Evil Of Love
Page 8
A moan escapes him and that’s what I want; him to want me as much as I want him. I don’t stop, picking up my pace and his hips begin to move as he pushes in and out of my mouth. No matter what he does to me I still crave him. I desire to be wanted. For too long I was told what a piece of shit I was and now I can’t stand when Travis hates me or when he’s mad at me. I have to make it better between us even if it’s temporary. I continue to move as his hand guides me and I can feel him swelling in my mouth and the veins are bulging against my tender lips. He’s ready. Pushing down harder on him he bucks his hips one more time and he explodes in my mouth. I hate that I’m asking for forgiveness by sucking his dick when he is the one that was mean in the first place, but I need him to want me. It’s the only thing that keeps me sane. I swallow looking up at him threw my lashes as I lick my lips and he rubs his thumb along my lower lip, tugging my chin and pulling me up to his mouth. His tongue moves around my lips, licking and sucking and I moan as I feel myself becoming wet.
“I forgive you,” he whispers against my lips and then he presses his mouth to mine, his tongue moves inside meeting with mine, and tasting himself. He gently pulls away and my cheeks are on fire. “I love you, Stephanie. That’s why I’m so hard on you. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.”
“I know.”
“Come on. Go grab your swim suit and we’ll lay out here in the sun this afternoon.”
I nod getting up from his lap and he smacks my ass as I turn around. Treading confidently, I head to the bedroom to change. I know it’s fucked up, I know it deep down, but I can’t help it. I can’t bear him being angry so I have to make it better. Even if that means I take all the blame. Two years of this with him and I know how he works; a good blow job and his mood changes.
Chapter Ten
Travis
I’ve never hit her like that before and I hate that I had to do it, but god dammit she has to pull her shit together. Yeah, I’m not perfect, but I have a reputation to uphold and how’s it going to look us going out in public and her hand all beat up like that and to think she did it to herself. The last thing I need is rumors to start spreading so I had to punish her to keep her from thinking it’s okay for her to act out. She needs to see that it’s unacceptable because it could reflect poorly on me. She knows my fucking image is everything! Being the CEO of a bank is not easy and sometimes I think she takes me for granted. She’s gorgeous, which is why I married her, and she’s broken. She’s never opened up to me, but I know something happened to her when she was younger, which is why I have to show her the right way to be. I can’t even imagine where she would be without me.
When I met her she was working a dead end job barely making enough to support herself. I gave her everything and the least she can do to repay me is obey and be the wife that I need. I need someone that makes me look good and can keep me happy. I knew she would be the one to do that, but lately she’s been a little challenging. I love her and I will do anything for her. It’s always been that way, that’s why when shit doesn’t go the way I need it to I lose control. She causes me to lose control. When you love someone so much it’s hard to stay sane. I hate that she makes me become this person, but it’s the only way I can get her to obey and understand.
I’ve seen it, where the woman does as she pleases and it doesn’t take long before she’s tempted by another man. My dad was a fucking asshole, yes, but my mom is the cunt who had the affair. He hit her, time and time again, but I was witness to the bullshit she would say to him. She provoked him every time. She knew just how to push his buttons. Hell if I allow Stephanie to get to that point. She already provokes me as it is and lying is something I can’t stand. She has another thing coming if she thinks I’ll let it slide all because she sucked my dick. I’ll pretend like I forgive her for now, but if she slips one more time she’ll see what I’m really capable of when I’m angry.
***
Stephanie
Tossing and turning, unable to sleep from all my thoughts of Eric, plus the sound of Travis’ heavy breathing in my ear is driving me crazy. Sitting pool side for the afternoon went well, it was peaceful and Travis’ had several glasses of Jack which explains his heavy snoring tonight. I look over to the clock which displays in red one thirty, I huff and slowly crawl out of bed doing my best not to disturb him. I grab my robe wrapping it around my bare skin and walk quietly downstairs. I haven’t checked my email since I’ve been with Travis all day so I go to check just to see if I got anything from Eric. I know we’re meeting tomorrow, but I want to talk to him even if it’s just words in an email. I move the mouse turning on the screen and proceed to open the website for my email. Once logged in it displays at the top right of the screen, one unread message, so I click it, noting it’s from Eric’s email address.
Steph
I don’t know if you’ll get this before morning, but I just wanted to talk to you. I feel this would be so much easier if you had a phone, but if email is how we can communicate then I’ll take it. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow. I can’t go to sleep because all I can think of is you. When I saw you the other day so many emotions have come flooding back. I loved you ten years ago Stephanie and I still do. I know you’re married, but if friendship is what I can have then I’ll take it. I’ll do anything to be around you. I don’t ever want to lose you again.
Can’t wait to see you!
