by Lexi Blake
Life had taught her that men couldn’t be counted on. He intended to rewrite that lesson with one of his own.
The night before when he’d dropped her off, he’d walked her to her door and kissed her long and slow. When she offered for him to come in, he’d declined. He wanted it to be special for her. Hell, he wanted it to be special for him.
Grace studied him for a moment. “You’ve been dancing around each other for a year, Eric. How much slower can you possibly take it?”
“We’ve only recently started a relationship though. I think she needs time.”
“And I’m fairly certain what that girl needs is crazy passion that sweeps her away.” Grace looked over the dinner she was about to serve, making sure everything was warm. “Look, I’ve got some experience here. I was determined not to let Sean hook this pretty fish because I didn’t trust that man as far as I could throw him, and that wasn’t far. He was just as muscular back then. He was younger than me. He was hotter than me. I wasn’t about to let that man into my bed much less my life.”
“So what changed?” Deena had her reasons to keep distance between them. All the men in her life had failed her. It was why he’d let the lying thing go. He wouldn’t do it again, but she’d been afraid of him and now he looked at that as a good thing. She would joke and laugh and pal around with most of the other male employees. In the beginning, he’d thought it was because she didn’t like him, and now he realized she liked him too much.
“He walked into my backyard one night, jumped into my pool with his clothes on, and I’ve been his ever since,” Grace said with a wistful smile on her face. “He overwhelmed me. Once he had me in his arms, I couldn’t think about anything but him. All the reasons I couldn’t allow him in kind of fell away and all that mattered was Sean.”
He wasn’t sure Grace and Deena had the same issues. Grace’s husband had died. He hadn’t abandoned her. Still, he understood what Grace was saying. He’d been hesitant to push their relationship past the boundaries of the club because he didn’t want to scare her away. He wanted her trust before he moved them along, but the couples had been encouraged to talk outside of class. And he was different than the other trainees. The only reason he was going through training class was to acquaint himself with the club and how everything worked. If he’d had the money for a membership on his own, he would have applied and given his references and likely been accepted without training. As it was, he was being used more or less as a third instructor. He could start herding her gently toward a relationship outside the club. In a few weeks they would be asked to spend a couple of days under their training Doms’ control as it was.
He nodded to Grace and began to make his way through her spacious home. He’d heard the story about how she and Chef had moved from Fort Worth to be closer to family when Carys was born. He walked through the halls, the walls dotted with pictures of the happy family. Smiling kids and loving couples. It reminded him of his own home in Missouri where his mom and dad had always kept pictures of him and Gwen, every one of their embarrassing school pictures on the wall for all to see.
He wanted that. He wanted the happy home and playful kids, and damn but he wanted that woman as his wife. Smart and sexy. Deena could light up a room when she smiled.
“Hey, did Grace kick you out of the kitchen?” Sean stepped away from the group he’d been talking to and held a hand out to Eric.
He shook Chef’s hand, glancing over where Kyle was looking at his new tablet. “She did, indeed. It looks like he’s happy with his new toy.”
Sean nodded. “I’ve loaded it with every possible way for him to communicate with his mother. I know there will be times when he can’t, but when he can I want him to have every opportunity. Are you looking for your girl?”
“Am I that obvious?”
Sean shrugged. “We’re all that obvious. I saw her in the parlor. Come on. I’ll take you there. I’m afraid she was talking to Charlotte. My sister-in-law loves to think of herself as a good influence on new submissives. She teaches them all the tricks to being a real brat.”
“I was afraid of that.” He followed Sean down the hall and heard Charlotte Taggart talking.
“Oh, I don’t bother to manipulate Ian,” the redhead was saying. “His skull is far too thick. I’ve found direct confrontation is what turns him on.”
Sean stopped before he rounded the corner. From here they could listen but not be seen. “Give it a minute and you’ll understand what you’re up against.”
Yep, eavesdropping wasn’t only for the line chefs. “I don’t know that we should listen in.”
