The sound of an ignition starting pulls me away from her, to the loud engine behind us. As soon as my eyes fall on the source, I feel the ice fill my veins. I’m torn between wanting to cross the parking lot and lay him out and wanting to wrap my arm around Halle and get her out of here.
I’m kicking myself for letting her walk out here by herself. My mind drifts back to the conversation I had earlier this week, the information that had come in from an informant about how they had spotted Krate in the parking lot of Brodie’s.
Seeing the black GTO parked behind her, I stand to full height not shying away from the coward who I know is behind the wheel. Whatever happened has everything to do with me and this bastard.
All I see is red. I want nothing more than to pull him out of the car and rip him to shreds. The lights flash in front of my eyes, as he puts the car into reverse and slowly backs out of the parking spot.
As the car turns, pulling out, his eyes meet mine.
“Oh, God,” Halle mutters to herself. “Graham, stop! Don’t go,” she cries, reading my mind.
Flexing my jaw, I stare him down, sending a message to him not to fuck with me, but the smile that lines his mouth has me curling my hand into a fist as he hits the gas and peels out of the parking lot. When his car turns the corner, pulling out of the lot, I’m next to Halle in an instant.
“C’mon, I’m going to give you a ride home. You can tell me what happened in the car. I want to make sure you get home safe. I’ll have Maverick come by tomorrow and drive your car to the salon.”
Holding my hand out to her, she puts hers in mine as I help her out of the car. I don’t move to let go until we approach my pickup and I help her into the cab.
We drive in silence the two minutes it takes to get to her place. Pulling up alongside of her apartment building, I put the gear in park and roll my head to the side to glance over at Halle.
“Tell me what happened, Hals.”
The light from the dashboard casts a soft glow on her face, giving me just enough to see the sweet curve of her smile. I know she likes hearing me call her by the same nickname I had for her all those years ago.
“It was nothing at first. He was just hitting on me, acting like he wanted to take me home. But then he.” She pauses, glancing back over at me. “He asked where you were. Said he couldn’t believe you let me out of your sight long enough for him to talk to me.”
My grip on the steering wheel tightens.
“Has he pulled this shit before?”
The anger is rising in my voice, taking her off guard. Normally I can keep my temper in check. I’m not usually one to fly off the handle like this, especially not around her.
Something about knowing this skeevy fucker is trying to get close to my Halle pisses me off.
Her eyes narrow at me as she lets out a heavy sigh. She doesn’t know what I know though. She doesn’t realize how tangled up into my past, into what happened to Gage, we believe he is. I can’t tell her, at least not yet, but dammit I want to. I want her to know so she understands and so she’ll stay the fuck away from him.
“Listen, Graham,” she says, but I hold my hand up stopping her.
“Don’t go there with me, Halle. This isn’t one of those topics you can fire back at me about how I don’t need to worry about you and you can do whatever the hell you want. Not about this, not with you. Whether you like it or not, I’m gonna worry about you. If it’s you, it is my damn business. Let me make this clear, we will not be goin’ there. Not ever.”
Halle lets out a heavy sigh, as she crosses her arms over her stomach. I watch as she runs her finger over her thumbnail, before she glances up meeting my eyes.
“I’m going to ask you again, Halle; has he tried to pull this shit before?”
She presses her lips into a thin line, contemplating, before she finally answers.
“No, he hasn’t. I don’t know why, but I have a feeling he was only doing it because of you.”
She doesn’t know why but hearing her say it I know she’s not wrong.
“Why do you say that?”
“I saw him poking around your truck before I got outside. I think I caught him off guard when he saw me coming.” Her eyebrows furrow as she looks at me. “I’m not sure what he would be looking for. You’ve never been one to keep your vehicles very clean.”
She looks down at the floor, kicking her foot at the sweatshirt and empty bottle of motor oil sitting on the floor. I’ve been meaning to throw it away, I just haven’t got around to it.
