Saying Yes: Stormy Love: Book 1

by Ella Sparkle

  Mike stepped forward, “How about just be careful and if he acts like an ass again, call us and we will come get you.”

  Cassie laughed, “That works too.”

  “Alright, thank you,” I quickly told them both as I turned and ran back across the street to Nick. He handed me a helmet and I hopped on the back of his bike.

  Somehow it all felt so familiar but so different at the same time. I knew we were at a turning point. I just hoped it wasn't going to be a turn in the wrong direction.

  Chapter 46

  Jenna

  “What the hell do you mean you woke up the next morning alone?” Cassie was in the kitchen waving a wooden spoon around as she was talking. We were at my apartment packing up the last things as I prepared to leave the next day. My law school classes started on Monday.

  I sighed. “Exactly that. I woke up in his bed, but he was already gone. He left a note.”

  “Oh. A note. That totally makes everything all better.” Cassie said sarcastically as she started waving the spoon around again and using it like a pointer for added emphasis. “Who the hell does that? No one sneaks out of their own fucking house and leaves a note. Please tell me you burned his place down on your way out.”

  “No, I didn’t burn the place down.” I couldn’t help but smile a little. I appreciated that Cassie totally had my back.

  “Well, what did this amazing piece of great literary work say? Do you need me to go burn his fucking condo down?”

  “It basically said ‘thank you for a memorable night’ and that ‘he got a call there was a problem at one of the job sites so he had to go, but didn’t want to wake me.’ No need to commit arson.”

  “That's it?” It was obvious from the tone of Cassie’s voice she was not impressed.

  “It also said to ‘go ahead and help myself to anything in the fridge’ and ‘he would call me.’”

  “Did he?” Cassie threw the wooden spoon in a box and started wrapping my dishes in bubble wrap.

  “Yes,” I said, wrapping up a drinking glass and gently placing it in the moving box.

  “How was that?”

  I paused and reached up to grab another drinking glass. “Strained,” I replied as I started wrapping the second glass. “It's like when we are together, it's all fireworks and amazing. When we're apart, we both seem to shut down and retreat back into our shells and start putting up walls again.”

  “Have you guys talked any more about where things stand between you?”

  I looked down at the glass in my hand. “No. Any time it comes up we both shut down and it feels like neither of us really says everything we want to.”

  Cassie stopped what she was doing and focused her full attention on me. “Okay, you have identified the issue so, how do you fix it?”

  “Good question.”

  “So, you woke up to a stupid-ass note and no Nick. How was everything before that?” Cassie resumed wrapping dishes and packing them in one of the many boxes.

  I grabbed a coffee mug and tried to focus. It was hard to pack when my mind and heart were all jumbled up with thoughts of Nick. “It was amazing. We got back to his place and he actually lifted me off his bike and carried me to his bedroom, bridal style.”

  “That is like something straight out of a movie... or a really hot romance novel!” Cassie said with a wide-eyed dreamy expression.

  “I know! He was so sweet and tender all night... I thought he was trying to apologize and make up for what happened that night, but now part of me wonders if it was him trying to say goodbye.” I could feel my heart sink at the thought of that being our last night together. It had been a beautiful night, but I wasn’t ready for Nick and I to be over.

  “Well, now you've had a few days to obsessively worry and over-analyze everything which I am sure has helped tremendously.” Cassie’s voice was, again, laced with sarcasm.

  I chuckled. “You know me so well.”

  Cassie started to tape up the box of dishes and wrote ‘Food Room’ on it in marker. She had labeled all of my boxes with silly phrases. “I take it there was very little talking going on during your night with Nick.”

  I smirked. “Not unless you count moaning, grunting, or yelling out each other’s names.”

  “Now that’s my girl!” Cassie held her hand up for a high five, and I smacked it with my palm. “Are you going to see him tomorrow before you leave?”

