Sex Symbol

by Tracey H. Kitts

He must have sensed when I couldn’t take it anymore and lowered me to the floor of the walk-in shower. He spread my legs wide, running his tongue over my pussy again before thrusting into me with complete abandon. Yes. This was what I wanted.

  I wrapped my legs around him, lifting up to meet his thrusts as he moved harder and faster. I came again and he still didn’t stop. Just when I thought Eramus might pound me right through the tile, he cried out with release.

  We lay there on the shower floor for several minutes. Water splashed over his shoulders and down into my face as he lifted up.

  “Are you all right? Did I hurt you?”

  I smiled. “No. I’m fine.”

  We finished our shower and when I stepped out Eramus wrapped me in a towel, pulling me against him. I snuggled my face against the soft hair on his chest. I wanted so much to enjoy the moment, but there was something I really needed to talk with him about.

  “I know this is shitty timing, but I really need to talk to you,” I said softly.

  “I know. Let’s build a fire first. We didn’t have time earlier for—a lot of things. I promised I’d make it up to you, remember?”

  “Yeah, but…”

  “I’ll tell you everything I know,” he added softly. “I just want to enjoy being with you for a while, and see if we can figure a way out of this mess.”

  Eramus built a fire in the small hearth in my bedroom. He left me sitting there on a blanket, wrapped tightly in my bathrobe, while he went downstairs to get some wine.

  I waited ’til he’d poured us both a glass before I asked him the same burning question I’d asked Crazy Wolf. “Am I going to turn into a werewolf?”

  “If you did, it would defeat the purpose of giving the mark.”

  “What does that mean?”

  “You have been altered by his blood, but not enough to turn you. For someone not compatible with werewolf DNA, it would have had no effect at all. However, even those slight changes are enough to make you immune to a regular attack.”

  “Okay, now explain to me exactly what that means.”

  “It means that if Ron had attacked you, your wounds would have healed at an accelerated rate, just like a werewolf. But you wouldn’t grow paws at the next full moon.”

  “So why would someone give their ‘mate’ their blood if it wouldn’t turn them? Don’t they want to be with someone like themselves?”

  Eramus’ expression was very serious. He appeared to be choosing his words carefully, which made me worry even more.

  “Female werewolves are barren. The whole reason to give someone the mark is to alter them just enough that having sex, no-holds-barred sex, with a werewolf won’t hurt them. And of course, to prevent their transformation. You see, the transformation would make a pregnant woman miscarry. For that reason, female werewolves cannot have children.”

  My voice shook as I asked, “Are you saying that he did this to me so that I could have his babies?”

  “Yes.”

  “Oh my God.”

  I couldn’t breathe. I leaned forward, pressing my forehead to the floor. I was hyperventilating and didn’t know how to stop. A full-blown panic attack had never hit me this hard before. The room was spinning around me and my heart felt as if it was going to pound through my chest.

  Eramus reached for me as I leapt to my feet.

  “I’m going to be sick.”

  That was all I had time to say before running into the bathroom and following through with the threat. To think of all the trouble someone had gone to just to make me do something like that. It was so terrible. And I didn’t even have a choice in the matter. I think that’s the part that pushed me over the edge. No one even asked me if I wanted kids. And now I was expected to have babies with an alpha werewolf?!

  I didn’t even realize that Eramus was in the room until I felt him pull back my hair. He rubbed my back, whispering softly to me. I couldn’t understand what he was saying, but that didn’t matter.

  Once I stopped throwing up, he handed me a cloth to wash my face before going back into the bedroom. After brushing my teeth, I walked out to find him resting back against the pillows on my bed. I knew that he was naked beneath the covers, but it wasn’t his sex I craved. It was simply his nearness.

  I let my robe fall to the floor before slipping underneath the covers and curling against his side. I didn’t realize I was crying until I felt the moisture against my face.

  “I don’t want to have some strange werewolf’s children,” I cried.

