Cocked And Loaded (Lucas Brothers Book 4)

by Jordan Marie

  “That’s just it, I don’t know. So why don’t you explain it to me. I don’t see how you couldn’t rent it to me. You’ve known me my whole life, Mrs. Hill. I’m a cop for Christ’s sake. It’s not like I’m going to bring drugs and parties into the house every night.”

  “I realize we know each other and honestly I thought you were one of the good brothers of that clan.”

  “Hold up, one of the good brothers?”

  “Yeah. Lord knows the devil is going to come calling one day for that brother, Cyan, of yours and I’m not too sure about Gray, though he seems to have calmed down since he met that woman.”

  “Are you telling me I didn’t get the place because of what you think about my family?” I ask, pissed as hell.

  “Of course not. I’m not that type of person. You didn’t get the place because your last landlord said you left the place so bad he couldn’t rent it out. He’s in the middle of having to pay contractors to come fix it all.”

  “My last landlord…”

  I got a sick feeling in my gut. I hold my head down, and close my eyes.

  “He was a very nice gentleman too. I can’t believe you left the place in such a mess.”

  “Mrs. Hill I haven’t lived there in a year. My ex has. I was just there a few weeks ago and the place was fine.”

  “Well, it’s not now. He sent me pictures. There’s holes in the wall, stains on the carpet and it looked like you let the bathtub overflow and water stand on the floor for days. Poor man has to replace all of it. I don’t know what kind of crazy parties you throw, but I refuse to let you do that to my home.”

  “I haven’t been there to throw a damn party!” I growl.

  “I will not have you talking to me like this!” she gasps.

  “I—”

  I stop because a dial tone rings in my ear.

  My hand chokes up on the phone in anger and frustration.

  “I don’t want your damn place anyway, you old biddy!” I growl to no one, hitting the button to turn the phone off and tossing it on the bed.

  “What’s got your tits all twisted?”

  I look up to see my mother standing in the doorway.

  “I had the door closed for a reason, Mom.”

  “My house, I can open any door I want.”

  “Well, if I could manage to find another place to live that wouldn’t be an issue.”

  “You really are Mr. Grumpy Drawers today aren’t you?”

  “Linda’s at it again. Apparently she demolished my old apartment and because she was only sub-leasing and the original lease was in my name, I’m getting the fallout.”

  “That woman needs a come to Jesus moment…or the broad side of a 2x4 to knock some sense into her head.”

  “I think that’s a hopeless cause,” I mutter, falling back on the bed. I’ve barely been asleep and now I can feel a headache steadily building.

  “Probably so. That gal was always one acorn short of a squirrel’s mouthful.”

  “I don’t understand why I didn’t see it. I can’t understand why my tastes are so far off when it comes to women,” I moan—more to myself than my mother. I’m just disgusted with everything, the apartment, Linda, not being able to find Kong… but mostly myself. It’s clear that I can’t be trusted when it comes to women.

  Mom sits down on the bed beside me, her hand on my leg and I sit back up. I almost feel like a kid again, but at least right now it’s not in a bad way. Mom brings comfort and I might be a grown man, but right now comfort is appreciated.

  “It’s not your judgment that’s off, son.”

  “Can’t prove that by Linda. She was clearly a bad choice.”

  “Pfft… you didn’t even like Linda, your willy did.”

  “Oh God, Mom.”

  “Well, it’s true and you might as well own up to it. Men let their willies do the thinking way too often. Linda was what I like to call a cotton candy vacuum.”

  “A what?”

  “She opens her legs and sucks a man inside—”

  “Christ, I can’t—”

  “Don’t go getting shy on me. It’s true. She sucks a man inside and it’s all sweet and light, so good a man thinks he found heaven.”

  “I may be an idiot, but I don’t think I ever thought I found heaven with Linda.”

  “Well you might not have but the part that was in charge at the time did. There had to be a reason you kept her around, so are you going to be stupid enough now to deny it?”