  I had completely stopped packing and was leaning against the counter talking to Cassie. “I don’t know. I hope so. When we talked on the phone, he asked what my plans were for the next few days, so I let him know. We've exchanged a few texts since then but nothing more.”

  “So, what are you going to do?” Cassie asked as she started taping together another box.

  “I don’t know. It feels like he's pushing me away and I just keep bobbing along. I miss what we had before all of this stuff about me leaving became an issue. I don’t know if we ignored that fact for too long or if it was always there. Cass... I just miss him.” I started to tear up.

  Cassie stopped what she was doing and turned to me. “Oh, girl. You are in so damn deep with him,” she said, shaking her head slowly.

  The tears started to slide down my cheeks. “Cassie, I think I'm in love with him, but I am afraid he doesn’t feel the same way, and if I tell him it will drive him away for good. The idea of him being gone for good hurts worse than this stupid ‘friend plan’ or whatever it is we're going to try.”

  I started sobbing. Cassie came over and wrapped me in a big hug. “I think that is the most honest thing you have said about your feelings for Nick. But Jen, I am the wrong person to be telling. You need to tell him, not me.”

  “What if this is the end, Cassie? I don’t think I can handle that.”

  Cassie pulled back and held me at arm’s length. “You know I am never leaving you, right? You never gave up on me when, in all reality, you probably should have. That means you're stuck with my hot ass forever.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh through my tears. Cassie and I had a whole lot of history together and after the past year, she was the only person left in my life I could count on. “While we're on the subject of things that you should tell Nick, have you told him about some of the stuff you went through in the past year?”

  I sniffed and wiped some tears away with the sleeve of my sweatshirt. “Not in a lot of detail, no. Just little bits here and there.”

  “You should tell him. It might give him a better idea of where you are coming from.”

  I paused for a moment to consider what Cassie said. “I don’t want him to think I'm crazy…"

  Cassie held her palm up, signaling me to stop, as she interrupted. “If he hears any of your past and thinks you are crazy, then he was not even good enough to be with you in the first place. Again, you have got to talk to him. You can’t just keep trying to portray this half picture as the full meal deal.”

  I buried my face in my hands. “Why are relationships so complicated?”

  “Because it involves two people stripping everything back until there is nothing hidden and then accepting the other person for all they are. The good and the bad.”

  “Is that how things are between you and Mike?”

  Cassie shifted around and looked uncomfortable for a moment, which made me raise an eyebrow at her. “We're working on it,” she finally said.

  “Does he know what happened with you in college?” I asked.

  “Some of it. It was not an easy conversation to have, but it is a part of me and my past and has made me who I am today. I'm still working on myself and Mike knows that.” Cassie picked up a roll of bubble wrap and started packing again. She looked at me with a soft smile. “Sometimes it's a lot easier to give someone advice about what they should do with their problems than it is to follow that advice in your own life.” I wasn’t quite sure what she meant by that and Cassie didn't elaborate any further so I let the subject drop.

  Cassie and I fell into a comfortable rhyth
m as we continued packing. A few hours later, we were taping up the last box when I heard the familiar rumble of a Harley turn into the parking lot of my apartment. I felt a smile break out on my face and I could not contain my excitement. “He's here!”

  Cassie stood up and dusted herself off. “Well, that's my cue to leave. Think about what we talked about earlier, okay?”

  “I will. Are you and Mike still coming by in the morning?”

  “Yes. I'll text you first. I don’t think I could recover from the trauma of accidentally walking in on you and Nick going at it in the middle of the living room that early in the morning.”

  I blushed. “Cassie! Too much!”

  Cassie laughed. “My point exactly. Seeing that would be way too much!” I started laughing and smacked her on the arm. Cassie stopped laughing and paused. “Hey, not to change the subject, but shouldn’t he be up here knocking on your door by now?”

  I tipped my head to the side to see if I could hear him walking up the stairs but heard nothing. “He should. That is weird. I'll walk down to the parking lot with you. Maybe he's making a call or something before coming up.