“Just do me a favor, Hals. Please just stay away from Krate and any of the scumbags he runs around with, alright? They’re not good people, and I don’t trust them,” I say, lowering my voice. I know she can hear the worry in my voice as she peers up at me.
She’s trying to get a read on me, figure out what I’m not telling her but doesn’t fight me for more answers. I’m grateful as hell for it too. I don’t want to lie to her, but now isn’t the time that I fill her in on this. Not yet anyway.
“Okay,” she says. Very rarely does she give into me without pushing.
“You may not believe me. I certainly don’t deserve your trust anymore, but I don’t know what I’d do if anything ever happened to you.”
My mind filters back to the night Gage died, the panic that consumed me. Picturing being in that moment but with Halle on the other end, I just can’t.
Resting my chin on my closed fist, I glance out the window at the street light in the alley behind her apartment building. The light is about to go out, so it flashes every few seconds. I let it distract me from the darkness of my thoughts.
“I do,” she whispers, catching me off guard. My eyebrows furrow and for a second, I’m unsure of what she’s talking about, but then my comment comes back to me. Hearing her tell me, even after everything happened and the pain I put her through, she still trusts me carries a lot of weight.
Her hand reaches across the center console and brushes against my bicep. My arm flexes under her touch. I can feel the warmth of the contact radiating down my arm and throughout my body. Only she has ever been able to make me feel this way. Seeing her, touching her tonight for the first time in years, it makes me wonder what I was thinking letting her go and leaving her behind.
I have thought about her every day for the past five years. When I first left, she would call or text me almost every day. For the longest time, I would sit and replay the voice mails she would leave, just using the sound of her voice as a connection to the loss I felt aching in my stomach. I saved her text messages and would re-read them when I was thinking about her, regretting my decision to leave. I left her with nothing but a goodbye, yet I used her words telling me she missed me to get through every day.
It made me feel incredibly selfish but giving her the same in return would’ve only been to ease the guilt I felt inside. It wasn’t going to help her move on, so every time I thought about responding back, I closed the message and turned off my phone.
When the messages stopped, I told myself I had lost her. She had let me go and I deserved to lose her. I hurt her in unmeasurable ways and I didn’t deserve the way she continued to put herself out there, not wanting to let me go. I thought she had and maybe I still have lost her, but hearing her say she still trusts me, even when I know I don’t deserve it, means more to me than I could ever put into words.
Reaching up, my hand folds over hers. Holding her small hand out in front of me, I press a soft kiss against the palm of her hand. I hear her breath hitch, not expecting the move, but I don’t let it stop me as I kiss down her palm to her wrist as her hand presses against my cheek.
For a moment, I close my eyes and soak in the feeling of her hand again in the same way I held onto her words. We sit like this for a few minutes. No sound, no words. Just the peace of having her next to me again filling the silence between us.
When I finally work up the courage to open my eyes, I’m surprised when I see the tears filling the brim of her eye.
&nb
sp; “Halle,” I say, turning in my seat to face her. I hate seeing her cry. It physically pains me to see her anything but happy.
“No, it’s okay.” She waves me off, as she runs her finger underneath the edge of her eye, avoiding eye contact with me.
“I should head inside. It’s been a long day and I’m exhausted,” she says, looking back at me. She puts a smile on, but I know better than to believe it. It doesn’t meet her eyes and I know she’s just forcing it, doing her best to fight off the urge to show any emotions.
I want to push her on it. I want to beg her to stay here, with me. I want to change the subject and promise her it will be different, but I can also see the fatigue in her eyes. The exhaustion that’s weighing on her, so I decide against it.
It’s not the time or place. I don’t deserve for her to give me a second more of her time, even if I’m a selfish, greedy bastard who wants to soak up her sun and bask in it.
“Alright,” I say, sitting forward to turn off the ignition.
“You don’t have to get out. I can see myself inside. Thank you for the ride and making sure I was okay.”
