Tales from the Bottom of My Sole

by David Kingston Yeh

  “What?”

  “I invited my musical theatre friend Adam, one thing led to another, and now practically the entire ensemble from the Mirvish production of Mamma Mia! is here. I honestly can’t personally be held responsible if they burst into song. Xavier, Xavier! I want to introduce you to my good friend Daniel.” A scruffy-looking teenager in a black T-shirt and baseball cap shook my hand.

  “Xavier does the Québécois voiceover work for Ron Weasley in all the Harry Potter movies,” Parker said. “How exciting is that? Xavier, please tell your father that Lissa has his mixtape all ready for him.” The boy saluted and sauntered off. “Lissa’s one of my DJs, the one over there in the fabulous shoes. If you want to know anything going on in Toronto’s music scene, she’s your go-to-girl. Daniel, walk with me, let me fetch you a drink. My friends Grant and Harvey run a micro-brewery out in Dufferin Grove and they’ve been stocking the bar all day. Here, try this.” Parker plucked a bottle out of a shining tub of ice, uncapped it and stood back expectantly. “It’s their signature craft ale.”

  I read the label. “Beaver Bum?”

  “I’m told it has undertones of caramel and mocha, with just a hint of vanilla. Hence, the moniker. Apparently, someone discovered if you pair it with Kyle’s sea-salt peanut brittle, the combination is to die for.”

  “Thanks. Cheers.” I handed him the Bacardi. “This is for you. Parker, what are you wearing?”

  “Daniel, OMG.” Parker clutched the rum as if I’d just handed him baby Jesus. “Your timing is impeccable. My mojitos are a huge hit but I was just beginning to worry we might run out. What am I wearing? This is a traditional, straight-cut Punjabi kurta. My mother made it for me for my high school graduation. I’ve worn it twice in my life, this being occasion number two. What do you think?”

  “You look great.”

  “Thank you. Peacock blue was always my favourite. It’s just a shade darker than cyan, which of course was Audrey Hepburn’s favourite colour. Your boyfriend’s brother and his girlfriend are by the buffet table, by the way, over there.” He hefted the rum. “Let me spirit this to my mixologist right now.”

  “Parker, are you okay? Do you need any help with anything?”

  “I,” Parker said, backing away, “am divinely and utterly okay.” A gust of wind sent floral napkins flying into the air. He peeled a sunflower from the side of his cheek and waved enthusiastically. “Enjoy!”

  In one corner of the rooftop, a small group of guests gathered by a DJ table, tapping their toes to bright, gambolling jazz. I caught a glimpse of the DJ bent over his turntable and made a point of turning my back. Luke Moretti and Ai Chang Cho were poised over a hummus platter talking with two big girls wearing matching, black-and-white party dresses: one in polka dots, the other in stripes.

  “Daniel!” Luke said. “How’re you doing? We were starting to wonder if you would make it.”

  “I know you,” the first girl said, pushing her glasses up her nose. “You’re the Reluctant Kilt Boy.”

  “And you,” I replied, “are the Lollipop Girl.”

  “I suppose I was. Very good memory. And how was your Valentine’s event?”

  “Our outfits were a hit.”

  “I’m glad to hear that. And is your cute boyfriend with you today?”

  “David’s travelling in Europe right now.”

  “How debonair. Well, I am Jen and this is my partner-in-nefarious-crime, Tracey.”

  Tracey was platinum blonde and Jen was a russet brunette. Otherwise the two might’ve been sisters. But their ornate, matching wedding rings indicated otherwise. Tracey was wearing a veiled pillbox hat secured with jewelled pins. “You’re both designers, right?” I asked.

  “We’re JT Jewellery,” Tracey said. “Borderline Plus carries our whole line.”

  “I see you’ve met Luke and Ai Chang.”

  “Ai Chang,” Tracey said, “is a very old friend of ours. Isn’t that right, Ai Chang?”

  Ai Chang blinked. “Oh yeah, we met minutes ago.”

  “Reluctant Kilt Boy?” Luke said.

  Jen raised one perfectly manicured finger. “Fashion is the armour ...”

