His Lover's Little Secret

by Andrea Laurence

  Never in his wildest dreams did he expect the answer to be “raising his child.”

  Sabine straightened her spine, her sharp chin tipping up in defiance. She projected an air of confidence in any situation and had the steel backbone to stand behind it. She certainly had spunk; he’d loved that about her once. Now, he could tell it would be an annoyance.

  She looked him straight in the eye and said, “He’s inside. And right now, that’s where he’s staying.”

  The bold honesty of her words was like a fist to his gut. The air rushed from his lungs. It was true. He had a son. A son! He hadn’t entirely believed Clay’s story until that precise moment. He’d known his best friend since they were roommates in college, one of the few constants in his life, but he couldn’t always trust Clay’s version of reality. Tonight, he’d insisted that Gavin locate Sabine as soon as possible to find out about her young son.

  And he’d been right. For once.

  Sabine didn’t deny it. He’d expected her to tell him it wasn’t his child or insist she was babysitting for a friend, but she had always been honest to a fault. Instead, she’d flat-out admitted she’d hidden his child from him and made no apologies about it. She even had the audacity to start making demands about how this was going to go down. She’d been in control of this situation for far too long. He was about to be included and in a big way.

  “He’s really my son?” He needed to hear the words from her, although he would demand a DNA test to confirm it no matter what she said.

  Sabine swallowed and nodded. “He looks just like you.”

  The blood started pumping furiously in Gavin’s ears. He might be able to understand why she kept it a secret if she was uncertain he was the father, but there was no doubt in her mind. She simply hadn’t wanted him involved. She didn’t want the inconvenience of having to share him with someone else. If not for Clay seeing her, he still wouldn’t know he had a child.

  His jaw tightened and his teeth clenched together. “Were you ever going to tell me I had a son, Sabine?”

  Her pale green gaze burrowed into him as she crossed her arms over her chest. “No.”

  She didn’t even bother to lie about it and make herself look less like the deceitful, selfish person she was. She just stood there, looking unapologetic, while unconsciously pressing her breasts up out of the top of her sports bra. His brain flashed between thoughts like a broken television as his eyes ran over the soft curves of her body and his ears tried to process her response. Anger, desire, betrayal and a fierce need to possess her rushed through his veins, exploding out of him in words.

  “What do you mean, no?” Gavin roared.

  “Keep it down!” Sabine demanded between gritted teeth, glancing nervously over her shoulder into the apartment. “I don’t want him to hear us, and I certainly don’t want all my neighbors to hear us, either.”

  “Well I’m sorry to embarrass you in front of your neighbors. I just found out I have a two-year-old son that I’ve never met. I think that gives me the right to be angry.”

  Sabine took a deep breath, amazing him with her ability to appear so calm. “You have every right to be angry. But yelling won’t change anything. And I won’t have you raising your voice around my son.”

  “Our son,” Gavin corrected.

  “No,” she said with a sharp point of her finger. “He’s my son. According to his birth certificate, he’s an immaculate conception. Right now, you have no legal claim to him and no right to tell me how to do anything where he’s concerned. You got that?”

  That situation would be remedied and soon. “For now. But don’t think your selfish monopoly on our son will last for much longer.”

  A crimson flush rushed to her cheeks, bringing color to her flawless, porcelain skin. She had gotten far too comfortable calling the shots. He could tell she didn’t like him making demands. Too bad for her. He had a vote now and it was long overdue.

  She swallowed and brushed her purple-highlighted ponytail over her shoulder but didn’t back down. “It’s after seven-thirty on a Wednesday night, so you can safely bet that’s how it’s going to stay for the immediate future.”

  Gavin laughed at her bold naïveté. “Do you honestly think my lawyers don’t answer the phone at 2:00 a.m. when I call? For what I pay them, they do what I want, when I want.” He slipped his hand into his suit coat and pulled his phone out of his inner breast pocket. “Shall we call Edmund and see if he’s available?”

