Cut Free (The Sublime Book 4)

by Julia Wolf

  “I think you were right about the convertible,” I said.

  “Was I?” He sounded quite smug at my admission.

  “Yes. Thank you for doing this for me. No one has ever done anything like this for me.”

  He reached over and squeezed my arm. “That’s a real shame.” His hand lingered, softly resting there, until he finally pulled away and placed it back on the steering wheel.

  When we pulled up in front of my building, we turned toward each other.

  “This was one for the record books, Charlie.”

  He leaned over and pushed my bangs to the side, just as he’d done at the beginning of the day. “Just wait for all the things I have in store for you, Eliza.”

  The moment was perfect. And because it was so perfect, I had to ruin it by being awkward. Just as I stretched across the console to kiss Charlie’s cheek, he leaned back in his seat. So there I was, lips pursed, hanging there all by myself. I tried to play it off by blowing him a kiss, but I could tell I wasn’t fooling anyone. I wanted to curl up and die right then and there.

  Instead, I got out of the car as quickly as humanly possible and ran up the steps, yelling, “Bye, Charlie!” over my shoulder. When I went inside, I pulled back the curtain of my front window to peek out. Charlie was still idling by the curb, his head on the steering wheel.

  Instead of Miss Eliza, I should have been known as Eliza Goldberg, Ruiner of All the Things. Because obviously I could never see him again, no matter how perfect our day had been. Game’s over; pack it in. I was much too humiliated to go on.

  Seven

  I sat on a round, tufted, pink ottoman, sipping champagne and watching Frannie twirl in front of a wall of mirrors.

  She held out the flouncy red material of her skirt. “I don’t know, Rach, I might steal the show. I’m awfully pretty!”

  From behind a curtain equally as pink as the ottoman I was on, Rachel called, “Don’t be so sure, Frananas. I’m looking pretty fabulous right now.” She pushed the curtain aside and stepped out. I gasped when I saw her. Even without her hair and makeup done, she looked like a Greek goddess.

  “Oh, Rachel, that dress…” I started.

  “You win!” declared Frannie.

  Rachel smiled down at her wedding dress. “I know.”

  Her cream lace dress was flowy and lightweight, nothing like the princess gown she’d gotten married in the first time. The cap sleeves were sheer, and the sweetheart neckline plunged just the right amount. I had never seen her look more beautiful, from the rose in her cheeks to the smile lighting up her entire face.

  I pulled her into a tight hug. “I’m so very happy for you, Rach.”

  “You’re going to make me cry!” She sniffled into my hair.

  “Get all the tears out now so you don’t ruin your makeup on your wedding day.” Frannie wrapped her arms around the two of us and we stood in the middle of the bridal salon hugging, laughing, and tearing up. Our sweet girl was getting married, and it finally really hit me when I saw her in her dress.

  I had always been a romantic at heart—had always believed in true love. For the past few years, I’d believed in it more for other people than myself. But seeing Rachel come out the other side of a relationship distinctly similar to the one I’d just ended with Edward made me think all of this could still be me one day too. And I did want this. I wanted the flowers and hearts and romance. I wasn’t in a hurry. I wasn’t going to go hunting for it. I wasn’t even sure I was ready for it. But if I found it, I wouldn’t turn away from it either.

  “There is absolutely no way I won’t be crying on my wedding day. Do you even know me at all?” Rachel asked.

  Frannie kissed the top of her head and laughed. “I know. I never cry, and I’m pretty positive I’ll be sobbing right along with you. But then we can go pet the baby goats and everything will be better.”

  Rachel and Joe were getting married on the farm where Frannie’s boyfriend, James, grew up. Frannie had become kind of obsessed with the goats. The wallpaper on her phone was a picture of her favorite goat on the farm. I was pretty certain the goats were not going to be a part of the wedding, but there was a rumor there would be fresh goat cheese.

  “I’m just going to have to hold it together long enough to play your songs,” I said.

  Rachel stepped up on a platform and a seamstress started sticking pins in the spots on her dress that needed to be altered.

