Hell House Returns 4: Reality TV Drama

by Brenda Hampton

  He laughed and crossed his arms. “The first lady and I will be fine, but whenever I need to get some sleep, and whenever I need to step away from everyone, I’ll keep that comfortable bed you have in there in mind.”

  He turned to walk away. As he tackled the stairs, I just shook my head. Some ho’s were so lucky and didn’t even know it.

  I’d called the doctor, and when he got there, he said Roc had a bad sprain. He wrapped his ankle with a stretch bandage and gave him pills for the pain. After the doctor left, I cooked, and for most of the day, we all chilled outside and in the game room. It wasn’t until about eight o’clock when we decided to go to the theater room and watch a movie together. The problem was we couldn’t agree on what to watch. The men wanted to watch a comedy movie, but the ladies wanted to watch Fences, starring Denzel Washington.

  “Yes, lawd,” Evelyn said. “I’ve seen every single movie that man has starred in, since Mo’ Better Blues.”

  Chase high-fived her. “Me too. I don’t care how old he gets or what kind of role he plays, he owns it, doesn’t he?”

  We all agreed.

  “I jumped on his team after Training Day,” I admitted. “He reminded me of my ex, Kiley, and all that thug stuff going on sold me. I think I’ve watched that movie about ten or twenty times.”

  “He definitely deserved an award for that movie,” Scorpio said. “And he should have waaay more awards because the man is not only fine, but very brilliant as well. I find myself in a daze while watching his interviews. He’s so intelligent, and when those lips move I be like . . . God, help me, please.”

  Keith cleared his throat. “It would be nice if you ladies would have a seat so we can start checking out this Kevin Hart movie. It’s not happening with Denzel tonight, sorry.”

  “It sure in the hell ain’t,” Roc said. “So forget it and enjoy the popcorn.”

  Scorpio looked at the president. “Mr. President, what would you like to watch? A vote will swing this in our favor regardless, but do you care if we watch Denzel or not?”

  He sat up straight, wringing his hands together. “I say give the women what they want; therefore, Denzel wins. I heard Fences was really a good movie.”

  Roc and Keith plopped back in their seats, cutting their eyes at all of us. “Man, that’s bullshit,” Roc said. “I’m cool with Denzel’s movies too, but I’d rather be laughing tonight, not crying.”

  “Yeah, like you cried when you fell off that treadmill,” I said, causing everyone to laugh again. “If you want to watch a comedy movie, somebody needs to go get that video from the workout room.”

  Roc was the only one not laughing. Instead, he jumped up from the chair and threw his bag of popcorn at me. It went everywhere, and after that, I threw my bag at him. Unfortunately, my bag hit the president dead in his face and busted. Buttered popcorn spilled on him too, causing me to cover my mouth with my hand.

  “Ooooo, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do that, sir, Mr. President.”

  Surprisingly, he fired back at me with his bag. I was being bombarded with popcorn from him, Roc and Keith who was picking up popcorn from the floor, just to throw it at me. I looked at the women who just sat there and giggled.

  “Y’all asses better start helping me,” I said. “How y’all gon’ just sit there and laugh?”

  They joined in, and when all was said and done, popcorn and the other snacks we’d brought into the movie room was everywhere. That even included our drinks that rained on our clothes. It was a mess, but as I observed Roc laying over Scorpio, trying to take some pretzels from her hand, I didn’t like that shit. There was no breathing room between them, and he was right between her legs as they laughed. Evelyn had her legs wrapped around Keith’s back, and as Chase and I double-teamed the president, her ass was all on him. It was becoming clearer to me about who was going to be screwing who. The last thing I wanted was for that bitch Scorpio to get a piece of my Roc. I had to do something about this quick.

  SCORPIO

  I had been having such a good time in Hell House. Not even Jada’s insults bothered me anymore, and I started to realize that she often said things just to get attention. That was fine by me. I couldn’t care less about her, but what I did care about was the ongoing side-eying from Chase that annoyed me from time-to-time. I didn’t like how she kept watching my every move. As if she liked me or something or she desired to have something that I had. I tried to be nice to her, but every time it seemed as if we were starting to get along, she would flip and say or do something that let me know she had something against me.

