’t know who you really are.”

  “Let’s not pretend you’re Saint Savannah. The deal was also for you … so I’d stay out of your way at work and let you keep collecting your inheritance and hold my tongue about whatever asinine decisions you choose to make. And I’ve kept the bargain. I didn’t say a word when you brought Alex to my wife’s birthday party—as distasteful as that was. I’ll do the same thing for the next loser with whom you decide to squander your pre-Botox years. Unless, of course, your heart is so broken from being stood up tonight that you’ve sworn off men.”

  He chuckled. I wished he’d stop mentioning Alex, because I wanted to forget him.

  “You know what?” I said. “I can’t help what Edward did … so stop trying to get back at me for it.”

  That seemed to have blindsided him. His eyes narrowed and his mouth opened like he was about to say something, but he didn’t because Kitty slid into her chair, apologizing for taking so long.

  “I couldn’t get that guy off the phone,” she said, spreading her arms across the table to simultaneously squeeze my hand and Ned’s. “But I’m glad I was able to give you some time together. So what have you been talking about?”

  I felt a stab of nausea mixed with guilt. Ned smiled.

  “Savannah confided in me,” he said, “that Alex stood her up tonight. She was too embarrassed to admit it at first, but of course I assured her that we can be up-front about anything. I also gave her some brotherly advice, which was that any guy who’s callous enough to bail on a dinner to celebrate such an important achievement isn’t worthy of her.”

  How I loathed this man. Kitty squeezed my fingers tightly between hers. “Savannah,” she said, “I’m so sorry. And what Ned says is true … you don’t need somebody who’d treat you that way.”

  “Exactly,” Ned agreed. “Savannah’s not going to see him again. Isn’t that right?”

  The braised chicken I’d eaten earlier rose from my stomach into my throat, nearly choking me. I swallowed and clenched my teeth and felt like screaming.

  “Right,” I said.

  I faked friendliness for a while after that, and then I excused myself to the ladies’ room and lingered inside, wishing I could escape through a back door. But instead I just left the bathroom and headed toward the table, dragging my feet and keeping my eyes on the floor as I passed two men speaking French.

  “Savannah?”

  I spun around. Jack was standing there with a chef dressed in white.

  “Sympa de discuter avec vous, Jacques,” the chef said, shaking Jack’s hand.

  “Merci, toi aussi,” Jack replied with a smile.

  Then the man was gone, and Jack turned to me. “You know the chef?” I asked, because I was so surprised to see Jack that I couldn’t come up with anything else to say.

  “He’s the owner,” Jack said. “So what are you doing here?”

  He smelled the way he usually did—of cologne and Scotch and cinnamon. His skin was darker and his hair was blonder than the last time I’d seen him. He looked like he’d just returned from a week on the white sand of some exotic island. Or maybe he’d climbed to the top of a snow-peaked mountain like in that picture I’d noticed at his house.

  “Having dinner with Ned and Kitty,” I said.

  “Dinner with Ned? That must mean he’s gotten over your deadly right hook.”

  Jack smiled, but I didn’t. There was nothing to smile about, and he had believed Ned over me, and maybe Ned’s idea of swearing off men was a good one. I turned around and started walking, but Jack followed me and blocked my way.

  “Hey,” he said gently, “aren’t you ever going to have a real conversation with me again?”

  “Probably not.”

  He let out a chuckle. “You’re not still upset about what happened at my house, are you? That was all a big misunderstanding.”

  I sighed, folding my arms across my chest. “Yes, it was … and it was also partly my fault. I should’ve told you who I was right away … but you shouldn’t have sided with Ned.”

  Jack nodded. “You’re right, Savannah. I shouldn’t have … and I’m sorry.”

  I blinked. This was so unexpected. But if he was trying to win me over, he was wasting his time.

  He took a step closer. “I saw you at Kitty’s birthday party. You didn’t even say hello.”

  “Oh, didn’t I? Neither did you.”

  “I didn’t want to intrude,” he said. “You were with your boyfriend. Is he here tonight?”

