Angels of the Second Earth Age

by Mike Montgomery

  Twenty minutes went by.

  “Here it is.”

  “How far did you have to go to get that camel?” Shannon asked, impatiently.

  The old man pointed a short distance across the yard.

  “There something wrong with this camel,” Shannon said. “It has a flat tire, or are there buttons to push to make it come up?”

  “Only one hump,” said Slow slowly.

  “How am I supposed to stay on a one-humped camel?”

  “You’re supposed to hold on to the rope that’s around the camel’s neck. Here, I will help you on.” Shannon measured the path of the sun while the old man spoke.

  Slow got down on his knees. Shannon put his foot on his back and pulled himself up with the rope.

  “See? It’s not bad.”

  “Not bad? I can’t stay on this thing.”

  A small boy playing with a stick hit Shannon’s camel. The camel grunted and took off running. Shannon hit the ground. He got up and brushed himself off.

  “Does the seventy-five-dollar camel have two humps?” Shannon asked.

  “Yes, it does,” said Slow.

  “I’ll take it. I need the other things on this list, and I need a guide.”

  Slow looked at the list for a while. “It will be about fifteen minutes.”

  Shannon waited for over an hour.

  Slow returned with bad news. “All the guides are drunk. You will have to wait till tomorrow.”

  “Can no one else help me?”

  “Yes, actually, there is someone else, and he works cheap. I’ll be back in a minute.”

  Thirty minutes went by.

  “Here is your guide. His name is Boy.”

  “Boy! There’s no one else?”

  “No. Is anything wrong?”

  “No,” Shannon sighed.

  “Hey! I thought we were friends,” said Boy.

  “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

  “You’re the one that’s going to get hurt.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “That camel bites.”

  “It’ll be all right. Ouch! The freaking camel just bit me!”

  “I told you.”

  “Just give me the hundred-dollar camel,” he said to Slow.

  “Okay. Are you riding together?”

  “No, I’ll get him a camel. Bring the little one.”

  “You’re kidding me!” cried Boy.

  “Slow said that it has a lot of heart.”

  “It’s tiny! Can’t I have a different camel?”

  “I can get you the one that bites.”

  “No, thanks. I’ll take the small one.”

  Shannon paid Slow and looked at Boy. “Slow’s name says a lot about him.”

  “If you give him an extra dollar, he will run. Watch.” Boy pulled out a crisp dollar bill. “Hey, Slow, if you hurry up, I have a tip for you.”

  Slow packed everything in a frenzy. Shannon almost thought time was running backwards.

  “All loaded up,” he said, so quickly his words ran together.

  Boy and Shannon were on their way. They didn’t talk for a long time, until Shannon broke the silence.

  “Boy, you look good on that camel.”

  “I’ll trade you.”

  “No, thanks buddy, but you can ride on the pack mule.”

  “No, thanks.”

  “Where are we going?”

  “To the Bad Lands.”

  “Why do they call them Bad Lands?”

  “Because bad things happen there.”

  “Really, Boy?”

  “Really.”

  They traveled for hours. Finally, they came upon a large pile of rocks with letters carved on them.

  “Do you know how to read the letters?” Shannon asked Boy.

  “Yes, I do.”

  Shannon waited and waited. “Well. What do they say?”

  “Stay out.”

  Shannon was unfazed. “I have to do number two,” he said, jumping off his camel and heading toward the brush to take a shit.

  “Watch out,” Boy said. “The lizards around here are poisonous.”

  “Ha, ha, you’re funny. I’m not scared of lizards.”

  Shannon went behind some big rocks and a tall cactus. He looked around and pulled his pants down. He bent down and felt a sharp pain.

  “Aaahhh! I got bit! I got bit!” Shannon watched a lizard run out from behind a cactus.

  “What bit you?” asked Boy.

  “I think a lizard. I’m not going to die, am I?”

  “What kind of lizard was it?”

  “It was a red one.”

  “Yep, you’re going to die. It’s poisonous.”

  “You have to suck the poison out, Boy.”

  “Where did you get bit?”

  “On my ass.”

  “For sure, you’re going to die.”

  “Please, Boy, don’t let me die. I’ll do anything. I’ll be your bitch.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “I saw you hug Bubba Dee.”

  “Let me see your bite. Oh, my god, it’s horrible. It’s so bad. Quit crying, you big baby.”

  Shannon was in tears.

  “You’ll do anything, right?” asked Boy.

  “Yes! Anything!”

  “Remember that.” Boy bent down and pulled a needle out of Shannon’s ass. “It’s just a cactus needle,” he laughed.

  “Oh, my God, I owe you thanks. Anyone who would suck poison from another man’s ass is all right in my book. I don’t care that you’re gay.”

  “I’m glad you’re going to live. It was just a cactus needle. But you’re still my bitch, and I’m gonna enjoy that tight ass. C’mon, bitch, let’s get moving.”

  “You’re kidding, right, Boy?”

  “Hmm. Maybe.”

  An hour passed.

  “Are you sure you know where we’re going, Boy?”

  “Like the back of my hand. Just call me Mr. Map.”