  Other than her, I was okay. Roc had won me over a little bit, and even though I felt as if he really wasn’t on my level, I had to keep in mind that this was how things were today. In no way would he be involved in my future. A man like him didn’t fit into my world, and just like Keith, Roc didn’t have enough money to get me overly excited about him as a whole. His marital status was another problem. I seriously didn’t want to have another woman all worked up over me, so I had to think long and hard about how I intended to deal with the throbbing in my pussy, every time he stood near me. Every time he playfully wrapped his arms around my waist, whispered something in my ear or just plain ol’ carried on a decent and pleasurable conversation with me. He was a smart man, too, and as I started to indulge in many more conversations with him, I started to see a different side to him. He opened up to me about Desa Rae, his children, where he lived and why he’d gone into hiding. Even told me about why he went to jail—his loyalty to friends and family spoke volumes. I was impressed, just not impressed enough. But slowly but surely, that was starting to change.

  Evelyn had been all over Keith. I barely had time to follow up on what we’d discussed. He kind of kept his distance from me too, and I wasn’t sure if he was actually trying to work through what was going on with him, or if he was upset with me for not having sex with him. He didn’t seem like the type who would get upset about something like that, but, sometimes, you just never knew what other people were thinking. Like the president who looked as if he wanted to slap the shit out of me for not voting for him. Then his eyes said something else. I’d caught him looking at me several times, but when I’d look his way he’d turn his head. He was the one person I truly felt was on my level, more so above it. He was my kind of man for sure, and when they came as powerful as he was, his money status, no matter how much it was, could be overlooked.

  Thing is, I couldn’t figure him out. I didn’t know if he was interested in anyone here, and I wasn’t about to throw myself at him and get embarrassed. When I went to the movie room that night, my intentions were to kick up a conversation with him, see where his head was at, and find out if he was upset with me for not voting for him. I’d felt kind of bad about it, because he seemed to work real hard at trying to improve things in this country. Unfortunately, I was tired that night and wound up falling asleep. When I woke up, he had laid the blanket over me and was gone. I wasn’t sure what time he’d left, but I could have sworn that I felt a gentle kiss on my forehead. Maybe I had been dreaming or tripping for that matter. Nonetheless, there was something about him that intrigued me, more than I was willing to admit.

  The one thing I liked to do from time-to-time, and it also helped me forget about some of the things that were going on in my life, was read. While everyone else was either outside or in the living room talking and eating, I stayed in the bedroom reading a good book that had me flipping the pages like crazy. I couldn’t even put it down to go to the bathroom. It was that good, and the only interruption that came was when Roc rushed into the room, slamming the door behind him.

  “Jada ass is crazy,” he said, laughing while trying to catch his breath. “She out there trying to pour some hot ass water on me.”

  “You must’ve done something awfully bad to her, didn’t you? Because you know Jada is not the kind of woman who will do something like that, just because.”

  “Like hell,” he said then sat on edge of the bed. “Wh
at’s that you reading?”

  I had placed the book on my lap, so I lifted it so he could see the raunchy cover.

  “I’m reading a romance novel that is sexy, drama filled and the plot is better than any other plot I’ve read before.”

  “It must be one of those novels that be making your panties all sticky and wet. I know all about those, and every time Desa Rae gets finished with one of those books, she be horny as hell. She told me some of those books be better than watching a porn movie.”

  “I’d have to agree with her. Some of the books I read definitely take me there, but like the one I’m reading now, it’s taking me there and offering so much more. As I said, this plot has my mind going in circles. Just when I think something is going to happen, the author shocks me. In addition to that, my panties are getting wet and the couple in this book are on fire.”

  Roc was blunt, but playful. “Take them off and let me see for myself how wet they are. Not only that, let me read some parts of the book so I can see if it’ll be suitable for Desa Rae.”

