Jaded Dusk

by Scott Wale

  “Someone just say something, please”, Fenrit cut in with frustration from all the indirectness.

  “I used to have a tail and the fact that I no longer do is to Nevit’s immense amusement”, Tradok explained.

  “No, the amusing part is that you kept it”, Nevit clarified. “I thought you were joking with me the whole time until I finally got to see it in your workshop’s sleeping quarters a few days ago.”

  “That only adds to the number of questions that are forming in my head”, Fenrit said.

  “Out with them all”, Tradok commanded. “Let’s discuss this matter so we can close it for good.”

  “You know that’s not a possibility”, Nevit said with a snicker.

  “Why do you no longer have a tail?” Alejade started off the questioning.

  “Let me answer that and the natural follow up question of why I’d keep it”, Tradok began. “Most Sauronoids follow the belief system of Srkepri. Part of that system is a ritual where a Sauronoid that is entering adulthood removes their tail. Much like your beliefs about the life essence, Srkepri includes the belief that the life cycle centers around the river of which the Trados River is a holy site. All Sauronoids are born from the river and at death they are to return to the river. This obviously isn’t true anymore as many Sauronoids moved away from their wild heritage just as most other evolved beings did. This precludes them from actually being born in or near the river. Nonetheless, the sacrament of cutting off one’s tail and delivering it back to the river is an old tradition that practitioners of Srkepri still maintain. The return of the body to the river at death is also of importance, but when the river and downstream point of Lake Sier began to fill up with dead Sauronoid bodies that weren’t decomposing fast enough, Sauronoids were encouraged to cremate instead. My mind was awakened just an instant too late as I decided to reject my belief system moments after cutting off my tail. I purposely didn’t return it to the river and decided instead to keep it as a reminder of never blindly following something just because that’s what the masses do.”

  “Very interesting ritual”, Alejade commented. “And yes, I too see the similarities between Srkepri and the life essence.”

  “I assume I’m allowed to ask questions too?” Nevit asked.

  “If you must, although I’m doing this more to hear Alejade’s perspective”, Tradok agreed in an exasperated tone.

  “Are Sauronoids that still possess their tail not followers of Srkepri?” Nevit asked.

  “Not necessarily”, Tradok answered. “Sometimes a tail grows back, although it is very rare for it come back full size. Once in a great while it will come back even larger than the initial tail. I believe most tail severing rituals these days are followed by a cauterization, which helps prevent infections, but also prohibits the possibility of the tail regenerating. I’m also amazed you managed to ask a serious question.”

  “It was difficult, but part of me cares”, Nevit said while his eyes turned from black to blue.

  “How did you get away with being able to keep your tail?” Fenrit asked. “I imagine you’re not cutting it off yourself, yet somehow you kept possession when you were expected to let it go in the river.”

  “A priest performs the ritual”, Tradok answered. “Once your tail is severed, you are left alone with it as you perform a chant that accompanies returning the tail back to the river. There is no system to check that the tail actually was deposited into the river. I left my Sauronoid family shortly after the ritual. I suppose the guilt of not wanting to believe what they did played a large part in me leaving.”

  “Have you abandoned the whole belief system or are there parts you still feel are applicable?” Alejade asked.

  “Part of me still feels the need to be cremated and returned to the river upon my death”, Tradok responded. “I have no one to carry that request through for me though, so I don’t dwell on it too much.”

  “You don’t trust me?” Nevit said as his eyes turned black.

  “You’ve given me so much grief over my tail, I didn’t think I could make it through a serious conversation with you about my final rites”, Tradok said.

  “Are the final rites the only thing you still feel a connection with?” Alejade further inquired.

  “Yes”, Tradok began candidly. “There was a time when I practiced all the rituals of Srkepri, but even before my enlightenment prior to shedding the tail, I was beginning to have my doubts. I still believe in some form that we come from and eventually return to that which makes up Faunar. Maybe not necessarily the river that Srkepri centers on, but something that gives us all a common base.”

  “It sounds like you still contemplate your core beliefs”, Alejade pointed out.

  “My beliefs can be summed up by the fact that I’m open to the possibility I’m wrong”, Tradok responded. “I like to think the probability of me being wrong is minimal and I like to call that positivity faith. There are many belief systems out there beyond yours and that which I formally held. I don’t think I was meant to follow Srkepri my entire life or even that of any other belief system currently in existence. It’s always been difficult for me to explain, but most being’s minds work extrinsically while mine has naturally always worked intrinsically. I don’t need the comfort of knowing or thinking about a higher power, but I’m curious about exploring the possibility that everything on Faunar is connected in some way. I suppose you could argue those are one in the same, but I don’t see it that way. I think there’s a possibility we’re all connected, but it isn’t necessarily all part of a divine plan. It’s just the way things developed over time from a common root if you will. If a supreme being did exist, it seems to me they’d have better things to do than meddle in the affairs of their creations.”

  “That is an interesting point of view that is very similar to one considered by some believers of the Maker”, Alejade said. “Some philosophers have contemplated the idea that the Maker has had no interaction with its creations since inception. They attribute the life essence to the Maker and that’s all we have as a connection to the Maker.”