  An hour later, Shannon saw the same pile of carved rocks. “Is that the same pile of rocks we passed before?”

  “No, there are piles of rocks like that everywhere.”

  Another hour passed.

  “Hey, Boy. I’m getting hungry. We should stop in the shade and get a quick bite to eat.”

  “All right, we’ll stop.”

  “Uh, Boy, where’s the umbrella? I can’t find it.”

  “It must have fallen off while we were riding.”

  They ate then rode for another hour. The same pile of rocks appeared again, and there was their umbrella.

  “Hey, um, Mr. Map, I found our umbrella.”

  “Where?”

  “Right beside the pile of rocks that we passed three times.”

  CHAPTER 8

  Ground Of The Gods

  “Damn, I’m good,” said Boy.

  “Why is that?” asked Shannon.

  “Weren’t we looking for the umbrella? I found it.”

  “You’re lost. Instead of making just right turns, take some left turns for a change.”

  They went left. This time, they wound up at the entrance to a large cavern.

  “What is this place?” asked Shannon.

  “The Caverns of the Ancient Gods. Men have gone in, but they never came back out,” Boy replied.

  “Really?”

  “No, I’m kidding. I don’t know where we are, but it sounded good.”

  “I guess we’re going around, because I’m not going in there,” said Shannon.

  They found a long, narrow path that led to the top of the mountain.

  “Wait. Stop, Boy,” Shannon said, jumping off his camel. He studied a dark spot on the ground.

 
“What is it?” asked Boy.

  “It is a sign of a volcano or a sign that someone burnt something here for a long time.”

  “You got to be kidding me.”

  “Is this where we are supposed be, Boy?”

  “Um, yep. This is where we were supposed to end up. Right here.”

  “It looks like a good place to set up camp.”

  “There’s only one tent,” said Boy as he unpacked the mule.

  “So where are you going to sleep?”

  “With you, and when you fall asleep, I’m going stick it in real deep, bitch.”

  “You’re kidding right? Right?”

  Boy stood there silent looking at Shannon.

  I didn’t feel like sleeping, anyways.”

  “Didn’t I save your life? Just think about that.”

  “But it was just a needle.”

  “It doesn’t matter. I was going to do it for you.”

  “Let’s get some fire wood,” said Shannon. He was getting good at changing the subject.

  “Okay, let’s just stay together in case someone gets bit,” said Boy.

  “You’re not gonna let me live this down, are you?”

  “Nope.”

  They searched for wood and kindling. Boy bent over and caught Shannon looking.

  “Are you staring at my ass?”

  “No,” insisted Shannon.

  “Do you think I’m pretty? I mean handsome?”

  “I don’t look at you that way. I like girls.”

  “Did you get all of the hair out of your teeth, or was it warm milk you wanted?”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “Number Ten.”

  “How did you know? I mean, what are you talking about?”

  “Never mind. I’m heading back to camp.”

  “Wait up, I’m coming, too.”

  Back at camp, they started a fire and ate dinner.

  “I’m going to wash off. Do you want to watch?” Boy teased.

  “I’m going back out to find more wood,” Shannon said.

  Shannon had barely started his search when he tripped over the biggest seashell he had ever seen. There was a horn on it. He held it to his ear, but instead of the sea, he heard a young man’s voice.

  “This is nuts. How did they get a voice in there?” he wondered.

  He went back to camp, walked around the tent, and ran right into Boy, who was changing.

  Boy turned, surprised.

  “Uh, you’re not a boy, Boy!” Shannon stuttered. Boy was a girl.

  Boy slapped his face, and then she ran into the tent in tears.

  “I found a seashell and wanted to show it to you. It talks,” Shannon said, trying to pretend what just happened hadn’t happened.

  “The shell is a message to God, and you’re not supposed to touch it,” Boy yelled from inside the tent. She was still crying.

  “Why are you trying to be a boy?”

  Boy came out, threw down her towel, and put her clothes on. Shannon turned his head.

  “Do I look that bad?” asked Boy

  Shannon didn’t know what to say. Boy sat down on a rock and began to cry again. Shannon sat down beside her.

  “Being a girl isn’t bad,” said Shannon.

  “Over here, it is. It is when you have a kid that you can’t feed. I got married last year, when I turned sixteen. My husband was an international spy. On our way to our honeymoon, we were kidnapped. My husband was tortured. He begged them to let me go. They didn’t. I was beaten and raped, and they cut my breasts off in front of him. They set him on fire and made me watch. They poured oil on me, but the fire would not light. They kicked me and left us for dead, but I wasn’t. I began to pray. A sheepherder returned me to my father. He saved my life. My father tried to pay him, but he turned away, and when he turned back, he was gone. I asked if I could be a boy so I could go back and kill them all when I got older. That’s why they call me Boy.”

  “Is Bubba Dee your dad?”

  “Yes.’’

  “What is your real name?”

  “It’s Ava, but that name is dead now.”

  “Well it’s getting late, Boy. I’ll put some wood on the fire, and you finish drying off.”

  A howl split the night air.

  “What the hell is that?” asked Shannon nervously.

  “It’s just a jackal,” said Boy.