I love you,
Eric
Tears are softly rolling down my cheeks as I close his email. I can’t email him back because the things I want to say to him, I shouldn’t even be thinking as a married woman. Friends are all we can be, it’s all we’ll ever be. I moved on. I have Travis and I could never betray him. He doesn’t have to know about Eric’s and my friendship, but to hurt Travis by having an affair is not something he deserves. No one deserves that sort of betrayal. Especially with what happened between his parents. He didn’t tell me everything, but I know enough to know that it would kill him to lose me to another man. Even if he hurts me now and again I will never hurt him back. I log out of the email, deleting the history before turning off the computer. In the living room I grab a book turning on a side lamp and fall asleep to the beautiful words on the page.
Morning comes quickly and I’m awoken to the smell of Travis’ cologne. I blink my eyes a few times before opening them.
“Good morning. How come you came downstairs? You okay?” Travis asks calmly and apparently in a good mood.
“I’m fine. I was just having a hard time sleeping last night so I came down to read for a bit. I must’ve fallen asleep,” I reply, stretching my limbs and sitting up on the couch.
“Would you like some coffee?” he asks and I notice the two coffee cups he has in his hands.
“Yes. Thank you.”
He hands me one of the cups and then sits on the couch next to me. He’s careful when he sits down to avoid wrinkles on his black suit jacket. He’s dressed and ready for work.
“You know I love you right?” Travis asks and I look over to him in astonishment.
“Of course!”
“I don’t mean to be cruel to you. I just need you to understand why I get angry.”
I interrupt not wanting this conversation to get too serious, “Please, Travis. I know. You don’t need to explain anything to me. I understand.” I lean over kissing his cheek then taking a sip of my coffee.
“I just don’t want you to be angry with me, Steph. I don’t want this,” he says lifting up my bandaged hand, “to ever happen again.”
“It won’t. I promise, Travis.”
“Also, I’m sorry I did this to you,” he says caressing the darkened swollen bruise on my cheek. “You drive me crazy sometimes Steph, but I shouldn’t have hurt you like that. I need you to listen to me so I don’t get out of control again. Okay?”
“Okay.” I nod taking another sip of my coffee which causes him to drop his hand from my cheek.
“So… what do you have planned today?” I don’t want
to answer his questions because I hate to lie, but I don’t need to cause suspicion either.
“I might go into the market if that’s okay with you? I wanted to pick up some fresh vegetables and look at their flowers.”
“Will you be going with anyone?” he questions raising an eyebrow.
“Just, Thomas. I was hoping he could take me.”
“I guess that will be fine if Thomas is with you. Wear some sun glasses. I don’t want someone recognizing you and then starting rumors about what happened to your face. Please behave as well. I have a reputation to keep.”
“I will.”
He finishes his coffee on the couch with me before standing and kissing me goodbye. When the front door shuts I take our cups into the kitchen rinsing them out. I’m conflicted if I should even meet up with Eric this morning. I’m afraid I’m starting something I won’t be able to finish. Knowing that even if I try I won’t be able to stay away from him so I decide I better go and get an idea of how this friendship is going to work. I can’t deny that I’m dying to see him and the butterflies in my stomach are going wild.
By the time I’m out of the shower it’s already nine o’clock. I blow dry my hair, straightening it, and apply makeup making sure to cover my swollen bruise as best as possible. The sun glasses will cover the rest of it. I re-wrap my hand, using fewer bandages and only covering my knuckles since that’s the part that’s mostly beat up. It still hurts, but seems to be getting a little better. I put on my turquoise summer dress with my white heels. The dress is just above my knees and fitted to my body and the heels make me a few inches taller which I love. I put on a white cardigan since it’s still a little chilly outside this morning.
Grabbing my purse I walk outside around the back of the house until I reach Thomas. He’s already at the door waiting outside on his porch.
“Mrs. Barnes. Are you ready?”
“Yeah. But…”
“Mr. Barnes called me advising you would need to be escorted to the market today.”
“Oh.” Well of course! Travis doesn’t trust me, and I guess he probably shouldn’t. “Yes I’m ready, Thomas. And thank you for agreeing to take me today. I really hate to ask it of you.” God I wish I had my car.
“It’s what I’m here for. Mr. Barnes also asked if I accompany you around the market today. Is that what you wish?”
“Um… well I will be meeting a friend so I’ll be okay on my own as long as this stays between me and you. Is that okay?”
“Of course, Mrs. Barnes. Like I said before, anything you need just let me know. I do not plan on getting in the middle your relationship with your husband and I work for the both of you so if you wish for me not to tell Mr. Barnes then I’ll agree not to,” he replies winking at me. “What time do you need to be there?”
“Ten.”
“Let’s get going then; we’ll make it just on time.”
“Okay, but one more thing Thomas.”
“Yes?”
“Please call me Stephanie, not Mrs. Barnes. I feel so old when you call me that.”
“Of course, Stephanie, but please forgive me ahead of time if I don’t use your first name in front of your husband as I do believe he would find it disrespectful.”
“Understandable,” I reply turning on my expensive white heels and I follow Thomas to his car.
