***
Kali
Her father took her far from the camp, and part of her expected to die out in the muddy fields. Sunny days had turned to lightning crackling in the sky, and the grass was sodden with persistent rain. Heavy heat sent beads of sweat down her brow.
The stormy weather matched her heart.
Every heartbeat signified another step closer to marriage and unhappiness. Another step away from Andriy and the freedom he represented. The ceremony would only be witnessed by two people, Kali and her father. The earth wept along with her.
He prepared the ceremony in a cave and forced her to stand outside in the rain. He covered her eyes with a blindfold while she waited. She steeled herself for the sound of the bells to ward off evil spirits, but it didn’t come. She realised, too late, that he probably intended to invite them. She swallowed hard a couple of times and smelled liquid grass. Hot rain drenched her back, and she sensed the eyes of small animals watching her warily.
Worst of all, she saw the darkness in her blood. That thing which called to her, clung to her, and lured her in. She ignored it because she didn’t know what else to do. Her father’s ceremony, no doubt, called it down upon her, but she would be brave. She would stand tall and remain defiant to the last.
These were her last days of freedom, and she wouldn’t waste them cowering for mercy that did not exist. She would take her power, accept her responsibilities, and allow herself to mourn for mere days instead of years. She might not take on her destiny with happiness in her heart, but she would not allow it to kill her in her sleep. Andriy’s acceptance spurned her on.
She sensed her father’s presence again, although his steps were soundless. Cold hands drifted across her face, marking her with something cool. The rain would wash it away, but that didn’t deter him.
His hands on her shoulders, he pushed her to her knees, forcing a metal cup to her lips. Taking the cup, she sipped the contents, her stomach turning at the tang. She knew there was blood in the liquid, probably her father’s, and although unnecessary, she drained the cup without complaint. Anything to get the day over with.
For an hour, he stepped around her, chanting and moaning, until he finally removed the blindfold and led her into the cave. She could barely see for the smoke, but the dizziness came from the liquid she drank.
She collapsed to the ground, her cheek against dirt and stone, as she watched her father through bleary eyes. She saw impossible visions of horror, fanged creatures with yawning mouths silently screaming in her face, their rancid breath turning her stomach. Images of shadowy hands grabbed her feet to drag her into the nether. She felt the pricks of a snake’s bite and the sensation of a million spiders crawling over her skin, but when she recovered from her visions, nothing was there.
Her father spoke to nothing and to everything. He pleaded and begged and offered her soul to the darkness. She could do nothing to stop him, but it didn’t matter.
She wasn’t his to give.
She had always been a gift, given to him, temporary and fleeting. Not his in this life or the next. He never did understand that. He never comprehended what it was he was trading when he made his thoughtless deals with devils and demons.
Frustrated, he cried out, but she couldn’t understand the words. Blood dripped from his forearms, travelling down until it fell from his fingers to puddles on the floor. This would never be her life. Her eyes drifted closed, and she welcomed the darkness of her own making.
***
She awoke on a blanket, comfortable and warm. The cave was empty, apart from that. No fire, no smoke, no father.
She felt… fine. More than fine. Something new simmered under her skin. She couldn’t tell if it was her own determination or her imagination which had gained something from the ceremony. She left the cave to see her father outside, waiting quietly for her. There was no sign of madness in his eyes and no hints that his actions of the night before had taken hold.
“We return,” was all he said.
As they walked, she wondered if she could work up the courage to plead for her freedom, yet again. Before she spoke, though, he hushed her.
“Not now, Kali. I’m tired.”
And he did look tired. He had aged overnight. His entire appearance had a lifeless, listless look about it. He had lost some of himself at his false ceremony, of that, she was certain.
At the camp, her people looked upon her with different eyes, as though a novice was so much less than a proven chovihani. She hadn’t really proven herself and had only her father’s word to vouch for her.
Drina, her face paler than usual, drew her arms around her sister. “You survived,” she said with a grim smile.
“Are you well?” Worry gripped Kali, and a dreadful premonition filled her soul.
“Well enough. We’ll celebrate tonight, little sister. Your life is beginning.”
Something in those words chilled Kali. Her father pulled her away. “Smile,” he hissed in her ear as he led her to the man he wanted her to marry.
What an oaf he was, this man named Besnik who was supposed to father her children. A slovenly man looking for his second wife, Besnik’s heavy-lidded eyes and large, scarred hands repulsed her. Besnik gave her a long glance before calling over his mother, an old woman almost as abhorrent as he. Her wrinkled fingers squeezed Kali’s hips, and she nodded at her son.
“She’ll do,” Besnik told her father. He refused to look at Kali again, and she caught a vision of her future.
Pain.
Chapter Thirteen
Amelia
When I saw Nathan after the big meeting, I thought something had gone badly wrong. But everyone was okay, so no obvious fights had broken out.
“What’s with the grumpy face?”
“Don’t start.” He shook his head, staring into space. I sat on the swing next to him, shivering as the night air raised goose bumps on my skin.
“So what happened?”
