What You Wish For

by Fern Michaels

  Helen was exhausted by the time Isabel led her to the comfortable kitchen chair. “Tea or coffee?”

  “Tea. Could you check on Lucie?”

  Isabel was back in a moment. “She’s sleeping. She’s comfortable. Gerry was singing to her. I’m sure his voice isn’t as soothing as yours, but his touch is gentle. Animals trust him. Lucie knows she’s in good hands. I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to go back into her kennel. I think we might be able to fashion a bed for her at the far end of the clinic. Lucie isn’t going to be doing much moving around, and you’ll be more comfortable. I’m going to stay here today. I’ll need some information from you before I can take you to the shelter. You will have to be honest with me.”

  “I’ll tell you anything you want to know as long as you promise me my husband can’t get to me and Lucie.”

  “I promise. For now, I want you to stop thinking of your husband as your husband. He is someone you used to know, someone who stole your life and then abused that life. He doesn’t deserve the title of husband. Now, what is his name and where does he work? Do you know his social security number? I need to document everything where that man is concerned. No matter how insignificant a detail might seem, I want you to talk about it. Are we clear on this?”

  “Yes, we’re clear on everything.”

  “Good. Now, how old are you? Do you have children? Where exactly do you live?”

  Helen blinked. She hated thinking about Daniel, and she detested talking about the man she’d married. “I’m 28. No, we don’t have children. I secretly took the pill. I didn’t want Daniel’s children because I didn’t know if he would abuse them or not. I kept the pills in my tampon box so Daniel wouldn’t know I was taking them. We live . . . lived in Whispering Willows. Daniel insisted we move there because he said it was the place to live. There are several mortgages on the house now. Everything is on time payments. I wanted to get a job, but he said no.”

  “So typical,” Isabel muttered.

  Halfway through Helen’s monologue, the phone rang. Isabel reached behind her to grab at the kitchen phone. “Davis Clinic.” She listened a moment before she said, “I just came in, let me put Dr. Davis on the phone.” The color drained from Helen’s face when she saw Isabel put her finger to her lips. Daniel.

  Isabel opened the kitchen door that led into the clinic. “Dr. Davis, there’s a gentleman on the phone who needs to speak to you.” She mouthed the words, Helen’s husband.

  Helen struggled up from the chair she’d been sitting on to join Isabel in the doorway, her eyes wide with fear.

  “Gerald Davis speaking. No, I haven’t had any emergencies in over a week, Mr. Ward. As a matter of fact, I haven’t taken on any new patients in over a year. You could try the Sanders Clinic. They’re open twenty-four hours a day. Good-bye.”

  “How . . . how did he ... sound?” Helen whispered.

  “Normal. Said he was walking his dog and she ran into the road, got grazed, and then ran off into the night. He said he’d been searching all night for her.”

  “He’ll come here. I know he will. I have to leave. You don’t know my . . . You don’t know this man.”

  “You can’t leave, Helen,” Isabel said. “Lucie can’t be moved yet. You’re safe. I’m going to sit at the desk all day. You are going to stay back here with Lucie. Gerald keeps the doors locked and the buzzer opens them. You have to trust us, Helen.”

  “I do trust you. It’s him I don’t trust. You don’t know him like I do. You don’t know what he’s capable of doing to get what he wants.”

  Isabel wrapped her arm around Helen’s shoulder. “It’s true, I don’t know the man, but I know thousands of men just like him. Those thousands of men have not gotten to one of the women in the shelter. In all the years we’ve been helping battered women, we only lost two. They elected to return to their husbands. One is now dead at her husband’s hand, and the other one is still with her husband. She is still being battered.”

  “I’m going to sit with Lucie,” Helen said. “If you need to know anything else, just ask me.”

  “I have enough for now. Take your tea with you. Gerry will help you make up a bed. It’s going to be all right, Helen. You need to believe that,” Isabel said gently.

  “I want to believe you. I need to believe you. Why am I still afraid?”

  “We’re strangers. This is new to you. Your mind isn’t ready to accept or believe there are people who truly care about you. It comes in time the way trust does. Go now, sing to Lucie.”

