The Wrong Kind of Love

by Lexi Ryan

  “Good,” the nurse says, smiling. “I think someone wants to talk to you.” She points behind me.

  “Dr. Jackson, may I speak with you privately for a moment?”

  I slide the chart I was looking at back into the nurse’s station and turn to Dr. Weir. She nods to an empty patient room, then steps into it without waiting for my response. Fuck. My shit day is about to get shittier.

  The nurse who’s sitting at the computer by me bites her lip and averts her eyes. That’s a small community hospital for you. Dr. Weir and I were sleeping together six months ago, and now the whole staff titters when we so much as speak to each other. They’re going to love it if we go in that room together.

  Not only do I not want to speak with Kyrstie alone about anything other than our patients, I also don’t want to fire up the hospital rumor mill about what is or isn’t between us. Especially not while I’m getting closer to Nic. Who might be leaving. Who might have a job offer waiting for her.

  I follow Kyrstie into the room. She’ll just make a scene if I decline.

  She closes the door behind me, folds her arms, and leans against it, narrowing in on me with those cold blue eyes. “I heard your new nanny didn’t waste much time working her way into your bed.”

  Anger rushes through my blood. “Jesus, Kyrstie. You just cut right to the gossip, don’t you?”

  Her lips twist into a smirk. “I’m not gossiping. I’m looking out for a friend.”

  She isn’t looking out for me. She’s looking for an angle. We used to be friends, but we started sleeping together as two lonely adults who both had reasons why we didn’t want romantic relationships—or at least I thought we were on the same page, until she tried to remove my wife’s belongings from my house without my permission. I ended it that day, and she still hasn’t forgiven me. “My relationship with Nic is none of your business.”

  “Hmm.” She twirls a lock of hair around her finger. “It’s your family’s business, though. She sure found her place with them quickly. I wouldn’t imagine just any nanny would be welcome for holidays at the cabin. Unless she’s sucking your dick, that is.”

  I glare at her. She was so pissed that she wasn’t invited to Memorial Day weekend at the family cabin. That should have been my first hint that she was looking for more than she said she was. “Back off, Kyrstie. My family’s affairs have nothing to do with you.”

  “Well, maybe I’m wrong about her. I just saw something I thought you might want to know.”

  My gut pitches. Last time Kyrstie “saw something,” I found out my wife was cheating on me with my best friend. Hell, maybe even then she was just trying to carve out a place in my life.

  Don’t think about that shit.

  “It’s your call,” she says. “I’ll walk out of this room right now if you want me to.”

  I don’t want to ask, but knowing she has information about Nic will make me crazy if I don’t get it now. Kyrstie’s manipulative and cold, but she’s not a liar. “What?”

  She doesn’t try to hold back her smile. She fucking beams at me. “Turns out little Miss Veronica Maddox has an appointment with my office next week.”

  I frown. “What the fuck do I care where she gets her yearly pap?”

  Kyrstie wags a finger at me. “Not a pap visit. A prenatal visit.”

  I grunt. “That’s ridiculous.”

  She arches a brow. “Is it? Don’t you think it’s convenient that she”—she makes air quotes—“‘didn’t know’ who you were and fucked you the night before she moved in with you?”

  We didn’t sleep together that night, but I know everyone who was at the bar thinks we did. We were locked in the bathroom together, went home together. But we didn’t sleep together until a week ago. Even if that first time had resulted in a pregnancy, it would be too soon for her to know. But that doesn’t mean she couldn’t have been pregnant when she came to town.

  “I like the way you look at me. You make me feel sexy and wanted.”

  “Who made you feel like you weren’t?”

  “A mistake.”

  Was her fiancé a mistake because he got her sister pregnant? Or was he a mistake because she was pregnant too?

  She was drinking that night though—drinking a lot. Sure, there are some young women who don’t care enough to abstain when they’re expecting, but Nic is far too conscientious for that.

  “See?” Kyrstie says. “She’s not who you think. Are you ready to play daddy to another man’s baby?”

