FALLING: The Negative Ion Series

by Ryanne Anthony

  “Hey, stranger. How have you been?”

  “Good,” I smiled. “You?”

  “Good,” Roland nodded. “That hair color looks beautiful on you, you know. Good choice.”

  “Thank you,” I blush.

  “But I’m still disappointed. Even more so after seeing you tonight. I was hoping to get a second kiss from a certain girl but she hooked up with my best friend’s brother-in-law. Can’t tell you how much that blew.”

  I smile shyly. “You were taken, Roland. That kiss was wrong of us. Good, but wrong.”

  “It was more than good, Itsy. It was the best I’ve ever had.”

  “Me too. To that point.”

  “Still with Malloy?”

  I smile. “I am. Happily.”

  “Glad to hear it,” Roland nods then leans to whisper in my ear. “The girl I was with dumped me when she found out about our kiss.”

  I shoot my head up and frowned. “How did she find out?”

  “I told her,” he shrugs.

  “But why?”

  “It wasn’t working anyway. I couldn’t get you or that kiss off my mind. She knew I was distancing and I told her to escalate that.”

  My nose scrunched and I looked at him. “Do I have to watch my back now?”

  “No,” he laughed. “She has no clue it was you.”

  “Good,” I breathed out. “I’m sorry about her.”

  “I’m not. I’m only sorry I didn’t get my chance with you.”

  “And you still won’t, Sampson. Back away.”

  I shake my head at the force in Jaxen’s voice and turn to confront him.

  “What is your problem, Jaxen?”

  “Nothing. I need to talk to you.”

  “Well, I’m not in the mood to talk to you now,” I hiss and walk away, going straight to the outside door. I knew he would follow me so it was no surprise when he grabbed my arm on the sidewalk just outside the property.

  “I said I needed to talk to you, Kimber.”

  “And I said not now, Jaxen. Go away and sober up. I can smell the alcohol on you a mile away.”

  “I needed a drink. Fucking sue me!”

  “What the hell is your problem?”

  “You!” Jaxen shouted and walked away, mumbling something about never again or something. I turned and walked home, locking myself in my apartment and ignoring my phone. I finally shut it off after I sent Mom a text, telling her I was home, exhausted and was going to rest. I fell asleep and woke up around 12 that night, starving. I went to the kitchen and saw my Dad sitting in the kitchen eating a huge piece chocolate cake the housekeeper made. I swear that woman, Heidi, was Betty Crocker and Mrs. Garrett rolled into one.

  I smiled and hugged him at the waist. “Hi, Daddy. When did you get back?”

  “Ten minutes ago,” Daddy grinned with a mouth full of cake, he swallowed what he had in his mouth then kissed my temple and took another bite. “This is good.”

  “Heidi made it.”

  “Heidi?”

  “Our new cook/housekeeper,” I say as I peer in the fridge. I decide on a sandwich. “She’s amazing and doesn’t let Mom do a thing.”

  “Good. Your Mom deserves to be pampered. I caved with her, honey.”

  “Caved?”

  “Yeah,” Daddy nodded. “She’s keeping her job as Captain.”

  “What? Is that safe in her condition?”

  “She’s mostly on desk detail and will be restricted to that until she can’t work anymore then she’s taking off for a year. After that, it’s back to work.”

  I shake my head. “Are you sure you’re okay with that?”

  “As long as she’s not patrolling or answering to radio calls, I believe I can handle it. Don’t tell her, but I’m hoping when the babies come, she will change her mind and retire. She said something about becoming mayor here. I can definitely live with that.”

  “So can I,” I laugh. “Much less worry.”

  I finish making my sandwich and take a bite.

  “Make me one of those, honey,” Daddy says he puts his plate in the dishwasher. I make him a sandwich and we sit at the table after I put everything back where it belongs.

  “So you don’t need to go back to the east coast?”

  “No,” Dad murmurs after he swallows a bite. “Your grandparents have packed up and there’s a truck moving across the country with the things they kept, the rest they donated. They flew in with me and are living it up in a hotel until their condo is ready.”

  “Hotel? Why are they in a hotel?”

