Second Chance Mates Box 1

by Rosa Swann

  He nods, but I can see he doesn’t like it.

  “Get me to my bed.” I hold onto my last shred of confusion, because the other emotions rising inside me, I don’t want to deal with them in front of Wilder.

  He helps me up carefully, leading me to the bed and helping me under the covers. Then he quietly leaves the room.

  As soon as the door closes behind him, tears start to roll down my cheeks and sobs wrack my body.

  Why? How? What the hell is going on? I need my mate, I need Logan.

  7. Wilder

  What the hell just happened? In the hallway, Sterling’s scent still lingers and even though I can appreciate it, it doesn’t drive me crazy anymore. How can I have mated Sterling? How can we have betrayed Logan like this? Like losing him wasn’t bad enough, we had to mess everything up and make it all the more complicated.

  I stumble down the stairs, quickly hiding in the guest room. I rip off my clothes, but no matter what I do, Sterling’s scent remains, surrounding me. I’ve never felt as bad as this. I did something stupid and it’s all my own fault.

  Staying with Sterling and Maddy should have allowed us all some closure. It wasn’t meant to get messed up like this.

  I’m sorry, Logan. I’m sorry, Sterling. I’m sorry, Maddy and Sarah. They are the last thoughts before I hit the bed and pass out from exhaustion.

  Morning comes way too soon, the light slipping into the room and enhancing the shadows of the boxes, bookshelves and other things in the room. All things that Logan brought with him when he left me, immediately reminding me of the stupidest mistake of my life. It’s no longer that I let Logan go, no, the stupidest mistake is mating his mate, marking his Omega as mine.

  I look at the clothes on the floor, the ones I discarded there last night. Maybe not a good idea to try those on again, I’m pretty sure they smell like Sterling, and sex. So I grab a clean set of clothes, making sure to choose some that are sturdy enough to handle life on this little cottage. The house is quiet, which suits me fine right now, I’m not sure I can face Sterling, or even Maddy, just yet.

  I’ve got no idea what time it is, and after the night I had, maybe that is the best thing, being a little lost in time. Only, as I get out of the guest room, my stomach rumbles, so I start breakfast anyway. As I look around the kitchen, I realise I want to make something to apologise to Sterling, or at least do something, anything, that may make this situation less tense. Because our situation hasn’t gotten any better, just worse.

  It all started with meeting him at the funeral, then offering to keep an eye on him and staying here. And now… now this. I should never have gone to the funeral. That’s where it all went wrong. I grab milk and other ingredients for pancakes. Pancakes are the only apology food that I know and everyone likes pancakes, right?

  Making the batter is no issue, the ingredients coming together easily. The motions come back to me, and I fall into a sort of trance. Scooping up the batter, pouring it in the pan, letting the top of it dry out, flipping it and finally sliding it on a plate. There is nothing as calming as this, making pancakes, making breakfast. Making breakfast for others.

  When I’m done, the house is still quiet. But at least it smells good, I guess? I sit down at the table, unsure what to do next. I don’t want to start eating yet, it feels… rude when it’s someone else’s house. I’m about to take a look in the garden when Maddy’s feet sound down the hall. As she steps into the kitchen, her eyes immediately search me out.

  “Good morning.” I stand up, ready to get her some breakfast.

  “Wilder?” Her voice sounds serious, making me look at her.

  “Yes?” I know that when little kids sound this serious, you need to pay attention.

  “Why is Daddy still in bed?” She looks as confused about the situation as I am about her question.

  “I don’t know. Doesn’t he sleep in late?”

  She shakes her head. “Daddy’s always awake first. He gives the animals breakfast before he makes us breakfast.”

  Ah, so he’s the one who takes care of the animals. That makes sense. “Let’s go check on Daddy, then.” I hold out my hand and she takes it easily as we make our way to Sterling’s bedroom. It occurs to me how easily she has accepted me being here, or, maybe it’s just that she accepts me being here for now. I imagine that there have been people in and out of the house all week since Logan passed away. In front of Sterling’s door, I’m not so sure if I should have come with Maddy, I can already smell Sterling’s heat.