  “Which reminds me, Joe finally chose!”

  “Tell me!” I said.

  “Okay, don’t judge. Joe and I went round and round about this, but we finally decided. It’s unconventional, but he wants to walk in with his parents to ‘Creep.’”

  Frannie snorted. “Oh my god, that’s so Joe.”

  “The song by Radiohead?” I asked.

  Rachel nodded. “Yeah, we have a running joke about what a creep Joe is, so it seems fitting. I’m going to walk in to ‘Nothing Compares 2 U,’ and then we’ll walk out together to Queen’s ‘You’re My Best Friend.’ Think you can handle it?”

  “I can definitely handle it.” I hoped I sounded a hell of a lot more confident than I felt.

  My stomach lurched, and my lunch threatened to make a reappearance. Those were big songs—songs I had never played before. I would have to do a lot more practicing than the one hour a day I’d been doing. And I’d have to face Charlie after humiliating myself the day before. I’d avoided him this morning, setting off for my run earlier than normal and on a different route, which only made me feel worse.

  After Rachel finished her dress fitting, Frannie and I had ours. Frannie had been right, our dresses were adorable. Hers was strapless, and mine had cap sleeves that mimicked Rachel’s, but both were flowy and knee-length. I’d been prepared to suck it up and wear whatever monstrosity Rachel picked out, because that seemed to be a bridesmaid rite of passage, but Frannie wasn’t having it. And now, standing in my pretty red dress, I was thankful she’d put her foot down.

  Frannie looked up from her phone. “Laurel’s at Bar Royal and James is working, if you guys want to head over there for a bit. We can have a drink and a late dinner. They only have bar food, though. Sorry, E.”

  “Actually, I’m starving, so I could go for some loaded potato skins right now.” We’d left work early to go to Baltimore for the fitting and none of us had eaten dinner yet. Since Frannie’s old roommate, Laurel, and her boyfriend, James, were both at the bar, it sounded like a perfect cap to the day.

  “I’m up for it. Joe’s out with some of his co-workers, so I’m not in a rush to get home,” Rachel said.

  Once we changed back into our regular clothes and pulled Rachel away from her wedding dress, we headed over to Bar Royal. It was a couple steps up from a dive bar and Frannie’s favorite haunt, especially because James worked there.

  We found Laurel at a high-top table drinking a beer. She hopped up when she saw us and threw her arms out. “Hey, ladies!”

  There were hugs all around, and then Frannie’s man sauntered over, and she buried her hands in his thick beard while he wrapped her up in his tree-trunk arms. Frannie was a willowy brunette, with delicate features, and James looked like a red-haired hipster lumberjack. In theory, they didn’t go together at all, but the first time I saw them together as a couple, they made sense.

  I was the first to sit down when I saw potato skins dropped off at the table. When Rachel sat next to me, I pulled the plate toward me.

  “Mine!” I said.

  She laughed. “I’m pulling the bride card. You have to share!”

  “Can you pull the bride card a month before the wedding?”

  “Of course. It’s like how you have a year from the date of the wedding to send a gift.”

  “You can pull the bride card for a year?”

  Rachel tucked a strand of red hair behind her ear. “I can, but I’ll use my power for good, not evil.”

  “Okay, you can have one,” I said.

  “Is it okay if I join you for a few minute
s?” James asked in his low, rumbly voice.

  “Of course, you big hunk,” Laurel cooed. I had only ever seen her in one of three modes: serious lawyer, hilarious party girl, or unapologetic flirt. Tonight, she seemed to be in mode three.

  “So, what’s new, everyone? I feel like I’m so out of the loop all by myself in Baltimore! I need to come get my hair cut so I can catch up,” Laurel said.

  “We just saw Rachel’s wedding dress, and she looked outrageously beautiful in it,” Frannie said.

  “I’m so excited for your wedding! Frannie said there will be goats,” Laurel said.

  “The goats will not be in our actual wedding, but you can visit them.”

  “Be prepared to fall in love,” Frannie warned.

