Monkey Business [Drunk Monkeys 1] (Siren Publishing Ménage Everlasting)

by Tymber Dalton

  She could sleep late on Saturdays and Sundays.

  Lather, rinse, repeat.

  I’m sooo in over my head.

  She just hoped she didn’t lose her head, or get any of these men hurt or killed, before she finally made it back to Chicago.

  Chapter Twenty

  That afternoon, Tango and Doc took Celia outside to the backyard.

  “While we’re waiting,” Doc said, “We can do a little training.”

  “Training?”

  “You’re staying with us,” Tango said, “you need some basic skills, at least.”

  She didn’t want to voice her thought that she’d have to return to the States soon, so what was the point?

  Anything she could learn, to keep their trust, wasn’t a waste of time, she supposed.

  They started working with her on some basic self-defense techniques.

  “Do you know anything?” Tango asked.

  “A couple of things.” She knew one or two moves already, quick moves designed to break contact with an urban mugger, but she’d never needed them in real life.

  “Let’s see,” Doc said.

  Turned out it was a good thing she’d never needed them against a real-life mugger, because her movements were totally ineffectual against the two skilled men.

  Tango stepped back after pinning her yet again, shaking his head in disgust. “I can see we need to start the snowflake here with baby steps,” he said as Doc offered her a hand to help her up off the ground yet again.

  “Gee, thanks.”

  “Well, you do,” Tango said. “Look how we grabbed you. If you’d known anything, we couldn’t have swooped in like we did and scooped you up. You would have spotted us before we even got to that point.”

  “How? I didn’t even know you were watching me!”

  “Our point exactly,” Doc said. “You need to learn better observational skills. We were tailing you from when you walked out to your car at the hotel and followed you all the way to the supermarket.”

  She blushed.

  She seemed to do that a lot lately, something she hadn’t had a problem with before now.

  She also didn’t have a snarky comeback for them.

  Three hours later, she was exhausted and filthy from the workout. She needed a shower before cooking dinner.

  As she stood under the spray and took inventory of her bruises and bumps from the self-defense lesson, the full extent of exactly how far in over her head she was truly sank home. Just when she thought she couldn’t feel any more worthless, she found a new tunnel to uncharted depths.

  At least the men had unintentionally reached second base with her more than a few times during the lessons.

  Yeah, that was kind of fun.

  And she’d learned some things, earning both men’s approval on her vast improvement by the time Doc called an end to the session.

  Although she suspected she’d be paying for it in the morning in terms of sore muscles.

  They told her that tomorrow they’d be working with her with a knife, teaching her how to use it for protection. She wasn’t sure that was a great idea if she thought about how clumsy and unskilled she was, but hell, she’d consider it research and go through it without complaint.

  Before dinner, Tango once again ran over to the hotel to go rumple her room. This time he returned sooner. “I parked farther away and walked in,” he explained to her. “Didn’t have to worry about someone spotting a car like I did yesterday.”

  She was glad he’d read the question in her face. She wasn’t sure her jaw would work to speak. Eating would be painful enough as it was.

  She just nodded and let it go.

  After dinner, Papa and Lima helped her check her e-mail. Mike had responded with a brief reply that there wasn’t any new information, and that he’d told Carole she was fine and safe.

  She quickly drafted a reply, let Papa approve it, and hit send.

  Then, she thought she might stay up and try to talk to Dr. Quong or Papa for more information for her eventual story, but she realized she was yawning even earlier than the night before.

  “It’s catching up with you,” Doc said. “No surprise there.”

  She wanted to stay up, but then excused herself to the bedroom. As she settled, alone, in the middle of the bed, she thought surely she’d wake up when the men came to bed.

  However, when she opened her eyes the next morning to that early purply light, both men were snoring on either side of her.

  She’d never felt them come to bed.

  Huh. Wow, I must have been exhausted.

  She was also so sore she could barely move. At first, she thought she might have to break down and climb over Tango and risk waking him up to get out of bed. Eventually she got herself into an upright seated position and was able to crawl out the end of the bed and not fall on top of the guy asleep on the floor.

  This morning, she headed for the bathroom and took a hot shower, hoping it would loosen her muscles and stop their screaming protests.

  A knock on the bathroom door startled her. It didn’t have a lock, but the men so far had been excellent about knocking first. She’d noticed it wasn’t uncommon for someone to go in and use the toilet if another man was in the shower, allowances needing to be made for the number of people under the same roof with only three bathrooms between them.

  She heard Doc’s voice. “I have coffee and ibuprofen. Mind if I set them on the counter for you? I won’t look.”

  She thought she might cry from the thoughtful gesture. “Please. Thank you.”

  She didn’t even hear the door open, although the way the shower curtain waved slightly as a cool breeze filtered around it betrayed his entry.

  When she looked a moment later, he’d closed the door behind him, and three tablets sat on the counter next to a steaming mug of coffee.

  She reached out and grabbed the tablets, swallowing them with a mouthful of warm shower water. By the time she climbed out a few minutes later and made it to the kitchen, Doc was ready to give her a stick test, and Papa was apparently done with his morning tai chi.