  Her eyes widened slightly at his challenge. “Go ahead, Gavin. Any lawyer worth his salt is going to insist on a DNA test. It takes no less than three days to get the results of a paternity test back from a lab. If you push me, I’ll see to it that you don’t set eyes on him until the results come back. If we test first thing in the morning, that would mean Monday by my estimation.”

  Gavin’s hands curled into tight fists at his sides. She’d had years to prepare for this moment and she’d done her homework. He knew she was right. The labs probably wouldn’t process the results over the weekend, so it would be Monday at the earliest before he could get his lawyer involved and start making parental demands. But once he could lay claim to his son, she had better watch out.

  “I want to see my son,” he said. This time his tone was less heated and demanding.

  “Then calm down and take your thumb off your lawyer’s speed dial.”

  Gavin slipped his cell phone back into his pocket. “Happy?”

  Sabine didn’t seem happy, but she nodded anyway. “Now, before I let you in, we need to discuss some ground rules.”

  He took a deep breath to choke back his rude retort. Few people had the audacity to tell him what to do, but if anyone would, it was Sabine. He would stick to her requirements for now, but before long, Gavin would be making the rules. “Yes?”

  “Number one, you are not to yell when you are in my apartment or anywhere Jared might be. I don’t want you upsetting him.”

  Jared. His son’s name was Jared. This outrageous scenario was getting more and more real. “What’s his middle name?” Gavin couldn’t stop himself from asking. He suddenly wanted to know everything he could about his son. There was no way to gain back the time he’d lost, but he would do everything in his power to catch up on what he missed.

  “Thomas. Jared Thomas Hayes.”

  Thomas was his middle name. Was that a coincidence? He couldn’t remember if Sabine knew it or not. “Why Thomas?”

  “For my art teacher in high school, Mr. Thomas. He’s the only one that ever encouraged my painting. Since that was also your middle name, it seemed fitting. Number two,” she continued. “Do not tell him you’re his father. Not until it is legally confirmed and we are both comfortable with the timing. I don’t want him confused and worried about what’s going on.”

  “Who does he think his father is?”

  Sabine shook her head dismissively. “He’s not even two. He hasn’t started asking questions about things like that yet.”

  “Fine,” he agreed, relieved that if nothing else, his son hadn’t noticed the absence of a father in his life. He knew how painful that could be. “Enough rules. I want to see Jared.” His son’s name felt alien on his tongue. He wanted a face to put with the name and know his son at last.

  “Okay.” Sabine shifted her weight against the door, slowly slinking into the apartment.

  Gavin moved forward, stepping over the threshold. He’d been to her apartment before, a long time ago. He remembered a fairly sparse but eclectic space with mismatched thrift store furniture. Her paintings had dotted the walls, her portfolio and bag of supplies usually sitting near the door.

  When he barely missed stepping on a chubby blue crayon instead of a paintbrush, he knew things were truly different. Looking around, he noticed a lot had changed. The furniture was newer but still a mishmash of pieces. Interspersed with it were brightly colored plastic toys like a tiny basketball hoop and a tricycle with superheroes on it. A television in the corner loudly played a children�
�s show.

  And when Sabine stepped aside, he saw the small, dark-haired boy sitting on the floor in front of it. The child didn’t turn to look at him. He was immersed in bobbing his head and singing along to the song playing on the show, a toy truck clutched in his hand.

  Gavin swallowed hard and took another step into the apartment so Sabine could close the door behind him. He watched her walk over to the child and crouch down.

  “Jared, we have a visitor. Let’s say hello.”

  The little boy set down his truck and crawled to his feet. When he turned to look at Gavin, he felt his heart skip a beat in his chest. The tiny boy looked exactly like he had as a child. It was as though a picture had been snatched from his baby album and brought to life. From his pink cheeks smeared with tomato sauce, to the wide, dark eyes that looked at him with curiosity, he was very much Gavin’s son.

  The little boy smiled, revealing tiny baby teeth. “Hi.”