  Cassie and I walked down to the parking lot. Nick was sitting on his motorcycle at the edge of the lot. Cassie gave me a little shove forward. “Go talk to him. Tell him how you feel. You’ve got this.”

  I turned and gave Cassie a hug. “I'll see you tomorrow,” I told her before I turned and started walking across the parking lot towards Nick.

  I was going to tell him how I felt and go from there. I could do it, right?

  The closer I got to him the more nervous I felt. I took a deep breath. I could do it... right?

  Chapter 47

  Nick

  What the fuck was I doing? I came to see Jenna. She was leaving the next morning, and, yet, I found myself completely unable to get off my bike and walk up the stairs. I had done it dozens of times before, but suddenly it was like my feet were stuck in concrete. I just needed to see her one last time before she left... but I didn’t want that day to be the last time I saw her.

  The past few days had been a bit of a shit show. After the night of the broken phone incident, Blaine Construction did get the contract to build Rickson Estates. It was a huge project, and already a giant pain in my ass. The investors were a very needy group of people. The last night Jenna had been at my place, one of the investors called early in the morning with an ‘emergency’ at the site that needed to be taken care of ‘right away.’ I left Jenna a note, but when I got to the site, the ‘emergency’ turned out to be something that could have easily waited until Monday. I had been really irritated having to leave Jenna for that, and she was gone by the time I got back home.

  It also looked like Blaine Construction was going to be awarded the contract for the other big project I'd bid on, a multi-year, multi-million dollar subdivision. I should have been thrilled to have landed both contracts; it solidified Blaine Construction as the top construction company in the area. Instead, I was frantic, making sure to hire enough people for the projects to run smoothly and had been working non-stop. It completely took away from any time I could have spent with Jenna before she left. The nagging voice in my head that kept telling me: ‘this is why you don’t get involved in relationships’ grew louder and louder every day.

  Jenna walked out of her apartment with Cassie and my heart skipped a beat seeing how beautiful she was. She was wearing cut-off jean shorts and an oversize sweatshirt, with her hair in a messy bun on her head. She looked so fucking perfect. I assumed, based on how she was dressed, she had been packing all day. She really was leaving. I physically felt a sharp pain in my chest at the thought.

  Jenna walked across the parking lot towards me. “Hey! I'm glad to see you. Do you want to come up? We could order some take-out for dinner?”

  I couldn’t even look at her, because if I did I was going to want to kiss her. If I kissed her, I wasn’t going to be able to let her go. I looked at the ground and tried to keep my expression as neutral as possible. “I don’t think I can do that tonight. I'm sorry. I... I just needed to see you before you leave.”

  “Oh. Okay.” Her voice was barely above a whisper. I glanced up at her and saw the flicker of disappointment cross her face before she quickly erased it. Fuck, I hated disappointing her... it felt like I was constantly screwing everything up when it came to her. The voice in my head chimed in; ‘this is why you don’t get involved in relationships.’ Jenna just looked at me for a moment. “We don’t have to get food.” She paused for a few beats. “Do you want to just come up and talk?”

  I ran my hand through my hair. With the way the past few weeks had gone, it was a wonder I hadn’t rubbed a fucking bald spot on my head. This was not going how I had hoped. Jenna stood close to me and I reached out to tuck a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “Not tonight. I just wanted to come by and make sure you were all packed and ready for tomorrow. I also just wanted to see you one last time before you go.” I could barely choke the words out. I felt like, if I just kept repeating over and over that she was leaving, it would somehow make things easier.

  My hand lingered by the side of her face. I just wanted to touch her. She leaned into my palm and at that moment I almost told her not to go. I wanted so badly to tell her to stay so we could give this thing between us a chance and maybe, in time, she could fall in love with me the same way I had fallen in love with her. I pulled my hand away and reminded myself I was not going to be the asshole who swooped in and stood in the way of her achieving her goals. I loved her too much for that and I wanted her to be happy.

