I drop my head and push my hands through my hair, letting out a loud howl of frustration because I have no fucking idea what’s going on here. It just feels like everything’s turning to crap, it’s all changing, and if I lose her…
Looking back up at the screen she’s alone in the room now, and I’ve never leapt out of a chair so fast in my life, but I’m gonna find that bastard. I’m gonna find out who the hell he is and what he is to her, because I’m not losing her. She isn’t leaving my life, not for anyone, I don’t care who the fuck they are.
I’m out of that room and out of my office, and I’m working on some kind of auto-pilot here because all I can see is a red mist that refuses to budge. I don’t know where he’s gone, but I’m gonna fucking find him.
‘You seen a guy leave the club just now, Alan? Tall, I think his hair’s a dark blonde, maybe light brown…’
‘Been a few guys left the place, Neal. And even more coming in, you know how it is. You could ask Trey on the door, see if he’s…’
I’m not listening anymore. Alan’s obviously seen nothing, he’s no use to me. But I’m gonna assume this man has left the club, and he can’t have gone far, I only saw him leave a few minutes ago. Unless he got straight into a cab – shit!
I push my way through the crowd gathered at the entrance, out on to the street, and then I stop and take a second to look around me, a few brief beats just to try and get my head together. But that anger and rage is still pent up and desperate to be vented. I need to know who the fuck he is.
But when I spot him, sitting on a low wall across the street from the club, I suddenly don’t know what to do. And then he drops his head into his hands, down between his knees and I frown. I’m confused, but then the anger surges forward again and I don’t even know who that anger is aimed at now – Kira, or him. But he’s a threat, to me, to what I’ve only just found with Kira. And I’m not prepared for anyone to take her from me, not now. No one is gonna get to do that while I still have breath left in my fucked-up body.
I stride across the street, dodging the late night traffic, the sound of horns going off and shouts from cab windows not even registering in my brain as I make my way towards this stranger. But he’s a stranger who, not ten minutes ago, had his hand between my girlfriend’s legs while he kissed her in a way that told me he was no client, ex or otherwise. He’s more to her than that, and I need to know what’s going on here.
‘Next time you touch her, you ask first, OK?’
He slowly raises his head and a smirk immediately crosses his face. ‘Sorry, mate, have I done something to upset you?’ He stands up, digging his hands in his pockets, his dark eyes hard and determined as he stares me down, but he doesn’t intimidate me. I’m way past that. ‘Only, I’m getting a bit of a negative vibe from you here.’
‘You’re not welcome in that club – my club. D’you hear me? You’re not welcome in there.’
‘She owns that club, too, doesn’t she? I mean, it doesn’t just belong to you, does it?’
‘I don’t know who you are, but I know what you’re doing. With Kira. I know.’
He holds up his hands and takes a step back, but he’s still smirking, and my anger isn’t subsiding any.
‘You want me to walk away?’
‘I want you to walk away.’
He shakes his head and steps forward, invading my space just a little too much. ‘Can’t do that, mate. You see, that girl of yours, she belongs to me. And I will do anything – anything – I have to do to get her back.’
I laugh in his face, but even that doesn’t wipe away the smirk, and I am this fucking close to laying him out. Every inch of me wants to smash my hand through his ribs and rip his beating heart right out of his body. ‘Who are you to her, huh?’
He steps back again, and that smirk grows wider as he digs his hands back into his pockets. ‘I’m the man she wanted to marry.’
My frown deepens. The man she wanted to marry?
‘Look, I’m not the one who…’ He pushes a hand through his hair and for a brief second I see a flicker of something that makes me real nervous about his presence. I see something that tells me he cares for Kira more than I want him to. ‘I’m not him, OK? I’m not Simon.’
‘Then who are you?’
‘The man who loved her for too long. That’s who I am. Look, when that bastard did what he did to her, he didn’t just kill her. When he raped her, he killed what we had, too. He killed us. He ripped away our chance, and I’ve lived with that regret for so many years, but now – now I need her. And I didn’t come all this way to lose this fight, I am gonna win, so you better be ready. OK? You better be ready to fight for her because I’m not leaving without her.’
I can’t get the words out. I want to say something, I want to strike right back at him with threats of my own but I can’t get the words out. He knows about the rape? She told me only me and Joey knew... How many more secrets is she hiding? How many more lies has she told? I can’t get my head around this…
And then he turns and walks away without me having had a chance to fight my corner, but if he thinks I’m taking that crap, he’s wrong. He underestimates what me and Kira have... Shit!
I let out an almost strangled cry of frustration as I take his place on the wall, dropping my own head into my hands, and I rake them through my hair in an almost manic manner.
She wanted to marry him.
I want to marry her.
And I don’t know when this started to be so fucking hard but whatever’s going on here, no one is taking her from me.