  “It’s okay,” Eramus said. He sat up, pulled me onto his lap and started rubbing my back again. “It’s all right. I’m not going to let anything happen to you. No one will touch you except me. I swear it.”

  I lifted up enough to look at him. “Really? You swear?”

  He kissed my forehead and repeated, “I swear.”

  “But don’t I belong to him now? Is there a way to make him reconsider? Whoever the hell he is.”

  “The only way to do that and still save face among his pack is to kill him.”

  “What?”

  “I know you don’t want to hear this, but we’re going to have to wait ’til he shows up first.”

  He was right. I didn’t want to hear that. “And then what?”

  “Then I’ll challenge him for your hand. It’s the only way to ever be free of his hold. No one will challenge my claim to you once he is defeated.”

  My heart was still fluttering wildly and I fought to keep my breathing steady. “But wouldn’t that make you the new leader of the pack?”

  Eramus hugged me close again. “It’s a burden I would gladly bear if it will save you.”

  I wrapped my arms around his neck, burying my face against his throat. “Before, when we were in the shelter, you said you loved me. Do you really?”

  “If there is one good thing about being a wolf it’s the clarity it gives you. You don’t have to doubt or second-guess yourself.” He kissed the top of my head. “And there’s never a need to take back words spoken in the heat of passion, because you know they’re true. Yes, I love you. With all my heart.”

  I went to sleep in his arms that night feeling safer than I had in a long time. That feeling of safety lasted for about two weeks.

  *

  Memories of Eramus tangled in my bed sheets and thoughts of his hard body beneath my hands were a constant distraction. Every time I was alone with him it was as if the rest of the world didn’t exist. The more I thought about everything else that had been happening, the more I longed for those quiet moments.

  I was in the shop making a bouquet with fresh red roses and dreaming of Eramus’ naked body when a familiar face came through the door. The instant he smiled at me I knew who he was and it had nothing to do with his name.

  “Well, well, small world, huh?”

  Maxwell, the man Justina and I had met at Mixer’s a few weeks ago walked up and propped against my counter. He leaned forward enough to smell the roses and sighed. If I didn’t know why he was there, I might have been attracted to him. Besides Eramus, he was one of the sexiest men I’d ever seen. But that didn’t distract me in the slightest. He was dangerous and I needed to find a way to get as far from him as possible.

  “Beautiful,” he said softly. His unnatural green eyes focused on me again and I understood he wasn’t talking about the roses.

  “What can I do for you, Maxwell?”

  His grin widened. “So nice to know you remembered me, and I’m glad you asked.” He reached out and took a strand of my red hair between his fingers, twirling it lightly. I let him. No need to get into a fight over something so simple. Besides, no matter how much my strength might have increased something told me that Maxwell could still kick my ass. If I was going to get out of this I’d have to play nice.

  When he spoke again his voice was just as soft and seductive as it had been that night at the club. But there was no mistaking the underlying threat. “I’m sure you’ve figured out what’s going on by now. I know that y
ou’ve been seeing another wolf, Eramus if I’m not mistaken?”

  He paused and I assumed he was waiting for my answer. “Yes.”

  “Well, I can’t hold that against you, seeing as how you had no idea what I’d done. However…” He leaned in close enough to kiss, but stopped short of actually touching me. “If you refuse to consider my offer, I can hold the deaths of two werewolves against you. One of which was a close friend of mine.”

  “Before you fucked up his life, Ron was a friend of mine too.”

  Maxwell laughed and ran his hand up through the back of my hair. He didn’t pull, but tightened his grip just enough to threaten violence.

  “Think about it, Max. What do you expect me to say? That I appreciate not having my feelings considered? Or maybe that I’ve always wanted to be raped by a werewolf? I can lie to you if you want, ’cause none of that shit is true.”

  Okay, so much for being nice. I just couldn’t seem to help myself. Who the hell did he think he was?