  “They said they didn’t want to intrude. I told them it was non-sense but they insisted. You know how they get when their mind is set.”

  “Yeah, I do,” I giggle. “They are a lot like you and Parker.”

  “And you, honey.”

  “Not me. I’m never stubborn.”

  Daddy reached out and tweaked my nose and I giggled again then sighed.

  “You look worried, honey. Is something wrong?

  “Mom told you about the scholarship?”

  “Ah. Yes, she did.”

  I put my sandwich down and grab two waters. “And?” I ask, not looking at him.

  “I agree with your mother, honey.”

  “I don’t need connections, Daddy. I have a dad who has a law firm and he’s promised me there is a position with him when I graduate.”

  “True and that always stands but the W.I.L.L. can get you further and faster than I can. They will look good on your resume.”

  “I don’t need it, Daddy. They can let someone have the scholarship that needs it. Unless you don’t want to pay to further my education anymore.”

  “Of course I will. It would be my pleasure. I just don’t want you to regret sticking with my firm later.”

  “I won’t, Daddy. I promise.”

  “I hope so, honey. All right, so who’s getting my checks, Stanford or Berkeley?”

  “I haven’t heard from either yet, Daddy. I guess I didn’t get into either.”

  “Well, you could still do the internship with my firm for a year and reapply. That offer is still on the table.”

  “Okay,” I smile. “I was really looking forward to it.”

  “That’s settled. You’re hired and you start the first week in September, so enjoy yourself now.”

  “Thanks, Daddy,” I yawn. “The last few days have been exhausting. Mom’s been crashing earlier and earlier.”

  “She’s been well otherwise?”

  “She has,” I nod. “Other than missing you.”

  “I missed her, too.”

  I smile. “Then finish your sandwich and go to her. You may be able to wake her.”

  “I will definitely try,” Daddy smiles then stands. “Your hair, honey. I love it. It’s different and so you. You should have been born with black hair. Whose idea was this?”

  “Mine,” I grin. “You really like it?”

  “I do. It’s great on you.” Daddy kisses my temple again and goes to the stairs. I quickly clean up then go back to my apartment and turn on my phone. It chimes immediately, alerting me to an incoming text from Jaxen.

  Still CN U 2mrw?

  I smirk at the text then sigh. I better get this over with.

  Yeah. Same time?

  Galaxy Music parking lot. 11. C U then. Good night.

  Good night.

  It felt forced and clinical. I think this is not good at all and I really do not want to see him. I place my hand over my womb and know that I have to, for his or her sake.

  Chapter 13

  Black… a week to go

  I arrived in the parking lot early, determined to find out what was wrong with Jaxen. As I sat in the car, I felt strange and had a feeling I shouldn’t be there. I had an overwhelming sense of dread. Finally, I saw the band’s van pull up. The other four members, after an initial glance in my direction, turned away and disappeared into the music store. They didn’t wave, smile or acknowledge me. Not good.

  Finally, Jaxen jum
ped out and walked toward me. I got out the car and met him halfway.

  “Jaxen, I have a couple things I need to tell you.”

  “Save it, Kimber,” Jaxen smirked. “There’s nothing left for us to talk about.”

  “What?” I gasped.

  “We’re done.”

  My ears started ringing and my stomach was flipping around to the beat of my rapid heart. “WHAT?!”

  “This isn’t working out for me anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I had some fun but now I’m… I’m just bored. I need to move on. Surely you know that I need to keep the rotation going.”

  “Rotation?” I blink. What?

  “Yeah. You’ve been occupying all my time. My other bitches are complaining and I am so sick of hearing it. Everyone wants a turn and they have a point: you’ve been occupying a lot of my time lately.”

  My throat burned and I tried to swallow the pain that was burning like fire. No… no… this was not happening, I thought as I grip my hair.

  “Okay, wait… let’s just breathe and--,” I said and reached out and gripped the sides of Jaxen’s shirt, trying to pull him closer.

  “Wait for what, Kimber? I thought I was being clear. What is it you’re not understanding?” Jaxen asked with an impatient sigh as he tugged my hands away. “Seriously. What the fuck don’t you get?”