No one.
She has a past I don’t understand.
I want to give her a future that’ll keep her safe and make her happy.
So no one is taking her from me.
Kira
I pull off the wig and shake out my hair, looking at my reflection in the full-length mirror. I look like the weak, pathetic woman I am and I can’t be her. So I take a deep breath and drop the robe, staring at my naked body; a body that’s earned me a lot of money. A body that made me the woman I need to be. Is this all I really have left now?
‘Something you want to tell me?’
I swing around to see Neal standing in the doorway, and I start to move but he shakes his head, closing the door behind him.
‘Stay where you are.’
I turn back to face the mirror as he comes up behind me, his arm circling my waist, his lips brushing over my shoulder as his hand rests on my stomach.
‘Who is he, Kira?’
I reach up behind me and wind my fingers in his hair, leaning back against him as his kisses reach my neck. How does he know? What does he know? And why aren’t I feeling even the slightest hint of panic at this?
‘Who is he?’
He repeats the question, and I don’t know how he knows – a part of me doesn’t want to – but it isn’t something I can walk away from now. This mess has caught up with me. I can’t run anymore.
‘The only man I ever loved,’ I whisper, my fingers clenching in his hair. ‘Until you.’
His hand presses harder against my stomach, his mouth now trailing across my neck and I close my eyes as our fingers thread together.
‘What’s he doing here?’
‘He’s come for me.’
‘Do you want to go?’
I turn around in his arms and his mouth crashes down onto mine so hard I let out a little yelp of pain, but we don’t stop. I’m wrapped around him and up against the wall before either of us can catch our breath, and he’s inside me, pounding into me with such force each thrust slams me back into the wall. He’s taking all his frustration out on me, but he needs to do that. I’m doing it, too. My nails are digging into his flesh, scratching his skin as he continues to fuck me hard and fast, until we both come in a torrent of cries that verge on animalistic; primal, even. But, oh, God, did we need that release!
I keep my legs wrapped around him as we try to catch our breath, my face buried in his shoulder as he h
olds me tight.
‘I need to know, Kira.’
He pulls back and looks at me. And he’s right. He does.
‘I need to know everything.’
Twenty-Four
Neal
We had to get out of New York. Just for a little while. I haven’t been to my place in Vegas for too long, and she’s always wanted to go there, so, we’re here. In Vegas. We’re putting a bit of space between us and everything that’s slowly killing us. We need some time alone. Completely alone. When we’re alone everything is perfect. When we start to let the real world in, crap happens.
I’ve told my lawyer to talk to Barry, to tell him to put his ridiculous shit to one side for now. I’ll deal with him when I get back. All I want to do is concentrate on Kira. On us.
I spit the last of the toothpaste out into the sink and head back into the bedroom, but I stop in the doorway for a few seconds first. I just want to look at her. My beautiful girl. My whole world. She’s going nowhere.
I watch as she moves slightly, and the sheet shifts, falling below her thighs and I feel my cock react so quickly it actually sucks the breath right out of me. I want her, as I do every day. Every hour. Every second, I want her. Does he want her like I do? Does it feel the same for him, as it does for me? Does he feel that same, painful desperation that lives within my soul?
I slide back into bed beside her and lean over to kiss her slightly open mouth, drinking in her tiny moan of pleasure as her eyes flicker open. And she smiles, and I feel like a million fireworks have just shot off in a hundred different directions inside of me.
‘Is that all I get?’ she whispers, and I return her smile, pulling her over on to her side so she faces me. ‘You’re slacking, Cannon.’
‘Maybe I need teaching a lesson, huh?’
She laughs quietly, a deep, throaty laugh that comes from the pit of her diaphragm, and it’s so fucking sexy my cock’s out of control! It wants inside her, but I’m guessing she wants a bit more than a quick fuck here. ‘Does Madame Blu need to pay you a visit?’
Oh, Jesus, coming to Vegas was such a great idea. All we’ve done since we got here three days ago is fuck and laugh and escape back into our own, private world. We’re not thinking about anything else except us. How long that’s gonna last, I don’t know. I just hope it lasts for a little while longer. I really don’t want to have to face whatever reality is waiting for us out there, not just yet. Because it scares me. And I suddenly realise she isn’t the only one running now. I’m running just as fast.
‘Maybe she does. She know where we are?’ I murmur, my mouth resting against hers as her hand snakes around my hip, her fingers fanning out against it.
‘She always knows where we are, handsome.’
I fall on to my back and pull her over so she straddles me, and I try to push that man – Jon, I think she told me his name was – I try to push him to the back of my mind but I get the feeling he isn’t gonna go away. Not any time soon. But I won’t let him get to me. He isn’t gonna distract me from why we came here. But there’s something in the back of my mind that can’t help wondering how much she’s thinking about him.
