French Kiss (Novella)

by Duncan, Abbie

  Maria leant forward, admiring it.

  “Yes, but I’ll bet you could buy a house for the same amount!”

  Cameron shook his head.

  “No, not really. I have a house and it costs much more,” he said, offering a reassuring wink.

  “Yes, but look at the price of ‘that’ one, she said pointing to the ring Cameron had been staring at earlier. Amazingly beautiful, but that price ...”

  “Want to try it on?” Cameron asked casually.

  Maria turned to him, “No, no, I’m not really into jewelry and rings anyway, Cameron.”

  Cameron smiled broadly again, knowing all too well what she really meant.

  “Well ... shall we go then?” he said, looking at the door and then back at her.

  “Yes, sounds like a good idea.”

  The last thing she wanted was for Cameron to lavish her with jewelry and gifts, on his own, he was more than enough for her. Still... she thought, those rings were gorgeous, the likes of which she would never have expected to see on her finger.

  Outside, in the street, Cameron turned to her once more, now his face had turned serious.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to try that ring on?”

  “Cameron, please ...”

  “What about ‘this’ one?” he said, producing a red velvet box from his pocket and holding it out in front of him with a little shrug.

  Maria was speechless. “What ... Cameron?”

  Cameron laughed gently as Maria lost her composure completely, pleased that he had managed to surprise her in just the right way.

  When he had visited the store earlier to buy the very same ring that Maria had been staring at in the shop, he hadn’t been sure how to present it to her. Luckily, there had been one other girl in his life, years earlier and he had pulled the same stunt with her. Taken her to the store and then watched her as she struggled to hide her disappointment when they left without buying something, only to pull out a ring from his coat and surprise her. Back then, the ring didn’t have the desired effect, at least not for as long as he had hoped.

  She hadn’t been willing to wait for the wedding. In fact, he realized, she had no intention of marrying him from the start.

  Not that he thought for one moment that Maria would marry him, at least ... not yet anyway.

  With a gasp, Maria stepped back in disbelief.

  Cameron laughed and cut her off, “Come on, you haven’t figured it out yet?”

  He said raising his hands in a questioning gesture.

  “Figured what out?”

  “The limousine in Rome, the tuxedo ... this ring ... I’m not exactly poor, you know!” Cameron said, raising his eyebrows and stepping forward to take her hand. “Now, come over here and let me see if this fits.”

  Still speechless, Maria stepped forward and allowed Cameron to slide the ring onto her finger - it fit perfectly and the red ruby atop the polished gold matched her nails and hair -- it finished off her look nicely.

  “Wonderful, now you really look the part!”

  Maria held up her hand, marveling at the ring and how it caught the light of the lamp overhead, sparkling like a star in the night sky.

  For so long, she had simply been plain old Maria. No frills. Not even on the same level as your average girl on the street, but at that moment, with Cameron in his tuxedo standing beaming before her while she stared at the enormous ruby on her finger, she felt like a princess.

  More importantly, for the first time in her life - she felt like a woman.

  Her mother had always denied her that, telling her that with her condition she would never be like other women and should simply forget about men altogether.

  And she had, at least most of the time. There had been one forbidden kiss, when she was in her teens, but her mother had heard of it and banished the boy forever, yanking Maria away from him as if he were a danger to her life.

  She didn’t blame her though. She knew it was because her mother was lonely, having raised Maria alone for 24 years. There had been one or two men. Maria had pretended not to notice, but she knew - she heard and saw things ...

  As a young girl, it had been easy to obey her mother’s wishes and stay away from boys, but as her teens passed by and she became a young woman, the urges were infinitely more difficult to control, especially once she discovered the internet and the wealth of opportunities it offered.

  This time, her mother wouldn’t stand in the way. Cameron was too important to her. Tears swelled in her eyes, and threatened to spill down her cheeks, but she held them back.

  “Thank you, Cameron ... thank you so much!” She reached up and put her arms around him before leaning in and finding his lips with her own. Cameron pulled her in and enfolded her within his strong grip, his lips pressing against her own in answer.

  In a cobbled street in Paris, bathed in lamp-light, the two became one and all at once, their pain and loneliness were masked by joy and a bliss so pure it threatened to overwhelm them completely.

  Chapter Nine

  Maria yawned, stretching her arms out above her head.

  “I’m really getting tired now, Cameron, sorry.”

  “No, that’s okay, it is nearly midnight. I have to sleep myself. Got a long day tomorrow.”

  “Walk me to my apartment?” Maria said, looking up at Cameron, as they walked along, the streets now almost completely deserted.

  Cameron nodded, smiling, “Sounds like a plan to me.”

  At Maria’s apartment, she turned to him, a growing feeling within her. She wanted to invite him in, but she wasn’t sure about it. This was all so new to her and anyway, she had no idea what to do. Did Cameron?

  “Can I come in?” Cameron seemed to sense her thoughts. Seemed to know exactly what she wanted and so dearly wanted to give it to her. If there was anyone she trusted at that moment, it was him. She decided in that split-second, as she gazed down on him from the stone steps leading up to her apartment, it was all so ‘right’ and she knew Cameron felt the same, wanted her as much as she wanted him.