  “I guess not,” I answer feeling dejected.

  “But you know what happens to cotton candy when you take it out and try to keep it.”

  “I’m afraid to ask…”

  “It dissolves into a shriveled mess that ants and other disgusting creatures infest.”

  “Jesus…”

  “Speaking of which, did you ever get your willy checked after your break-up with that she-wolf?”

  “I was never with Linda without protection, Mom.”

  “Some of that shit can eat through whatever it is you cover your crayon with boy.”

  “I got checked too, after I found out she was screwing my captain. My crayon is fine… just inherently stupid.”

  “Good to know—”

  Before she can go off on another of her tangents the phone rings.

  “Saved by the bell,” I joke.

  “Smart ass. I never spanked you enough as a kid.”

  “Hello,” I answer, laughing at Mom.

  “Hey Black,” Addie says into the phone. My heart kicks against my chest. God I love her voice. She makes my palms sweaty and my heart race like I was a young kid. Right now, however, I feel panic. The conversation with Mom and Mrs. Hill comes back to me all at once and it feels like my skin is itching everywhere. What if I’m just letting my dick think for me again? I’ve got so much trouble coming at me from Linda, I really can’t afford to be wrong with Addie…

  “Hey, Addie. How are you?”

  “I’m good. I was wondering if we’re still on for tonight?”

  Shit. I was hoping to take Addie to my new apartment. That’s clearly not going to happen, but now I’m worried. I need to think about this before I make another mistake…

  “I’m sorry Addie, I was just about to call you,” I lie. “I got called into work tonight.”

  “What? I thought Luka gave you the night—”

  “He was going to, but Daniel got sick and couldn’t fill in. So I’m going to be busy.”

  “Oh… Well maybe I could meet you for dinner again?” she asks.

  Guilt hits me, as well as indecision. My mother is standing now, looking down at me with a disgusted look on her face.

  “I probably shouldn’t tonight. I have a lot of paperwork to get through and things.”

  “Oh… Okay then,” she says, sounding unsure.

  Inside my head is screaming at me to stop pulling away, to stop sending Addie mixed signals and just admit what’s going through my head.

  “I’ll call you tomorrow, Addie I promise,” I tell her. If I take today to get my head straight, then I’ll know what to do about Addie… I just need another day to think.

  “Only if you want to. Goodbye, Black,” she says and that sounds way too final. Panic of another sort hits me.

  “Addie—” It’s too late because she’s disconnected.

  “I swear I think you have shit for brains, Black Horn,” Mom tells me as I put the phone down.

  “I just—”

  “You’re just fucking up. I swear I thought I raised smarter boys but each one of you just seems to get dumber and dumber when it comes to women. Lord only knows the hell I’m going to face by the time Blue pulls his head out of his ass when it comes to Meadow. I thought you might have at least been a little smarter by this time. Do you care for Orchid or not?”

  “Her name is Addie.”

  “Don’t get smart with me, Black Horn. It might take some work, but I could manage to spank that ass of yours raw and not in the kinky way your brothe
r seems to enjoy while thinking I don’t know a thing about it.”

  “Uh—”

  “I didn’t stutter. Do you like my Orchid or not?”

  “Well yeah, but what if—”

  “There’s no what if, son. If you like her, you have only one decision.”

  “What’s that?” I ask.

  “You are going to have to shit or get off the pot,” she says matter-of-factly.

  We stare at each other for a few minutes. I rub the back of my neck at the tension I feel there. Mom finally shakes her head at me, clearly disgusted and walks out of the room.

  I fall back on the bed, feeling just as disgusted.

  Mom’s right in her oh so eloquent way. I’m either going to have to go all in, or walk away…

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Addie

  “I’m telling you, if you’re going to get my son’s head out of his ass, you’re going to have to bring out the big guns,” Ida Sue says and I throw my head back against the seat of my car and close my eyes. She’s been calling me for days.