  “What the hell is a jackal?”

  “It is a large dog that protects the grounds of the gods. Did you bring a gun, Shannon?”

  “No, I didn’t. Did you?”

  “Yeah, I always carry one in my bra.”

  “Okay, then we’re good. Wait a second. You don’t wear a bra.”

  “Duh, I’m kidding. Don’t be scared. Jackals are just wild dogs. Keep the fire high, and they won’t come close.”

  They climbed into the tent, exhausted. Shannon turned to tell Boy good night, but she began to scream then she was gone. Shannon got out of the tent quickly. He saw a large dog was dragging Boy from the tent. Shannon picked up the shell and ran after Boy. He yelled at the dog, and it dropped Boy and looked at Shannon.

  “Oh, shit,” Shannon muttered.

  The jackal jumped at Shannon and impaled itself on the seashell. It whimpered and died on top of Shannon, who couldn’t move.

  “Help!” Shannon yelled.

  Boy came over and pulled the jackal off. “Get up, Shannon. Jackals run in packs.”

  “That’s a jackal?” Shannon said. “I thought it was a freaking werewolf.”

  “Only you would think that, dumbass.”

  A low rumble alerted the adventurers to trouble, and sure enough, when they turned around, a pack of five jackals had gathered. They didn’t look very friendly. Shannon pulled the shell out of the jackal and faced the pack. He and Boy began to back up, but Boy tripped over Shannon’s backpack. She picked it up, but then they were trapped against the rocks.

  “We’re going to die,” Shannon conceded.

  “Look at it this way, Shannon. We are gonna be eaten by gods.”

  “I’m allergic to being eaten. I break out in blood stains.”

  Boy leaned into the rocks. Her hand slid down, and she felt a narrow passage.

  “I feel an opening behind me. It feels big enough for both of us.”

  “What are you waiting for? Let’s go,” said Shannon.

  Boy and Shannon slipped through the narrow opening. Boy went first. Shannon followed while the jackals barked and snapped at him. He fended them off with the shell.

  Boy said, “I have bad news and good news.”

  “Give me the good news first,” said Shannon.

  “If we get eaten alive, we might turn into gods.”

  “That’s good news.”

  “That’s all I can think about.”

  “What’s the bad news?”

  “This is a dead end. It leads to a hole in the ground, and I don’t know what’s down there.”

  “Yeah, but I know what’s up here. Move!” Shannon yelled, and then he jumped.

  “I hope it’s better than what’s up here. Here I come.” Boy jumped, too.

  She landed on Shannon.

  “That was an easy landing,” said Boy.

  “Get your ass out of my face.”

  “Do you see any needles?”

  “How can I see anything? It’s too dark down here. You’re not going to let me live that down, are you, Boy? I just saved your life, and you’re still harking back to me sitting on a needle.”

  “You’re right.” Boy spit in her hand and held it out. “Truce!”

  “What did you just do?”

  “I spit in my hand so we could seal the deal.”

  “Do we have to?”

 
“Yes, we have to shake.”

  “Okay, but next time, we just shake hands.”

  “We can bring blood next time.”

  “On second thought, spit is fine,” Shannon replied. “Let’s make a torch and find a way out of here.”

  CHAPTER 9

  Book Of Glass

  Boy and Shannon searched the darkness. They needed a torch. They needed light. They needed a way out.

  “Hey, will this stick do?” asked Boy.

  “Any stick will do,” Shannon replied.

  “Well, here’s a little limp one.” She handed it to Shannon. It wiggled in his hand.

  “That’s not a stick, it’s a snake!”

  Boy laughed.

  “Did you do that on purpose?” Shannon asked, growing tired of Boy’s antics.

  “Nah. Well, I could have. It was just a little one, and it wasn’t even poisonous.”

  “What if it bit me?”

  “On your ass? You would have died this time because I have been there, and I’m not going back.”

  “Boy, did I ever tell you that you were a smart ass?”

  “No, but I’d rather be a smart ass than bit on the ass.”

  “Shut up and keep looking for a stick,” said Shannon.

  “What about the shell? We can use it as a torch.”

  Shannon took his shirt off and wrapped it around the shell. “Good idea, Boy.”

  “Yeah, but how do we light it?”

  “With the lighter that I lit the fire with,” said Shannon, shaking his head.

  “Hey, you are good for something after all, Shannon.”

  Shannon lit his shirt, and the room got bright.

  “Look, there’s your backpack,” Boy said.

  “How did it get down here?” Shannon wondered.

  “I tripped over it and picked it up.” Boy handed the pack to Shannon.

  “Wow,” said Shannon. “Look at all the hieroglyphics on the walls.”

  “I don’t know what hieroglyphics are, but look at all the drawings,” Boy said.

  Shannon and Boy studied the drawings.

  “Look, Shannon!” exclaimed Boy. “There are drawings of angels fighting dinosaurs and other beasts.”

  They came upon a gate with three different symbols on it.

  “What does it say, Boy?” asked Shannon.

  “This is written in Latin, but I think it basically says, ‘Cherub protects this place with a flaming sword. If you enter, and you aren’t God, you will die a terrible death.’”