by L A Cotton
He might have been speaking French for all I cared because I was stuck at the point where he said Ana was in love with me.
Ana loves me?
Deep down, I think I knew she did. Her eyes gave her away, filling with whatever emotion she was feeling at that moment. Grief, pain, healing...love. I had witnessed it all. But she never said the words, and part of me wondered if it was because she wasn't ready, or she just couldn't fully move on from losing her family.
Maybe if she had said the words, things would have changed. No, things would have been the same. I could only keep her safe by walking away. Or at least, that was what I thought. Now I wasn't so sure.
"You okay?" Paul's voice ripped me from my thoughts and the realization of everything sunk in.
I tipped my chin, too choked up to respond.
"I'll watch out for her. But you need to make a choice, man, once and for all. Them or Ana. Because that girl up there is falling. Fast. And I'm not sure anyone will be able to save her when she does."
He might as well have plunged the knife for a second time. That was what it felt like. I hadn't made things better for Ana by walking away...I had only made them worse.
~
I ran my palms over my jeans again. Uncle Marcus had demanded my presence. Just me. I knew it was about Braiden's little stunt. He had been out of town again, but news traveled fast in our circles.
I tried to dry my palms one last time before knocking on the solid wooden door.
"Come in."
Yeah, that was his pissed tone all right. I was in for it.
He didn't look up as he ordered, "Sit, Jackson."
Twenty years old and reduced to a trembling, sweaty mess. But the guy seated at the huge desk was Marcus Donohue. Somebody you not only respected...but somebody you also feared.
I shrank into the leather chair and waited. It was no use to try to make excuses because Marcus never appreciated excuses. Not back when we were learning the ropes of the family business, and certainly, not now.
Seconds ticked by and eventually, he dropped his pen and crossed one leg over the other as he regarded me. "So? What happened?"
I shifted, trying to organize my thoughts quickly. On the drive over to the Donohue estate, I had replayed my version of events, but Uncle Marcus could always smell a liar. So I knew I had to go with the truth.
"Braiden went after Calder. I knew he was planning something but didn't realize how serious it was until it was too late. I dropped my guard. Sorry."
"That's all you have to say?"
I nodded. He knew the details. When something went to shit, he made it his business to know. He was just testing me, to see if I would rat out Braiden. Like father, like son.
Uncle Marcus dragged a hand over his chin and exhaled. "Braiden might just have started a mess I can't fix. Not this time.” His eyes narrowed at me, pinning me to the chair. “Are you ready for that?"
I knew what his eyes were telling me. Something was coming...and Braiden had played our hand early.
"Things could get messy, Jackson. People are going to get hurt.”
People already got hurt, but I didn't say the words.
He tugged at the knot of his tie and muttered under his breath. “The next generation is out of control. You know, your father always had to keep me in check, and now you’re doing the same. History has a funny way of repeating itself." He smiled wistfully, lost in memories, but I didn’t miss the flash of another emotion in his eyes. It looked a lot like regret. But that made no sense. After all, what did he have to regret? Marcus loved his life.
Dad and Uncle Marcus were inseparable back then. Dad worshiped the ground he walked on. They might not have been blood related, but they were closer than any two brothers I knew. And although I didn’t know much about how Dad got involved with the Donohue family, I did know it had to do with Marcus bailing Dad out of a mess when they were young. They’d been friends ever since. The life might have killed him, but Dad wouldn’t have had it any other way. It was all he knew. All I knew. Until Ana.
Uncle Marcus straightened, slammed on his business face, and continued. "Try and stop my son from doing any more damage and stay alert. If Declan had any control left over that crazed nephew of his before, I doubt he has any now. Hell, he will want retribution for this. I'm putting Peter’s guys on Briony. You won't see them, but they'll be there. She hates being babysat, but it's necessary. I'll speak to Chief Randall too and have him increase campus patrols. You get wind of anything, and I mean anything, you come directly to me. Clear?"