Thomas is not much older than I, but I’ve always taken him to be very old fashioned in his manors. He’s always been polite and good company, but never before had I asked him to take me somewhere. I always walked because I was too afraid Travis would find out I was meeting Zoey. It’s good to know Thomas doesn’t plan on starting any problems between my husband and me. This prevents me having to walk forever in my heels as well.
We pull into the semi busy streets. During the work week the market slows down, but there’s still good business. It’s the best place to buy your flowers and any fresh food. It doesn’t take long to get to the market by car so we’re about fifteen minutes early. This time I have Thomas drop me off right in front of the small coffee shop that I had coffee with Eric in before.
“What time shall I return?”
“I’m honestly not sure, Thomas. Um…”
“Here,” he says cutting me off and holding out a small black cell phone, “take my phone and call my home number when you’re almost done. I’ll wait at home for your call and come get you when you’re ready.”
“Are you sure?”
“Of course. This way you don’t feel rushed.”
“Thank you so much!” I reply grabbing the small device from his hand.
“My home number is plugged in the contacts listed as home.”
“Great! Thank you! I’ll call you then.”
He nods and I shut the door turning towards the coffee shop. Travis took my phone from me around the same time he made me sale my car. He says there is no need for me to have a cell phone and that if I need to reach him I’m at home anyways so I need to use the house line. I truly dislike not having the freedom that I had become accustomed to when on my own, but there is no arguing with Travis. For the last two years my only communication with the outside world has been through my email that Travis doesn’t know about. I can’t even call my mom from the house phone because he goes through the records and he doesn’t like me speaking to my family.
I tuck the cell phone in my purse and open the door to the coffee shop, hearing the bells on the door chime as it closes. Looking around I don’t see Eric so I decide to order a black coffee and I find a table off to the side near a window. It doesn’t take long before I hear the bells on the front door again and I look up catching Eric’s brilliant green eyes peering at me. He’s white teeth showing through the grin on his face. His blonde hair mangled and sexy and I can see the ripples of his muscles through his white shit. His tan skin glistens in the light of the sun. I wouldn’t doubt if my jaw is on the ground right now. He’s stunning. I notice now that he has a tattoo on his forearm. I hadn’t noticed it the last time. I may have been in shock. He walks over to my table and I stand doing my best to control my shaky legs and he leans into me, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me in for a hug. As my cheek is pressed against his chest I inhale him and my knees almost buckle. He leans down kissing my cheek before releasing me from his grasp. He touches me as if he’s been doing it the last ten years. The feel of his body close to mine seems as if no time has passed at all.
“You look gorgeous, Steph,” he says looking me up and down. I’ve still got my sun glasses on in an effort to hide my bruise. His eyes linger on my hand longer than what I would like, but he doesn’t say anything.
“You don’t look so bad yourself, Eric,” I compliment, teasingly and subconsciously placing my hand on his abs and once I touch him my face flushes pink with the heat that surges through my veins. I drop my hand doing my best not to show my reaction, but he grabs my wrist and holds my hand up to his chest.
“I’ve missed you so much, Steph.”
Now I’m red! I quickly pull away and sit down. He follows my movements and pulls the chair from the opposite side of the small round table over by me and he takes a seat as his knee rubs against my leg. I look down at my cup of coffee, taking a sip, afraid that if I gaze at him I might lose all control. I study the tattoo that appears on his arm and trails up and under his shirt. Thick dark designs that make me want to trace the lines with my fingers and find out where they lead to. It’s beautiful and fits perfectly on his muscular forearm.
“Stephanie?”
I look up to meet those brilliant green eyes. “Yes?”
He reaches up to my face and before I know it he’s pulling off my sun glasses. “What the fuck! What the hell happened?” his voice echo’s in the small coffee shop and has everyone staring at us. I attempt to snatch my glasses from him, but he pulls away quicker. Shit! I didn’t realize it looked that bad!
“Nothing, Eric,” I grit through my teeth, angry with embarrassment. However I’m not angry with him, I’m a
ngry with myself for letting it happen. He peers at my bandaged hand again, then glaring back at me with fiery in his eyes and I duck my head in fear. I know that rage. I know it in Travis, too well.
“And your hand? Is that nothing too, Stephanie?” he whispers this time, but the anger still seeps through his voice. “I swear to God if he hurt you, Stephanie… I will fucking kill him!”
“I don’t want to talk about it. Okay?” I whisper back, praying to God he won’t push the issue.
“Okay,” he replies calmly. “For now.”
I sigh in relief I feel the tension in him ease and his eyes become warmer as he looks at me. “I’m sorry, Steph. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just don’t know what I would do if someone was hurting you.”
“Do you want a coffee?” I ask changing the subject.
“Actually I can’t this time. My trainer is getting hard on me with the fight coming up and all. So nothing goes in my mouth unless it’s to better my health.” He winks and my gaze falls to his full lips and the memory of them on me, tasting me. “The coffee was for your pleasure and so I can admire the way your lips look every time you bring your cup to them, I love watching your mouth as it parts and presses against the rim.”
His eyes now on my mouth, a chill runs up my back, “Eric?”