Crave the Darkness: A Shaede Assassin Novel

by amanda bonilla

  “No,” he answered. He blinked several times as if regaining some of his focus. “They’ll all pay. Anya, my father, all of them.”

  According to Anya, Evelena’s father had been human, and her mother, a powerful Fae. Her mixed parentage had somehow lent her a strange immunity to Kade’s Incubus abilities. She’d told Anya once that their relationship had been fated. I wondered, could I use that information to my advantage?

  “Look at me. I’m all you need. Let her go, Kade and stay with me. We’re meant to be together. Release the Jinn.”

  His grip tightened around my hands. “I need her.”

  “You don’t,” I insisted. A thought took root in my mind. Something that might just push Kade over the edge. “I’ll kill her. Then she can’t send me away.”

  Kade’s jaw clenched and he released his grip on my hand, taking a step back. I hadn’t been sure to what level Adira had bound herself to him, but from his reaction, I guessed he’d gotten the platinum-level protection package. Or, at the very least, he was worried that since he’d siphoned off so much of her power, anything could happen to him if Adira died.

  “You can’t kill her.”

  I gave him a look that said, Oh no? Watch me.

  “Evelena, listen to me. You can’t kill her. We’re bound. You don’t understand.”

  I thought back, digging in my brain for more of Anya’s coaching. Evelena was fiercely jealous. I watched her rip the tongue from the mouth of a woman who came on to Kade at a bar once. She never was one for sharing.

  “Then make me understand. Do you love her, Kade? Did you find a way to cheat death only to tell me you need another woman more than me?” My voice escalated as I gave Kade a dose of the sudden temper that his mate had been known for. “Maybe I should kill you both!”

  Something in his expression changed. All of the anxiety, the doubt, just melted right off his angelic face. I’d struck gold with my temper tantrum. Evelena must have threatened Kade’s life on a regular basis. Not much of a surprise, considering he was part Incubus. Kade needed sex to survive. It was how he drained the life essence from his victims. And since Evelena was immune to Kade’s ability, his need for multiple sex partners must have been a sore subject for them. Well . . . for her.

  “I found a way around her rules,” he mused. “I beat death.”

  “You always get what you want,” I said with a smile. I was totally rocking the manic mood swings. “You brought me back, and now you can let her go.”

  “I have more to do,” Kade looked away, and I forced his face back to mine.

  “And I’ll help you in all things. Let her go, Kade.”

  This was the tricky part. I could beg and plead with him to let Adira go for the rest of my life. But unless he truly believed that he didn’t need her anymore, the bond wouldn’t break.

  “You have to decide. It’s me or her. I won’t share you.”

  I could see the gears grinding in Kade’s mind. He’d told me that he’d found a way to manipulate the Jinn rules. That once he’d learned how to make himself truly need everything he asked for, Adira couldn’t help but grant all of his wishes. I had a sneaking suspicion, though, that by siphoning Adira’s magic through sex, he’d inadvertently snagged her ability to grant wishes. Dollars to doughnuts he’d been granting his own wishes for a while now.

  “I don’t need her to be bound to me,” he said as if in the midst of a great epiphany. “What I’ve taken from her is far more valuable than anything she’s given me. You’re right Evelena. I. Don’t. Need. Her.”

  It was like Kade had uttered some set of ancient esoteric words. He truly believed it. In his heart, soul, mind, he’d decided that he no longer needed Adira’s protection. I wondered, had it been the illusion of Evelena that had sealed the deal or the fact that no amount of protection could equal what he’d taken from her? A ripple of energy brushed across my skin, reminiscent of the sensation I felt whenever Tyler was near. But instead of washing against me like waves kissing the shore, the energy faded. Ebbed away until all I could sense was Kade.

  Every time I’d been in his presence, the energy signature I’d recognized was Jinn. It was still there in a sort of mutated form, since he’d siphoned Adira’s essence. But it felt different now. Almost sticky as it undulated against my skin. Kade’s energy reminded me of the feeling you get when intuition tugs at your subconscious. The fight or flight reflex that makes your stomach clench and adrenaline pulse through your body. Kade was a sexual predator by nature. Of course, his energy would make me feel like prey.

  I steeled myself against the self-preservation synapses firing in my brain. Kade’s bond with Adira had been broken. She was free. Now, to finish the job Tyler had paid me to do.