  Days!

  And that’s because Black hasn’t. I haven’t heard from Black in a week. I gave him a week and I’m tired of waiting. I don’t feel like I need to chase after Black. He’s made his decision. I know he had the night off. Petal and Luka both told me.

  He lied.

  I don’t have a lot of experience with men, but I know enough to know that if they lie to you to get out of a date, then you’re not wanted. Which is fine. It really is. It hurt like hell the last week, but I think I’m getting better. The last thing I want to do is listen to Ida Sue and Petal on how to make Black jealous.

  “I love you, Ida Sue, I truly do. But, I’m not going to try and get Black’s attention and I’m definitely not going to try and make him jealous.”

  “You’re not?” she asks, and her voice is strange, almost as if she’s studying me. It makes me uncomfortable for a minute before I shrug it off as my imagination.

  “Absolutely not. Besides he’s the one that pushed me away, I doubt very seriously I could make him jealous.”

  “I see…”

  “What do you see?” I ask, just as I see the realtor pull up.

  “You’re afraid. I can understand that, Orchid. I just thought you were made of stronger stuff.”

  “Now you’re just being crazy! I’m not scared. I just refuse to throw myself at someone who doesn’t want me!”

  “I see,” she says again and those two words are really beginning to piss me off.

  “I don’t think you do and just so you know I don’t think your son deserves me. I’m a good person and a good woman! I don’t need someone to make me feel like I’m not worth his time!”

  “You should tell him that,” she says helpfully, sounding cheerful.

  “I might, but I doubt I will ever talk to him again. Now if you excuse me I need to go. The Realtor is standing out by the building waiting for me.”

  “You found a place?”

  “Yeah over on North Street.”

  “Oh that’s—”

  “Don’t bother telling me I shouldn’t live there. There’s not a lot of places in Mason, at least in my budget and I’ve heard it all from my own father. If I didn’t listen to him, I don’t see me listening to you.”

  “I wasn’t going to say that dear.”

  “You weren’t?” I asked and I’m surprised to say the least.

  “No, of course not. Actually, I think it’s good you’re not willing to play games to get Black’s attention. To be honest I’m not sure you two are well matched,” she says and I should be glad she’s given up, but instead I feel sick to my stomach.

  “You don’t?” I ask, and I really wish my voice would have come out stronger.

  “No. You’re obviously two very different people. Anyway! Happy apartment looking. I hope you find one you love!”

  “I really don’t care at this point. It will just be nice not to live in a hotel—especially since my dad has decided to build a new house.”

  “I understand that! Well bye, Orchid! I have some things I need to do.”

  Just like that she’s gone. I stare at my phone in shock. Ida Sue has been calling me every day for almost a week and not just once a day, but sometimes as many as three times a day. When she’s not calling, Petal or CC is. Heck even Luka and Gray called once. Then, almost as if by magic, Ida Sue just hangs up and gives up.

  I don’t get it.

  It doesn’t matter. She’s finally realized what I have come to realize this week. There is no possible relationship between me and Black. It’s time I move on.

  And that starts with getting my own place.

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Addie

  “Damn it!”

  “Is something wrong?”

  I look around to see who asked the question, putting my hand on my forehead and using it as a visor over my eyes, because the sun is blinding me. I had forgotten how bright and hot the Texas sun is. I hear footsteps and finally a woman comes into view. It takes me a minute to place her—but, I finally recognize her as the woman I spoke to about the velvet dress.

  “Oh! Hi,” I say, flustered.

  “Hi! Can’t believe I ran into you again. It’s a small world!”

  “Well Mason is kind of small… Lynn right?”

  “Yep and you’re Addie, right?”

  “Right,” I laugh.

  Lynn looks down at my car and immediately sees why I’m having such a bad day.

  “Oh no. What happened?”