  Other than a few sips of wine on her birthday, Nic hasn’t had a drink since the night we met. Could it be she didn’t know she was pregnant when she came to town? Maybe she recently found out and that’s why she’s so determined to leave in February—because she doesn’t want me to feel trapped. “When did she make the appointment?”

  Kyrstie rolls her eyes. “You think I’m answering phones now? Who cares? She’s pregnant and she’s already made her way into your bed and your house. Somebody’s looking for a baby daddy, and she’s got her eye on you.”

  God. It makes sense. And I’m fucking relieved, because I can handle this, and now that I know her secret, I can tell her and she can stay. She doesn’t have to move across the country to take a new job.

  It would be just like Nic to keep this from me just so I wouldn’t feel obligated to care for her child.

  “I have secrets, Ethan. There are reasons I can’t stay.”

  “There are things you don’t know about me. Things that might change the way you feel.”

  I cover my mouth, but Kyrstie must see my smile, because she gasps. “No. Please tell me you’re not falling for this and thinking the baby’s yours.”

  I shake my head. “It’s not mine. But it doesn’t matter.” I’m grinning outright now. “When you love someone, it doesn’t matter.”

  I look at my watch. I’m late to meet Lilly, Teagan, and Nic at the ice festival. My Nic. Pregnant Nic. I can’t wait to see her. I can’t wait to tell her she doesn’t need to leave, and that a baby doesn’t change anything.

  Ethan

  I’m late, and the ice festival is packed. I only left the hospital a few minutes later than I expected, but parking was a nightmare, and by the time I found a spot three blocks away, I had a text from Nic asking if I was going to be able to make it. I’m grateful that she understands the reality of my job, but I hate that she thought I might bail on her—tonight or after I found out about the baby.

  I can’t wait to tell her I know. I can’t wait to prove she can count on me to stand by her. But first, I want her to experience a Jackson Harbor tradition—the ice festival. I grew up seeing ice sculptures every winter, so I probably take them for granted. I’m already smiling as I imagine watching Lilly and Nic take in the different pieces of art.

  I see Nic across the square. Her hair’s down her back in the big curls she puts it in sometimes, and she’s standing in front of an ice sculpture of Olaf from Frozen. I don’t see Teagan or Lilly, so they must be somewhere else together.

  Nic’s turned away from me, and I slide my arms around her from behind and nuzzle her neck.

  She stiffens, and I immediately drop my arms and step back. “Shit. I’m sorry. I thought you were—”

  The woman turns to me, her brow wrinkled in confusion, her lips twisted in a tense smile. Her shoulders drop when she meets my eyes. “Ethan Jackson?”

  I can only blink at her. She looks exactly like Nic, but she’s not. I know she’s not. She felt wrong in my arms. She smelled different. And even though her face looks just like Nic’s, there’s something about her that’s just . . . not Nic.

  She offers a hand. “It’s so good to meet you! I recognize you from your picture. I’m Nic’s twin sister.”

  My breath leaves me in a rush. Of course. She said she had an identical twin sister—the one who’s pregnant with the ex’s baby. I guess I wasn’t prepared for how identical . . . or how different, oddly. I take her hand. “Ethan Jackson.” I shake my head. “Sorry about that. F
rom back there, I thought you were Nic.”

  She laughs. “It happens all the time. And I mean all the time. Mom can’t even tell us apart. Gosh, it’s great to finally meet you. I’m just so sorry about what happened, but I appreciate you working with Nic.”

  What happened? Is she talking about the wedding? Why is she apologizing to me for stealing Nic’s fiancé? Fuck, if anything, I should thank her. “I’m sorry. What do you mean?”

  Her cheeks flush a brighter pink. Just like Nic’s do when she’s embarrassed. But the pink in this woman’s cheeks isn’t nearly as pretty. “I didn’t mean to leave you in the lurch. I’m just glad Nic could fill in while your mom took her trip.”

  She’s not making sense, but given her history with Nic, I’m not interested in sitting down for a heart-to-heart anyway, so I don’t question her nonsense. “Yeah, it’s been great having Nic. She’s . . .” Over the woman’s shoulder, I spot Nic in line at the Ooh La La! concession stand with Lilly at her side. She’s bundled up properly for once, a hat covering her head and a scarf wrapped around her neck. Lilly reaches up to take her hand, and they smile at each other.