  “What about you, Eliza? What have you been up to?” Laurel asked.

  Everyone turned to me just as I took a bite out of a mozzarella stick. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d eaten something fried, but it was addictively good. I almost wished I hadn’t tasted it because I had a feeling I’d be craving it.

  After I swallowed, I said, “I signed up for a marathon two weeks after the wedding. So I’ve been training.”

  Rachel elbowed me. “You didn’t tell me that!”

  “It was a spur of the moment decision.”

  “You made a spur of the moment decision?” Frannie asked.

  “Well, I was sort of pushed into it.”

  “Elaborate,” demanded Laurel.

  “I started running with Charlie, and—”

  Frannie slapped the table. “What?”

  “Charlie from Friendsgiving?” Laurel asked.

  “The very one,” I replied.

  “How did that happen? I mean, I’m excited you’re hanging out or whatever you’re doing, but I’m surprised,” Rachel said.

  “He really just invited himself into my life, and it’s been...fun. He’s weird in the very best way. And now we’re training for the marathon together.”

  I looked around the table, and each of my friends was gaping at me, except James. He was leaned back, his arm around Frannie, swallowing back his beer, taking it all in.

  “I feel like I’ve missed something,” Rachel said.

  “You haven’t! We’ve been running, and he took me to the horse races—”

  Frannie slapped the table again. “The horse races?”

  I laughed at how worked up she was getting.

  “Yes! He’s helping me rebel. So, we bet on horse races.” Then I mumbled, “And he picked me up in a yellow convertible.”

  “That sounds like a date!” Laurel said.

  I shook my head vehemently. “I promise you, it wasn’t. We’ve friend-zoned each other.”

  “Why? He’s so cute!” said Laurel.

  “He’s gorgeous, but I don’t think he’s into serious relationships, and it seems unwise to start anything casual with someone who lives right across the street from me. Not that he’s given any indication he’d want that anyway.”

  “Maybe he’s waiting for you to make a move,” Laurel said.

  James scoffed before taking a swig of his beer.

  Frannie tugged his beard. “Speak!”

  He cleared his throat. “I barely know the guy, but he seemed pretty straightforward to me. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for Eliza to try to decipher how he feels. He would probably tell her if he wanted more.”

  My heart sank slightly, but I knew he was right. I could always use another friend and so far, Charlie had proven himself to be exceptional at it.

  “I need to know more about this yellow convertible,” Frannie said, and then she slapped her hand on the table for good measure.

  So, I told them about our day at the races and our training schedule. I didn’t tell them about my awkward air-kiss and how I had avoided him that morning.

  When the Charlie topic was exhausted, we played a round each of foosball and pinball, then went our separate ways for the night.

  Climbing the stairs to my apartment, I was tired but happy. A night out with my girlfriends had been just what I needed. It felt like I’d entered back into the land of the living over the last couple weeks, and I gave a lot of credit to Charlie for pushing me.

  There was an envelope on my welcome mat with my name written in that now familiar messy scrawl. No ‘miss,’ though.

  Dear Eliza,

  You were suspiciously absent this morning. Did you happen to ditch me? I’ll have you know I had to run all by myself and it was BORING. Please don’t make me do that again. We don’t even have to talk about the thing that happened when I dropped you off. What thing that happened? I don’t even remember. What are we talking about? Who are you? Why are you looking at me? See? I don’t even remember the thing anymore.

  I’ll be outside in the morning, same time, same place. Don’t stand me up, or I might be forced to go back to bed, and then the whole training schedule will be thrown off and I’ll feel like a failure and start a downward spiral...you wouldn’t want that, would you, Eliza?

  Your New BFF,

  Charlie Hamada

  I held the card to my chest and smiled. This man baffled me, only because I had never met anyone like him. But I liked that. I liked it a lot.

  Eight

  Charlie was waiting in front of his building, but this time, he was wide awake, a big grin on his face when he saw me.

  I crossed the street to him and couldn’t stop the smile that had bubbled up from deep inside my chest.

  “You came!” he called.