  I shook my head. “He’s not my boyfriend anymore.”

  “Really,” Jack said slowly. “What happened?”

  “We had a fight because he stood me up. But I don’t care,” I said, tossing my hair and reminding myself of Tina. I sounded hard and tough even though I didn’t feel that way. I was holding back the tears that Ned had been goading me to let out.

  Jack lifted his hand and ran his finger down the side of my face. I backed away, because it made me feel something and I didn’t want to. But he didn’t let me go. He slid his hand to my wrist and kept me close to him.

  “I’d never treat you that way,” he said as I stared at the amber flecks in his eyes. “But I have to admit I’m not surprised Alex did. He’s not exactly squeaky-clean.”

  I stared at him, waiting for an explanation. “Am I supposed to guess what that means?”

  He let go of my wrist and leaned against the wall. “I’m sure you know he’s a fighter.”

  I nodded. “I know. But he quit a while back.”

  “Yeah,” Jack said, “after he paralyzed someone during a cage fight in New Jersey.”

  Was it freezing in here all of a sudden, or was it just me? And why was my mouth so dry that it was impossible to form words?

  “Are you okay?” Jack asked. “You’ve gone pale. I didn’t mean to shock you.”

  “You did,” I said. “But if you have more to tell me … I want to hear it.”

  “Well,” he went on, “I mentioned when we met that I’d heard something about him, but I didn’t want to spread gossip. Since then I had a source of mine check into it … and the rumor is true. He put another fighter in a wheelchair … permanently. From what I’ve heard, it was a pretty vicious brawl … Alex ended up losing his spleen, and he broke the other guy’s spine.”

  I swallowed hard. I’d touched Alex’s scars, but that was as far as he’d let me in.

  “Didn’t you ever look him up online?” Jack said.

  “I try not to do that. Sometimes it’s all lies—”

  “This isn’t a lie, Savannah. There wasn’t much written
about it since they were just amateur fighters, but I was able to get the inside story. It was an accident, of course … but because you were dating, he should’ve mentioned it. I’m sorry I had to be the one to tell you.”

  “Yes,” I said, my voice ringing in my ears, “I am, too.”

  *

  Jack said something about calling me tomorrow before he followed me back to my table to say hello to Ned and Kitty. He stood there for a few minutes, chatting and laughing with them as I stared into space and my body quivered beneath my dress. Then he went back to his table, and I somehow made it through dinner without fainting or throwing up or ripping my hair out of my head. When it was over, I walked out to East 76th, where Tony drove up in the sedan. I opened the door and slid inside before he came to a full stop.

  “What are you doing?” he asked.

  “Why didn’t you tell me why Alex quit fighting?” I said. “Why didn’t you tell me he hurt somebody?”

  Tony sighed. “Who just couldn’t wait to tell you about that? Ned Stone?”

  “It wasn’t Ned, and it doesn’t matter. What matters is that Alex kept it from me. He’s a liar, and don’t you ever lecture me again that I made a mistake by not having faith in him, because he doesn’t deserve any.”

  “Savannah,” Tony said, “calm down. Alex never meant to hurt that guy … it just happened. Unfortunately, it’s an occupational hazard.”

  One of Tony’s library books was under my feet. I kicked it away. “I know that. What I don’t know is why he kept it from me. I just wasn’t interested anymore—that’s what Alex said when I asked why he stopped fighting. Now I can’t believe a word that ever came out of his mouth. God only knows what he’s really doing tonight.”

  “I talked to him while you were at dinner,” Tony said. “And what he’s doing … it’s something important.”

  “What is it? Tell me.”

  He shook his head. “It’s not my place to do that. You’ll just have to trust me.”

  Trust him? I was starting to think I couldn’t trust anyone. “No,” I said, “I don’t trust you. I used to, but not anymore. You were pushing that relationship from the beginning, when all along you were just as deceitful as he was. So do me a favor and stop giving me advice. Maybe it was a mistake for us to be friends. Maybe we’ve gotten too familiar with each other.”