  “That gives some validity to my point”, Tradok began. “The concept of the Maker sprung from somewhere and already it has diverged into at least two theories that you’ve made me aware. If we trace it all back, does it come to a single point?”

  Tradok lead the group forward while letting his question sink into the thoughts of his followers. The trail began to bend around another mountainside which once again obstructed the view of where the trail went beyond the bend just ahead. The group rounded the corner which opened up into a valley and allowed an overlook of where the trail headed for a considerable distance.

  “Oh, no”, Tradok said while stopping dead in his tracks and surveying the course of the trail.

  “What is it?” Fenrit asked.

  “Look at the trail ahead on the far mountainside”, Tradok answered pointing at the side of a heavily sloped mountain. “The trail has been eroded, and there doesn’t appear to be a place to safely traverse the stretch and get back to where the trail picks up again.”

  “Denegrass, we don’t have time for this”, Fenrit released his frustration. “What are our options?”

  “We can attempt to cross the eroded spot, but I wouldn’t suggest it with our limited gear”, Tradok began. “It’ll cost us even more time, so I suggest we head back to where the trail split by the cave and take the route through the cave and into Prominence.”

  “I thought you said that route was difficult”, Nevit said.

  “It’s safer than this mess”, Tradok answered. “This is even more dangerous when you consider the trail was probably taken out by a rockslide. That means a lot of the rock that is making up the spot where the trail used to sit is probably loose.”

  “Let’s give this some thought before making any rash decisions that could cost us a lot of time”, Alejade suggested shooting Fenrit a glance as if to say she had it under control. “What are the challenges presented from each rou
te?”

  “Like I said, the route ahead no longer has a trail, and what does remain would make for a precarious crossing at best”, Tradok stated. “Backtracking and using the route through the caves has the risk of getting lost in the network of caves and a difficult climb between the cave exit and Prominence.”

  “Define difficult climbing”, Fenrit said still perturbed by the situation.

  “It’s more upwards which can be very exhausting”, Tradok explained. “It could be done safely, but we’d have to be very slow and careful considering we don’t have the appropriate gear.”

  “How difficult is the cave network to navigate?” Alejade asked.

  “Since there are four of us plus Jandra, if she’s willing to enter the cave, we can snake through to help keep the direction of where we’re going and where we just came from”, Tradok advised. “It’s very easy to get disoriented and lost in the cave network, but if we do it right then we can get through despite my spotty memory of the cave system.”

  “Do both trails lead up to the same point?” Alejade asked.

  “No”, Tradok answered. “The route through the network of caves was less secured when I was living in Prominence. We’d want to be cautious as we approach from either way, but I would anticipate less of a struggle to come out through the caves. It’s actually the route I took to escape and was the only time I’ve traveled it.”

  “So you’ll be attempting to remember everything in reverse?” Alejade confirmed.

  “Yes, but I have a vivid memory of the last and first part of the trail”, Tradok said. “Or I guess it’ll be the first and last part of the trail.”

  “It sounds like backtracking to the caves is our best bet”, Alejade recommended. “It now looks to be the safest route and should save us some time when we actually reach Prominence.”

  “I agree”, Tradok added looking to Fenrit for his approval.

  “We don’t know where those cymutts are headed, which means we need to get to Prominence as fast as possible”, Fenrit rehashed the situation. “Are you sure the caves are our fastest route?”

  “Given the condition of the trail ahead, both routes would probably take the same amount of time”, Tradok estimated. “Just as Alejade said, we may end up saving time being able to get access into Prominence a little faster.”

  “Can we push through the caves tonight since daylight isn’t a factor either way?” Fenrit asked.

  “We won’t do ourselves any favors by being exhausted once we reach Prominence”, Tradok reasoned. “I realize we’re now up against a marching cymutt party, but if we don’t play this carefully we won’t be stopping anything. The lighting device is keeping me warm enough, but a night’s restoration gives me a better chance at avoiding a complete freeze up.”

  “You’re right”, Fenrit said realizing that his frustration had allowed illogical thoughts to infiltrate his head.

  “So, back to the caves?” Tradok pushed for confirmation.

  “Yes, let’s move”, Fenrit agreed.

  “Good, because I don’t know how you planned to get through that mess ahead”, Nevit commented.

  “Let’s turn around and start heading back before it gets too dark”, Tradok directed. “We can stay the night in the cave and get moving again at daylight, not that it’ll help with where we’re headed.”

  “Wonderful”, Nevit commented. “We get to go back through the scree.

  XXI.

  The group used its last bit of energy to march around the final turn that led to the second fork they had faced during the day’s journey. Traversing the stretch of scree a second time was exhausting work that wore out the legs of even a well-conditioned premalier. Sleep was on everyone’s mind and Fenrit was thankful that his supply of blonde berries and a few remaining nuts made foraging a needless activity for the evening. Even Jandra had landed on a nearby boulder to take a break from a tiring flight that had challenged her muscular wings with the constantly shifting wind directions.