“I have no idea what turns my Dom on,” a familiar voice said. “It doesn’t seem to be me.”
Holy shit. That was Deena’s voice.
Sean leaned in. “So we go in now?”
Bastard. “Not on your life.”
How could she think she didn’t turn him on? He got a hard-on anytime she walked into a room. She sat in his lap most of the time. She had to feel it. He’d worried at first that it might scare her off, but she hadn’t said anything.
“I don’t believe it.” That was Tiffany. He would know her throaty voice anywhere. “That man is into you.”
At least one of them had some sense.
He was very aware that he was standing outside the room like a teenager listening in. It was so far beneath his dignity, but every time he started to go in, Deena said something that stopped him in his tracks.
“If he is, then he has a funny way of showing it.” Deena sounded very offhand, as though she couldn’t care less. “Or maybe that’s simply who he is. I knew it from the moment I met him. He’s one of those guys. You know the type. Upstanding. Moral. Always doing the right thing.”
There was a little laugh and then Charlotte said, “Sounds like a good man. You say it like it’s a bad thing.”
Yeah, he couldn’t see how being upstanding was something to be sneered at.
There was a long sigh and then Deena spoke again. “There’s nothing wrong with it. He’ll make someone a great husband some day. It’s just with that body and that gorgeous face of his, I expected a bad boy. I took one look at that man and thought he could rock my world. Then he opened his mouth and I realized he was a hearts and flowers kind of guy. That would be awesome if I wanted that kind of relationship. I did the hearts and flowers thing. It got me divorced and with a mountain of debt. And zero orgasms. Like none. I’ve gotten better orgasms from a faulty vibrator than I ever got from that man’s dick.”
Sean snorted behind his hand. “Ah, the fairer sex. They’re so genteel when it comes to intimacy. Let me warn you about something, Eric. The subs at Sanctum talk about sex way more than the Doms do.”
He believed it. The Doms would sit around and talk about sports and the best place to find videos of dudes hurting themselves. They would never gossip about their sex lives. They would damn straight not complain that the sub they’d been assigned was too freaking nice to be sexy.
“I think he’s trying to take it slow with you,” Tiffany said, again proving she had more sense than his sub. “I think it’s sweet.”
“I’ve done everything I can to get that man to spank me again.” He could practically see Deena shaking her dark hair.
“Did you try asking him?” Charlotte sounded harsher than before, as though she disapproved of what she’d heard.
There was a long pause. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that, but I’m not sure how to ask a man to spank me. I was acting out and trying to get a reaction from Eric that I’m not going to get. At the end of this six weeks, I’ll let Captain America find his perfect sub and I’ll find my hot, dirty Dom. But I do get what you’re saying. I’m trying to turn him into something he’s not and I’ll apologize to him.”
Oh, yes she would. She would apologize very sweetly once he’d given her every fucking thing she wanted.
Eric nodded back toward the living room before turning on his heels and walking quietly down the hallway. Sean followed. When Eric
was sure they couldn’t be heard, he looked at Sean. “I’m going to need to leave a little early.”
Sean shook his head as he fished around in his pocket. He came up with a key chain and quickly drew off a small gold key. “Nope. I think you handle that shit right here and right now. You mad?”
Angry? Not precisely. “I’m quite calm, but I’m very interested in showing my sub that she’s wrong about a few areas of our relationship. She’s got a safe word. I would never refuse to honor it. I don’t think she’ll use it. I actually think I’m falling into her trap and giving her everything she wants.”
Sean grinned. “Oh, but sometimes traps can be fun. If you’re serious about her, I would shut that bratty shit down now. Oh, she’ll still try to manipulate you. Charlotte’s high if she thinks she doesn’t manipulate Ian.”
“My skull’s too thick to be manipulated,” Big Tag said, walking up with what looked like a slice of lemon pie. “At least that’s what my Charlie says when she’s giving the newbies her talk. Damn, Vail, is she talking to your girl? Shut that shit down now. We went wrong when we decided to let the subs talk amongst themselves. Keep quiet. That’s what I say.”
