A Mended Man (The Men of Halfway House Book 4)

by Jaime Reese

  "Sometimes?"

  Aidan's lip twitched. "And stubborn."

  "Very stubborn," Jessie added with a grin.

  "Then you know me well enough to know that I suck at letting things go, but you also know I don't give up. I might not always know what to say or how to say it, but I swear I'm trying. And I need you to know, regardless of some of the stupid shit I say…or don't say, I always want you in my life. With me."

  Jessie placed his hand over Aidan's. "And I need you to know that I love that difficult, stubborn son of a bitch and I'm not going anywhere. Even when he tries to push me away."

  Aidan crushed his mouth against Jessie's and grabbed him by the ass and the back of his head to pull him flush against his body. Jessie fisted his hands in Aidan's hair, holding on for dear life as Aidan ravished his mouth, unmistakably conveying the words he had—and hadn't—spoken with each swipe of his tongue and pull of his lips.

  They finally separated from the kiss, gasping each breath between them, still gripping on to each other.

  "I love you, Aidan. Every second of every day." He rested his head against Aidan's shoulder and placed his hand against Aidan's chest, closing his eyes when the strong, steady, fast beat pulsed against his palm. With every breath and heartbeat.

  Aidan kissed the top of his head and buried his nose in Jessie's dark hair. "And I promise I'll do everything I can so you never regret that."

  Jessie closed his eyes and took a deep, calming breath, fighting off the exhaustion numbing his senses. Too much had gone on in too short a period of time. He needed a little break to recharge and find his happy place. After two weeks of intense case prep work and research review with a client, he wanted to shut out the world and veg out on the couch with Aidan. Since their relationship breakthrough almost two weeks before, they hadn't had a full weekend together. And he missed their private time.

  He crossed and uncrossed his legs, casually scanning the solid colored walls of the interrogation room, purposely plain, boring, and non-distracting. Detective Reyes had contacted him mid-afternoon, requesting he come by the precinct. No additional details or information. He had thankfully switched off his phone while at the courthouse, wrapping up the final summary points of his findings to a panel of a half dozen lawyers. He certainly didn't need to let his mind wander regarding the reason for the detective's call.

  He looked to his left at the one-way mirror, his reflection sharp and clear, but a calming peace settled within knowing Aidan stood on the other side of the glass. He didn't need to see him to know he watched over him; he could feel his presence as if he stood directly behind him.

  Detective Reyes entered the room then closed the door behind him. "Thanks for coming in. I'm sorry it took me a few minutes to get in here." He pulled out the chair across from Jessie and sat, placing a folder on the table between them. He looked different from his prior appearances, wearing tactical gear rather than the usual three-piece suit he'd worn during their prior conversations. "Camera's on while I'm in here for documentation in your case."

  Jessie's heartbeat picked up its pace. "Have you found him?"

  "I'm going to need you to look at some pictures." Reyes reached into the folder and removed several stacks of clipped images. "We found a few men who established a pattern that fit with the information you provided on Michael Johnson. But we need you to look at the photos to see if he's one of these men."

  "Okay," Jessie said in the steadiest tone he could fake. A mix of excitement and fear squeezed his chest. Finally, after all this time, maybe the nightmare would end.

  Reyes took the first stack and removed the clip, turning them toward Jessie, revealing a series of photos. "Each stack is a different person. I have twenty men I want you to see in this file. I have a few pics of each person because the footage is old, so I wanted to make sure you had at least one image as a clear reference. The angles are odd in some instances, videos are grainy at certain times of the day, and some are with different types of attire. Hopefully one of the images will jog your memory and help you identify him."

  "I don't need anything to jog my memory," Jessie absently said, taking the first stack of photos for the first man. He glanced up at the detective, noticing the sudden discomfort. "Sorry, that was…rude."

  "No, it wasn't." Reyes's lips thinned and his brows knit together. "I imagine you wouldn't forget his face."