  “I’m not a rapist,” he said softly. “And you will be mine. You have until the thirty-first to consider my offer. Someone will let you know where to find me then. Bring yourself as an answer, or bring your champion if he has the balls to challenge me.”

  To my surprise I growled at him. Not like a wolf exactly, but it sounded vicious and scared the hell out of me.

  “Let go of my hair, Max.”

  He released me and stepped back, holding his hands out in a harmless gesture.

  “I’ll see you on the thirty-first.”

  Eramus missed him by only a few minutes. I couldn’t help but wonder what might have happened if he’d gotten there sooner. I was still standing at the counter when Eramus drove up, staring at the roses, wondering what I should do next.

  “Where’s Justina?” he asked, pushing the door open with his elbow. “I brought you both some coffee.”

  Eramus took a good look at me and hurried to set the coffee down. “What’s wrong? You look pale.”

  “You just missed Maxwell.”

  “Who?”

  “The leader of the pack.”

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Dreams and nightmares

  It surprised me how calmly I was able to repeat what had just happened to Eramus and to Justina, who followed us to the office. I was sitting at the desk, Justina was sitting on top of it sipping coffee and Eramus was pacing the floor.

  “Motherfucker,” Justina said.

  “My thoughts exactly,” Eramus agreed. “He gives us no choice.”

  “What he gives us is two damn days,” I said. “You can’t be serious about this showing up and killing him business.”

  “What else would you suggest?” he asked.

  Justina and I had been talking about everything for the past few weeks so none of this was news to her. However, she decided to offer her support to Eramus.

  “I say kill the fucker. He tried to use my best friend as a sex slave without ever even meeting her.”

  I rolled my eyes. “He had the nerve to act as if I would like it. You know what really pisses me off? Maxwell is good-looking.”

  “What the fuck?” This from Eramus who looked thoroughly confused.

  “Hear me out. He’s an attractive guy. Why would he do something like this to someone unwilling when I’m sure the willing are lining up? It doesn’t make any sense.”

  “The challenge.”

  We all turned to see Crazy Wolf standing in the doorway.

  “He did it for the challenge. You know, to be so smart you really don’t know a damn thing about werewolves.”

  “Wolf, get the fuck out of my office.”

  “Our office,” Justina corrected.

  “Fine, get the fuck out of our office.”

  He raised a brow. “Does that mean you don’t want my support?”

  Okay, now I was confused. “Support for what? This is your fault.”

  Eramus took a step toward him, but to my surprise he didn’t offer violence. “I think I know what he’s trying to say.”

  “I’ve decided which side I’m taking,” Crazy Wolf said. “In a battle for leadership, there are always sides. This is mine.”

  I walked over to Crazy Wolf and slapped him as hard as I could. He took it. And even though Justina gasped, neither she nor Eramus tried to stop me.

  “Don’t ever do anything to me without my permission, understand?”

  This was probably as close as we were going to come to making up. Sad. I really liked Crazy Wolf. His dark eyes held a lot of emotions as he looked down at me, but anger was not one of them.

  “I understand that as the mate of our leader, you can do to me whatever you like.”

  Why did he have to go and say something like that? Every time I got mad enough to hurt him, he made me change my mind.

  “I don’t want to do anything else to you,” I said softly. “And I’m not the mate of your leader. I’ll kill myself before Maxwell touches me.”

  “Jesus,” Justina said from behind me. “Don’t be so dramatic. Besides, Eramus is going to kick his ass. Right?”

  “Absolutely,” Eramus growled.

  *

  Once Eramus and I were alone that night I wasn’t so confident. It wasn’t that I didn’t have faith in him. After all, I’d seen the way he handled Nick. I was afraid. Afraid he would get hurt, afraid I’d get hurt too. My mind wouldn’t stop running through the possibilities. And besides that, I felt sick.

  “It’s your nerves,” Eramus said, handing me a glass of soda. “This should help settle your stomach.”