She told me everything. Everything he’d meant to her, their entire history, and hearing those words, it made me feel sick, I can’t lie. She loved him. He loved her. A forbidden love. A secret love. She told me they couldn’t ever really be together, not back then, but now… He became her client, she continued to see him, right up until I walked into her life she was still seeing him. She only stopped a short time before we met. So can I really expect her to be over him? Completely? When just a few months ago they were still trying everything they could to snatch even the most sordid of time together?
‘Don’t, Neal.’
She leans right over, arching her back and I slide my hand into the small of it, feeling her warm skin against my palm.
‘Don’t think about it. Please.’
‘Do you think about it, Kira? About him?’
She kisses me, and I feel her tits brush my chest and my cock is still working on its own here. It wouldn’t matter what I wanted, it’s going in regardless.
‘He’s there, in the back of my mind, yes. I didn’t expect him to find me again, but…’ She sits up and raises her hips slightly, taking me in her hand as she carefully guides my eager cock inside her, lowering herself back down and I groan quietly as I feel myself sink into her. She’s warm and soft and so wet, and I freaking love it, inside her. ‘He found me. And yes, I think about him.’ She leans forward again, clenching her inner muscles tight to keep me inside her. ‘ But I think about you more.’
‘That right?’ I grin, holding her hips as she grinds against me and I pull my legs up a little to steady her. She thinks about me more. But that still means I have to share her. I never really did have her all to myself. But even though she lied to me; kept secrets from me, it’s OK. I can handle that. I just can’t handle losing her, so no matter what it takes she’s staying, with me.
‘That’s right,’ she breathes as she sits up and leans back against my legs, stretching out as she continues to grind her beautiful body on to mine. And I watch as she opens her legs a touch wider, and I can see everything; see myself disappearing inside her and it’s my favourite fucking view, man, I could watch this forever.
So I try to put him to one side, and concentrate on the fact that it’s me she’s fucking. It’s me she’s straddling. It’s my cock inside her, not his. But does she want him? Is she gonna tell me, if she does? Or is she just gonna have him, without me knowing? Christ, I hadn’t even had that down as an option, until now.
‘You’re doing it again,’ she says, leaning back over me, her long hair sweeping across my face and I tuck a few strands back behind her ear as she kisses me.
‘Do you want to sleep with him?’
She stills; her whole body freezes, and I don’t know what to feel now. I don’t know what I’ve done. I don’t even know whether I meant to say those words out loud or not.
‘I need to know, Kira.’
I’ve tried, to not think about this, and for three days I’ve almost managed it. But now I need to know. I need to know a lot of things. I need to know too much, but it’s like every day I’m finding out something I didn’t know about her; some secret, some revelation about her past and it really fucking scares me.
‘I need to know, baby.’
She doesn’t say anything, but her eyes won’t leave mine. And then she starts to move again, and her inner muscles resume their tight grip on my cock – how the fuck does she do that?
She wants me to come, and she wants me to come quickly, and she’s gonna get her wish because I can’t hold on any longer – Jesus!
She won’t let up; she’s grinding and gripping, slamming down onto me as I come in sharp, heavy bursts, so many of them it’s freaking draining me! There’s nothing left. I am done. I’m fucking done.
I close my eyes, breathing in deep as I try to pull myself together, but they open again the second I feel her climb off me and I sit up, watching as she pulls on a T-shirt, covering that crazy-beautiful body.
‘Why did you bring him up, Neal?’
She walks over to the window and folds her arms against herself as she looks outside. She can’t look at me, and the whole atmosphere’s changed. I’ve let that reality back in, and we’re gonna have to face it now.
‘Because he isn’t gonna go away, Kira.’
And I’m right. He isn’t. I thought coming here would help but I think I’m wrong about that.
I get up and pull on my jeans before I go over to her, letting my hand fall on to her hip as I lean in to gently kiss her neck.
‘We have to talk about this, baby.’
She can’t run anymore. She’s hit a dead-end; we both have. And I think she knows that just as much as I do.
‘Do you want to sleep with him, Kira? When he touched you; when he kissed you, did that reignite all those feelings you’re trying to pretend you don’t have for
him anymore…?’
She turns around, and her eyes are wide and angry but at least I’m getting some kind of reaction. ‘You don’t know what I’m feeling.’
‘I know you haven’t stopped thinking about him since we left New York.’
I don’t know that, actually, but her expression tells me I’m right. She left a part of herself back in Manhattan, with him. Because he’ll still be there, waiting for her to come home, of that I have no doubt. And I have no idea how to compete with a man who’s known her since she was fifteen years old. I don’t know if I can, but I have to. Because I won’t lose her.
Obsession (Forbidden #2) Page 24