I nodded again, my heart pounding in my chest. The shitstorm was coming...and it was headed straight for us.
~
Braiden gave nothing away after having his own meeting with Uncle Marcus; he just returned to the house as if nothing had happened. This was our relationship now. There was a time we had shared everything, and now we were like strangers. If anyone noticed, they hadn’t said anything. Except Dennis, who continually checked in with me. I got the impression he was worried about Braiden's latest stunt, too.
“What are you guys doing for the holiday weekend? Mom is insisting I drive home but fuck that. I might go pay Lexie a visit. It’s been too long since I saw my cowgirl.” Shaun took a long pull on his beer, before resuming his control of the figures running around on the flat screen.
“Dinner duties with Dad at the house. Some of the uncles are coming in from upstate,” Braiden called from his position at the table, counting out piles of bills.
They were? No one had mentioned anything to me. Family business was usually handled away from the house, and I doubted they were coming for leisure purposes.
“I might stay on campus. Apparently, they do something at the SC. Spending the weekend with Dad and his new play bunny, no thank you,” Kyler drawled.
My eyes whipped up to where he was sitting. His words triggered something. Ana. Ana had stayed on campus last year for Thanksgiving. Would she be staying again? Would she be safe? Fuck. I bet Cormack and Elena and the rest of her friends would all be going home. Maybe she would go, too. It would be safer. I would be able to play happy families without worrying about her every second of every hour.
“Pierce, you in?” Dennis held up the spare controller, but I declined. There was too much running through my mind for any downtime.
Glancing over at Braiden, I watched him in hushed conversation with Kyler. The dude was a serious kiss ass, and it was starting to piss me off. Ever since he followed boss’s orders to hold me back while Braiden's fist made nice with my face, I no longer had much patience for him. But he had all too easily stepped into my shoes as second. Not officially, but it was happening, right in front of my eyes. And even though he was welcome to it, it still pissed me off.
Braiden’s eyes flickered to mine and he tipped his chin to beckon me over. “Your cut.” He thrust a wad of bills into my hand and I took it. It was dirty money, of course. Revenue from his on-campus activities. I didn’t touch a penny. Ever. Instead, I saved it all as I waited for the day I could start my own life. Everything I had—clothes, the car, cell phone—was all from the trust fund Dad had left me. Which was all dirty money as well, but it was my only tie to him and he’d deposited it all in a legal account for me. But my monthly cut from Braiden’s activities was stashed away in a sports bag in a hidden compartment in the Donohue house.
“Business is gooood,” Kyler chimed, and I wanted nothing more than to knock the smile off his face.
The other guys soon gathered around, all too eager to take their cuts. Braiden might have been impulsive and hot-headed, but he was a good businessman. I guess he inherited that from Uncle Marcus. But he was less interested in the legal arms of the business and more interested in what made a quick buck, like drugs and pushing stolen property.
“Payday, motherfuckers. Let’s go to Dante’s. Drinks are on me.” Travis slung his arm around Kyler’s shoulder and the two of them cheered.
Braiden surprised me when he stood and said, �
��Let’s go. I need a drink.”
“And some pussy,” Kyler added, laughing, his eyes wild.
"No one gets trashed and everyone comes home. We have early practice tomorrow and Coach is already riding me hard. I don't need to give him any more ammunition."
Braiden locked up the rest of the money in the safe and rejoined us. The guys were already hyped up, ready to blow off some steam, but all I could think was, so much for laying low.
Chapter 15
~ANA~
"Come with us? Mami would love to meet you. And I promise we can keep our hands off each other for most of the time. Please, come. I don't want you holed up here all alone. On Thanksgiving again. Please," Elena whined, dropping her bottom lip for effect.
"Elena, we've been over this. I've agreed to help Sarah out over the weekend so that only leaves Thanksgiving, and I can go to the student center if I get lonely. Which I won't." Liar. "It’s only four days. I'll see you Monday."