  When the door closed behind Helen, Gerry said, “Seems to me I remember you singing to that stray mutt you found when we were kids. You actually had him a whole year before your father found out.”

  “I couldn’t have done it without you and Artie. God, how I loved that dog. You’re right, I used to sing, ‘You are my sunshine, my only sunshine’ until my ears would ring with the words. He loved it. He’d bark and whine and howl.”

  Gerry laughed. “The best was when the three of us used to sing together. All off-key. As I recall, the dog loved it!”

  “It was all so long ago, Gerry. Sometimes I can’t believe I was ever young. My father . . .”

  “We aren’t going down that road today, Izzie. He’s dead, let him rest in peace.”

  “He doesn’t deserve peace. You’re right. That road has too many potholes. It’s almost ten o’clock. I’ll sit out at the desk. Let me know if there’s any change in Lucie. I’m going to get a head start on Helen’s new life. I want to thank you, Gerry, for everything, especially for being my friend. Getting to this place in time wouldn’t have been easy if it weren’t for you and Artie.”

  “I hate maudlin women,” Gerry said gruffly.

  “Not as much as I hate maudlin men,” Isabel said, tweaking his kneecap. “We’re just a couple of old softies.”

  “You’ll make it work for them, won’t you, Izzie?”

  “Of course, but she has to do her part. Talk to her today. She really needs to know someone cares. She trusts you, and that’s half the battle as you well know.”

  “Do you want me to tell her about the sanctuary or do you just want me to talk about nothing?”

  “Ordinary things at first, pave the way for the sanctuary. It will probably be your voice more than your words that will calm her down. She’s scared out of her wits, and she has every right to be scared. People like Daniel Ward are like those monsters we used to think hid in our closets at night when we were kids. I’m calling Artie as soon as I get things squared away. I want that man off my project. I want new passwords installed immediately. It will tip him off, but I can’t take the chance. I have to do it.”

  “Then do it. For whatever it’s worth, you have my blessing.”

  “Thanks, Gerry.”

  “No. Thank you, Izzie.”

  3

  Helen stared down at the green nylon bag that held her meager belongings. All compliments of a woman named Billie. In her life she’d never felt this alone, this vulnerable. Tears welled in her eyes. She did her best to blink them away.

  “Are you having second thoughts, Helen?” the veterinarian asked.

  “No, not really. I’ve always been afraid of the unknown. All I know is my past. My future is like a blank canvas. That frightens me. I’ve never been anywhere outside this state, outside this area really. I went straight from my mother’s house to a small efficiency apartment. I worked at a boutique and the pay wasn’t that great. I took night courses, graduated from college, and got a job with a graphics-design company. Daniel was the first man who showed any interest in me, and I fell for him. He was so unlike any of the men my mother brought home. He was all polished and handsome, and nine years older than I. The boys at school seemed immature and only wanted to score. My mother never cared about me, and her last man friend certainly didn’t care about me. I knew it was just a matter of time before he homed in on me. That’s why I moved out My mother had a fit because she wanted me to pay her rent. Daniel made so many prom
ises to me. He said he would take care of me for the rest of my life. For some reason hearing all those promises was important to me at that particular time. I tried to be a good wife, Dr. Davis. I know he’s going to find me. Somehow, some way, he will: That frightens me more than anything.”

  “No, he will not find you. I want you to trust Billie and all the people at the shelter. They won’t let it happen. I give you my word on that.”

  “How am I ever going to repay you, Dr. Davis?”

  “You aren’t. It’s that simple. Seeing Lucie walk across the clinic floor was all the thanks I needed. Sometimes, young lady, when God is good to you, you have to give back. He has been very good to me. Someday you will do the same thing for someone. Kind of a trade-off. I’m going to miss you and our nightly game of checkers,” the vet said gruffly. “Your spaghetti wasn’t bad either. You realize you can never call me, don’t you?”

  The tears she’d been unable to hold in check rolled down Helen’s cheeks. “I know.”