  “... to survive the reality of everyday life,” Tracey concluded.

  I wasn’t sure what to say. I was wearing jeans and a polo shirt from Mark’s Work Warehouse. “Luke’s my boyfriend’s brother.”

  “There is,” Tracey said, “most definitely a family resemblance.”

  “Although,” Jen said, “I suspect you’re the big brother.”

  “Is it that obvious?” Luke asked.

  “Not precisely,” Tracey said, leaning in with a studious expression. “But one can always spot the older souls.”

  “Bill Cunningham,” Ai Chang said.

  Jen peered over her glasses. “Very good.”

  “What?” Luke and I said.

  Ai Chang folded her arms and pointed. “They just quoted Bill Cunningham.”

  Jen and Tracey regarded each other, nodded once, and took Ai Chang by the elbows.

  “Why don’t we leave you two boys for a moment,” Jen said. “I think we girls may have a lot to talk about.”

  “Ai Chang’s wearing one of their chokers,” Luke said as we watched the two escort her away.

  “That’s a coincidence.”

  He poked at the hummus with a carrot stick. “Not really. She’s a big fan of designers. She spotted them earlier and introduced herself.”

  “A big fan?”

  “Ai Chang’s a fashion maven, it’s her life. She’s been following their blog for a while. It’s not my thing, but I get it. It’s what she’s passionate about.”

  “What’s with everyone and blogs these days?”

  Luke shrugged. “People like telling their stories, and people like reading them. It’s a way to connect. It’s what social media is all about: contact without intimacy. Personally, I prefer connecting face-to-face.” He threw a jab-cross-hook combo.

  “And how are you two doing?”

  “Ai Chang and me? Great. We’re officially back together again. But you figured that out already.”

  “I’m happy for you guys.”

  “Thanks. So are we.” Luke put on a pair of aviator sunglasses and leaned against a planter, his slicked back hair unruffled by the breeze. He was wearing buffed leather wingtips, his sleeves rolled up, and the top three buttons of his silver shirt undone.

  “You look good,” I said.

  “Thanks.” Luke nodded toward the DJ. “He seems popular with the ladies.” We both observed the laughing women gathered around the slim, curly-haired man behind the console.

  “Yeah,” I said. “He’s a charmer, alright.”

  Luke regarded me sidelong. “What’s up?”

  “I used to date him.”

  “No kidding.”

  “It was a long time ago.”

  “Your friend Parker says he’s one of the house DJs at the Drake Hotel.”

  “Is Sean still doing that? Good for him.”

  “I think he’s looking this way.”

  I sipped from my beer. “I’ll say ‘hi’ to him later, alright?”

  “Remind me,” Luke said, “how long have you and my brother been boyfriends?”

  “Three years. I moved in with him two years ago.”

  “And things are good?”

  “Yeah, they are. I mean, your mom just thinks I’m David’s roommate, right? But that’s okay for now. It’s not like we’re getting married or having kids or anything.”

  “No such plans?”

  “No, not yet.”

  “That’s too bad.”

  Behind his sunglasses, Luke’s expression was unreadable. I asked, mainly to be polite: “What about you and Ai Chang?”

  “Definitely, it’s in the works. We’ve been talking about marriage and parenting. We have a plan. All in good time. She’s got a lot on her plate right now.” He took out a cigarette case. “So, how is David? You hear from the kiddo?”

  Now I was
definitely taken aback. This was the first time Luke had asked anything about David, specifically.

  “Well,” I said, “we actually haven’t had a chance to talk much. He’s only called a couple times. They’ve been travelling around Sicily doing the tourist thing, but now they’re settled back on your grandparents’ farm. Your mom’s thrilled to be there. David says it’s like her whole personality has changed. He’s never seen her this happy before.”

  “Good for her.”

  “David’s been helping out the neighbours with their almond harvest. He’s also found a couple broken bicycles he’s been fixing up. He’s having a good time.”

  “The Sabatinis.”

  “What?”

  “The neighbours are the Sabatinis. They’re really old friends of the family.”

  “Okay.”

  Luke slipped a cigarette between his lips. “By the way, I’m going.”