  She opened the door and beckoned for him to follow silently, holding out a hand which he took. Quietly, they made their way upstairs, both knowing what was about to happen next and both unable to quell their urges any longer.

  It was awkward at first, neither of them very experienced, but especially Maria. She let Cameron take the lead; she propelled him onward with breathless words and affirmatives as he gently removed her clothes and guided her hands to his own clothes, needing to be freed of their enclosure.

  Maria could barely control her herself and as Cameron lay her down and began to make love to her, she moved with him, learning from his guidance and experience.

  At times they fumbled and their movements were awkward. Still, it was what they both wanted - what they needed and for the next 30 minutes they partook of each other, whispering words of love.

  When they finally lay still in the darkness, Maria’s head resting on Cameron’s broad, strong chest as they panted from their exertions, Maria spoke.

  “Cameron?” Maria looked up, finding Cameron’s face in the darkness, lit up by the moonlight streaming in through the open window.

  “Yes?”

  “Have you done this before?”

  Cameron laughed gently, “Well, sort of, I guess, only it was nowhere near as good as this time, let’s put it that way.”

  Maria ran her hands along Cameron’s muscular body, enjoying the freedom and the feeling of having a man within her grasp for the first time in her life. There had been one other, but it had never gotten physical, circumstances had made sure of that.

  “What about before? Before your accident? Did you ever have a lover?”

  “Yep, there was one girl, while I was still in college. Emma Willen, she stole my heart right outta my chest, she did. Still hurts now when I think about it,” Cameron said, his voice soft in the darkness as he recalled the memories.

  “Did you ever ... you know ...?” Maria asked, still a
little too shy to say the words, but Cameron knew what she meant.

  “Yeah, we did. We were young, you know… and for us it was a daily occurrence. More like exercise than an act of making love, problem is ... it got so repetitive in the end, she left me and went off with the college wrestling champion. Needless to say, I never saw her again. Dropped out of college with her waster boyfriend and vanished ...”

  Maria, reached up and stroked his face, “I’m sorry, that must have hurt.” Her voice was soft, filled with sympathy.

  Cameron shrugged, “It hurt alright, but you know, you have to move on and right now, here with you, I’m one hundred percent sure I’ve done that.”

  Maria smiled. Before the evening had begun, she was positive that Cameron was a good man, a man that she could potentially date and perhaps even start a relationship with - if he would have her, that is. Laying in the darkness with him, listening to his breathing in her ear, his strong arms enclosing her, keeping her close to his muscular body, she realized that what had developed over the course of the evening was far more than just a relationship - it was a bond, a common understanding.

  Yet another moment of silence descended over the pair and Maria lay back, enjoying it. She was becoming sleepy, her eyes heavy, her body relaxed, more so than it had been in a long time.

  “Cameron?”

  “Yes?” He sounded groggy as if he had nodded off momentarily.

  “I really better go to sleep now, I can barely keep my eyes open and tomorrow morning I have a physical therapy session at 8:30. My therapist says it’s best to start in the morning, as my body responds better to the treatment.”

  Cameron sounded like he was stretching, a long moan emanating from him, before he answered her, sleepily. “Okay, Maria, I’m tired too. Been a long evening, but one of the best of my life!”

  Maria smiled, “Me too.”

  “So where are we going tomorrow?” Cameron asked.

  “Hmmm,” Maria thought for a second. “How about New York?”

  “Good choice! I wonder what made you pick the Big Apple?” Cameron laughed in her ear.

  “Goodnight, Joe Buck!” Maria said, softly.

  “Goodnight, Maria ...”

  Chapter Ten

  Cameron leant back in his high back leather recliner and watched the screen as his computer went through the motions, shutting down slowly. Within a moment or two his room was bathed in silence and semi-darkness. The only light came from a dirty street-light outside his window, but it vanished as he pulled the curtains with one swipe of his strong arm. He was alone with his thoughts.

  Going over the evening spent with Maria in his head, he closed his eyes, the images still fresh in his mind. He smiled. It felt good to be able to smile, with genuine happiness, perhaps for the first time since he’d been discharged from hospital almost 3 years earlier.

  Had it really been so long? He nodded and looked up at the ceiling, recalling his conversation with Maria about God.

  “If you ‘are’ real, thank you...” he said with a sly grin.

  The last three years had been like a dream to him. He barely even remembered the last time he had actually had a conversation with a girl, let alone share an intimate evening with one. Cybersex, or whatever you call it, wasn’t like the real thing, of course… but it was the closest he had come to making love in nearly 4 years.

  The war had engulfed him… consumed his life, his family, everything. In the end, after 3 years of loyal service and 2 trips to Iraq, it had spat him out as a broken man. When he had returned home, wheelchair bound for the rest of his life, he found himself virtually alone. For a time he lived with his mother, but she was quite frail and weak herself. She had tried her best to care for him for the time she had left, but that hadn’t been long.