  Maddy knocks on the door. “Daddy?”

  “Yeah, baby?” Sterling’s voice is a little rough.

  “Can I come in?” She waits impatiently for his answer.

  I hear some rustling inside, then Sterling speaks again. “Sure, come on in.”

  Maddy opens the door and rushes in, crossing the distance of the room in no-time, climbing in bed with her daddy. “Are you sick? Do you feel ill? Are you sleepy?” She keeps asking him questions.

  Sterling’s scent is strong, though not strong enough that I can’t resist it right now. It will probably be a lot worse again tonight, as an Omega’s scent and hormones will drop just after sex, only to rise again a couple of hours later, until the point where it drives Alphas, like me, crazy.

  Sterling’s eyes are on me as he answers her. “I’m fine. Just feeling a little tired right now.” His face is still flushed, his eyes a little hazy and red-rimmed.

  I step into the room, wandering over to the bed and put my hand to his cheek. “You’re a little hot. Maybe you should stay in bed. I’ll have Maddy bring you breakfast.” As I know that I shouldn’t be around Sterling too much right now.

  “He made pancakes.” Maddy’s happy again now she knows Sterling is fine.

  “So that’s what I’m smelling. I think I could eat some.” He smiles at her, then his eyes fall on me. “Maddy knows how to feed the animals, but she’ll need your help to do it. Could you, please?”

  “Sure. You just focus on recovering.” I wince. Apart from me having my way with him last night, there isn’t really much to ‘recover’ from. Being in heat is just part of life for an Omega, though, if he’s been taking pills ever since Maddy was born, I can imagine she’s never seen him like this before.

  Sterling raise his eyebrows. “Nothing a couple of days of bed rest wouldn’t fix.” I know he’s trying to get me to shut up, but I just can’t.

  I feel weird, this talking around the subject instead of about the subject, about what happened last night, what we did. “Maddy, can you put on work clothes, so we can feed the animals before breakfast?”

  She nods and bounces off the bed. “I’ll put on my overalls.” And she’s gone.

  Sterling lets out a low laugh, almost sad. “Logan bought her a new pair a couple of months ago, as she outgrew her previous one. And she’s so proud of it, apparently she now has a real ‘big girls’ version.”

  I appreciate that he really doesn’t want to talk about all of this, but I need to. “Star…”

  His eyes darken and his jaw sets. “Don’t. I don’t—”

  But I cut him short. “I’m sorry. I won’t let it happen again. I feel so bad about last night.”

  “Let it happen?” His voice sounds… off.

  “Not controlling myself. Not protecting you from yourself…”

  “You’ve not spent a lot of time with an Omega, have you?” He shakes his head. “There is no way to resist my heat. It happened. I’m confused as to why as I’ve never heard of this before, but it happened.” Tears start to form in his eyes. “You really don’t know much about Omegas, do you? I thought that before, you said you’d lost a mate? Did you not live with them?”

  I look away. I can’t tell him that Logan was my mate. But I also can’t lie to him, he’d know. I’m sure of that. “He was an Alpha.” I wait for the judgement. Two Alpha’s together, it’s not right. Alphas mate Omegas, not other Alphas. That’s what Logan told me when he left, and I guess he was right…

 
“I’m sorry. I’m stupid for assuming…” Sterling touches my arm. “Don’t blame yourself for this. I initiated it and abused your instinct. When you followed me and opened that door… There wasn’t anything you could have done. My fault was not locking both doors to keep you out.”

  “I could have stayed sane. You’re Logan’s mate.” I force the words out, I need to remind myself of this. No matter what happened last night, no matter the mark I left on his shoulder. “I’ll leave. It’s not safe if I stay here. Not for you.” Or for me.

  “You can’t leave. I’m not in any state to run a household. I can’t even go outside. That wouldn’t be safe.” He sighs. “I know I’m Logan’s mate. Don’t you think I know that? Don’t you think I’m as confused as you are, maybe even more? I hurt. This all hurts so much. But we’re going to have to make it work, at least for the next couple of days.” He curls up in bed, tears now sliding down his cheeks and I realise that Sterling probably hasn’t even slept; his voice, his puffy eyes, he must have been crying all night. “Do you know how painful and scary this is? I miss him.” His voice breaks and he squeezes his eyes shut tightly.