  “You’re leaving?”

  “I’ve been thinking about this a lot. After the shoot tomorrow morning, I’m going to Italy.”

  “Italy. As in Palermo, Italy?”

  “As in, yeah, I’m going to meet up with David and my ma.”

  “Holy shit. Luke.”

  “You sound surprised.”

  “Shouldn’t I be?”

  “Daniel, c’mon. You’ve been on my back about this reunion thing ever since I got here.”

  “On your back?”

  “Yeah, going on and on about your grandparents and brothers, and sticking those Palermo pics on the fridge where I had to look at them every day. Christ, you wouldn’t fucking let up.”

  “Those were postcards from David.”

  “It’s all good.” Luke lit his cigarette and snapped shut his lighter. “You actually got me thinking. I’m thirty years old already, y’know what I mean? What have I got to be afraid of anymore? I mean, go big or go home, right? Also, Ai Chang, well, she convinced me I was making a huge mistake.”

  “How’d she do that?”

  “See, a few years back, she won this grant to Canada’s top fashion school in Vancouver. But she almost didn’t go because her family didn’t approve.”

  “But she did go.”

  “That’s right, she went anyway. Her parents still don’t get it. They still think she’s throwing her life away. Did you know she used to work as a dental hygienist?”

  “That’s a career change.”

  “Yeah, I mean, who would’ve thought? The point is, she took a chance and grabbed life by the balls. So I started thinking, what if she’s right? What if not going to Italy turns out to be the biggest chicken shit mistake of my life? I’m good to travel. I changed up all my I.D. long ago. I’ve worked all my life to be Luke Moretti, y’know what I mean?”

  “You’re the Boss.”

  “I am the Boss. So I figured, what the hell.”

  “You only live once.”

  “Damn right.”

  “Your mom left you a ticket?”

  “No. But I went ahead and bought one anyway.”

  “Do they know you’re coming?”

  “Nope.”

  “When are you going to tell them?”

  “I’m not.”

  “What do you mean you’re not? You’re going to crash this family reunion?”

  “Well, technically, you can’t crash something you’re already invited to. But yeah, I’m going to crash this party. If things go south, then I walk away. Then I’ve got the rest of Europe to explore. Truth is, Ai Chang’s busier than ever right now, and I’ve got the time.” Luke rested a finger against my chest. “Don’t tell David.”

  “You like surprising people.”

  “I’ve been known to raise a few eyebrows. By the way, we just signed a lease for an apartment. After I come back from Europe, we’re moving in together.”

  “Congratulations.”

  “Thanks.”

  “Luke, you know,” I said, “some people don’t like surprises. A lot of people.”

  “Does it look like I give a fuck?”

  “How’s your Italian?”

  “Eccellente. Parlo italiano da quando ero un bambino. Le ragazze lo adorano.”

  “Okay, then.”

  “Ai Chang loves it when I talk dirty. You wanna know how to say, ‘Suck my cock’?” Luke took a drag off his cigarette, rested a hand on my shoulder and drew me close. “Succhiami il cazzo.”

  When I repeated it, he shook his head. “No, listen. You have to draw out the A, like this. Try again. Not bad. Hey, look at me.” He pursed his lips, then grimaced, showing his teeth. “Better. Again. Succhiami il cazzo.”

  I put down the Beaver Bum and mimicked his gesturing with both my hands, fingertips to thumb. “Succhiami il cazzo. Succhiami il cazzo!”

  He patted me on the cheek. “Perfetto.”

  Across the rooftop, Lissa dropped an ABBA track and half the guests burst into song. The wind picked up, upsetting even Luke’s pomaded hair. A flock of pigeons blossomed across the sky. Through the crowd, I caught Parker’s eye and pointed accusingly. He gesticulated in denial, elbows raised: It wasn’t me!

  But, of course, both of us knew that it was.

  “You’re telling me,” David said, “that Ai Chang’s morning photo shoot in our loft turned out to be all trans men modelling underwear?”

  “Yeah.”

  “And Luke didn’t warn you?”