Elena huffed some unintelligible Spanish at me and threw her arms wide, wrapping me in a hug. "In case I don't get one after the game. Text me, call me, hell, send carrier mail. Just don't sit here all weekend moping."
I pulled back and smiled. "I do not mope."
"You kind of do."
"Paul offered to stay. He's becoming a little overbearing ever since we crossed into the friend zone."
"I bet Marielle would love that."
"He said she suggested it. What have they been dating, like two weeks?" I frowned. For as much as I was relieved that Paul was dating, Marielle had taken it upon herself to try to befriend us all. She was a little intense.
"Strange one, that one. But if she makes Paul happy then we have to suck it up and smile."
I glanced at the clock on the wall behind Elena. "Better start now then because we're meeting them in five minutes."
Elena groaned. "Dios mio. Let’s go."
~
The atmosphere in Lowe Stadium was electric. I missed who Paul said we were playing but whoever they were had brought a large crowd, and their sea of white and navy jerseys stood out against our white, black, and green.
Even if Thirty Seconds to Mars hadn't have blasted out across the PA system, the roar of the crowd would have alerted me to the team's arrival on the field. People cheered and whooped, stomping their feet and singing along to the opening bars of the music. It was something else, and despite my eyes searching him out, I was swept up in the buzz.
"So, Ana, how do you like football?" Marielle shouted over the noise, and I shrugged holding my fingers to my ears to indicate it was too loud to hear her. She pursed her lips and nodded but relaxed when Paul pulled her into him, tucking her petite frame into his side.
I didn't feel anything. Not even a tiny sliver of jealousy. Not that I wanted to be jealous, but considering how close Paul and I had gotten recently, I thought I might have felt something. If anything, I was just relieved and happy for him. He seemed genuinely into Marielle and they were undeniably cute together, in a goofy kind of way.
My eyes tracked the team until they landed on him. Tense posture, squared jaw. Jackson always looked ready to pounce; worlds apart from the gentle and loving guy I had gotten to know the year before. But he did have two sides, like polar opposites. Serious and playful. Uptight and laidback. Controlling and understanding. He was like two different people sometimes, but then living with the Donohues for most of his life couldn't have been easy.
I watched the game with my heart in my mouth. Every time Jackson ran straight into a player, I winced, feeling every bang and crash right along with him. But this time felt different to the other times I had watched, from the time I had a total meltdown on Paul. Something in me was changing. My love for Jackson remained the same, but I was tired. Tired of the lies and the secrets, tired of never knowing what side of Jackson I was going to encounter. Maybe it was Elena’s words playing on my mind. She made it sound like I never knew the real Jackson, and maybe I didn’t. Maybe it was all an illusion. Maybe Jackson was never going to choose me over them. Maybe there was never a choice in the first place.
Shaking the thoughts out of my head, I let my eyes find him again. Jackson Pierce had stolen my heart, but Paul was right. I was stronger than that. I had survived worse.
“Ana, isn’t this great?” Marielle nudged my shoulder, a huge grin smeared on her face. “I didn’t realize how much fun it would be.”
I nodded, returning her smile. She was right; it was fun. The noise, the nail-chewing tension, it was infectious. And for the next hour, I would enjoy the atmosphere and push thoughts of the guy wearing the number thirteen to the back of my mind.
Thirty minutes later, the score was tied at seventeen. The Fallen were in control of the ball, and my eyes watched in awe as one of our players flung the ball toward Braiden, who was tracking the ball’s projection. He caught the ball with perfect precision, clutching it to his body as he turned and started to sprint down the field toward the end zone.
At first, I thought people were screaming with delight at the prospect of Braiden scoring a touchdown. But the sound became more frantic and people sounded scared, not excited. I followed where everyone seemed to be looking but couldn’t see anything to cause concern. And then I heard it.
Three rounds of gunfire sounded out and chaos erupted all around me. Some people dropped to the ground, shielding themselves with their arms. Others started to run for the exits. I stood rooted to the spot. The distant sound of Elena’s and Paul’s voices unable to penetrate the bubble surrounding me. My eyes followed Braiden as he ran for Jackson. The rest of the guys joined them and their eyes darted around the stadium.