  “In many ways it’s going to be like being in the Witness Protection Program. You and Lucie are going to be well taken care of. You’ll rebuild your life, and someday you will meet someone worthy of your affection. Daniel Ward is never going to be able to hurt you again.”

  “Can I ask a question? I know you said questions are discouraged, but I want to know why, after that first day, Billie never came back. Is she your lady friend?”

  Gerald Davis threw back his head and laughed. “I wish. Billie works tirelessly for the shelter. It’s a job she takes very seriously. Names aren’t important. The less you know, the better off you are. We’re good friends. There were times when I thought . . . times when I would have liked to have it be more, but she discouraged it. Billie didn’t have too good a time of it growing up. She is independent and wants to stay that way. It works for us. She’s that rare person one calls friend. You know the kind you can call in the middle of the night the way I did when you arrived. She’s the kind of person you would trust your kids, your animals, and your money with.”

  Helen nodded. “I would give anything to have a friend like that. I never really had a friend. Perhaps one day I will.”

  “If you had such a friend, I wonder if you would have confided in her. I wonder if having such a friend would have kept you in that house even after this last incident. Friendships can be very powerful and an incentive to stay in a bad relationship.”

  “I don’t know, Dr. Davis. Lucie got me through it all. Sometimes I would talk to her for hours. I want to believe she understood. For a little dog, she is extremely protective and loving. I couldn’t have made it without her. You saved her life. I’ll never forget that.”

  The vet’s voice turned gruff again. “I really think she liked my singing. She didn’t howl after the first few days. I hear the shelter’s van. Are you sure you have everything?”

  “Everything except Lucie. Are you sure it’s okay for me to keep the carrier?”

  “Absolutely. Don’t let her get too active. She’s feeling better, but I don’t want her to overdo it. She needs another week at the most. Well, young lady, these past ten days are going into my memory book. Trust Billie and her friends, and you won’t go wrong.”

  Helen didn’t trust herself to speak. Instead she gave the vet a bone-crushing hug that he returned until Helen squealed. A second later she was out the door, the carrier in one hand and the nylon bag in the other. She didn’t look back.

  It was a long, comfortable ride with ordinary day-to-day conversation. The two women discussed the weather, Dr. Davis’s busy practice, and Lucie’s wonderful recovery. Knowing she was in capable hands, Helen relaxed.

  It was the first day of the rest of her life. She offered up a silent prayer of thanks.

  “One more block, and we’re there,” Izzie said an hour later.

  “Will you be staying, Billie? You never said; do you work here?”

  “No, I won’t be staying. I suppose you could say I work here in a manner of speaking. That was a question, and you aren’t supposed to ask questions. Until we get your papers finalized, you are guest Number Nine. Lucie is guest Number Nine-A. Our records will indicate that you arrived with someone. Once you are inside, everything will be explained to you. Lucie will love the walled-in garden. I wish we could have met under other circumstances. We will do our very best for you. We will expect nothing less from you. Good-bye and good luck. I’ll wait here in the van until you get inside. Oh, one last thing. I thought this might be of interest to you. Read it at your leisure. It’s the latest copy of Silicon Alley. Good-bye, Lucie.” Lucie yipped and whimpered as Helen lifted the carrier from the van.

  It was a beautiful, sprawling, mission-style house in a quiet, private neighborhood. The scent of newly mown grass tantalized Helen’s nostrils as she made her way up the colorful brick path leading to the front door. Before she had a chance to ring the bell, the door was opened by a tiny, smiling woman wearing a coronet of gray braids. “Welcome. Come, come. It’s cool inside.”

  Helen turned to wave, but the dark blue van with the tinted windows was already headed back the way it came. “I’m Number Nine and ... this is Number Nine-A.”

  “I know. We’ve been expecting you both. I’m Mona. Follow me, and I’ll show you to your room. While you’re here, you will be responsible for your room, and we take turns with the bathrooms. We also take turns cooking and cleaning up. When you’re ready to join us, ring the bell at the top of the steps. Someone will fetch you to the garden. It’s everyone’s favorite spot. We’re about to begin one of our group-therapy sessions. You can observe, or you can join in. Tomorrow you will be required to join the discussion. This is your room.”