  “Kade,” I said, my voice dripping with sexual promise. “Let’s go somewhere more . . . private.”

  Chapter 32

  I’d chosen a meeting place close to my apartment for a reason. I couldn’t exactly be my usual stealthy self, bound up in Pamela’s spell. My skin still felt too tight on my bones, and because of the glamour, becoming incorporeal wasn’t an option.

  “Where are we going?” Kade asked as we rounded the corner. My apartment building was in sight, Tyler’s silver dagger tucked between my mattresses. It wouldn’t take much coaxing to get Kade into bed—as it was, he was having a hard time keeping his hands off me—and when I got him right where I wanted him, well . . . his death would certainly have a poetic justice to it.

  “Just a private place for us to get . . . reacquainted.” I raked my gaze up Kade’s body, infused my words with a husky tone. Since the real Evelena had been immune to Kade’s abilities and I sure as hell wasn’t, I had to play coy for as long as possible. I could flirt my ass off, though. And I figured Kade would expect nothing less from his mate. She’d make him work for it.

  I climbed the steps of my building and Kade stopped short, one foot on the bottom step. “How long have you been back that you were able to find this private space?”

  Suspicious SOB. I couldn’t wait to get the bastard alone so I could kill him. “A gift.” I shrugged my shoulders dismissively. “From your Jinn. Call it a going away present.” Kade began to climb the stairs, and I flashed him a sexy smile. “We’ll need somewhere to stay for a while. Once we kill Anya and find your father’s book, we can leave Seattle and go wherever you want.”

  Kade paused midway up the steps, his eyes narrowed dangerously. My heart sank into my stomach as the last—and probably most important—piece of information Anya had given me played in my mind: You can’t use the book as leverage, Darian. No one knew about its existence but Kade, Dimitri, and me. He didn’t trust anyone else, not even Evelena, with that information.

  Fuck. My. Life.

  I’d been so careful. Goddamn it, how could I have allowed myself to slip? The illusion was too real, my words to Kade so convincing, I’d bought the lie myself. And then, I let my guard down, got comfortable in the role I’d been playing, and forgot to carefully weigh each word before I spoke. I’d freed Adira, but I’d just secured my own death.

  Kade took the last three steps in a single leap. None too gently, he slammed me into the door, pinning my shoulders beneath his hands. He leaned in until our noses were almost touching. “What book?”

  How to answer? A million scenarios flashed before my eyes, each of them resulting in an answer that would anger Kade and rat me out. I winced as his fingers dug into my shoulders. He took a deep breath. “What book, Evie?”

  Evie. Anya had never mentioned any sort of nickname. I didn’t think a girl with a nasty streak like Evelena would appreciate something as cute as Evie. “Don’t call me that,” I snapped. “It makes me sound like a fucking puppy.”

  Kade leaned in until his mouth brushed my ear. “Wrong,” he whispered. “What’s the matter, did your return trip from the hereafter affect your memory? I know it’s been a while, but how could you forget what name I called out while I was pumping into you?”

  Strike two. It�
�s not like Anya would know the pet names Kade used during sex. And, ew. “Kade.” My voice burned with a warning fire. “I’ve been fucking dead. You might want to consider cutting your fated mate a little slack.”

  “Fated mate?” Kade scoffed. He pulled back so he could look me in the eye. “Evelena did believe we were meant for one another, but you’re not her. Who are you?”

  When I didn’t answer right away, he slammed me against the door. “Is that how you treat the woman you love?” I still wasn’t willing to fold. Not yet.

  “What’s up there?” Kade jerked his head toward the building. “An ambush?”

  If I could get into my apartment, I could get to the dagger. “Why don’t you take me up there and find out for yourself?”

  “Why not? I have an appointment in a few hours that I have to keep, but I could use a distraction. First, though, I want to know who you really are, because there’s no way in hell you’re my mate. Offer me the truth now, and I might be lenient with you.”

  I bucked my chin in the air, defiant as ever and twice as stubborn. “What’s the matter, Kade? Can’t believe what your eyes tell you? I’m Ev-e-lena.”

  He smiled, clearly amused. “Well, there’s one way to tell for sure, something that can’t be covered by a clever disguise.”

