Her Hidden Pack (House of Wolves and Magic Book 4)

by Helen Scott

  The guys were dragging just like I was, and when we’d all collapsed into the car, I wasn’t surprised that we just sat there a moment before Blake roused himself enough to drive. I’d simply been thankful that Roman had taken a backseat, literally. He’d sat next to me, which was unusual since the man was not only an excellent driver but loved being in control. To see him just throw the car keys into the air for anyone to catch had been more than a little surprising. I’d almost snatched them up, but I hadn’t driven over thirty miles an hour in a long time and I wasn’t sure what we were going to encounter as we made our way to the next motel. Plus, I knew that Roman needed me in that moment, so I plopped down into the backseat and scooted to the middle with Roman on one side and Tate on the other.

  The two of them had each taken a life tonight, and I knew as surely as I knew my own name that they needed comfort, but neither of them would ask for it. All I could do was offer what I had to give.

  I also knew that none of them wanted to talk about what happened, even if I thought it would help. They might eventually, but it was too soon and we all needed time to process.

  Blake’s gaze regularly flicked up into the rearview mirror, looking past me and behind us, and I knew he was checking to see if we were being followed. He caught me watching him at one point, and I silently raised an eyebrow in question. He gave me the smallest shake of his head possible, and I felt relief wash through me. We weren’t being followed. At least that meant we didn’t have another fight incoming, not immediately anyway. It seemed like we were never far away from the fight right now though.

  I tried not to think about that too much, since I knew it would be a downward spiral, but sometimes it was hard not to. We kept being found, kept being hunted, kept getting into fights. At some point, it started to feel like this was going to be never-ending. Eventually, we would need to figure out a way to make some money and get the hell out of the city. Maybe even the state.

  Hell, maybe we could go to Vegas and hustle down there for a bit, win some cash by playing pool and darts. Maybe I could find a mechanic’s gig and we could all crowd into a tiny one-bedroom apartment and slowly fall out of love with one another.

  Ugh.

  Rein it in, Nina.

  Spiraling, it was a dangerous thing. I sighed and tried to focus on the men that were snuggled up against me. Tate’s head rested on my shoulder, which meant that he was contorted at a strange angle since I was so much shorter than him. Meanwhile, Roman’s hand was on my thigh just above my knees, his firm grip making me snuggle into him as much as I could. The two of them had been warriors tonight. Hell, we all had, but they had gone above and beyond. They had done something they could never take back, though I suspected it wasn’t a first kill for either of them. I actually knew it wasn’t for Roman, but I hadn’t been sure with Tate. Now, I felt more sure.

  My men were more than just lovers and mates, they were true fighters, willing to do whatever was necessary to protect our family. I just hoped that they didn’t have any regrets about what happened. I didn’t, about any of it, which made me hopeful that they felt the same, but I couldn’t be sure until they decided to talk about it. I wouldn’t push though.

  At least not tonight.

  We’d been on the road for over two hours as we drove around Jax’s territory. Not that the territory boundaries had ever stopped him before, but it still felt like we should avoid courting trouble if we could, and I was willing to bet that was why Blake had taken the long way around to the motel we were currently pulling into, instead of driving straight through Jax’s official territory to get to it in half the time.

  “I’ll get us a room,” Micah said quietly before pulling on the door handle and swinging it open into the night air with a quiet click.

  This area of the city scented differently, and it made me curious about it. I’d never spent much time over here, or any time really, since I knew it would put me close to my old pack. That had been the last thing I’d wanted at the time, and still was.

  Traffic rushed by, keeping the air around us moving with different scents, which was good for us since it meant it would be harder to track us. I couldn’t help but wonder if that had something to do with why Blake had chosen this place. It was busier than the ones we’d been choosing, but maybe that would actually work in our favor for once. After all, they seemed to be finding us no matter where we went, or at least we were constantly stumbling across one another. Maybe with this area being so densely populated with humans, it would mean less shifters, which would mean a break for us in turn. The only problem was that we were looking for a specific shifter.