  Darn.

  She’d looked forward to watching him, even if she was now in too much pain to try to play along.

  “You all right?” Papa asked.

  “I can’t be dead, because I hurt too much,” she said.

  Tango laughed. “We’ll work the kinks out of you today.”

  “Is that a threat or a promise?” she shot back.

  “Let those pills take the edge off for her first,” Doc said. “Give her a break. She did great for her first day. And she’s vertical. That’s five you owe me, buddy.”

  Tango grumbled. “Add it to my tally.”

  “What?” she asked.

  “He bet me five bucks you’d spend at least part of the day in bed before getting up. I told him I didn’t think so, that I bet you’d get up.”

  She stuck her tongue out at Tango, who grinned. “Nothing personal, snowflake,” he teased. “I’m suitably impressed. You did good. Let’s see if you can do as well today.”

  If he was trying to manipulate her into trying another session with them, well, it worked. She wouldn’t give Tango the satisfaction of her wimping out.

  Although they might have to carry me inside again later.

  They waited until after breakfast for her lesson. They started with helping her stretch out. The men worked on loosening knotted myofascial trigger points in her muscles, techniques that both hurt like a motherfucker and gave her almost instantaneous pain relief at the same time.

  She wasn’t sure why that worked, but she wouldn’t question it. This was the most physical activity she’d had in years.

  Which also explained her pear shape, from all the time she spent at her desk and on her ass. The only thing that kept her even remotely from gaining weight was the walking she had to do on a daily basis.

  If she survived her time with the men—and at her current rate she wasn’t sure she would even survive the train
ing sessions—she made a promise to herself that she’d do a better job getting into and staying in shape. Climb more stairs. Get off the train at an earlier stop and walk. Something.

  Anything so she never again had to feel this out of shape and unconditioned again.

  The men scared the crap out of her with the knife training, and had even given her a small multitool pocketknife of her own to carry with her.

  That night, she didn’t even bother asking about sending Mike an e-mail. As soon as dinner was finished, she went to collapse in bed.

  * * * *

  Doc had to force himself not to laugh at Celia as he, Tango, and Papa watched her limp down the hall. Once they heard the bedroom door close, Doc shook his head.

  “Poor kid.”

  “It’s a brave new world,” Tango said. “Monkey-eat-monkey.”

  “Don’t push her to the breaking point,” Papa warned. “It’ll make it easier on her later.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  Papa tipped his head toward the hall. “Didn’t want to say this in front of her. Lima thinks someone might be on her trail. We can’t let her leave. Her itinerary was part of the intel we got. If we got it, someone else probably did, too.”

  “What do we do?” Tango asked.

  “We’ll have to take her with us to our new location when we leave Australia. Get her back into the US that way. Otherwise, they’ll just grab her when she tries to board her flight home, or in customs when she hits LA.”

  “Problem,” Tango said. “If they have that information, they’ll have her address in Chicago.”

  “I know, but unless she wants to stay with us permanently, I don’t have a better answer for you.”

  Doc frowned. “Is that really an option?”

  Papa shrugged. “We’re OTG. All the rules are out the window. I won’t force her to stay once we’re clear of Australia, but I’m not going to kick her out when there’s a reasonable chance she might be harmed or killed, either.”

  Doc caught himself before he said out loud that he thought her joining them permanently was a perfectly damn fine idea.

  He wasn’t sure if or how it would work, or if she’d even go along with them on it, but he was damn sure willing to try.

  Hopefully, Tango would follow his lead. He’d noticed how the man looked at her, watched her. It was more than her being their responsibility.

  Hell, he’d even heard the way Tango had softly inhaled when they climbed into bed the night before, smelling her hair that had spilled onto his pillow before gently moving it so he didn’t lie on it.

  I need to plan.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  The next six days without progress on the mole situation found Doc growing increasingly nervous. He felt they should be moving to another location, especially since they had Quong.

  That wasn’t the main cause of his nerves. Time was growing short in another way.

  Celia.

  The more time he spent with her, as crazy as it sounded even just thinking it in his brain, he knew there was no way in hell he could let her simply walk out of their lives. She wasn’t just some clueless reporter wannabe.

  She had faith, she had tenacity, she had a belief that she could make a difference in the world. That she could fix this. Or at least help fix it.

  They needed more people like that. People they could trust.

  People like her.

  She was in the shower when Doc grabbed Tango and pulled him outside to talk.

  “What is so important we have to come out here, dude?”

  “Her.”

  “Her what?” Tango’s gaze narrowed. “Is there a problem? She breaking the deal?”

  “No. That’s just it. I don’t want the deal to end. How would you feel about talking her into staying?”

  He felt a wall go up inside of Tango. The man leaned back and suddenly found his shoes very interesting. “Don’t quite know what you’re talking about. You know she’s going to have to stay with us until we find out what the mole knows about her. Papa said she’ll leave Oz with us.”