“Of course,” I say, reluctantly.
The edge of her mouth curves into a small smile as she reaches forward to grab her purse, pulling the keys out and clutches them in her hand.
She mutters out a soft “goodnight” as she slips out of the passenger seat and shuts the door behind her. As soon as she’s gone, I feel like all the air is sucked out of me and I’m left feeling deflated.
I watch her toned legs eat up the distance, taking her further away from me. My eyes don’t leave her as she climbs up the stairs. She turns back to see if I’m still here and when she spots me watching her, she raises her hand in a small wave before sticking the key in her door and disappearing inside.
It hits me how much things have changed between us over the years. I hate how different this feels. This isn’t who we are, how things were supposed to be. Regardless, I know there is no one to blame for this but myself.
Turning the key in the ignition, I shift the gear into drive and head for home. I force myself to remember why I made the decisions I have, and, in the end, I know Halle is better off without me.
For those few minutes though, I let myself wish it were different.
Nine
Halle
Clicking the turn signal, I pull onto the gravel road that winds down to Callum and Ellie’s house. Wes got an RV for us to drive to Chicago where we’ll spend the weekend celebrating their upcoming wedding.
I’ve spent the last two weeks thinking about this trip. On one hand, I’m thrilled to spend the weekend with my friends, but then on the other, I’ve been lost in thought about what it will be like to be in Chicago. In the city Graham escaped to when life got to be too tough.
When he gave up on us and decided I wasn’t worth it anymore.
Callum and Ellie originally met when they were boarding a bus, traveling back home from Chicago. Callum had spent the weekend visiting his brother, Mason, and was coming back home to Arbor Creek.
Ellie grew up living in a small town, Garwood, outside of Chicago. Ellie didn’t have it easy. She boarded a bus, moving to Arbor Creek, and moved into a house Kinsley’s grandfather was renting out at the time. We’ve heard the story countless times of how she was boarding the bus and fell into Callum. He loves to talk about how he swept her off her feet.
Pulling up in front of their house, their driveway is bustling with people. Mason and Brea are here, unloading his truck with their bags. Brannon and Dean are standing in the front yard, laughing about something. I hadn’t expected to see Dean here, considering he lives in Chicago, but he must’ve been visiting.
Parking next to Mason, I check my appearance in the rearview mirror. I was fully expecting to see Graham here, but by the looks of things, he’s not here. There’s a small knot in my stomach forming at the thought of him not coming this weekend.
That thought is quickly pushed out of my mind when I hear the deep rumble of a pickup truck pull up beside me.
Glancing over, my heart starts to come back to life as I take in the profile of his handsome face. He’s wearing aviator sunglasses and a black fitted T-shirt.
“Damn it,” I mutter to myself.
I’ve gone to war in my head over the thought of going to Chicago. I hate everything about big cities and the thought of going here leaves me frustrated. Looking at him and how delicious he looks, I am even more frustrated. Not just the sexual kind.
“You can do this, Halle. You have a plan and you’re going to execute it to perfection.”
Turning back to the rearview mirror, I untwist the cap to my lip gloss and expertly apply the shimmer over my lips before rubbing them together. Fixing a few strands of my hair, I slide the lip gloss back into my purse and push open the door.
The last two times Graham and I have been around each other, I could tell how hard it is for him to stay away from me. There’s a familiarity there between us. Even though he’s fighting against it, I can see he’s struggling to keep his distance.
The plan for this weekend is to remind him of what he let go of when he left me. I want to drive him so crazy he lets go of the control he’s been holding onto and gives into what I know he’s been missing.
As soon as I step out of the car, I spot Brea over the hood of my car. Her long brown hair is wrapped in a messy bun sitting on the top of her head. Her eyes always stand out like crystals with her long eyelashes.
I pop the trunk and begin pulling out my suitcase.
“You need any help?” Brea asks, her voice full of excitement.