  I had to hope that we could have another night of peace though. After all, if no one had physically followed us, then they couldn’t track our scents, so the only way they’d know where we were was if someone told them or they were incredibly lucky. I refused to believe that Jax was that lucky. If I did, then we might never be able to get away from him, and that just wasn’t something I was willing to accept and I knew the guys weren’t either.

  The door to the motel lobby area opened, and Micah stepped out, brandishing two white plastic rectangles that could be nothing other than key cards for the doors. When he slid into the passenger seat once again, we all waited as he gave instructions on where we were going to be staying and where to park. Finally, we were able to unload once again and pile into the room. As soon as we were inside, Roman disappeared into the bathroom and I heard him flip the shower on. I understood the sentiment. Sometimes, the need to feel clean was overwhelming, especially if it was someone else’s blood or bodily fluids that were crusted to your skin.

  Each of the guys took turns showering, and by the time it was my turn, there was only enough lukewarm water left to wash my hair. The rest of the shower after that was cold, but I didn’t mind. All I wanted for the evening was to crawl into bed with them, and as I toweled off and pulled on an oversized T-shirt and a pair of boxers that belonged to one of them, not that I could tell who, I was met with a sense of completeness that surprised me.

  Surely after everything we’d just been through, I should be worried about us being caught, about Jax finding us, about everything going to shit as it was wont to do. And I was. To an extent.

  I was mainly just happy that they were there with me, their scents wrapping me in the feeling of home, even if we were technically homeless. One of these days, that would change and our lives would calm down. I just hoped we didn’t have to wait too long for that to happen.

  As I pushed open the door to the shower area and exited into the main room, I saw that Roman was icing his knuckles and had fallen asleep with the trash bag full of ice resting on his belly over his hand. The steady rise and fall of his chest had me going over and carefully removing the cold bag, which was now mostly liquid. Tate was on the other bed with Micah, and they were both asleep already, while Blake just watched me quietly as though he was waiting for me to freak out. I gave him a small smile as I climbed into bed next to him and Roman. The two of them would have to deal with me being wedged between them, though I knew they probably actually preferred it.

  Blake turned off the lamp next to him that had been lighting the room with a click, and we were swamped in darkness. Because the motel was in such a busy area, I could see everything quite clearly, from the duffle bags that were lining the wall to the sheen of the black TV that sat on the dresser, just like in most of the motels we’d stayed in. The only thing that was different about this one than our last room was that it had a small table and chairs next to the window, along with a luggage rack next to the dresser, the kind of thing fancy people put their bags on to unpack. We didn’t unpack. Ever. At least not when there was a chance we’d need to run at a moment’s notice.

  I looked at Blake, who was still watching me in the darkness, his eyes shining in the dim light that was making its way through the curtains.

  “You okay, love?” he asked as I snuggled next to him, trying not to disturb Roman, who needed his rest bot
h mentally and physically.

  I nodded. “I’m good, just glad to be in bed, glad we’re all together. I was worried it wouldn’t turn out this way today.”

  Blake wrapped an arm around me, so I lifted my head and rested it on his shoulder, allowing him to pull me even closer.

  “Me too, love, me too. We made it though. We’ll find your fifth mate soon, and then we can put all this bullshit behind us,” Blake murmured against my hair.

  I nodded into his chest, unable to contradict him when his voice was so full of hope. I couldn’t help wondering what would happen when I did find my fifth mate. Would Jax really back down? Or was that just wishful thinking? My gut thought it was the latter, while my heart hoped for the former. My heart was an idiot.

  22

  Nina

  Something made me startle awake, but I wasn’t sure what, not at first. I lay completely still and focused on keeping my breathing level. If we’d been found, the last thing I wanted was to alert whomever it was that I was awake and aware of them.