  “Hold on a sec.” I sat up in bed and turned on my side lamp. It was 2:06 a.m. David was calling from a pay-phone in a supermarket in Palermo, where it was eight in the morning and pouring rain.

  “Well, I guess he just didn’t think there was anything to warn me about,” I said, rubbing the sleep from my eyes. “I mean, this was Ai Chang’s latest project, right? She likes to use transgender models. She also likes to photograph them in motion.”

  “In motion?”

  “It’s more dynamic, more natural, she says. Jumping around, dancing, doing parkour. She showed me her portfolio, it’s pretty amazing. She does all her own photography. Except they broke the couch.”

  “What?”

  “They were going at it on the couch and the frame collapsed. Don’t worry, no one got hurt.”

  “Great. I’m glad no one got hurt.”

  “It did get a little weird at one point.”

  “Oh?”

  “Well, see, Ai Chang had brought this whole assortment of underwear, along with three guys who’d volunteered to model for her.”

  “And Luke?”

  “Yeah, he was also part of the shoot. Anyway, so she was getting them to try on different pairs, right? Just so she could see who looked best in what. And of course all the models were different sizes. So then she got them changing up their, well, you know. At one point, all these packers were lined up on our kitchen table, and a few really realistic looking dildos as well. Then these guys started asking my advice about which ones looked better on them.”

  “Why you?”

  “Well, they figured since I was in med school. I mean, it was really important to them to get a naturalistic look. Don’t get me wrong. Ai Chang was really professional about everything.”

  “I’m sure she was.”

  “David, are you okay?”

  “I’m fine, alright? I’m just sorry Luke pulled this kind of stunt on you.”

  “Hey David, I didn’t mind. Really. I just said it was weird. Weird is not a bad thing. We all had a good time. Ai Chang’s boxers were really cool, colourful with all these funky prints. It’s like her personality suddenly comes out in her work. It was really amazing seeing her do what she really loves. Luke got coffee and donuts for everyone. The shoot lasted a few hours. Afterwards, Ai Chang took all of us out for lunch at Sneaky Dee’s.”

  “Good for you guys.”

  “David, there’s also something else you should know. Luke told me not to tell you.” I drew a breath. “But this is important.”

  “If you mean him coming to Italy,” David said, “he already told me.”

&nbs
p; “He did?”

  “Yah. He pretty much had to. He needed directions and the family’s itinerary and everything.”

  “Then everything’s settled?”

  “He’s on a plane over the Atlantic right now, isn’t he?”

  “And how,” I asked, “are you feeling about all of this?”

  “Well, he told me not to tell anyone. So now I’m the one with this secret. I’m not sure what to think of it. They’ve got me pretty busy here, helping out getting everything ready.”

  “Is everything okay?”

  “Besides me not speaking Italian, and everyone asking about my sister, and when am I going to get married? Yeah, sure everything’s fine.”

  “What do you tell them about your sister?”

  “I tell them what Ma tells them, that Luciana’s out west in Vancouver and couldn’t make it.”

  “So what are you going to do when Luke shows up?”

  “I don’t know, Daniel. I haven’t thought that far ahead, okay? All I know is this reunion is way bigger than I thought. There’s going to be close to a hundred relatives coming to this thing.”

  “What? Are you kidding?” I sat up straighter in bed. “Who are all these people?”

  “Mostly cousins. A lot of them. Nonno was the youngest of five kids, four of them boys. So the De Lucas are everywhere over here. They’re flying in from all over Europe and the States. I had no idea. My aunts are hosting a dozen of us, their neighbours are putting up a contingent at their villa, most are staying in Palermo and Torretta. They’ve got ninety acres here. The big gathering is this coming long weekend. It’s the Ferragosto, which is a popular vacation time. They’ve rented two party tents. Daniel, it’s going to be a three-ring-circus.”

  “Who’s in charge of all of this?”

  “My cousin Carina. Her ma, my aunt Bianca, is the family genealogist. But Carina’s the person who’s actually organizing everything.”

  “And where’s Luke going to stay?”

  “He says he’s going to check into a hostel in Palermo.”

  “David, do you ever wonder where he gets the money?”