  Now, he didn’t think I wasn’t going to honor his request, did he? I put the book aside, slightly raised my short gown and reached for the string on my thong to remove them. Roc sat in shock as I lifted my butt from the bed and eased down my thong. I tossed it to him; it fell right in his lap.

  “Feel free to examine it.” My legs remained opened. He had a couple of things he could examine.

  “I’ll take your word for it,” he said, removing my thong from his lap and placing it on the bed next to him. He also looked between my legs, and having no shame whatsoever, I opened them even wider, causing him to turn his head. He spoke in a soft tone. “See, you fucking with me now. Don’t do that shit, Ma.”

  I closed my legs and kneeled on the bed, right beside him. My breasts were right at his face; he got a good whiff of my body fragrance that was a sweet heat and spicy. I placed my arms on his shoulders then turned his head to face me.

  “Listen, okay,” I said. “I’m not trying to take you from your wife, nor do I want you to do anything you’ll regret. But with that being said, I’m really feeling you. I wouldn’t mind having sex with you, just once, but at your request, not mine. Give it some thought, and let me know what you decide.”

  After all the joking Roc had done, this time, his facial expression showed seriousness.

  “I’ve heard it all before, Scorpio, and I can recall Chase saying some of that same bullshit to me a while back. But the only person who can take me from my wife is me, not you. I’m the only one who can disrupt my home, and I will give it some thought, but—”

  I had to taste his tongue, so I leaned in, placed my mouth over his and went for it. I felt a little resistance, but when his hand slipped between my thighs, I was in business. His tongue started to dance faster with mine, and just as he leaned in to lay me back, he paused. He couldn’t say one word, because the door flew open and in walked Jada. Her eyes widened. She held on to the doorknob as she dropped to her knees.

  “Mommuuuuh,” she cried out while holding her chest. “Momuh, please come back and help me . . . help me get through thiiiiis!”

  Her loud voice caused Evelyn and Chase to come see what was up. But by that time, Roc was standing. I was sitting on the bed with my legs crossed.

  “What’s wrong?” Evelyn said to Jada. “Did something happen to your mother?”

  Jada dropped her head back, moving it around as if it was limp and couldn’t stay attached to her neck. A tear had even rolled from the corner of her eye. She wiped it.

  “My grandmother been gone since the eighties, but I was thinking about her when I came into the room. The memories brought me to my knees. I just couldn’t take it.”

  Roc walked toward the door, shaking his head. “Man, you be tripping sometimes,” he said. “You need to quit playing so much.”

  Jada snapped and frowned as she barked at him. “Naw, nigga, you the one tripping. I’m trying to save your black ass from these thirsty ho’s in here, but don’t blame me or that crooked dick of yours if you find yourself in trouble again.”

  He held out his hands, firing right back at her. “I’m all about trouble, Ma. It’s whatever.”

  After he walked out, Chase and Evelyn looked at me. Chase’s eyes shifted to my thong on the bed. I happily picked it up, lifted my gown and put it back on. She rolled her eyes and walked out. Evelyn shrugged and did the same. Jada, however, came further into the room, standing next to the bed with her hand on her hip.

  “You need to be ashamed of yourself. That man is married, Scorpio, and why y’all always gotta be chasing after married men? Y’all must be some real unhappy and lonely bitches. I can’t stand homewreckers. First it was Chase, now you.”

  “Excuse me, Jada, but you can’t wreck a home that is already wrecked and damaged in ways that can’t be fixed. I don’t know what the real deal is with Roc, but whatever we do is really none of your business.”

  “If it is wrecked, you ain’t the one to fix it so go sit your happy ass down somewhere and pass the pussy on to someone other than Roc. Please and thank you.”

  “Why should I? Because you want you some? Stop griping and go for it, Jada. Good luck and please do watch how you speak to me. I don’t appreciate your tone, and I will lay you the hell out, if you keep on saying things and confronting me about shit that is in no way your business.”

  I was so mad that I got off the bed, snatched up the book I was reading and left the room. Jada mumbled something, but I just kept it moving. She had one more time to disrespect me. Just one more and that was it.