Once she’s standing close enough to me, her voice drops down low enough so only I can hear her. “You’re doing it, aren’t you? Hals, you’re dressed to fucking kill right now. When he sees your legs, he’s going to be falling all over himself.”
Brea chuckles, her laughs start carrying on. “I can just picture him now. Oh, God, this is going to be good.”
“You’re damn fucking right I’m doing it.” I smile, wiggling my eyebrows up and down. “He thought he could come back to town lookin’ like a fucking snack and thought I wasn’t going to want some. Try again. I’m not going to be the one to give in though. Nope,” I say with the pop. “Not happening. He walked away and gave up on me. It’ll be him who will be crawling back to me, not the other way around.”
“Damn straight.” Brea laughs.
The sound of honking behind us has us both turning our heads over our shoulders to see who it is, when we spot Wes pulling up the driveaway. Kinsley is sitting next to him, hitting the horn as she waves enthusiastically.
“She lives for this, doesn’t she?”
“Oh, God, yes!” I giggle.
Hoisting my suitcase out of my trunk, I set it on the ground as I see Graham and his large frame out of my peripheral. My knees get a little weak just being near him, but I force myself to get it together.
Giving in, I glance over at him, and I feel like I could come on the spot at the way his arm flexes holding his gym bag in his hand. Rubbing my lips together again, I drink in his tan skin over his broad chest to his handsome face. His light brown hair almost looks underneath the sunlight.
I hate that he’s wearing sunglasses. I wish I could read the look on his face when he sees me.
“Hey,” he croaks.
Hearing the crack in his voice causes sweat to break out over my skin. It’s already warm outside, with the humidity the weatherman said it would get close to ninety degrees today. The heat I feel rushing through me isn’t just from the warm temperatures, but everything to do with having his eyes on me once again.
“Here we go again.” Brea giggles from behind me, causing a grin to spread out over my face.
“Hey, Graham.” I smile.
His eyes rake over my body, before meeting my eyes. I swear for a minute I hear him mutter “shit,” but I can’t be sure if it was him or a voice in the distance.
“Want me to help you with
that?” he asks, pointing to my suitcase, sounding more confident this time.
Looking down at my suitcase and back up to him, I tell him thank you as he steps closer to me. He smells so good and it reminds me how hard having him around this weekend is going to be.
He smells clean, like fresh linen, and something else that’s uniquely Graham. It’s hypnotizing and arousing, all at the same time.
“It’s good to see you, sunshine. You look good.”
The mention of my nickname causes my heart to drop. I force a smile on my face to hide the way it hits me hearing him call me sunshine again.
I want so badly to wrap my arms around him and melt into his body, the way I always would when he called me his sunshine.
“You do too,” I mutter. “You happy to be going back to Chicago?”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, I realize how nervous I am to hear the answer. I almost wish I could press rewind and take it all back.
Lifting his arm, he runs his hand through his hair looking somewhere behind me, before he looks back down at me.
“Not as happy as I am to be home.”
The way he says home eases some of the restraints I had around my heart, making it easier to breathe easier again.
“Good.” I smile. “We’re glad to have you home.”
We’re loaded up and on the road by ten in the morning. The RV Wes was able to get for us is beautiful. It has so much room, which is good considering we have five guys and four girls along for the trip, we need it. We have a long drive ahead of us, so I park it at the table with the girls. The guys took over the living area, watching ESPN highlights on the TV.
“Are you guys going to tell me what we have planned for tonight?” Ellie asks, her eyes bouncing to each of us for any sign of who’s going to spill it.
Ellie’s the most low-key out of all of us. She’s not much of a partier, so I’m sure she’s wondering what the heck we have in store for her when we get there.
The truth is, I don’t have the slightest idea what Kinsley has up her sleeve. She’s been tight-lipped about everything.
Until I Found You: A Second Chance Standalone Romance (Heart's Compass Book 3) Page 6