  Helen stepped across the threshold. She had no idea what she was expecting, but this pretty room with its crisscross sheer curtains billowing in the late-afternoon breeze wasn’t it. It was a feminine room right down to the ruffled organdy skirt on the small dressing table. She sighed with relief as she bent over to open the kennel door for Lucie. “She’s trained. She won’t pee on the carpet.”

  “I’m glad to hear that.” Mona smiled. “There are four wings to the house, all extending around the back. The only way into the garden is from the house. It was a safety measure. Just ring the bell when you’re ready.”

  The moment the door closed, Helen scooped up Lucie and then sat down on the bed. “This is our new home, at least for now. We don’t have any choices, Lucie. I think it’s going to work for us. You can sleep with me, but you can’t jump up and down. I’ll lift you. Mind me now. I always wanted a room like this with a frilly, flowered spread that matched a comfortable chair. Maybe I can read some books while I’m here. Ohhh, this carpet is so soft. We could even sleep on the floor if we wanted. And, look at this, we have our own personal fireplace nestled there in the corner. In case we get cold at night.” She cupped the Yorkie’s face in her hands. “I think we’re going to be just fine.”

  Lucie nuzzled Helen’s hand and then yipped softly.

  As Helen rang the bell at the top of the stairs, thirty miles away in Santa Clara, thirty-seven-year-old Daniel Ward was painfully struggling with his cane on the long walk down the hall to Arthur King’s offices. Each step was pure torture. His eyes murderous, he gritted his teeth. What the hell did the old goat want with him now? So what if he took ten days off. He never missed a day, never called in sick. Maybe he should quit this job and open up his own business. He could, if he wanted to, give Arthur King a run for his money with his hands tied behind his back.

  He’d taken great pains with his dress that day, knowing a meeting was imminent. The charcoal gray suit that was Silicon Valley’s mode of dress was cashmere. His shoes were Brooks Brothers, his pristine white shirt was monogrammed and his two-hundred-dollar tie was classic. He knew he would meet with Arthur King’s approval. One of Arthur’s personal one-on-one meetings that either boded excitement or disaster. Daniel wasn’t sure what to expect. He hadn’t been made COO, that much he knew. Maybe King wa
s going to bump him up to another prestigious position. King was great at creating unique titles and job demands. They were already draining his blood. What the hell more could he give them? First off, he would be chastised for missing the Christmas party. He’d rehearsed his prepared lies so many times he was starting to believe them himself. He was confident he could skate by on the lies and use his boyish charm.

  Daniel stopped at the solid mahogany door leading to Arthur King’s private offices. He sucked in his breath, then let it out in a soft swoosh before he opened the door. His knuckles turned white at the solid grip on the leather-topped cane.

  “You wanted to see me, Arthur?” he asked pleasantly.

  “Yes, Daniel. We missed you and Helen at the Christmas party. Come to think of it, we missed Helen at Thanksgiving, the Labor Day picnic, and the Fourth of July party. Did you know the field office had a pool going on whether you or Helen would show at the Christmas party?” King asked lazily as he leaned back in his swivel chair.

  “No, I didn’t know that, Arthur. I didn’t realize people paid so much attention to my personal life.” The guy was looking older and older each time he saw him. Maybe he was finally going to announce his retirement.

  “We’re a family here at ComStar, Daniel. You know that. I can understand you not attending with your injury and all, but I rather thought Helen would come.”

  “She said she would feel out of place without me. Most people don’t know this, but Helen is painfully shy. I didn’t realize it was so important, Arthur. Since you elected not to make me COO, I can’t see that it matters.”

  “I don’t like sour grapes, Daniel. Wexler was the best man for the job. He has five years of seniority over you. Therefore, he was the logical choice. To show there are no hard feelings, I would like it if you and Helen would come to dinner this evening. I have some ideas I’d like to run by you and Helen.”

  Daniel felt his stomach muscles tighten into a knot. “I can make it, but Helen went to Los Angeles with a friend.”