  Before I could react, he kissed me. Like the last time he’d laid his lips to mine, something pulled from my center, as if my very soul were being coaxed from my body. I tried to break away, but Kade pushed his body against mine, pinning me against the building. He reached out and cupped my face between his hands, deepening the kiss. I struggled against him, tried to force my lips tight as his tongue thrust into my mouth. Any fight I’d had in me drained out the moment he deepened the kiss. Only the pressure of his body against mine was holding me up; my legs shook, no longer able to support my weight. My body tingled with thousands of tiny pinpricks, and I grew pleasantly light-headed. Drunk. Brain-addled as though I’d chugged a pitcher of margaritas on an empty stomach and went for a ride on a Tilt-A-Whirl.

  Kade broke the kiss and my stomach lurched. He pulled me against him, and his own speech was a little slurred and drunken sounding as he whispered in my ear, “Gods, how I love complicated women.”

  Strike three. Fuck.

  My bones turned to Jell-O, and I couldn’t muster the strength for a snarky comeback. Kade took a step away from me and my legs gave out. I crumpled onto the concrete entryway, bruising my tailbone in the process. A sharp pain shot up my spine and I dug in with my heels, pushing until my back was against the door. One more kiss like that and I wouldn’t be able to lift my arms, let alone plunge a dagger into his heart.

  With as much care as he’d show a bag of groceries, Kade hauled me up by the collar. “You’re in way over your head, little girl,” he admonished as he pushed open the door. One quick shove and I sailed into the elevator compartment. Something in my shoulder popped, and I clenched my jaw tight, determined not to scream. But, holy shit! It hurt like a motherfucker. Kade stepped into the elevator and slammed the gate closed. The elevator, which was nothing more than a metal cage, lurched as it started its ascent and my head swam as dizziness washed over me. “So, you want to play house, eh, Trouble?” Kade smirked as he looked down on me. “I’m more than ready to play, wife.”

  I tried like hell to think in a straight line, but whatever part of my essence Kade had taken from me kept my mind spinning in circles, and for some damn reason, all I could think about was his kiss and the fact that some crazy part of me wanted more. Pain radiated down my arm, distracting me from my thoughts. Even with my quick healing, a dislocated shoulder wasn’t going to mend properly until it had been set right, and the pain made it impossible for me to raise my right arm higher than my waist. Which meant if I could get my hands on the dagger, I’d have to stab the bastard left-handed. Not ideal considering my already weakened condition.

  Kade pulled the gate open before the elevator had even come to a halt. He reached for my right arm, and I recoiled, knowing if he pulled it would hurt like a son of a bitch. He sighed and rolled his eyes before dragging me up by my left arm. “This isn’t going to work,” he mused. Without warning, he threw me against the wall, pulling my right wrist while shoving into my shoulder with the other hand. I couldn’t help the scream that burst from my lips as the joint popped back into place and another wave of nausea crashed over me. “Sorry, wife, but I like it rough. Don’t want you bitching about a hurt shoulder while I’m fucking you; it’d spoil the mood.”

  “No way would you get laid without the supernatural mojo,” I seethed through gritted teeth. “You might be nice to look at, Kade, but you have the personality of a rabid badger.”

  “Such compliments from my mate,” Kade purred. “You’re making me hard.” He grabbed my hand and pressed it against his erection, and my stomach heaved as he cupped his hand over mine, forcing the prolonged contact.

  “Why don’t we just drop the pretense.” For once, I prayed my smart-ass mouth could buy me some time. My head still swam from the effects of Kade’s kiss, but I held it together as best I could. “We both know I’m not Evelena. And besides,” I added as an afterthought, “I really don’t like that name.”

  “Oh, but you are my mate,” Kade continued in that too-sweet voice. A heady scent floated on the air, musky and warm. Like sex. “See the truth for yourself.”

  He spun me around so that I could see myself in the large mirror that hung on the wall in my living room. Unnerved didn’t begin to describe the way I felt as I stared at my own reflection and a stranger stared back. “Glamour.”

  “No,” Kade murmured close to my ear. A chill raced across my skin, too pleasant and full of promise. My body rallied against my mind as it grew warm, aroused from whatever supernatural pheromone Kade was throwing off. “You’re Evelena. Mine.”

  “I’m not yours.” The lazy quality returned to my voice as Kade kissed my neck once, twice, and again.