  Later that day, things had settled down. We were all in the living room having a good time playing cards, charades and singing karaoke. Many of us had had too much to drink, especially Chase and Keith who had been acting real silly. Roc and Jada were high, and even the president looked as if he had tossed back too many glasses of wine. He said he didn’t drink, but I figured that today was an exception.

  “Let’s play another game,” Chase said, scooting to the edge of the sofa, crossing her legs. “It’s called, where are they now: the best sex you’ve ever had.”

  I didn’t have to think long or hard about this—something had already popped into my head. Some looked to be pondering, while others sat around looking as if they were eager to speak up. Jada was the first. She jumped up, rubbing her hands together.

  “Oooo, bay-be let me tell y’all how, where and when it all went down! Me and Kiley Jacoby Abrams were in the backseat of his Cadillac. That thing was brand new, and he had just come from the dealership where he threw big dollars on the table and was like . . . I’m taking this with me now. Anyway, before we got home, he pulled over to the curb, hopped in the back and stripped naked. I wasn’t moving fast enough, so he yanked me by my hair and pulled me on the backseat with him. After that, it was on! He flipped my legs over his shoulders, rolled me into a ball-like position and started tearing it up. I was screaming and hollering . . . man, that shit was sooooo good. Then, I thought he was coming. But when he pulled out and started shaking his thing, hot piss started shooting everywhere. I rubbed it all over me, as if I was bathing in hot water. Y’all just don’t know how good that shit felt. I think I had like four or five orgasms that night. Where is he now? Unfortunately, dead.”

  Jada moved her head from side-to-side, displaying a sad expression. I just sat there with my mouth wide open. I hoped like hell she was joking, but then again, maybe she wasn’t.

  “That was too much information, Jada,” Evelyn said. “I love sex, but I’ve never let any man piss on me. What kind of craziness is that?”

  “If you ain’t tried it,” Jada said, bumping her fist with Roc’s as he put his up. “You can’t knock it.”

  They laughed and then Roc went on to share his story.

  “Mine was on a swing. It was my first time with Desa Rae. The second I entered her, I knew right then I was going to marry her one day. Where is she at right now? Lying in our bed, probably gossiping with
her girlfriend, Monica, and missing the hell out of me.”

  “Awww,” Chase said. “How cute? It’s so obvious that you’ve been missing her too.”

  Roc spoke without hesitating. “Trust me, I am.”

  I kept my comment to myself, but some men sure did have a funny way of showing how much they missed their significant others.

  Keith spoke up next. “I can make this real quick,” he said. “Mine was on vacation in Mexico with Trina. Hands down, the best sex I’ve ever had. Period.”

  “That’s because you haven’t had me yet,” Evelyn said. “Seems like you need a little more experience.”

  Jada reached over and slapped Evelyn across her back. “Talk about messy, that would be you. How you gon’ talk to your best friend’s man like that? I wish I had Trina’s number so I could call her. She need to remove you from her circle like right now!”

  I agreed, but didn’t say a word. Keith responded though. “I’ve had a wealth of experience, and you would hurt yourself trying to teach an old dog new tricks. Evelyn is just talking shit right now. We both know that a move like that would not be in our best interest.”

  “Speak for yourself,” Evelyn said. “I know what’s in my best interest. It’s just a matter of time before you figure out what’s in yours.”

  Jada added her two-cents, again. “Well, figure it out some other time, because I want to hear what the prez gotta say, if he don’t mind saying it.”

  He placed his hands behind his head, clenching them together. “I . . . I can’t really pinpoint who it was, but if I—”

  Jada interrupted. “Dang, you been laying pipe to that many women where you can’t pinpoint one? That ain’t good, Mr. President. Not good at all.”

  We laughed because I was thinking the same thing. He quickly cleared up what he was trying to say.

  “I was saying, if I could decide between two people, it would have to be when I was fifteen. It was my first time, and I thought I was so in love with a chick named Teri Bufford. She was fine as ever, and we had sex while her parents were away on vacation. Even though I didn’t know what the hell I was doing, she made me feel like our moment together was real special. Today, she’s a doctor and she’s married to one of my frat brothers from college.”