  My heart squeezes, but I force my attention back to the sister. “I’m sorry. Remind me of your name again?”

  She shakes her head in amusement. “I’m Veronica.”

  “You’re not Veronica.” Is this woman crazy? She already stole Nic’s fiancé but is she trying to steal Nic’s identity now, too?

  “I’m Veronica Maddox, Nicole’s sister. The one who was originally supposed to be your nanny?”

  “When we were in seventh grade, she hated her teacher and wanted to switch places at school. I agreed to do it because she’d been in trouble so many times I was afraid they’d send her away if she kept it up.”

  “You could really pull that off?”

  “We’re identical. No one ever suspected.”

  She tilts her head to the side. “Ethan? Are you okay?”

  Nicole

  “Three peppermint hot chocolates.” The barista hands our cups over the counter.

  “Come to me, you sugary goodness,” Teagan says, taking them from her hands while I pay. She gives Lilly hers, and Lilly squeals happily and takes her first sip. I dump my change in the tip jar and snag my drink from Teagan before she can get any ideas and double-fist it.

  I take a sip, and Teagan says, “I thought that was for Ethan.”

  “He’s running late, and he won’t mind sharing with me.”

  “You two are ridiculously cute.” She lowers her voice. “You need to tell him.”

  I nod. After I talked to Teagan this morning, I decided she was right. No good will come of keeping this secret longer than necessary. I just want to talk to Kathleen and let her know why I have to come forward. “I haven’t been able to reach Kathleen, and I feel like she should know before I do it.”

  “But you’re going to.” My friend looks worried. “Soon?”

  I nod. “I’m in love with him, Teag. And I can’t do anything about it until he knows the truth.” I just have to tell it without telling the truth about Kathleen’s trip and why I agreed to lie in the first place. Unfortunately, with only half of the story, my lie doesn’t seem noble in any way.

  We weave our way through the crowd, and I spot Ethan near the Olaf sculpture, his hands in his pockets.

  Lilly spots him too and rushes forward. “Daddy!” She wraps one arm around him and holds on tight to her hot chocolate with her other hand. “Nic bought me peppermint hot chocolate. She told me a story about the peppermint fairy and the ice goblin she taught to be nice and then they became friends!”

  “Did she?” He turns, and his face is etched with anger. About the hot chocolate? No, he wouldn’t be upset about that. But he is angry about something. His jaw is hard, and he nods a greeting to Teagan then locks his cold eyes on mine. “Nic seems to be full of stories. This afternoon, I even believed she was pregnant.”

  “What?” I shake my head. Is that why he’s angry? Did he think I was hiding a pregnancy from him? “No, Ethan. I’m not pregnant.”

  “I know. Your sister is the one who’s pregnant.” He drops to his haunches to kiss Lilly’s forehead.

  That’s when I see Veronica.

  “Hi, Nic,” she says, her eyes bouncing between me and Ethan. “Surprise!”

  Ethan stands and points his thumb at Veronica. “I just met your sister, Veronica.” His eyes glitter with anger as he says her name. “She was thanking me for letting her sister Nicole fill in for her when she couldn’t be here.”

  “Oh, fuck,” Teagan whispers beside me.

  I swallow hard and step toward him. “Can we talk in private?”

  His nostrils flare. “Your sister and I already talked. I don’t think I have anything left to say.” He takes his daughter’s hand. “Lilly, baby, we have to leave. Say goodbye to Nic.”

  I can only stare at Veronica. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this. I was supposed to tell him myself.

  “Why don’t you catch up with your sister?” Ethan says. “Do whatever you need to do. You can pick up your stuff after Lilly goes to bed.”

  “What?” Lilly looks up at me with wide eyes. “Why are you picking up your stuff, Nic?”

  “It’s okay, baby.”

  Ethan closes his eyes, pain sweeping across his face for a beat before he looks at his daughter again. “She’s not leaving forever, baby. She just isn’t going to sleep at our house anymore.”