  I jogged to him, and we took off together. “I’m sorry I left you hanging yesterday,” I said.

  “Yeah, what was up with that?”

  “I just wanted to run a different route.”

  “By yourself?”

  “Yes, by myself. Sometimes I like quiet when I run.”

  Charlie scoffed. “I can be quiet!”

  I just looked at him with a raised eyebrow.

  “I can, Eliza. You have no idea how quiet I can be.”

  “You’re right, I don’t.”

  He elbowed my bicep. “You’re just too fun to talk to.”

  “I think that’s you, Charlie.”

  He chuckled. “So, you sure you didn’t want to run with me because of the thing?”

  “What thing?”

  “The thing that didn’t happen.”

  I sighed. “I wasn’t trying to kiss you, Charlie.”

  “That’s your story?” he asked.

  “Don’t make me kick you! It’s not a story. I was trying to kiss your cheek, but you moved, okay?”

  “Well, damn, I really screwed up, didn’t I? Can I get a do-over?”

  “Nope. I was caught up in the vibes of the great day we had. Can’t be replicated,” I said firmly.

  “That sounds like a challenge, Miss Eliza.”

  “It really isn’t. Between learning three songs for Rachel and Joe’s wedding and other general bridesmaid duties I’m sure she’ll throw at me, plus training for the marathon, I don’t know if I’ll have time for any adventures.”

  We turned around and headed back toward town. Today would be a shorter run, but according to the training schedule we were following, we were going to be running fourteen miles this weekend. I didn’t usually go beyond ten, but fourteen seemed doable. On the other hand, the most Charlie had ever run was six miles, so I had a feeling that would make it more of a challenge. Some sick part of me was looking forward to seeing how we conquered it.

  “Nonsense. There’s always time for adventure!”

  I giggled. “Did you just say ‘nonsense’?”

  “It’s a good word!”

  “It’s a fine word. I just don’t hear it in everyday conversation.”

  “Well, I’m bringing it back. Along with egads, malarkey, bee’s knees, and rad.”

  “I don’t even know what ‘bee’s knees’ means!”

  Charlie turned around and jogged backwards in front of me. He gave me a big smile, then said, “Eliza, yo
u’re the bee’s knees.”

  I snorted. “That cleared up nothing!”

  He gave me an exaggerated wink. “It means I think you’re rad!”

  Smiling, I rolled my eyes. “Egads, what malarkey!” I said.

  Charlie laughed and threw his arm around my shoulder. “See? You’re rad, and I don’t want any arguments.”

  “On the subject of rad, you never told me what you did when you toured with a band.”

  “Ah, my rock star years. I spent six years on the road with a semi-famous rock band. I was a guitar technician and assistant to the sound tech. They’re still touring, but those six years felt like double that. That lifestyle is rough on the body and spirit.”

  “Ah, so the ‘too many women’ and ‘too much drinking’ makes sense now.”

  “Yep. I’m glad I lived the wanderer’s life. I don’t regret any of it. But having roots is pretty rad too.”

  “Rad is over, Charlie.”

  “Don’t break my heart, Eliza.”

  “I would never.”

  He glanced over at me. “I don’t know. You strike me as the ultimate breaker of hearts.”

  “That’s funny.”

  “And by ‘that’s funny,’ you mean not funny at all?”

  “It’s not accurate. Someone has to have a heart in order for you to break it, and I’m pretty sure Edward was completely lacking in that department.”

  “He’s your only ex-boyfriend?” Charlie asked, disbelief in his tone.

  “Basically. My parents were suffocatingly strict when I was growing up. I wasn’t allowed to date at all in high school. I snuck around a bit and managed to go to my high school prom with a guy I liked, and then in college, I dated here and there, but Edward was my only real relationship.”

  “Huh. That’s hard to believe.”

  “Why?”

  “You’re just so…”

  “So what?” I asked.

  “You’re just a lovely person, Eliza. I picture you breaking hearts left and right without even knowing it.”

  I scrunched up my nose. “That’s not a very flattering image.”