He pushed back with his feet, let go, and swung. Higher and higher he went, until he took a flying jump and landed on his feet. “They killed our parents, Amelia.”
I hopped off my swing and stilled his, but I stayed quiet, knowing he needed to talk it out for himself.
“Ryan said he heard what happened to them. This Vin wolf decided Mum would make good breeding material and sent his pack after her. Dad fought for her and wouldn’t stop fighting. Dad wasn’t into violence at all, but he fought a whole gang of wolves for her. The pack held him down and made him watch them hurt her… and she died. So he went mental and killed three of them before they took him down.”
I swore, following him as he wandered along the grass, going nowhere in particular. “I’m so sorry.”
He stared at me as though I had gone crazy. “Why are you saying sorry? They were your parents, too.”
“Yeah, I know, but…” I bit my lip. “I don’t really remember them anymore. And I’m sorry for that, too.”
“Doesn’t matter. You were a kid. How could you?”
He sat on the grass, rubbing his face and looking absolutely miserable. “I have to fight the werewolves who killed our parents. I have to face them. And I have to let them live.”
“Why?” I asked, suddenly fierce.
“Because Mum and Dad would never want me to be like them. Perdita would never look at me the same again. But Jeremy and Opa want me to do whatever it takes. They want me to channel the pain and use it to hurt our enemies. And those werewolves would deserve to suffer, Amelia, for what they did. But I can’t… I can’t kill someone.”
“It’s a war,” I said resolutely. “They would be casualties of war. But I don’t think you would be happy if you did commit murder. Revenge isn’t the answer.”
“Isn’t it?”
“Look at Opa. All he wants is revenge. Do you think it will make him any happier to get it? Do you really think he’ll celebrate when he finally gets his way? He won’t. He’ll be even more miserable because all he’ll have left are mem
ories and the fact Mémère’s gone for good. That’s the real reason he’s changed. He’ll do absolutely anything to avoid thinking about her.”
“Dad fought for Mum, though. Killed for her.”
“You fought for Perdita. She fought for you. You’ll fight to protect the family. That’s good enough, Nathan.”
I knew he would put how he was feeling in a box until everything had gotten back to normal. That wasn’t good for him, but that was how he dealt with things. I hoped he kept his focus in the heat of battle.
***
Connor hadn’t called or texted me by the following afternoon. I agonised over whether to call him first. I didn’t want to come across as overly eager, but I didn’t want him to think I wasn’t interested either. I wasn’t totally sure if I was interested or not, but I needed something normal. The news about my parents had shaken Byron, Nathan and me. I didn’t know how I was supposed to feel. In a way, I was relieved that strangers had caused my mother’s death, and that she’d not died at the hands of my father. The idea that the other pack had gotten away with the murders, for so long, crept under my skin and stayed there.
So Connor would have been a good distraction if he had called. The compromise was for me to call Ger, instead.
“Oh, hey, Amelia,” she said, sounding surprised when she answered.
“Hey. Boring day, so I thought I’d drag you down with me.”
She laughed. “Well, thanks for that. Oh, my… Will you lot ever shut up? I’m on the phone! Sorry about that. Ignorant pigs today.”
“Who?” I hoped I didn’t sound too interested.
“Oh, the usual misfits. Julie, Martin, Connor…”
She named a couple more people, but I had heard enough. He hadn’t bothered to text or show up because he was busy with Julie.
“Oh, right, cool,” I said hurriedly. “I’ll let you go. Someone’s calling me.”
I barely let her say goodbye before hanging up the phone. I wanted to die of mortification. I was so stupid. I had myself twisted up in knots trying to find what Kali and Andriy had, when they didn’t have anything at all. Neither did I.
I tried to tell myself I was only a little embarrassed, which I was. But more than that, I was hurt. I felt completely rejected, even if I didn’t like Connor as much as I could have. No big spark existed between us, and I could never see myself looking at him the way Perdita looked at Nathan. To be with someone normal, though, and forget about everything else for a few minutes, had been nice.
Later, Nathan and Perdita asked me to go to the zoo with them, so I didn’t hesitate. Anything was better than sitting at home waiting for Connor to call.
As soon as we caught a bus into town, I knew I’d made a mistake. Not only were Nathan and Perdita sappier than usual, I felt like crap, again. The headaches were more frequent, and I felt as though my entire body was being pulled down by weights. My joints hurt. The sun hurt. Noise hurt. Everything bloody hurt.
We walked through the park to get to the zoo, and passed screaming, over-excited kids, and gangs of flirting teenagers. I wanted to puke, for real. The zoo was hot and crowded, and I couldn’t pay attention to Nathan and Perdita because my head hurt so much. Glories of glories, my phone rang, and I knew without hesitation that it was Connor.
“I’ll only be a minute,” I said, a little embarrassed by the knowing look on Perdita’s face. My whole mood buoyed at the idea of talking to Connor, and I wondered if that little flutter in the pit of my stomach was a good thing.
“I called in at your house,” he said as soon as I answered the phone.
“At my—really? And you survived?”
He laughed, and that little flutter moved superfast. “Just about. You had to be the only girl in the family, didn’t you?”
