The Darkhorse_A Powerplay Novella

by Selena Laurence

  "Is everything okay?" Lisa asked, concern etching lines between her brows.

  "Better than okay," Jeff answered. "I just wanted to give you the heads up that Armstrong is going to announce my promotion in a few minutes."

  Lisa's eyes grew wide as she watched a grin of triumph slide across his sexy face. "No!"

  "Yes," he said, looking almost boyish in his excitement.

  She bounced on her toes a couple of times before throwing her arms around his neck. "I'm so proud of you," she whispered in his ear.

  "Thank you. I couldn't have done it without you," he said.

  Her joy faded a few shades. How she wished he meant that in the traditional sense—that he couldn't have done it because she'd supported him, advised him, been there for him. But of course he only meant it because she'd provided him with a cardboard cutout labeled "wife”.

  "Of course," she said, her mood declining by the second.

  He gave her a soft kiss on the forehead. "I need to go stand with Armstrong for the announcement, but I'll find you in a bit?"

  "Sure." She watched him walk to the front of the room where General Armstrong waited.

  "Mission accomplished," Nell murmured, as she slid into place by Lisa's side again.

  "Yes," Lisa answered, her heart aching. Mission accomplished. One wife out of a job.

  Jeff closed the door behind the last of the catering workers. He sighed, exhausted but happy. The party had been a substantial success. Lisa had pulled off the perfect classy holiday gathering. The guests had been glowing and exuberant as they left, everyone saying it was the best holiday fete they'd been to in years. Every last detail, from the decorations on the tree to the music playing in the background had been pitch perfect. Jeff was amazed at her skill.

  Her looks and charm hadn't hurt either. Everyone from cranky old General Martin down to his own secretary raved about how talented and lovely his new wife was. And he had to agree. She was the perfect package. Smart, confident, beautiful. How he'd ever gotten so lucky he'd never understand, but he wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. He knew he had to make this marriage real as soon as possible.

  Yes, Jeff didn't want to lose this woman, and if he needed to put another ring on her finger to prove it, that's what he'd do.

  "Oh!" Lisa cried in surprise as he came up behind her at the kitchen sink and wrapped his arms around her waist.

  He buried his nose in her neck, breathing deeply of her familiar scent. His cock swelled, trained already to respond uniquely to this woman.

  "Leave that, and I'll do it in the morning," he murmured into her skin. "Let's go have a private celebration now."

  She stiffened in his arms, and a warning flickered to life in his chest.

  "Lisa?"

  She turned slowly, as he stepped away, his hands still on her hips. Her gaze wouldn't meet his as she began to speak.

  "I've been doing some thinking..."

  That warning inside flared.

  "I don't think we should do the friends with benefits thing anymore." She stepped out and around him, busying herself with something on a countertop across the room. "I mean, now you have your promotion, we don't really need to keep doing this for a whole year, do we?"

  A wave of nausea passed through him. "Well, that's what we agreed to..."

  "Right. But I don't think it's necessary. I mean, I can work with the latest round of new families to get them settled, then throw another party, maybe two. My guess is I can have all of it done by March, and then we can get back to our regular lives."

  His head squeezed with pain. How was this happening? Yeah, she'd been a little distant the day they'd gotten the Christmas tree, but since then they'd continued to have sex, and she'd been so committed to making the party a success. Had she only done all that because she wanted him to get promoted so she could get out of the agreement?

  "Um, ok, I guess if that's what you want. I mean, do you want to renegotiate? I'm happy to look at it all again. We could add a car to the house purchase, or maybe an IRA, that would be a great safety net for you when you get older..."

  She turned to him with a sad smile. "No, we don't need to renegotiate." She shook her head. "In fact, I don't really want the money at all. What with the sex and everything, it doesn't feel right."

  He stared at her. Fuck that. There was no way he was going to let her go back to her life with all the debt her asshole ex had left her hanging over her head.

  "Well, you need to figure out how to make it feel right then," he snapped, a pain sawing through his chest. "We had an agreement, and you've more than fulfilled your part. The sex didn't have anything to do with it. I got my promotion, you'll get out of debt. I won't accept anything less."

  Her eyes flared with anger. "It's not up to you to accept it or not. I'm not a prostitute. I won't take money from a man I've been having sex with."

  "Lisa, I didn't mean—"

  "I have papers to grade." She turned on her heel.

  "Lisa—"

  "Goodnight."

  And just like that, Jeff went from being a new Brigadier General with the perfect wife by his side, to a simple soldier in love with a woman who didn't want him back.