  “I don’t know. My tire was fine when I went into the store, but I came out and it’s flat as a pancake. I called the garage, but it’s early and they don’t open for another hour. I hate to call Dad, but I guess I’ll have to. I just bought groceries and they’ll ruin if I don’t get them out of the heat.”

  “You don’t have a spare?” Lynn asks and this is the part that makes me feel more like a dummy.

  “Don’t think less of me, but I doubt I could change a flat if my life depended on it. So much for being an adult and trying to stand on my own two feet. I mean I could try, but I think it might be safer to call the garage.”

  “Don’t feel bad. I can’t change them either. What about that guy you said you met? Couldn’t he come help a damsel in distress out?”

  “We’re no longer dating,” I announce, hating how the words make me feel. I see the surprise on her face. Why wouldn’t she be? It wasn’t that long ago I was shopping for clothes to impress the asshole.

  “I’m sorry. Well, I tell you what. I can’t help with the tire, but I can give you a ride to your house to put your groceries up and then to the garage if you want?”

  I look at her. It’s a kind offer. I don’t really know her. I could and probably should call Petal or Ida Sue, but I don’t trust them not to call Black. I don’t want his help. I don’t need him in my life—especially since he doesn’t want to be there.

  “I’m safe I promise, I can give you my name and you can google it. No outstanding warrants, no charges for kidnapping and torturing, or even murder,” she jokes and I feel bad that she could see the indecision on my face.

  “I’d really like a ride, Lynn.”

  “Great! I don’t have any friends here yet and the apartment I thought I had rented was leased out from under me. I’m staying in a hotel and thinking about moving on down the road. I’m not sure Mason is for me.”

  “There’s an apartment in my complex for rent. I just moved in actually. Of course, it’s not in the best of neighborhoods. The rent is dirt cheap though.”

  “Dirt cheap—you said the magic words!” she laughs. “Here I’ll help you get your groceries loaded in my car. I’m in the black Maxima over there.”

  “I’m so glad you came by when you did,” I tell her, grabbing a couple of the bags with her and walking to her car.

  “I like moving around early. It’s the best part of the day,” Lynn answers.

  “I’m the same way,” I laugh
.

  “See? We’re meant to be friends!”

  I smile at Lynn’s words. They’re more than welcomed. I need a friend…one away from Black, especially since he seems to be all I can think about.

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Black

  “Well you look like a sad sack of shit,” Luka says coming in. It’s barely eight in the morning and about the only thing stirring is the local store which is open practically 24/7 and me… and now Luka. Mason’s streets don’t usually get popping until nine or ten. Everything moves at a slower pace out here. It’s completely different than Dallas… or hell anywhere else that I’ve been.

  “No sleep will do that to you. You here to stay? If so I’ll load my crap up and get out of here.”

  God. I’m sounding as grumpy as Luka used to before Petal came back into his life. I’ve got to snap out of it, the problem is I don’t think I can. I haven’t heard from Addie in a week. I’ve picked up the phone a million times to call her and every time I do a vision of Linda floats through my head and I lose my nerve. Luka is right. I am a sad sack of shit.

  “I’m in for the day. I had to drop River off early at school for a field trip today.”

  “How is school and—”

  “The principal is transferring. Word is your sister will be taking over the position.”

  “I bet that makes the secretary sad,” I joke.

  “She’s gone. The board fired her last week—probably because the principal’s wife was on the board.”

  “Probably. That wasn’t his smartest move. I wonder where the horny bastard is transferring too?”

  “Word is his wife kicked him out of the house so if I had to guess… I’d say out of the Mason district.”

  “Awe love. Fucked up as ever,” I sigh. “I’m out of here.”

  “That’s not love Black. What you had with Linda wasn’t either,” Luka says just as I’m about to open the door to leave.

  “I didn’t mean it was,” I mumble, not turning around. I didn’t really think that either. I’m fucked up, but I know I was never in love with Linda. “I know what I had with her and it was nowhere in that ballpark, Luka.”