  Gavin struggled to respond at first. His chest was tight with emotions he never expected in this moment. This morning, he woke up worried about his latest business acquisition and now he was meeting his child for the first time. “Hi, Jared,” he choked out.

  “Jared, this is Mommy’s friend Gavin.”

  Gavin took a hesitant step forward and knelt down to bring himself to the child’s level. “How are you doing, big guy?”

  Jared responded with a flow of gibberish he couldn’t understand. Gavin hadn’t been around many small children, and he wasn’t equipped to translate. He could pick out a few words—school, train and something close to spaghetti. The rest was lost on him, but Jared didn’t seem to mind. Pausing in his tale, he picked up his favorite truck and held it out to Gavin. “My truck!” he declared.

  He took the small toy from his son. “It’s very nice. Thank you.”

  A soft knock sounded at the front door. Sabine frowned and stood up. “That’s the babysitter. I’ve got to go.”

  Gavin swallowed his irritation. He’d had a whole two minutes with his son and she was trying to push him out the door. They hadn’t even gotten around to discussing her actions and what they were going to do about this situation. He watched her walk to the door and let in a middle-aged woman in a sweater with cats on it.

  “Hey, Tina. Come on in. He’s had his dinner and he’s just watching television.”

  “I’ll get him in the bath and in bed by eight-thirty.”

  “Thanks, Tina. I should be home around the usual time.”

  Gavin handed the truck back to Jared and reluctantly stood. He wasn’t going to hang around while the neighbor lady was here. He turned in time to see Sabine slip into a hoodie and tug a sling with a rolled-up exercise mat over her shoulder.

  “Gavin, I’ve got to go. I’m teaching a class tonight.”

  He nodded and gave a quick look back at Jared. He’d returned to watching his show, doing a little monkey dance along with the other children and totally unaware of what was really going on around him. Gavin wanted to reach out to him again, to say goodbye or hug him, but he refrained. There would be time for all that later. For the first time in his life, he had someone who would be legally bound to him for the next sixteen years and wouldn’t breeze in and out of his life like so many others. They would have more time together.

  Right now, he needed to deal with the mother of his child.

  Two

  “I don’t need you to drive me to class.”

  Gavin stood holding open the passenger door of his Aston Martin with a frown lining his face. Sabine knew she didn’t want to get in the car with him. Getting in would mean a private tongue-lashing she wasn’t ready for yet. She’d happily take the bus to avoid this.

  “Just get in the car, Sabine. The longer we argue, the later you’ll be.”

  Sabine watched the bus blow by the stop up the street and swore under her breath. She’d never make it to class in time unless she gave in and let him drive her there. Sighing in defeat, she climbed inside. Gavin closed the door and got in on his side. “Go up the block and turn right at the light,” she instructed. If she could focus on directions, perhaps they’d have less time to talk about what she’d done.

  She already had a miserably guilty conscience. It wasn’t like she could look at Jared without thinking of Gavin. Lying to him was never something she intended to do, but the moment she found out she was pregnant, she was overcome with a fierce territorial and protective urge. She and Gavin were from different planets. He never really cared for her the way she did for him. The same would hold true for their son. Jared would be acquired just like any other asset of the Brooks Empire. He deserved better than that. Better than what Gavin had been given.

  She did what she thought she had to do to protect her child, and she wouldn’t apologize for it. “At the second light, turn left.”

  Gavin remained silent as they drove, unnerving her more with every minute that ticked by. She was keenly aware of the way his hands tightly gripped the leather steering wheel. The tension was evident in every muscle of his body, straining the threads of his designer suit. His smooth, square jaw was flexed as though it took everything he had to keep his emotions in check and his eyes on the road.

  It was a practiced skill of Gavin’s. When they were together, he always kept his feelings tamped down. The night she told him they were over, there had barely been a flicker of emotion in his eyes. Not anger. Not sadness. Not even a “don’t let the door hit you on the way out.” Just a solemnly resigned nod and she was dismissed from his life. He obviously never really cared for Sabine. But this might be the situation that caused him to finally blow.