  Chapter 14

  The next days were an exercise in avoiding her roommate. Lisa waited until she heard his car leave the garage in the mornings before she came out of her room. She stayed away from the house as much as possible, staying at coffee shops until late in the evening grading papers, then sneaking in before bed, often seeing the light from under Jeff's office door, but not saying a word as she went up to her bedroom.

  She could have gone to her own house that still sat half empty, half unpacked, none of her personal belongings there. Somehow though, in spite of her newfound determination to end the marriage and the arrangement before the year was up, she couldn't bear the idea of going back there yet. She knew it was foolish—self-destructive and weak—but she couldn't quite yet make herself leave his home where his presence was everywhere.

  "What's eating you?" Nell asked as Lisa sat down next to her on the sofa in Lisa's mother's living room on Saturday afternoon. She'd made sure to sleep in until after Jeff had gone for his regular Saturday morning workout, then snuck out to breakfast with Nell before they went to her mom's house to help wrap gifts for the local homeless shelter, something the three of them did each year.

  "What do you mean?" Lisa asked as her mother walked into the room and set down three cups of hot cider.

  "She means why do you look like you just lost your puppy?" her mom asked.

  Lisa shrugged. "Nothing, maybe the seasonal blues."

  Her mother and Nell shot looks at one another. "You?" Her mom raised an eyebrow. "You love the season. It's been your favorite since you were a tiny child. You've never once been depressed at Christmas."

  "My guess is the real problem is about six feet tall, strong, and silent," Nell added cheerfully.

  "Sell out," Lisa muttered under her breath.

  "What's this?" her mother asked, worry settling across her face. "Has Jeff done something?"

  "No, of course not. I haven't even seen him since the night of the party."

  "Oh, and why is that?" Nell asked.

  Lisa shrugged again, the recalcitrant teenager in her coming out.

  Her mother set her cup down on the coffee table before she picked up a pair of scissors and a square of wrapping paper.

  "Lisa Janine, out with it. Nell, start wrapping."

  As both her mother and Nell started cutting paper to fit the various toys and necessities they had stacked on the floor, Lisa sighed. "I might have made a little error in judgement."

  Her mother hummed in acknowledgment but waited her out.

  "Fine, I definitely made an error in judgement. I sort of—" She turned to Nell. "Do I have to say this in front of my mother?"

  "Oh for heaven's sake, Lisa, you slept with the man," her mother said, rolling her eyes.

  "Just shoot me now," Lisa replied, burying
her head in her hands for a moment as Nell laughed.

  Her mom picked up a toy dump truck, turning it in her hands, trying to gauge how best to wrap the awkward item. "Sweetheart, you're thirty and you've been married twice, I hardly think you don't have sex."

  "But I'm being paid by this man. It's like I'm a...a..."

  "Wife?" her mother asked, her eyes wide in false surprise. "Marriage is a combination of sex, money, and companionship, how is this any different?"

  "People who are really married don't have a contract stipulating what one person will do before the other person pays them."

  "Does your contract stipulate sex as one of those things you'll be paid for?"

  "No!" Lisa's cheeks heated in shame. "In fact, it says we won't have sex. With each other or anyone else."

  "Then I don't see the problem," her mother answered.

  Lisa sighed.

  "I think the real problem has more to do with how you feel about the sex than the money he's paying you," Nell added softly.

  "Is that true?" her mother asked.

  Lisa's eyes burned. "I'm so stupid."

  "Oh, sweetie. Have you told him how you feel?"

  Lisa shook her head and her mother patted her on the knee. "How do you know he doesn't feel the same way then?"

  Nell coughed dramatically and Lisa glared at her, which only made Nell cough harder as she tried to stifle laughter.

  "Mom, I know you don't get this, but he only wanted to marry me to get his promotion. He didn't even know me. He wasn't looking for a real wife, just a job."

  "Mmhm. And were you looking for a real husband?"

  "Well, no, of course not, the ink on my divorce was hardly dry—"

  "And did you know him?"

  "You know I'd only met him twice—"

  "And you only married him to get your debts paid. But you're telling me you ended up having sex with him and now you've developed feelings for the man as well?"

  Lisa nodded.

  "Huh. So things changed for you at some point in the last few weeks. Why do you think they might not have changed for him?"

  Lisa stared at her mother.

  Nell cleared her throat. "I've seen the way he looks at you. That's not a man who's using you for a promotion."