  The tears couldn’t be checked anymore. Jaxen, the guy he was before we got together, was back. The changing was no longer happening. He was back to being the uncaring asshole I knew and stupidly wanted to be with. Love? No, not this guy. Still… I found myself begging him.

  “You don’t love me anymore? Did I do something? Tell me, Red. Tell me so I can change into what you want! Please… just don’t… don’t do this to us! I love you!”

  Jaxen sighed again and looked away from me, looking thoughtful but determined. My heart fluttered as I waited for his next words.

  “I don’t do love. You knew that in the beginning because among other things, Samantha repeatedly warned you. Well, I love things… my beer. My weed… giving tats… and riding my bike. I like banging on my drums and having a different bitch suck me off after every show or in my tat cubicle. Since I’ve been fucking around with you, that hasn’t happened. I miss it and I want it all back and I can’t have it if you’re sitting around at every measly gig I get, every tat I give, scaring off potential fuck buddies!”

  What the fuck is this? He loved me! He said it! He cried in my arms, begging not to give up on us and stay with him. I did and, against my better judgment, I caved and agreed to stick with him. Love him.

  As I tried to form the words, Jaxen lowered his stance and caught and held my gaze, his hazel eyes boring deep into mine.

  “Are you getting it now, Kimber? I don’t want to be with you anymore. I got what I wanted and now I’m bored. I’ve already changed my cell number and I promise you’ll never get my new number.”

  “Ready, baby?” A woman cooed to his left, her hand rubbing his chest as she frowned at me. I blinked as I looked in the woman’s face and gasped.

  “Camille Hogan?” I croaked. “You’re back with her? That’s the type of woman you want?”

  “I’m not with anyone,” Jaxen smirked. “I want pussy. Pussy that will fuck me and do it right. I don’t have time to teach you how to do that.” He turned to look at Camille with the dirtiest grin I’d ever seen. “I bet you’d drop to your knees and blow me in this parking lot right now, wouldn’t you?”

  “Mmm… you know it, baby,” Camille purred back, her hand rubbing his erection through his jeans. Slowly she reached inside and gripped him. “I’m ready right now,” Camille purred again, biting at his jaw.

  My heart stopped beating. In front of me? NO! NO! NO!

  “We have a gig tonight, let’s not get me arrested. I’ve got the band’s van and you can take care of me in there. Go get naked and I’ll be along in a minute,” Jaxen grinned, chirping the remote on the black van with Negative Ion scrawled in white letters on the side.

  Camille kissed him full on the mouth and he swatted her ass as she hurried to the van. I involuntarily took a step back and my mouth went dry and I finally realized that my jaw went south of my face. This was real. Jaxen and I were really over.

  “I trusted you. You… said… you,” I gasped. “You said you loved me!”

  “I say what I have to in order to get what I want and get needs met. Hey, we all have to sacrifice once or twice, right?” Jaxen shrugged. “I’d never been with a virgin before. I got curious. Sue me. Look, I have to go. I hate to keep my dick waiting. Good luck in Cambridge and have a safe flight when you leave.”

  Anger roiled inside me. I felt hurt, confused, baffled and tortured. How could he? He wanted my virginity so bad that he had to lie and make me fall in love with him to give it to him? What type of shit is that? God, I am so stupid! I reached out and with as much might I could, I slapped him. It felt good, but nowhere near enough.

  “FUCK YOU!” I shouted in a choked cry then, blinded by tears, ran to the car. I got inside and shook as I tried to start it. I finally gave up and beat the steering wheel before collapsing on it and crying uncontrollably.

  How could I have been so stupid? I fell for the oldest trick in the book, the same one Mom fell for. I sobbed again at the thought of Mom. Shauna Marie Kessler would not like what I would have to tell her, but I need her now more than ever. I have so much to consider and I have no idea where to start, let alone what to do.

  “I’m pregnant, Red,” I sobbed in my hands. “I’m pregnant. Don’t make me do this alone!”

  I don’t know how long I sat there when a knock sounded on the passenger door. I startled, and knowing I must look a complete disaster, I looked up and jumped at the person glaring in.