  Jessie shook his head. "This isn't him. This man isn't tall enough. Michael's shoulders are broader." He re-clipped the stack of photos for the first man and reached for the next, discarding the second man just as quickly.

  "Take your time. We're in no rush."

  Jessie rejected the third man and his stack of images, then the fourth. He took the fifth stack, unclipped the photographs, reviewed the first image then flipped to the second photo of the same man.

  "Does he look familiar?" Reyes asked, almost sounding surprised.

  After reviewing the second, clearer, photo, Jessie eliminated the fifth man and re-clipped his stack of photos. "No. I wasn't comfortable eliminating him based on the first photo because he had a similar build, but the baseball cap obstructed his face. Michael had one of those same hats with that team logo. The second photo was clearer." They continued to review the stacks, Jessie easily discarding each and adding a brief comment regarding the reason for his elimination. Hope began to dim as he neared the end of the pile of suspects. "I'm sorry. I know this must have taken a long time to gather."

  "Don't worry about it," Detective Reyes said, subtly shaking his head. "Worth it if we can catch him."

  Jessie nodded, moving another man to the discarded pile. "I really do appreciate it." He grabbed the next stack of images and automatically unclipped the stack of photos before glancing at them.

  The air froze in his lungs. He stared at the familiar face and profile of the monster he could easily identify from a distance. The slight bend in his nose, the way one eyebrow appeared thicker than the other, and the number of pockmarks in each cheek. Every detail engraved in his mind surfaced. A vivid, full color image of the monster who haunted him rose in his mind in place of the grainy, poor quality surveillance image in front of him. He reached out, hoping to hide the tremble in his hand, and flipped over the first image to see the second photograph. He needed to be sure. The wrath of Calloway and every member of the team would fall upon whatever man he identified. He had to be one-hundred-percent certain.

  The pounding of his heart muted all other sounds. He took a few deep breaths, unable to rip his eyes away from the man in the image, staring directly at him—the monster who haunted him far more than he admitted to anyone. He absently flipped the second photo to look at the third image. Michael. He couldn't stop himself from reviewing each photograph. An odd and somewhat morbid compulsion, like driving by an accident and not being able to rip your eyes away from the damage. He collected the half dozen images and stacked them neatly, needing to busy himself, hoping to disguise the uncontrollable shaking of his hands. He didn't bother attempting to clip the stack of photos together, working the binder clip would require far too much coordination than his hands could muster at that moment. He turned the stack to face the detective.

  Detective Reyes straightened in the chair. "Is that him?" he asked, his tone hopeful.

  Jessie nodded and clasped his hands in his lap. "Yes."

  Please leave.

  Reyes shoved the stacks of photos back in the folder and shot up from his chair. "Now we've officially got a face to go with the evidence we have. We'll catch him."

  Jessie nodded and forced a smile.

  Please leave.

  Reyes's direct stare unsettled him. Oddly penetrating, as if he could inspect each of Jessie's thoughts. Behind the cool, polished demeanor, Jessie suspected this detective could easily dish out his own flavor of vengeance. "If you need a minute, that's fine."

  Jessie nodded again.

  Please leave.

  "Thanks for going through these. I know it wasn't easy." Reyes wal
ked over to the door and hesitated.

  Jessie sat still, waiting to hear the click of the door when he exited. Please leave. He stared at the plain wall, willing the detective to exit the room. His lips parted on a breath when the door opened then clicked shut behind him. He took a few deep breaths, hoping to appear unaffected long enough for Aidan to leave the observation room.

  Without a doubt, those hazel eyes watched him carefully, waiting for the tiniest of details to ensure he had survived the photo lineup unscathed.

  He hadn't.

  * * * *

  Aidan stood, arms crossed, staring at Jessie through the glass. Reyes had briefed him on the team's findings before requesting Jessie arrive at the station. The tension thrumming through his body had him ready to snap.

  "C'mon. What are you waiting for? Reyes sent out the text. We need to go," Sunny said.

  "Not yet. Not until I know he's okay."

  Sunny looked at Jessie, sitting still at the table. "He's fine."