“Their bark is worse than their bite.” Unless they were on four legs and covered in fur.
“It’s cool. So what are you doing?”
“Erm, I’m at the zoo with my brother and his girlfriend.”
He laughed again, but when he spoke I heard disappointment. “I guess you won’t be around today.”
“I kinda thought you were busy. You know, with Ger and all.” I held my breath.
“Definitely not busy. Maybe I should have texted you first.”
“Maybe.” Suddenly my voice sounded deeper, kind of flirty. How did that happen?
“So if I text you tonight, do you think you might come out for a while?”
This time I laughed. “I might. But I better go now. I’ll tell the lions you said hello.”
By the time I got back to Nathan and Perdita, I felt so much better. Maybe I did like Connor after all. We moved along the enclosures, and even the screaming kids stopped bothering me as I thought about what Connor and I might do that evening.
Then we found the wolves.
Nathan leaned against the enclosure, pain in his expression, but all I cared about was the way all of the wolves kept their eyes on me. I inched closer to Nathan, and the eyes all followed. They knew. They knew my secrets. They could tell I was wrong somehow. They knew more than my own family.
“I feel bad for them,” Nathan said.
“Me too,” I whispered. “They look so bored.”
Ordinarily, they might have been bored, but now they were interested in me and couldn’t take their eyes off me. One approached, and I held my breath. His howl tore through me, breaking my heart.
I grabbed Nathan’s arm as more of them approached, coming out from behind rocks to warn me off and defend themselves. What was so scary about me?
“They’re scared of me,” Nathan said. “What am I supposed to be?”
I glanced at him in alarm. Did he not see how they were looking at me? Wary of me?
Perdita led us both away as the entire zoo went crazy. The wolves kicked off all of the other animals, and I heard screeches and whines and an awful thudding as the gorillas threw themselves at the barrier that caged them.
Outside, I couldn’t help hugging myself. “That was so strange.” My voice shook, and my hands trembled. The reaction of the wolves had verified all of my secret suspicions.
Perdita tried to cheer up Nathan, but I could barely breathe because I was so freaked out. The animals had responded to me. I felt as though I should let Nathan know so he’d stop beating himself up about it, but then he would discover the thing I had suspected for a while now, about myself. There was something really wrong with me.
I heard Perdita mention something about dead gypsies wanting her and him to be together.
“One gypsy,” I said before I could stop myself. They both turned to look at me, and I panicked.
“What?” Nathan said, but there was something in his voice, an underlying anger that made me want to cry.
“I need to go home. I’m not feeling so good.” I did feel like crap, and my head was more screwed up than ever. Agitation drew around my body and needled my nerves.
As soon as we got off the bus, I hurried on ahead, unwilling to stand next to Nathan and Perdita. I wanted to throw up, but I had to make it to the house. I ran up the driveway, practically shouldered my way in the door, and made it to the stairs before falling down. Jeremy caught me before my head connected with the floor.
“I tripped!” I half-screamed at him before running upstairs, stumbling over my feet. I made it to the bathroom, slammed the door behind me and retched. Nothing came up. I felt as though I was hacking up my guts, and while there was a terrible taste in my mouth, my queasy stomach refused to empty itself.
I needed to go to bed. But Jeremy was outside my bedroom, waiting for me. “You’re not pregnant, are you?” he asked, smiling.
“Shut up,” I said, still feeling woozy. He caught my arm as I stumbled again.
“You should lie down before you hurt yourself,” he warned.
“I’m trying to.”
“There’s something going on downstairs.” He hesitated. “I’ll be back to check on you.”
“Leave me alone. I need to sleep.
”
And sleep I did. Until the afternoon of the next day. My eyes wouldn’t open properly, and I felt exhausted, still, as though even sleep drained me of energy. Someone left me food and water, but I couldn’t sit up long enough to consume anything.
I seriously suspected I might be dying.
***
Kali
She was woken roughly during the night. She reached out for her sister, but nobody was there.
“Wake up. You’re needed.”
Eyes still blurred with sleep, she allowed Drina’s sister-in-law to lead the way. Then she remembered. Chovihani. She was needed. Someone was ailing, most likely.
Nothing could have prepared her for the scene.
Her sister, draped in bloody cloths, lay in a dead faint. Her face was drawn and deathly pale. Women gathered around her. One was a midwife.
“But it’s too early,” Kali blurted. Drina had at least six weeks to go. An early birth was no great thing.
Drina opened her eyes and moaned.
“It’s her time. Give her something for pain,” said the traditional midwife, an elderly woman who had helped pregnant gypsies for years.
Kali took one look at her sister’s eyes, eyes that didn’t see her, and ran. She screamed for her father’s help, but she knew he wouldn’t come.
Death was coming instead.
Her trembling hands found remedies among her belongings. On stumbling feet, she returned to her sister’s confinement. She patted powder on her sister’s dry lips, bade her to lick, and then forced a long swallow of a potent drink down her throat.
Drina’s eyes found Kali’s, and she managed a smile. “Do you see my future, little sister?”
Adversity (Cursed #2.5) Page 12