  “Mine.”

  “No.”

  “We’ll see about that.” He turned me around, and the relief I felt at not having to see that alien face staring out at me from the mirror was palpable. It didn’t stop Kade’s assault, however. I had a feeling that defense wasn’t part of the Cambion’s battle strategy; he preferred to stay on the offense. And Kade wasn’t about to let me get the upper hand. I’d just barely gotten control of my limbs and could support the weight of my own body when he kissed me again.

  His kisses were a drug. Heroin. Raw, uncut, super sex heroin. The kind that rushes into your blood stream and shoots through your system with the speed of a bullet train. At least, that’s how I assumed shooting up heroin would feel. My brain got a little fuzzy at the edges and eventually abandoned its futile attempt at rebellion, joining forces with my body to ruin me. As if my arms had a mind of their own, they wrapped around Kade’s neck, drawing him closer. When he pulled away, I tried to drag him back, to feel more of that electric rush, that raw sexual energy.

  “Nature favors the predator,” he purred as he led me toward my bed. I followed like an obedient pet, my legs wobbling like a newborn foal. “I take what my body needs to survive. And in return, my victims get to feel unparalleled pleasure before they die.”

  “I-It’s still r-rape,” I stuttered. “Someone needs to c-castrate you, K-Kade.”

  “Are you the woman to do it?” he asked.

  “Yes,” I said, feeling anything but confident in my ability. Then I laughed. A silly, drunken giggle. “I am going to do it.”

  “Promises, promises,” he muttered. Kade traced the pad of his forefinger across my cheek and another potent bloom of that musky scent enveloped me. My eyes drifted shut as a warm rush spread from my thighs outward. The tiniest sense of fright took root in my mind and that same flight or fight reflex tugged at my subconscious. “It’s not rape if the victim is begging for it. And believe me, Evelena. You’ll be begging me as well.”

  “Not Evelena,” I said, stumbling on my own feet. My ass
bounced down on the mattress of my bed as I listed to one side and back up straight. To the side and up straight. Jesus, stop the boat, already. I was beginning to feel seasick.

  “Yes, you are,” Kade replied. “You look like her. Sound like her. I wonder if you’ll fuck like her.”

  “Go to hell.”

  Kisses rained down on my face, my lips, my neck. My mind reeled from the intoxicating effects of Kade’s mouth, hands, and fingers on my skin. Anya had warned me that he secreted addictive venom that would seep into my pores. Somewhere, deep inside of me, I knew this was wrong. That the arousal I felt was contrived, forced on me by whatever ability Kade possessed to seduce his victims. This was a violation of not just my body, but my mind. I tried to focus on anything but the pulsing waves of need that swept over me, but it was damned near impossible when all I wanted was more.

  He really does look like an angel. . . . I shook my head to clear my reeling thoughts. Kade smiled as he placed another lazy kiss on my mouth, and I shuddered. God, I wanted him. Needed him.

  “Take off your shirt.”

  I tried not to laugh, but I couldn’t help the giddy haze blanketing my mind. “No,” I answered petulantly. “Better men than you have tried to get into my pants. And failed.”

  “Evelena,” Kade whispered as his fingers feathered down my neck. “Take off your shirt.”

  I caught my reflection in the mirror across the room. Evelena’s dark eyes stared back at me, her face framed by a torrent of black curls, and I wondered, had I lost myself completely? It looked like Pamela’s threefold rule was hitting me hard and fast. I’d deceived Kade through witchcraft and trickery, using his dead mate against him. Now I was paying three times over by literally taking the place of the woman he’d lost. He brushed his palms across my breasts and my nipples hardened even as my stomach lurched. Damn it, I needed to get my head straight.

  Every kiss, every touch sent me farther from reality. My limbs became so heavy I could barely lift them, and Kade continued his unhurried assault, taking his time and exacting his sick punishment for trying to deceive him. “I want to watch you undress, Evelena,” he said, kissing my jawline. I whimpered as his fingers teased my nipples through my shirt, both wanting and repulsed by his touch all at once. Though I’d never taken any drugs before, I’d been drunk more than a few times. And right now I was absolutely shitfaced. I was past the point of rational decision making and any suggestion seemed completely logical. Kade wanted me to undress for him. Sure! Why the hell not?