  Jenna looked startled when I pulled my hand away from her. “Nick, why are you talking like this? This is a ‘see you later’ situation, not a goodbye. We agreed to keep in touch and see each other when we can. Remember?”

  I gave her as much of a smile as I could... it was a completely half-assed effort. “You're going to be busy with your first few weeks of school and getting settled into your new place. This is an exciting new chapter for you and one you've been planning for a long time. I'm really proud of you following your dream. Don’t let anything hold you back from achieving it,” I told her.

  “Why don’t you plan on coming to see me in two weeks?” Jenna’s voice was shaky. “You can see my new apartment, I can show you around the school... let me share this with you, Nick. It's a long drive, but we can spend the weekend together. After that weekend we can pick another one and I'll come back here. We can make this work.”

  I couldn’t stand it any longer. I climbed off my bike and pulled her into a big hug. I wrapped my arms all the way around her and rested my chin on the top of her head. It was amazing how perfectly we fit together... like I was made to hold her in my arms. Jenna turned her head and rested her cheek on my chest. I was sure she could hear the frenzied beating of my heart since it felt like it was about to explode out of my chest.

  I kissed the top of her head again. “I never planned on meeting anyone like you, Jenna. You came whirling into my life during a time I thought I had everything figured out about what I was doing and where I was going. I am so happy I got to share this time with you.”

  Jenna pulled her head back away from me. “Nick, I need to tell you something. I...”

  It was then that I noticed her tears. “Hey, are you crying?” I blurted out. I tipped her head up so she was looking at me. My heart shattered a little at the look on her face and the tears in her eyes. I had done that to her. Again. I didn’t fucking deserve her. “Dammit! All I seem to do and say lately is stupid shit that makes you cry. I am so sorry, Jenna. Please don’t cry. It breaks my heart to see you this way and it breaks it even more knowing I'm the one who did it to you.”

  Jenna seemed to be searching my face for something. I leaned down and kissed her gently on the lips before burying my face in her neck. I could smell her strawberry shampoo and it reminded me of the night we ran into each other at the club. My resolve almost cracked again, and once again I almost told her to just
stay. But I wasn’t going to take law school away from her. Instead, I whispered, “I should go.”

  Jenna grabbed the front of my shirt. “Please don’t leave,” she whispered back.

  “Jenna...”

  “Yes?” She said quickly.

  “I am so sorry. It was never supposed to be like this.” I was never supposed to fall in love with her. I was not going to get in her way.

  “Tell me what you are talking about, Nick.” Jenna reached up and took her face in my hands. I closed my eyes and leaned my forehead against hers. I couldn't tell her. I wanted to, but the words just wouldn't come.

  I kept my forehead pressed against hers. “Will you call me and let me know you made it there safely tomorrow?” I asked with my eyes still closed as I tried to soak in the feeling of just being with her.

  “Yes. Will I see you again before I leave?”

  “I don’t know if I can do that, Jenna.” I had already almost fucked everything up by asking her to stay. I didn’t think I could keep myself in check around her much longer.

  “Will I see you in two weeks? Please, Nick. Please come and see me.”

  “Okay,” I told her. Two weeks would be enough time to get my shit together and figure out what I was going to do.

  “Promise?” Jenna whispered.

  “Yes,” I whispered back.

  We stood there in the parking lot with our foreheads pressed together, tears running down both our faces. “I have to go,” I told Jenna as I pulled away and got back on my bike. If I didn’t leave, I knew I would not be able to let her go. I turned the Harley on and started to pull forward. I stopped before pulling out into the street and looked back at her again. I gave her a little half-smile and a wave and she waved back.

  Two weeks. Two weeks until I would see her again. Two weeks to figure out how I was going to put my life back in order without her. Two weeks to fucking figure it all out. Two weeks to get my shit together.