  No, he's not. Something nagged at Aidan to stay a little longer. Jessie always put up a good front, but he couldn't be as steady as he tried to appear. The way he had meticulously stacked the photos, ensuring the corners lined up perfectly—his nervous tell. In Jessie's world, high stress situations required extra caution and things needed to be excessively perfect, as if the storm within wouldn't erupt if everything else managed to remain in order.

  Jessie didn't know he had set the ball in motion as soon as he had identified the man in the photograph. Manny had already run an age progression for each suspect and took it a step further, tapping the team's agency contacts to access their facial recognition technology and databases. Having an in with the other agencies definitely had its perks. They now had a name, a face, and a last known address. But without Jessie's official identification, their hands were tied.

  Stupid fucking protocol and procedures.

  If Jessie knew, Aidan suspected there would be no way he could keep it together.

  "You go ahead. It's two hours away. I'll catch up." Aidan spoke to Sunny, but his focus never shifted from the man sitting at the table, in the exact same position. Aidan remained still, observing every detail of Jessie's stoic pose, resisting the urge to break through that door without some sign his presence would be welcomed. The worry ate away at him, but Jessie always needed to push through things on his own to assert his independence.

  So Aidan waited.

  "No way. You want this more than Reyes." She looked back over to Jessie. "What are you waiting for?"

  "Not sure. I'll know when I see it."

  Every bone in Aidan's body commanded he storm in there and do something—anything—to ease the obvious tension in Jessie's rigid body.

  Jessie sat, unmoving, except for his bobbing Adam's apple and the slight rise and fall of his chest with each breath. His shoulders didn't move and his posture didn't waver. His gaze steady, focused straight ahead at the bare wall. He unclasped his hands, reached up to flatten the perfectly combed hair at his temple, then casually returned to his stoic pose.

  But Jessie couldn't hide the tremble in his hands.

  Shit. Aidan's heart violently pounded as he raced out of the observation room, leaving Sunny behind. He threw open the door to the interrogation room, spotting Jessie still sitting in the same pose. He closed the door behind him and took a step forward.

  "Jess?"

  Jessie lowered his head. "Aidan," he said on a whisper. "I need…you to go."

  "No." He took another step closer to Jessie. "I'm not leaving you alone like this."

  Jessie turned his head to the side, granting Aidan a slight view of his profile. "Please."

  Please leave or please help? He walked over to the chair across from Jessie and sat. He rested his clasped hands on the table and waited.

  "Detective Reyes said there was a camera in the room."

  "Which he switched off as soon as he walked out."

  "The…glass."

  "Sunny…if she's still there. Otherwise, I'm positive she's blocking anyone from going in there until she knows we've walked out of this room."

  "I need you to go," Jessie said, his voice barely above a whisper. "Please."

  "I'm not leaving you."

  Jessie slowly tilted his head upward.

  Aidan would have dropped to his knees at the pain staring back at him had he not been sitting. Fear clouded the crystal blue eyes he loved so much, haunted like the first time they'd met so long ago.

  "I'm not stupid," Jessie said. "You've told me enough about the team to guess Reyes already knew which photo I was going to pick, and I'm assuming he took liberties to find where Michael is now using that same photo and contacts the team has established. And I'm going to guess he probably had a judge on speed dial he called as soon as he walked out that door to grant him a warrant to whatever location he found for Michael." Jessie paused and swallowed heavily, staring at Aidan's vest. "And that's why he and you are in your tactical gear. You needed me to confirm it was him from the photo lineup. And now you need to go."

  "I'm not leaving you."

  Jessie shook his head. "I…can't do this. I need to know he's caught. So you need to go."

  Aidan's phone chirped with a new message. He pressed the button to ignore the text. Between his pounding heart and the adrenaline coursing through his veins, Aidan couldn't focus on anything other than the pain screaming from every pore of Jessie's body. "You need me to be there. To make sure he's caught?"

  Jessie lowered his head and nodded. "I can't…please…I…need this nightmare to end."