  When his car pulled to a stop outside the community center where she taught, he shifted into Neutral, pulled the parking brake and killed the engine. He glanced down at his Rolex. “You’re early.”

  She was. She didn’t have to be inside for another fifteen minutes. He’d driven a great deal faster than the bus and hadn’t stopped every block to pick up people. It was pointless to get out of the car and stand in front of the building to wait for the previous class to end. That meant time in the car alone with Gavin. Just perfect.

  After an extended silence, he spoke. “So, was I horrible to you? Did I treat you badly?” His low voice was quiet, his eyes focused not on her but on something through the windshield ahead of them.

  Sabine silently groaned. Somehow she preferred the yelling to this. “Of course not.”

  He turned to look at her then, pinning her with his dark eyes. “Did I say or do anything while we were together to make you think I would be a bad father?”

  A bad father? No. Perhaps a distracted one. A distant one. An absent one. Or worse, a reluctant one. But not a bad father. “No. Gavin, I—”

  “Then why, Sabine? Why would you keep something so important from me? Why would you keep me from being in Jared’s life? He’s young now, but eventually he’d notice he didn’t have a daddy like other kids. What if he thought I didn’t want him? Christ, Sabine. He may not have been planned, but he’s still my son.”

  When he said it like that, every excuse in her mind sounded ridiculous. How could she explain that she didn’t want Jared to grow up spoiled, rich but unloved? That she wanted him with her, not at some expensive boarding school? That she didn’t want him to become a successful, miserable shell of a man like his father? All those excuses resulted from her primary fear that she couldn’t shake. “I was afraid I would lose him.”

  Gavin’s jaw still flexed with pent-up emotions. “You thought I would take him from you?”

  “Wouldn’t you?” Her gaze fixed on him, a challenge in her eyes. “Wouldn’t you have swooped in the minute he was born and claimed him as your own? I’m sure your fancy friends and family would be horrified that a person like me was raising the future Brooks Express Shipping heir. It wouldn’t be hard to deem me an unfit mother and have some judge from your father’s social club grant you full custody.”

  “I wouldn’t have done that.”

  �
��I’m sure you only would’ve done what you thought was best for your son, but how was I to know what that would entail? What would happen if you decided he would be better off with you and I was just a complication? I wouldn’t have enough money or connections to fight you. I couldn’t risk it.” Sabine felt the tears prickling her eyes, but she refused to cry in front of Gavin.

  “I couldn’t bear the thought of you handing him off to nannies and tutors. Buying his affection with expensive gifts because you were too busy building the family company to spend time with him. Shipping him off to some boarding school as soon as he was old enough, under the guise of getting him the best education when you really just want him out of your hair. Jared wasn’t planned. He wasn’t the golden child of your socially acceptable marriage. You might want him on principle, but I couldn’t be certain you would love him.”

  Gavin sat silent for a moment, listening to her tirade. The anger seemed to have run its course. Now he just looked emotionally spent, his dark eyes tired. He looked just like Jared after a long day without a nap.

  Sabine wanted to brush the dark strands of hair from his weary eyes and press her palm against the rough stubble of his cheek. She knew exactly how it would feel. Exactly how his skin would smell...an intoxicating mixture of soap, leather and male. But she wouldn’t. Her attraction to Gavin was a hurdle she had to overcome to leave him the first time. The years hadn’t dulled her reaction to him. Now, it would be an even larger complication she didn’t need.

  “I don’t understand why you would think that,” he said at last, his words quieter now.

  “Because that’s what happened to you, Gavin.” She lowered her voice to a soft, conversational tone. “And it’s the only way you know how to raise a child. Nannies and boarding schools are normal to you. You told me yourself how your parents were always too busy for you and your siblings. How your house cycled through nannies like some people went through tissue paper. Do you remember telling me about how miserable and lonely you were when they sent you away to school? Why would I want that for Jared? Even if it came with all the money and luxury in the world? I wasn’t about to hand him over to you so he could live the same hollow life you had. I didn’t want him to be groomed to be the next CEO of Brooks Express Shipping.”