Sean rolled his blue eyes. “Sure, you do. Your wife is the ringleader and that pie was supposed to be for dessert, asshole.”
“Macon made two.” Eric was not unaware of Big Tag’s habit of stealing the desserts. He was always prepared—a fact Deena was about to learn the hard way. “I put one in the fridge for the big guy to find and the other in the…well, Macon knows where it is.”
“It’s in the beer fridge in the garage behind the wine bottles,” Big Tag said. “Hey, dude, I do this for a living. And I left the second pie totally unmolested. Well, I might have licked it, but what are a few germs amongst friends?”
Sean looked back at Eric. “He’s joking and don’t bother trying to hide pies from him. He can find anything.”
“That is unfortunately not true.” Tag’s smile dropped from his face and he seemed to lose his appetite, setting the pie on the table in the hall. “Should I go and talk to Charlie? If she’s putting ideas in Deena’s head, I’ll talk to her about it.”
“I’ll take care of it. I was telling Sean I’m going to take my sub home and have a long discussion with her. I won’t do anything that’s not in our contract, but I am planning on using an implement you haven’t signed me off on,” Eric said honestly.
Ian waved him off. “I’ve talked to the patrons of the clubs you’ve been at before. You’ve been playing for a decade.” That horrible guilt he’d seen slide across Big Tag’s face seemed to lift for a moment. “Anything particularly dangerous?”
“Only to her asshole,” he replied. He’d bought her a very nice plug yesterday. It looked like it was time for him to use it.
Big Tag slapped him on the shoulder. “Go forth and plug away, man. You know we’ve all turned into a bunch of pussies. We should plug our subs more often. And we should use the exotic lubes. A tiny bit of ginger, some jalapeño. That will get ’em moving. I’m going to have Grace put that on the calendar so I won’t forget. It’s important to keep up with the little things. Just because we’ve got two tiny humans who require our attention twenty-four seven doesn’t mean that I shouldn’t make time for an old-fashioned anal plugging. And why go home when you could use Sean’s dungeon? Er, excuse me, the present room. He tells his kid that. Seriously, you’re going to make her want to get in there even more than she normally would.”
Sean handed over the key. “It’s up the stairs, the last door on the right.” He turned back to Ian. “I told her if she went into the present room, she wouldn’t get any presents. That will keep her out of there. You know I’ve been doing this longer than you.”
“I got double the kids, brother,” Tag shot back. “I’m already more of a pro.”
“Sure you are, asshole.” Sean seemed to relish arguing with his brother. It was as though sarcasm was their own personal language. “And Eric, go on and set up and I’ll send her to you in about ten minutes. You have your kit?”
“It’s in my truck.” He was a freaking BDSM Boy Scout and she was about to find that out.
She wanted a dirty Dom? He could give her one.
* * * *
Deena looked at Charlotte Taggart and wished she’d kept her damn mouth shut. Now the queen of the subs thought she was a brat. She kind of was. The last several weeks had been wonderful and frustrating all at the same time. She’d gotten to know Eric and it was as bad as she’d thought. He was practically perfect and the man could cook. She’d been out to his apartment for dinner on the night Top was closed. Naturally his apartment was neat and efficient, though she thought it was a bit bland. It needed some flair, but it was obvious the man took care of the place. He’d made her shrimp and grits and she’d nearly cried at how perfect they were. They’d laughed and talked and then he’d taken her home, walked her to her door and said good-bye.
The damn man hadn’t even kissed her. He’d only kissed her twice since they’d agreed to be partners. She was starting to think he never would again.
“So your ex was an asshole?” Charlotte asked. At least she seemed to have moved on from that moment when Deena had admitted she’d been trying to get her ass spanked.
“Serious asshole,” Tiffany said with a shake of her head.
That girl always had her back. “He dumped me, but only after I’d put him through law school.” Why had she ever hidden this? It was freeing to be open about it. “He left me for one of the junior partners at the firm he hired on with after he graduated. He also left me with the beautiful gift of half his debt.”