  When the noise came again, it was from a source I didn’t expect.

  Tate.

  A whimper which turned into a growl sounded from him, and I knew he was dreaming. I also knew that whatever it was he was dreaming about wasn’t fun. I’d been there enough times, trapped in memories or distorted memories, or even just my imagination, as my brain tormented me while I was unconscious.

  I slid from the bed, easing myself from under Blake’s arms and off the end of the bed until I could make my way on silent feet toward my troubled mate. When I made it to the side of the bed Tate was on, next to the window, I could see his face clearly in the dim light. It was contorted in pain, enough that my heart beat rapidly in my chest as I wondered if he’d gone to bed with injuries that should have been treated, but as he moved to lay on his back, I couldn’t see anything wrong so I had to assume it was mental distress.

  I knelt by the bed and stroked my fingertips up and down his arm as I softly called his name.

  After a few moments, his eyes fluttered open and his breathing slowed from the gasping breaths of his nightmare to something more regular. I wasn’t sure if he knew I was there or not, at least, not until he turned and looked at me.

  “What’s wrong, Nina?” he asked, his voice rough from sleep.

  “You were having a bad dream,” I said. I wanted to tell him that I knew how he felt in that moment, the relief that it wasn’t real, the horror that your own mind could do something like that to you, but then I wasn’t sure that he had dreams like I did.

  “Sorry I woke you,” he replied as he pushed up into a sitting position.

  “Want to talk about it?” I asked.

  He shook his head, and I knew in that moment that whatever the nightmare had been about had either been something that really happened or something that he was scared of happening.

  “That’s okay,” I said softly as I backed up, giving him room.

  He got up and disappeared into the bathroom for a moment, and I heard the tap run. When he came out, there were beads of water on his face that told me he’d been splashing himself with cold water, probably in an attempt to get rid of the vestiges of the nightmare.

  I stayed where I was, unsure about whether or not Tate would want me around when he came back out, but when he saw me there, he held his arms out to me. I went to him, wrapping my love around him like a blanket, or trying to anyway.

  “What to get some air?” he asked softly as he kissed the top of my head, his breath barely even moving my hair as he spoke.

  “Sure,” I replied, feeling like he was probably the one that needed the air more than I did. I debated putting pants on for a moment, since I was just in a T-shirt and boxers, but the T-shirt was big enough on me to be a dress, so I decided I was fine as I was, at least for a middle of the night outing to the parking lot.

  He swiped a key card from the top of the dresser, and the two of us slipped outside, barely even opening the door wide enough for us to step through. The air outside was cool and fresh, even if it was filled with the scents of the cars and trucks that were driving by along with the city itself. It was less stifling than the room, which I appreciated, and as we walked around the corner of the building and found a small patch of grass, I could scent some squirrels and raccoons that had been running around before we arrived.

  Behind the motel there was an employee parking area with a lonesome beater parked by the back door and a grassy hill that we went and sat on. Immediately, Tate lay back on the hill and looked up at the stars, so I did the same. They were hard to see since there was so much light pollution, but they were there nonetheless.

  We lay in silence for a while and I wanted to ask him what the dream had been about again, but I knew that if he wanted to talk about it, he would. Sometimes talking about things was harder than just processing them on your own. Sometimes the only thing you needed was someone to be with you, to see you sitting in the darkness and join you. If that was what Tate needed in that moment, then that was what I’d do.

  “I didn’t think it would be possible to love you so quickly,” he said in a hushed voice.

  I reached out and grabbed his hand in the dark. Sure, it was more like I fumbled for it, but I got there eventually. “I didn’t think so either, but as it turns out, the mate bond works a lot differently than I’d expected or been taught.”

  He extracted his hand from mine before rolling toward me, propping his head up on the hand that had just been wrapped around my own. As I turned my head toward him, I dragged my gaze from the stars to meet his stare.