  Dusk was now upon the group and the cave called for them to take shelter inside. Tradok led the group into the mouth of the cave that was a small chamber where light reached every corner due to the wide mouthed entrance of the cave. The initial chamber would not be suitable for camping as it offered little protection from the outside elements and the only real advantage was the light from outside, which would soon be lost to the night sky.

  Tradok trudged forward to the second chamber that was connected to the first with a tall, wide passageway that showed plenty of signs of being heavily traveled. The second chamber only pulled through a thin ray of light from the first chamber. Curious what the entire chamber contained, Tradok grabbed the lighting device and inserted a packet. When the light filled the small room the group was greeted by several columns of varying thickness. Prior travelers had made their mark on the columns using a multitude of mediums to create their graffiti. Tradok recalled having heard how fragile rock formations were and how simply touching the formations could disrupt progress that had been made over several years. Tradok had never considered himself a conservationist, however, he did find the graffiti a little disturbing and eerie, so he led the group on to the third chamber hoping to find more space for a camp site as well.

  The passage between the second and third chamber was considerably narrower than the passage between the first and second chamber. The temperature was also noticeably cooler and the cave floor had shifted from a mix of sand and rock to exclusively hard rock. The third chamber was considerably larger than the first two and felt spacious compared to the previous chamber that was cluttered with columns. A scattering of stalactites clung to the ceiling and a small number of stalagmites sprung up through the cave floor, but they were few and far between. One of the corners of the chamber contained a sand, rock mixture on the floor that would be more comfortable to lay on than the hard rock that covered the floor of the rest of the chamber. It was in this spot that Tradok decided to drop the gear and proclaim a camp for the night. Tradok immediately setup his torrid sleeper which, if nothing else, provided a light source in a chamber that would otherwise be cloaked in darkness.

  Jandra clenched her talons around Alejade’s arm where she had perched herself upon entering the cave. Raptors were designed to fly in the wide open sky, which made the tight quarters of a cave more than just unnerving. Sensing Jandra’s apprehension, Alejade began to stroke the raptor’s feathers immediately soothing away some of Jandra’s tension.

  Tradok fought against his tired and increasingly colder state from a full day of hiking and wandered farther into the cave network with Nevit who also wasn’t ready to settle down for the night. Tradok had hoped seeing a little more of the cave network’s entrance would refresh his memory. The first and last part of the cave network could be clearly pictured in the Sauronoid’s head, but unfortunately everything in between was all a blur. He desperately craved recapturing his memory and gaining some confidence about tomorrow’s route. There wasn’t time to do any major exploring, but maybe the sight of a few more chambers would put the necessary pieces of the puzzle back into place. Snaking around the cave network was always an option, but it would be time consuming. Seeing the cymutts and realizing time was now a factor had taken a noticeable toll on Fenrit, which meant finding their way through the cave network was not an option.

  The pair had just entered their sixth chamber when they heard water dripping nearby. Tradok and Nevit began to look around to determine whether it was a slight drip or the trickle of a stream. Tradok had recalled following a stream for part of his journey all those years ago. If he could locate a stream here, it would be a satisfactory starting point for tomorrow.

  The chamber was large enough that the light from the device couldn’t penetrate every corner of the cavern. Tradok methodically followed the chamber’s perimeter trying to determine if the water source was in this chamber or an adjacent one. When he had finished checking the entire perimeter he cut across the middle of the chamber trying to track the
water source by sound. Several paces into the middle, the lighting device illuminated a large object hanging from the ceiling. Tradok and Nevit were startled by the appearance of such a large object that they were unable to identify as living or inanimate. A leathery material had sheathed whatever was inside and the fact that the object failed to move led Tradok and Nevit to believe it was some sort of bag hung from the ceiling rather than a living creature. The pair carried forward to the next chamber after conducting the best examination they could of the object from their position on the cave floor.

  The next chamber was comparatively smaller than the previous one; however, Tradok and Nevit were able to trace the sound of flowing water to the far wall. A stream ran along the cave wall and flowed out the only other opening of the chamber aside from the one that Tradok and Nevit had entered through. This meant the group would have to wade through water. Tradok leaned over the edge of the stream and shined the lighting device down the passageway. The light revealed that the next chamber wasn’t too much farther down the passageway and from Tradok’s vantage point the following chamber opened up so that one could travel without having to wade through the stream. Tradok and Nevit were satisfied with the plan for tomorrow’s start and agreed to head back to the camp site.

  The Sauronoid and Mortoptera were cutting back across the sixth chamber when they made a startling discovery. The leathery object that had clung to the cave ceiling was now gone. They hadn’t remembered hearing any noises, which one would have thought would be apparent given the echoing sounds they had heard from a faintly flowing stream. They also considered the time they had spent in the chamber that held the stream, which was a short duration. It didn’t feel like enough time for another being to enter the chamber, remove the object and haul it off. Perhaps the object was living after all, but if that was the case what was it and where had it gone? Tradok and Nevit’s curiosity only took them as far as once again pacing the perimeter of the chamber and illuminating every conceivable spot with the lighting device. After no further revelations the pair continued on their path back to the camp site.