  Aidan fisted his hands under the table, digging his blunt nails into his palms, hoping the sting would distract him from the anger that began to boil at Jessie's desperation.

  "He tried to break me." Jessie quieted and crossed his arms tightly. "I…see that now. I…I can feel it." He looked up at Aidan, a single tear trickled down his cheek with the movement. "I think…he did," he whispered. He turned away, avoiding eye contact. He lowered his head again, his shoulders slightly shuddering.

  "Jess…look at me."

  Jessie shook his head. "I don't want you to see me like this."

  The anger at the monster who did this to his Jess, the ache in his chest from the pain slowly tearing down the positivity always radiating from Jessie's spirit, the frustration at not having closed this case out months ago…all swirled inside in a tornado of vengeance, rage, and helplessness.

  "If you want me to leave because you want me to be there to make sure he's caught, then I'll go once I think you're okay enough to be on your own. But if you think, for a fucking moment, I'm going to walk out this door because you don't want me to see how this monster hurt you, then you seriously don't know me after all this time."

  Jessie lifted his head, his focus now squarely on Aidan. His eyes, a pool of unshed tears held back by a dam of control even Aidan wasn't sure he had. "Is this what you want to see? You want to see me broken like this!"

  Aidan leaned forward and pointed a finger at Jessie. "You are the one who told me to not let those monsters win, to not give those monsters or memories power. Was all that bullshit?"

  Jessie gasped. "No."

  "Then don't you fucking dare think for a second that son of a bitch broke you. He didn't. You escaped from him and you made yourself into the man you are today. A man…" Aidan snapped his jaw shut, his nostrils flaring with each deep, forced breath. "A man who taught me what it's like to be strong. What it's like to push through shit and get out of that dark hole. So don't you crawl into that abyss, because I will fucking hunt you down and bring you back kicking and screaming."

  Jessie took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, slumping his shoulders as if a mere breath took the full force of his strength.

  "Now give me an inspirational poster line so I don't completely lose my shit in this room and pitch a fit."

  A soft, pained chuckle escaped Jessie. "My mind…is strong and has the power to define me."

  "And what's your min
d telling you now?"

  Jessie straightened his shoulders and took a deep breath, then another. He looked up at Aidan, this time, with a spark of determination in his eyes. "He didn't break me."

  "You're damn right he didn't." Aidan didn't bother to hide the smile. He glanced at his phone when it chirped again with a new message.

  "I know you need to go. And I need you to be there. Please."

  Aidan cleared the message. The team was on their way, and Sunny waited for him outside the door. "I don't want to leave you alone. Would you be fine with me calling Julian?"

  Jessie nodded.

  Jessie needed someone quiet who offered support right now… quiet support, so that immediately eliminated Cole from the short list. Aidan grabbed his phone and quickly dialed Julian's number. After a short conversation, they disconnected the call. Luckily, Julian and Matt were running errands while the guys staying at Halfway House took advantage of their weekend pass starting that Friday evening. "Matt and Julian are a few minutes away. They're coming right over."

  "Thank you." Jessie rubbed his arms. "Aidan?"

  "Yeah?"

  "I'm…not as strong as you think I am."

  "No, you're not. You're stronger. Don't let that son of a bitch get inside your head."

  Jessie quietly laughed. "He can't. Not when you keep kicking him out."

  Aidan smiled. "Damn right."

  "Every second, Aidan." Jessie took a deep breath and stared at Aidan, his eyes still shone with fear, but it battled heavily with the sheer determination of the man who wore those dark suits that always made Aidan weak in the knees. "I swear, every second of every day."

  A warmth washed over Aidan with the slow rebuilding of Jessie's strength staring back at him. Jess would pull through this as he always did.

  "How do you do that? How do you manage to make me feel as if I can get through anything?"

  Aidan leaned forward over the table, thankful the ray of hope and positivity slowly seemed to return to his Jess. "It's you, Jess. That's all you. You're the one who's taught me anything is possible."