  She had passed away while Cameron was undergoing therapy at the hospital; it had been his own decision to put himself through such rigorous training. Daily, he would endure torturous routines that pushed his body to the limit, but it was the only way. The only way he and he alone could care for himself, without the aid of a nurse. No matter how much his mother had complained from what was to become her deathbed, he couldn’t be persuaded otherwise.

  Heaving himself up from his position on the recliner, his strong arms rippling with the movement as the muscles he had honed for hours and days on end, responded and served him, he turned to face his bed, rolling his custom built wheelchair across the carpetless floor.

  He had chosen not to decorate his one bedroom apartment. He no longer needed such luxury. Nor was there any kind of decor in his home at all, save for a picture of his mother on his bedside table. A reminder of times gone past. Sometimes looking at the picture would cause him to break down in tears, recalling how things had once been. The pain of loss, not only of his mother but of his friends, but the loss of opportunities. His legs.

  Cameron wheeled himself across the floor to his bed, the covers rolled back and ready for him. His military training still firmly embedded in his psyche meant that everything was prepared and ready long before he thought about retiring each night. He required no nurse to care for him despite his difficulty getting around. He had worked his arms at the hospital until they were so strong he was able to walk on them and a week later dismiss the nurse that had cared for him for months. No longer would he be a burden on the world.

  Taking hold of the harness that hung ready by his bed, he pulled himself up. This was a routine he had done nightly for 2 years. Once he was safely up onto the harness hanging above his bed, he leant down, kissed his mother and smiled.

  Tonight, no tears would fall. For the first time since Iraq, he felt human again. Meeting Maria and spending time with her within Second Life had allowed him to regain some of the confidence he had left behind.

  As he settled into bed, pushing the harness away with one hand, he thought back to the man he had been before Iraq. Normally, such an act would have been difficult but he found that he could now remember, without anguish enveloping him, without the uncontrollable sobs wracking his body as they had so many times before. His pillow would be dry tonight.

  Just 3 years earlier, Cameron had been a 29 year-old soldier, with high expectations of his own life.

  His superiors had always picked him out for great things, if he kept his head down and continued to put in the effort. Iraq was supposed to be the catalyst to greater things for him.

  A promotion? Glory. Experience. Fame and riches in the private sector? Maybe even a career in politics?

  Certainly he would get married upon returning from duty.

  All that potential was taken away from him in the blink of an eye, when his confident nature got the better of him while on patrol.

  Part of that young, ambitious man had returned as the evening with Maria had worn on and in the end, the real Cameron had begun to emerge from hibernation – he could feel within him a spark. He was regaining some of his old zest for life.

  A landmine may have blown his legs and his dreams to kingdom come, but Maria had in the space of a few encounters filled in part of the yawning void within him that had been growing ever larger as time went on.

  Cameron closed his eyes, a smile that he couldn’t wipe away even if he wanted to still lingered as he drifted off into a fitful, undisturbed rest.

  Chapter Eleven

  Maria logged off her computer and sat for a moment, a smile fixed upon her face as she went over the night in her mind once more. She looked up at the clock on her bedroom wall, taking note that it was nearly 1am.

  Her mother would call her soon to see what was taking her so long. If only she didn’t need assistance to get in and out of bed every night, she could enjoy the kind of privacy other 24 year-old girls no doubt enjoyed at home.

  Her mother always reminded her “You are one of the lucky ones, so be grateful, young lady.”

  She was right.

  Although she was born with cerebral palsy, it wasn’t as serious as it might have been. Her arms were okay fo
r the most part with the muscles there already trained and strengthened significantly, meaning she could perform normal things like operate a mouse. She gave thanks for that.

  Her legs were a different matter altogether though, as no matter how much rigorous training and therapy she underwent, they just wouldn’t respond in the way she needed them too. Once, they had.

  She wheeled over to the wardrobe, custom built so that everything hung at waist level for a normal person, but just right for her. She stretched up out of her wheelchair and reached for her favorite nightie, the one that hung just above the knee, a height she was beginning to like.

  Quietly, she slipped off her clothes in the semi darkness of her small bedroom, her haven, a safe corner of the world that had sheltered her since she was a young teen.

  Cameron ... what are you doing now?

  She thought about Cameron as she slipped the nightie over her head, allowing it to glide over her body, a faint sensation that reminded her of Cameron’s gentle touch, against her skin, though she knew she had yet to feel him outside of her own imagination. She supposed that was one of the magical things about Second Life - it showed and revealed only so much, the rest you had to fill in yourself.

  Second Life at one time had been a joke to her.

  “A second life? People are just kidding themselves,” she had once said, a feeling of scorn filling her during an online chat in a forum for other Cerebral Palsy sufferers like herself. They had told her how they now had boyfriends and saw them every night – traveling the world in the virtual reality simulation where geography was no obstacle and creative minds could reproduce anything from the physical world that they wanted. Visit the Titanic? Sure, you can do that! Experience sky diving? Your avatar can.

  She laughed at them back then.

  Now, she herself was a member of Second Life. She had even designed her character in the way she perceived herself, almost 6 feett tall, a round, petite face with a small mouth that was painted with burgundy lipstick, and long hair stretching to her buttocks. All of it was able to be changed at the click of a mouse button if her mood varied.