  I kneel down next to the bed so I can look at him, putting my fingers to his cheek, wiping away the tears. I’m fighting to keep my own tears in check, my eyes already burning. “I know. I know how you feel.” He has no idea how similar we really are. I stand up again. “I’m going to get Maddy, and I’ll have her bring you up some breakfast later.” My voice sounds weird, hollow.

  “Thank you.” His words are quiet.

  “It’s what I’m here for.” I close the door behind me and Maddy pokes her head from her room. “Are you ready to feed the animals?”

  “Yes!” Her eyes shine, but as she walks past Sterling’s door, she slows down. “Daddy’s in pain.” She looks at me. “He hurts. But not on the outside, on the inside, in his heart.” She touches her chest, pointing at the general direction of her heart with a finger.

  I swallow hard, taking her hand and going down the stairs. “Yes, and that’s why we’re going to help him all that we can. So the pain goes away a little.”

  She nods with a serious look on her face. “I’ll always help and protect Daddy.” I know she’s small, but if she’s anything like her dad or her aunt, I don’t doubt for one moment that she’d do it.

  In the kitchen, Maddy puts on her rain boots and I take a quick look at my totally insufficient shoes. “Maddy, which shoes are your dad’s?” I remember having the same shoe size as Logan, made living together so much easier.

  She points to a big black pair, sticking out from all the other more colourful pairs.

  “Is it okay if I borrow them?” I don’t want to upset her by just taking them.

  She nods. “He isn’t going to use them anymore anyway.” She looks absolutely serious and I feel a jab in my chest. Fuck. How am I going to survive this? Her eyes go up to me, tears forming. “That’s sad, right? It makes me sad.”

  I kneel down, taking the little girl in my arms, my own tears no longer able to be pushed away. “Yes. Yes, it is.”

  How can I stay and care for Sterling and Maddy? Especially with all the secrets I’m keeping from them?

  At the same time… How can I leave them? How can I leave these beautiful people all on their own?

  They need me.

  I need them. More than they’ll ever know.

  To Be Continued

  My Mate’s Mark

  Second Chance Mates 2

  1. Sterling

  It’s not until I hear Wilder and my daughter Maddy’s voices outside in the garden that I sit up and try to get out of bed. I’ve got a little time on my own, so I should use it. My legs aren’t very strong both from exhaustions and being in heat, but that doesn’t matter, the bathroom isn’t very far. I grab the doorknob and keep holding onto it until my head stops swimming. Exhaustion, on multiple levels, is not a way to treat my body, especially not when I’m weak from being in heat. My clothes are still on the floor where I left them last night.

  Last night…

  I check myself in the mirror, reaching up with one hand and running my fingers over the new mark, the mark that Wilder left on the back where my shoulder and my neck meet. It’s still tender, and I can feel where the blood has dried, the edges of the mark rough and hard. Then I move my hand, touching the mark on the other side, running my fingers over the small indents that Logan’s teeth left behind all those years ago. Getting marked once is normal for an Omega, but twice? I don’t know anyone else this has happened to and to be honest, I haven’t ever heard of this happening to anyone before.

  I hunt around in the medicine cabinet and grab some bandages. I can’t have the mark open like this, not just because it still needs healing, but also because there is no way people who’d see it would understand. I wince as I try to place the bandage correctly, but even though it looks a little weird, I know that people won’t immediately guess what’s under it.

  Like my situation wasn’t pitiful enough when I met Logan, being a virgin and an unmated Omega at twenty-five and all, the only thing worse would have been if I hadn’t stayed a virgin for all that time. But now... A widower, a father and mated by another Alpha... I don’t think people will understand. There is no luck for me in this world. I should have learnt to live with that a long time ago.