  I look at Ethan and shake my head. “Talk to me.”

  “I can’t,” he says, but this time his voice is so low that I can barely hear him. “I don’t know who you are.”

  “You do.” My vision goes blurry, and I realize I’ve grabbed his hand. I’m desperate for him to listen. I feel like if he walks away, I’m going to unravel completely.

  Lilly drops her cup and wraps herself around one of my legs. “You promise you won’t leave, Nic?”

  “You’ll see Nic tomorrow,” Ethan promises, his angry eyes on me. Do you see what you’ve done? Do you understand what this is going to do to her?

  “We’re drawing a crowd,” Teagan says softly behind me.

  “You lied about who you are,” Ethan says. “How am I supposed to believe anything else you tell me?” He shakes his head, but when his gaze drops to Lilly, the anger falls away. He looks back at me, and my heart skips as I realize his anger was replaced with sadness. “Damn you, Nic.”

  Nicole

  “What the hell just happened?” Veronica frowns and watches Ethan walk away. “He came up to me and hugged me when he thought I was you. He hugged me, Nic. That isn’t a typical employer-employee thing to do.”

  “They’re in love, you idiot,” Teagan says.

  Veronica shakes her head. “Not again, Nicky. Come on, you were going to start a life for yourself in February, remember? You applied for all those jobs.”

  “I fell in love with him,” I say helplessly.

  “You always fall in love. You throw away everything for the guy and then he screws you over.” Her eyes fill with tears. “You said I could come with you. You said you were going to start anew somewhere.”

  “It’s real this time,” Teagan says. “Different.”

  “If it’s so different, can you explain why he thought you were me?”

  “She had to pretend to be you to keep the job,” Teagan says.

  I stare at my sister. My twin. My only family and my own personal saboteur. “I was going to tell him the truth, but he needed to hear it from me. And now . . .” Now he’s walked away. Now he’s been betrayed. Now I’ve lost him.

  “You should have told her you were coming,” Teagan says to Veronica.

  “What, so I could play along and pretend to be Nicole?” She shakes her head, and she doesn’t look apologetic or regretful. She looks angry. “You weren’t going to tell him. You’re too afraid to be alone to really be yourself. And I should have known you’d be too afraid to really go after your dreams.”

 
Teagan’s chest puffs out and she steps forward. I hold my arm out. “Don’t. I’ve got this.”

  “She’s the fucking evil twin,” Teagan mutters.

  “Why are you even here?” I ask Veronica. “Shouldn’t you be in Alabama, living my life?”

  “Look who’s talking,” Veronica says.

  “I’m here because of you. Because you slept with my fiancé and got pregnant with his baby.”

  “You’re welcome.” Veronica throws up her hands. “I’ve been living with Marcus for a month, and I can tell you without a doubt in my mind that ruining your wedding is the best thing I’ve ever done for you. He’s bossy and controlling. He thinks he can tell me where to go and who to talk to. He wouldn’t even let me talk to my own fucking sister.” Her voice cracks and a tear slides down her cheek. “I walked away. I came here because I didn’t have anywhere else to go. You told me I could come with you, but you’re doing it again. Throwing your life and plans away for a guy. Again.”

  Teagan shakes her head. “You’re a real trip, girl.”

  “I can’t talk to you right now,” I tell Veronica. I wrap my arms around myself and walk away. “I need to figure out how to clean up the mess you just made of my life.”

  “My life,” she shouts after me.

  Ethan

  “Nana! You’re home!” Lilly rushes into the living room. There’s a single light on by the recliner where my mom is sitting with her feet up.

  I’m still registering the shock of Nic’s twin, so I’m not as quick as my daughter to register the surprise of Mom’s presence.

  I follow Lilly into the living room. “What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be—” I stop speaking when I see her. She has a knit cap on her head, and her face is haggard. “Mom? Are you okay?”

  Lilly climbs into her lap and puts a hand on either side of her nana’s face. “Nana’s sick, Daddy.”

  My mom nods. “It’s true, sweetie. Nana is sick, but I’m getting better. I’m determined.”