“Damn, I would have left him with a bullet to the balls,” Charlotte said.
“Sometimes I wish I had,” Deena replied with a sigh. “But it wasn’t always bad. He was a good guy at one point. He was the kind of guy who opened doors and took care of a girl.”
“No, that was his façade,” Charlotte argued. The gorgeous redhead leaned forward. “He was never a good guy. No good guy could do what he did to you. You got fooled, Holmes. He played you.”
“Yes, I guess he did.” Somehow it seemed easier to believe he’d changed, that she hadn’t been taken in so totally.
Charlotte’s voice softened. “But that doesn’t mean everyone’s faking it. It doesn’t mean there are no good guys in the world, and it definitely doesn’t mean you need to be alone for the rest of your life.”
“Who said I was going to be alone for the rest of my life?” They were venturing into dangerous territory. Maybe this was why she’d never talked about her past.
Tiffany raised her hand. She’d had more than a couple. Her cheeks were flushed a pretty pink from the rum punch Grace was serving. “That was me. Totally me.”
She gave her friend a stare that she hoped would penetrate the rum haze she seemed to be in. “Is there a reason you talked about my private life to Big Tag’s wife?”
Charlotte’s eyes widened. “Oooo, you’ve got the intimidating stare down. Very nice.”
Tiffany frowned. “I was worried about you. I think you’re going to let something special go. I think you and Eric work and you’re all ‘I want to find some scumbag Dom who’ll take me sexually and not care about me as a human being.’”
Wow, she was far gone. “Not once have I said those words. I have said I want to keep things casual and I would like to see what a bad boy can bring to the table, but that’s my business and not yours.”
“If she’s your friend it’s totally her business,” Charlotte explained. “That’s how friendship works. She can’t turn off caring about you because you have boundaries. I’ve discovered that the best of friendships are also the ones where no one understands personal boundaries. A real friend will get all up in your business.”
Which was why she avoided them, but looking at Tiffany she had to wonder what she’d cut herself off from. Tiff and Ally were her girls. And she hadn’t hesitated to make her opinion plain when Ally had screwed up. She�
��d told Ally she’d fucked up and that she was mad but she still loved her friend.
Again, Big Tag’s words seemed to float in, haunting her. Would she even call Ally and Tiff after she’d started her new job? Or would it be easier to let them go in favor of more superficial relationships?
“I’m scared of how much I feel for Eric,” she admitted quietly.
Tiffany clapped her hands together. “I knew it. I knew you were madly in love with him.”
“Not in love.” She wasn’t sure she had it in her anymore. Being in love was too much work, too much potential for disaster. “I like him. I care about him and I’m not sure how to ask for what I want.”
Tiffany grinned. “You say ‘hey, hot chef Dom, you should really tenderize this beef.’”
“She’s going to need a ride home,” Charlotte said. “Too bad her training Dom isn’t here. As for you, you need to be honest with Eric. It’s hard to openly talk about these things, but it’s important. Intimacy and sex are things most of us view as private and dirty and taboo. We’re so much happier as human beings when we acknowledge our needs and don’t try to fight them because they’re outside the norm. He won’t be shocked. He’ll like the fact that you’re talking to him.”
“He’ll definitely like the fact that she wants to have dirty sex with him,” Tiffany said with another giggle.
Her friend was cutting loose tonight and it worried Deena a little. Tiffany wasn’t the girl who got drunk at parties. She tended to be the one who looked after everyone else. If someone was going to make a scene at the boss’s party, it would be Jenni.
Deena sighed. It looked like talking to Eric was going to have to wait. “I’ll think about what you said, Charlotte. I better take this one home.”
Tiffany’s nose was a nice shade of red when she looked up at Deena. “I don’t need to go home. I’m partying.”
The very fact that she’d used the word “partying” gave Deena pause. Tiffany was a fun girl, but she didn’t party or overdo anything. She was a serious artist, more thoughtful than wild. “We can party at your place.”