  “Bullshit you don’t know what I’m talking about. Her. She’s perfect for us.”

  “We’re a SOTIF unit that’s now OTG. We’ve already got one civvie whose life we have to protect. We don’t have time for another one. And let’s not forget we need to arrange something for Quong’s family, too, to keep them safe.”

  “Again, bullshit. Look me in the fucking eyes and say that.”

  Tango didn’t look up.

  “I knew it,” Doc said. “You have it bad for her, too. You like her.” Well, the truth was he thought maybe he was falling in love with her, but he could wait to make that admission.

  So he didn’t look so…you know…

  Crazy.

  Tango shrugged. “She’s an attractive woman. Why wouldn’t I like her?”

  Doc leaned in.

  Tango’s gaze darted down again. His tell, and one only Doc knew about.

  “Admit it,” Doc said.

  “Okay, fine!” He glared at Doc. “I like her, all right? Is that what you wanted to hear?” He got in Doc’s face. “It’s going to rip my fucking heart out when we eventually have to say good-bye to her.”

  “Maybe we don’t need to.”

  Tango frowned. That same look he sometimes got when he was trying to do a sudoku puzzle and he couldn’t quite figure it out. “What the fuck? What are you saying?”

  “The rules are out the fucking window now, right? For the whole damn world. For the military, as far as we’re concerned right now. For us. I say we don’t say good-bye to her. I say we talk her into staying with us as part of our team. With us, you and me. Permanently.”

  “She’s not a damn fighter! She could have just as easily gotten mugged and killed her first fucking day in Melbourne, and you want to take our act long-term on the road with her?”

  “She can learn. You said it yourself she was a fast learner. She never had a reason to have any more than basic urban street sense before.”

  “She doesn’t even have that! I’m surprised she never got her ass mugged in Chicago.”

  “We teach her. We protect her.” He knew he might regret saying this, but he had to. “Because we like her a hell of a lot more than we should.”

  He knew his words had hit the mark when he saw Tango flinch.

  His partner’s wall crumpled. “What are you suggesting?” Tango asked.

  “I’m suggesting we go after her. We give her every reason to stay with us, not because she has to, but because she wants to. What does she have if she returns to Chicago? If we knew about her, and with a mole in the food chain, she’s in danger. Her sister and her family are in danger. She’s in danger. You heard what Papa said. He won’t make her leave. She can stay with us. She’s smart and reasonable. She’ll agree to it. I know she will.”

  “You don’t know that.”

  “I have a pretty damn good idea.”

  * * * *

  Tango not only thought Doc was crazy, he thought Doc might just be onto something.

  Maybe the best damned idea Tango had ever heard.

  Ever.

  He didn’t fear much in life. He didn’t want to die. He wasn’t scared of it, either. Flying sucked, but that was a logical, rational survival instinct.

  But every time he’d thought about Celia walking out of their lives and never seeing her again, especially when he strongly suspected if she did that she would likely be picked up by someone and then tortured and killed to get whatever information they thought she might have?

  It made him sick to his stomach.

  Worse, it scared the crap out of him.

  “Okay,” Tango said. “So what do we do to convince her she should stay with us for the long haul?”

  Doc smiled. “You in?”

  “I’m in.”

  “If she agrees, of course. We won’t force her.”

  “Of course.”

  Doc nodded. “Good.”

  “
Again, what do we do?”

  “We talk to her and lay our cards on the table. We tell her we like her, and that if she likes us back she’s got a permanent place here in the group, with us.”

  “And if she shoots us down?”

  “She won’t.”

  “Be realistic,” Tango warned.

  “I am. I refuse to consider that she might say no. You heard her talk about assholes who used and left her in the past. So what does she have waiting for her at home?”

  “Her life.”

  “Her old life. We have a chance to really make a difference in the whole world. And she has a chance to be a part of it.”

  Tango had never seen Doc so worked up before.

  Glad I’m not the only one who has it so bad for her.

  “Yeah,” Tango drawled, “all we can offer her is danger and a potentially horrifying death by Kite, or Kiters.”

  “And a chance to do what she really wants to do, which is make the world a better place.”

  “Fine. You lead the way, smart guy.”

  * * * *

  Celia stood under the hot spray of water, eyes closed, mind wandering.

  She wished she could slow down time.

  Hell, wished she could stop time.

  Well, without dying to do it.

  She couldn’t stay here in Australia forever. Logistically, she had a job to get back to. A story to break.

  A career to make.

  Kids who I love and moon over who aren’t even mine.

  There was that. She didn’t begrudge her sister’s family. She loved Daryl and the kids.

  But would she ever have a chance of her own like that? Real love?

  If I do make it big, how do I know they’re after me and not my job or money or reputation once this story breaks?

  She rested her forehead against the tiled wall. That was something she hadn’t thought about before.

  Not thinking things through seems to be a repetitive problem of mine.

  Oh, not thinking things through was going to get her in bad trouble one of these days if she wasn’t careful.

  Like falling in love with two military hunks she could never have more than lusty thoughts about.