  “Unlock the door, Itsy.”

  I shook my head and sniffed hard. I peeked up and saw the band’s van was gone and wondered why and how he was still here.

  “Come on, let me in!”

  “Go away, Stanley!” I shouted. “I have nothing to say to anyone in your band ever again.” I then raised my shirt and unscrewed the belly ring. I rolled down the window enough to toss the damn thing out the window and took off. I wanted to get drunk. Nasty, filthy, dirty, disgusting drunk. I even pulled into the lot at a liquor store and as I was about to get out of the car, I remembered the baby. I threw my head back and sighed. I would have to suffer this turmoil sober.

  I started the car again and went home. Silently, I went inside and heard conversation coming from the downstairs room Daddy claimed as his office. I walk over and leaned against the door jamb, watching Mom sitting on Daddy’s lap as he rubbed her ever-expanding belly. That’s going to be me soon. The expanding belly but without the loving man to support me.

  “But, sweetie, I like Samuel and Samona. What’s wrong with it?”

  “Kitten, Samuel III? Don’t you think that’s a little much?”

  “No, I don’t. Samona Amelia Forrest and Samuel Ashton Forrest III. There, done. Easy as A-B-C,” Mom giggled.

  “I like those, Kitten.”

  “So do I,” I murmur.

  “Good! Then we’re all agreed,” Mom laughed as she looked up. “I’m so glad it’s unanimous. Itsy--”

  Mom jumped off daddy’s lap and rushed over to me. Daddy stood immediately and followed her, each standing on my sides. I enclosed my arms around my father and cried into his chest as Mom gently rubbed my head and Daddy rubbed my back.

  “What’s wrong, honey? What happened? Are you hurt? Bleeding? Were you in an accident?”

  “No, Mom,” I sniff. “I need to talk to you and Daddy. Right away.”

  Daddy walked me into the office and sat with me on a couch as Mom closed the door then poured a glass of water. I gratefully drank it even though I tasted my tears more than I did that water.

  “Mom, do you still have that letter for my scholarship?”

  “Yes, I do. I believe it’s in the file cabinet, honey. Why? Are you thinking of accepting it?”
/>
  I nod, another tear falls. “I have to go away.”

  Daddy tightens his arms around me. “Why, honey?”

  “Jaxen dumped me,” I wailed. “He dumped me because he missed his old life and I was standing in the way of him and fun. He did lie to me! He said he loved me and he got me to love him and I-I-I… I gave him me! I gave him my virginity because I thought he loved me as much as I loved him!”

  “Oh, honey,” Mom cried as she held me.

  “What’s this fucker’s address? I’m going to kill him!”

  “Sam, no! I can do it legally!”

  “You can’t do it legally, Kitten! I need to do this! That bastard hurt my baby girl and I need to string him by the balls!”

  “No, Daddy! Neither of you will hurt him. I’ll get over him in time but in order to start, I need to go away. I can’t stay here with him in the same town and get over him. It hurts too badly.”

  “Honey,” Mom said. “If you go to Harvard, we won’t be there. You cannot go alone. I won’t be able to rest if you do. Please, reconsider.”

  I sniff. “I won’t be alone for long, Mom.”

  “Who’s going with you?” Daddy frowned.

  “My baby.”

  Chapter 14

  Sigh

  Not a good time.

  I’m gutted and the morning sickness is kicking my fucking ass.

  School starts in a week and I hate it here.

  I’m sad.

  Pitiful.

  Lonely.

  So, so tired.

  And I miss him more every day.

  Try me next chapter.

  Go away.

  Sorry.

  Go away, please.

  Chapter 15

  And breathe… Just Breathe

  “Ms. Forrest, you’re late.”

  “Sorry, Professor Charles,” I puff. “I had a tough time getting up the stairs.”

  My Civil Procedure professor eyes my huge belly with a smirk. “I bet you did. Come and sit. Let’s talk.”

  I wobbled over and drop in a chair in front of his desk. I am almost done. A few precious weeks left, and I will be a mother. I can hardly wait to get my body back and kiss my son all over his little face.