  Looking around the bathroom, I grab the dirty clothes and dump them in the laundry basket, then I stumble as I make my way back into the bedroom, only just able to grab hold onto the dresser. I take a pair of underwear, a T-shirt and some loose fitting sweats from the dresser and put them on. Then I climb back into bed. There is no use for me to try to walk around, not with the state my body is in. The exhaustion is both mentally and physically. I guess it wouldn’t have been that bad if I’d actually gotten any sleep last night. But with everything going on, that wasn’t an option. Sleeping in this bed, the bed that I shared with Logan, in the room that I shared with Logan... My brain just keeps going to bad places, and no matter how hard I try, I can’t push all the memories away. I can’t push away this deep pain of being alone now.

  Downstairs, Maddy and Wilder are coming back into the house. It’s strange, this is the first time in as long as I can remember that I haven’t fed the animals in the morning. Even when Logan and I had pet rabbits, I’d always be the one up first and feed the little fuzzy creatures. I’m not used to this, this not having to be the provider, not having to be the carer of everyone. Being the one who is cared for, that’s a whole new experience. Another new experience on top of so many other experiences. I think I’m done with the new experience thing for a while though.

  Hearing them putter around downstairs, it’s soothing, and while I can’t seem to get any real sleep, at least I’m getting some rest for now. Staying in bed, trying to get as much rest as I can, it brings back memories that I’d long since forgotten. The last time I was stuck in bed like this, with someone caring for me, was when I had my last heat, nine months before Maddy was born.

  I’ve never enjoyed being in heat. My parents always said that I was too independent for an Omega, too independent to be able to be relied on to be a good carer. They just couldn’t understand why I wasn’t ecstatic each time I went into heat, why I wasn’t looking forward to each time. Even my Omega father didn’t get it. He just couldn’t grasp why I hated being in heat. But being in heat just reminded me too much of why people always looked down on me, on Omegas. Every couple of months, I’m locked in the house for a week, not able to do anything, wholly dependent on other people. For me, it’s never been about being fertile, for me, being in heat has always been a sign of why people were so dismissive of Omegas. Dismissive because we’re so weak that when we’re able to get pregnant, our whole body overloads and puts us out of commission for a week.

  And then the heat itself. I’m not usually one to stand out, but when I’m in heat, all eyes are on me. No matter who it is. First I saw it in my parents, in the way that my mother would react differently to my
father, just because he was in heat. And he went into heat every time he could, even though I’m an only kid. My parents were never able to have more children, but it wasn’t for lack of trying… Then I saw it in my friends, their eyes on me were different, they would both fight their own urges not to jump me and also fight other people away from me. There was nothing so scary as to see them fight to make sure I wasn’t mated before I got out of high school. They knew how much it hurt for me to see them like that, but they’d still come around, and they were still my friends. They never gave up. To them, I was a friend, and that meant a lot to me.

  But, until I met Logan, I had no idea what kind of real pain my heat could bring to others. I’d never been very fond of it, but to see his eyes glaze over, to see him disappear and only this lust filled husk come up in front of me. That was scary that first time. The way I reacted? The way my body reacted to him? That was new too. Before, I’d only seen glimmers of it with my parents, but to experience the full effect that my heat would have when my true mate was around, I wasn’t ready for that. I wasn’t ready for any of it.

  I let a tear slip. Logan.

  There are sounds in the hallway downstairs and then Maddy’s voice floating up the stairs, followed by Wilder’s lower voice. “Careful Maddy, don’t let it drop.”

  “I won’t. I won’t.” She sounds so sure of herself, and I can imagine the way she’s looking at him right now.

  I wipe away my tears, I don’t want her to see me cry like this. I wait for the knocking on the door.

  “Daddy? Breakfast service.”

  I hear a knock too, but it’s too loud to be hers.

  “Come on in.” I push myself up a little so I’m sitting instead of being all huddled under the blankets.

  The door opens, and Maddy comes in, in her hands a tray with a stack of pancakes and some orange juice, she makes her way over to the bed, sliding the tray carefully onto my lap. Then she returns to Wilder, who gives her a mug, and the way she carefully holds it makes me think it’s probably coffee. I meet his eyes for a moment, and he inclines his head a little before he steps away from the door and goes back down the stairs, leaving us in peace.