  I set the soda on the nightstand and crawled into bed. “Aren’t you even a little bit worried?” I asked him. “I feel like an idiot. You’re the one who’s fighting him and I’m getting sick over it. All I’ve got to do is show up.”

  Eramus slipped between the covers and I crawled toward him. His body did more for settling my stomach and my nerves than soda ever could. If I could just be close to him, everything seemed better. He lifted his arm and I snuggled up against his side.

  “If I wasn’t a little worried I’d be stupid. I knew there was a pack here when I moved. But I’ve never heard of Maxwell before. I’m guessing that means he hasn’t been the leader for more than a few years.”

  I looked up at him. “Do you keep up with that sort of thing?”

  “To an extent. It was part of my job for a long time. Now, it just pays to know whose territory I’m in.”

  I hugged him tightly and closed my eyes. I didn’t want to think about what might happen in two days. Maxwell didn’t strike me as the type to play fair. That’s what worried me most. Even if Eramus won, would we make it back alive?

  A few minutes later when I decided to get a sip of the drink he’d brought me, I noticed an empty teacup on the nightstand too.

  “Are you still having trouble sleeping?” I asked.

  He slept better or so it seemed for a few nights after we’d made love for the first time. But now he was back to occasional insomnia.

  “Have I ever told you why I can’t sleep?”

  I snuggled back up to him. “Yeah. You said you have nightmares.”

  “Did I tell you what they’re about?”

  I shook my head.

  “You remember when I told you about my attack?” I nodded again. “Well, as you know, I killed the one who turned me. I tracked him down and did terrible things to him.”

  I wasn’t sure how to take this news. I had known he’d killed the werewolf who purposely turned him. What I didn’t know was what he did to him.

  “Nothing you can say will upset me, Eramus. Whatever you did, I’m sure you had your reasons.” When he remained silent I asked, “Did you torture him?”

  “Yes. My grandfather had a book that supposedly told how to break the curse of lycanthropy.”

  “And this involved torturing the one who attacked you?”

  “Yes. Supposedly if you could track down the one who bit or scratched you, before your first full moon…an
d kill him, then you would be free of the curse.”

  “Kill him how?” Something told me I didn’t want to know, but I couldn’t seem to stop myself from asking.

  “Rip out his heart and eat it.”

  “Holy shit. You did that?”

  I pulled back to see his reaction and Eramus made a face as if he was going to be sick. “Why do you think I have nightmares? Obviously, it didn’t work. What a load of bullshit. Lycanthropy isn’t a curse, it’s a disease. I knew this, but at the time I was desperate.”

  Once again I didn’t know how to react. So, I just sat there, staring at him.

  “I did upset you, didn’t I?”

  The deep rumble of his voice soothed me, despite what he’d just said. I thought it over for a minute before answering. “Surprisingly…no.”

  He laughed. “Are you serious? You’re okay with knowing I ate his heart?”

  “Considering everything else that’s happened lately?” I shrugged. “Yeah, I’m good with it.”

  *

  The next morning Eramus went into town alone and I stayed to cook breakfast. Cooking was something I enjoyed and it helped to take my mind off everything else. In fact, I was so busy trying to distract myself that at first I didn’t hear the doorbell.

  I looked through the peephole and saw Crazy Wolf.

  When I opened the door he just stood there, looking defeated.

  “What do you want?” My question was harsh, but my tone wasn’t.

  “I’ve come to tell you where to meet Maxwell tomorrow night.”

  He might as well have punched me for all the effect his words had. “So, you’re his messenger?”

  “He’s my alpha, I have no choice.” He handed me a piece of paper and I glanced to see some directions written across it. “It’s easier this way. If I had to tell you, I’d get you lost.”

  I looked at the paper again. “I might get lost anyway. This is in the middle of nowhere.”

  He laughed and I realized how long it had been since I’d heard that sound. Damn it, I missed my friend. Since Justina had moved here two years ago I hadn’t realized how much I didn’t see Wolf anymore. But now that he was back, no matter the circumstances, I kind of liked having him around.