Another shot sounded and they all hit the ground.
Moments passed and the frenzy around me continued. I was vaguely aware of it but couldn’t move. And then Jackson turned his head in the direction of my row. He was staring directly at me, only I was so far away I was sure he couldn’t see me. Not really. But still, I stood there. A statue, unable to move.
“Ana, ANA. What the hell is wrong with you,” Elena shrieked, and then an arm wrapped around my waist yanking me to the side. “Come on, girl. We have to get out of here. This shit is crazy.”
My body moved along with the arm pulling me, but my eyes remained transfixed on Jackson. He was running off the field with Braiden and the rest of the team, and a couple of officers passed them, their hands wrapped around their weapons.
“Ana. Move it.”
“Just pick her up or something. I think she’s in shock.”
My feet lifted off the ground and my face met Tyson’s jacket as he hoisted me over his shoulder. Something in me snapped, and I yelled, “Put me down. I’m fine. I’m fine.”
Tyson lowered me to the ground, and I took in the crazy unfolding around us. People were rushing out of the exit, spilling onto the sidewalks leading back to campus. Girls were crying, holding on to one another with tears streaming down their faces. But the sound of sirens drowned out their sobs and the night sky filled with flashing red and blue.
“We need to get out of here. Let’s head back to the house.” Tyson sounded so calm, and Elena followed his lead, as he started to maneuver us through the crowd. I was wedged between them and Paul and Marielle, who were behind me. She was sobbing while Paul reassured her.
Eventually, we reached the house. The door was open; Jamie and Nate stood in the doorway with strained expressions.
“Campus is being locked down. Jay just got the call.”
The call?
“I want to go back to McGinley.” The words rushed out of me, surprising me. I didn’t really want to be alone, but I had said them all the same.
Paul whispered something to Marielle and she nodded. “We’ll walk you back now. I’ll stay with Marielle tonight.” He looked at the guys.
Elena protested, but Tyson ushered her into the house, and Paul took my hand, still holding onto Marielle. “Come on. We should hurry.”
And we did. Minutes later, we arrived
at McGinley. Girls were huddled in the common room, replaying the events of earlier. I thanked Paul and Marielle and told them to go ahead to Adkins Hall.
“Be safe, Ana.” Marielle hugged me, before stepping back into Paul’s embrace, and they left.
Once inside my room, I checked all of the windows and pulled the blinds. At some point, my hands started shaking, making it difficult to undress. Eventually, I managed to pull on a tank and slouchy pants and climbed into bed. When my phone vibrated next to me, I almost jumped out of my skin.
Elena: That was crazy. Apparently, no one was hurt. Cass and Lydia are here now. Police are everywhere. Are you sure that you’re okay on your own? What was that, chica? You scared me back there! Xx
I typed out a quick reply, telling her that I was fine and would speak to her in the morning. And then I closed my eyes.
~
“I have to keep you safe. That will always be the most important thing to me. I love you, Ana. I. Love. You.”
My eyes flickered opened, heavy from the dream I didn’t want to awaken from. But something had breached my subconscious state. A noise.
Tap. Tap. Tap.
My phone vibrated on the last knock, sending me into a panic.
It’s me. Open the window.
J x
A million thoughts flooded my mind, unsteadying me, and I flopped back onto the bed. The game. The gunfire. Jackson crouched on the ground. Dreaming of Jackson declaring his love for me. Jackson standing outside my window a year ago.
He knocked again and I hauled myself up, running a hand through my bed hair. I avoided looking at him as I pulled up the blind and unlocked the latch before retreating to my bed.
Jackson climbed through the gap, and when his eyes found mine, a painful ache zipped through my heart.
“Thank God you’re okay. I’ve been going out of my mind, but Coach ordered us straight back to the locker rooms, then the police wanted statements, and Principal Kellar came by. Then Uncle Marcus arrived and-”