  His head bent to mine, and he kissed me so tenderly that it stole my breath. When he pulled away slightly, he said, “Let me pleasure you, Nina.”

  I didn’t know what to say to that, but I didn’t want Tate’s tenderness to feel slighted because I was sleepy, so I just nodded. When his hand slid down my body, I knew exactly what kind of pleasure he was talking about. He pulled the hem of my T-shirt up, and when he found I was only wearing boxers underneath, he let out a rumble of approval.

  He slid his fingers inside and found me ready and waiting for him. “So wet already, and after only a kiss?”

  “What can I say? I crave my mates.” I grinned up at him before pushing up onto my elbows so I could claim his mouth in a kiss of my own.

  He flicked his fingers against my core in response and pulled away. “This was about me pleasuring you, remember?”

  “I take pleasure in your kisses,” I protested.

  He chuckled and chose that moment to swipe the pad of his thumb over my clit a few times before thrusting two fingers into me. I moaned, trying to keep myself quiet and failing as he stroked my clit and my inner walls. His lips caressed my neck, kissing a line from my ear to my collarbone and the neckline of the T-shirt.

  His touches were gentle yet insisting, as though he was trying to give me the softest orgasm of my life. I wasn’t used to it, as most of my lovers were hard and rough, which was the way I liked it so I wasn’t complaining, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t enjoy other things once in a while.

  As we lay there, him touching and kissing me, the scent of the grass in my nose, and the stars winking above, I felt younger than I’d ever really felt as an adult before. I felt like what I imagined a teenager to feel like, all flutters and nerves in my belly, except instead of being unsure about the man I was with, I’d never been more sure about anything. My mates were mine, and they were each perfect for me in their own ways.

  The swirl of Tate’s fingers around my clit had me arching into his hand, seeking more, and he gave it. His speed increased, as did the firmness of his touch, and yet he never pushed for anything more, never tried to remove my T-shirt or panties, didn’t even get between my legs. My orgasm built slowly, but when it broke, it felt like a wave crashing against the shore, finally free of the ocean that was binding it. My whole body shook and shivered under Tate’s ministrations, and when I gasped as another wave crashed against me, my eyes f
lew open and I could swear that stars were dancing in the sky.

  When I came down and my body stopped twitching, I moved to him, my intention to bring him the same pleasure he’d just brought me, but before my hand could connect with his cock, he took it in his own. “You don’t need to do that,” he said softly.

  “And if I want to?” I asked carefully. I didn’t want to cross any boundaries or make him feel like he had to let me do this.

  “What if this was just about you? Me bringing you pleasure? I don’t need that release right now, and my head is a little messed up from my dream still. Can we just lay here and enjoy the night air together?” Tate almost sounded as though he was scared of telling me no, which was something that we would need to talk about when he was in a better headspace.

  For right now though, I just replied with, “We can do whatever you want. No pressure. No expectations. I just need to be clear about one thing though—you never have to pleasure me sexually if you don’t want to. There is nothing in this world that would make me want you to do that against your will, or for you to allow me to pleasure you when you weren’t into it. We can always lie down and look at the stars together. Hell, we don’t even have to look at the stars or lie down. If you just want to sit in a dark room together, we can do that too.”

  “I know, Nina, and I love you so much for saying that.” His words were gentle, and I knew whatever was plaguing him was close to the surface. I had to fight myself not to push, but I knew that he would tell me in his own time. Sometimes things couldn’t just be blurted out, sometimes they had to be prepared for, mental protections put in place, before someone could talk about whatever it was, and I was definitely able to understand that. If Tate wanted to talk, he would, and if he didn’t, he wouldn’t.

  The important thing was he knew I was there for him and that I didn’t require anything of him. As we lay and watched the stars, I tried to map out constellations I’d seen in books or on TV shows about space, but I had no idea where to even start when half the sky was diluted by the city lights. Instead, I curled up against Tate and hoped that my presence was reassuring, just like my mates were for me.