  Naked fear swirled through Lisa's gut as she sat and processed what they were telling her. Was it possible? That his feelings had changed too? That he might want something more than only a contract and sex? If he did, then what? What happened when he got another deployment? What happened when he wanted to go somewhere else and she didn't? When he wanted that inevitable change and she wasn't new and fresh?

  "Lisa," her mother warned, "I can hear the gears in your head from here. As much as I love you, dear, as much as I love your brilliant mind, your tendency to overthink things isn't working for you now. You married him on a whim, you went with your gut. You need to keep doing that. I can't say what will happen if you tell him how you really feel, but I can tell you what will happen if you don't. Nothing. And given the way you've been looking at each other, that would be tragic."

  Nell nodded. "So sad," she said, looking unusually serious.

  Lisa agreed. It would be sad. Maybe sadder than her divorce and her debt combined. Maybe the saddest thing she'd ever experienced. She wasn't sure she wanted to live with sadness like that forever.

  "I need your advice," Jeff said to Derek as they sat in a Georgetown bar after a morning at Spar gym, where they boxed each Saturday.

  "I'll do what I can," Derek answered, tipping his beer at Jeff in salute.

  "It's about Lisa..."

  "Ah." Derek smirked. "Can't say I haven't been waiting for this."

  "What's that mean?"

  "It means both London and I noticed how you were looking at her at your Christmas party last weekend."

  "How was I looking at her, exactly?"

  "Like you were having a lot more than sex with her."

  Jeff sighed. Damn. Guess he wasn't as circumspect as he thought. "I may have developed..."

  "Feelings?" Derek smirked.

  Jeff chose not to engage, sticking to the topic at hand. "When did you know things with London had moved from an act to the real thing?"

  Derek's gaze softened as he twisted his beer bottle on the bar top. "If I'm going to be honest, things were never an act with her. I didn't want to admit it to myself, I used every excuse in the book—needing to protect my client's reputation, needing to save the campaign—but the fact is, I wanted her from the first moment I laid eyes on her and the second I had the chance to tie her to me I did it."

  Jeff sighed. It sounded all too familiar. He'd picked Lisa out of thin air after seeing her one time. He'd used her debt as a justification, but the fact was, he'd have never discovered the debt if he hadn't been hell-bent on having her in the first place. Yes, it was true, Jeff had used whatever he could to justify getting Lisa into his life, even when he hadn't thought he could have her in his bed.

  And now he wanted all of it. He wanted all of her. And he was afraid she might not want him at all.

  "How did you know it was real for her?" he asked his friend.

  Derek shrugged. "I didn't. It wasn't easy getting us to the point where she could believe it was real and we were right for each other." He paused, chuckling softly. "She had a lot of baggage, you know. There are never guarantees in this stuff, my man. You have to take a chance, but I'm telling you, it's worth it in the end."

  "Says you," Jeff muttered. "It worked out for you."

  "I have a feeling it will for you too, but my best advice is don't waste any time. Make the grand gesture and do it fast. It's a pit of vipers out there. DC is a hotbed of trolling men, and one of them will snatch a woman like her up quick if you're not careful."

  A grand gesture. Jeff looked down at his cell phone. December 23rd flashed on the screen as he touched it.

  "I need to go," he said, standing and tossing a handful of bills on the bar top.

  Derek stared at him in surprise.

  "Grand gesture. No time to explain." Jeff shoved his phone in the pocket of his sweats and turned to rush out of the bar. He could hear Derek's laughter clear to the door.

  Chapter 15

  Lisa woke on Christmas Eve with a heavy weight in her heart. It was her absolute favorite day of the year, and yet she'd come to accept that with things between her and Jeff left undone, it would be meaningless.

  She knew she had to talk to him, and while she didn't want to find out he didn't feel the same way she did the night before Christmas, she also couldn't bear to go through the holiday without knowing.

  She put on a sweater and leggings then made her way downstairs, simultaneously disappointed and relieved to find the house empty. But when she went into the kitchen, she found both breakfast and a note waiting for her. The pancakes and bacon were on a tray wrapped carefully in plastic so they'd stay fresh. A single rose was in a vase on the tray and a note that read:

  I had to go run a few errands. I'm hoping you can have dinner with me tonight. I have a Christmas gift I'd like to give you.

  Yours,

  Jeff.

  p.s. Eat the bacon. You need the protein.

  She smiled to herself as she leaned over to smell the rose. It was a deep blood red, and she wondered if he knew the symbolism of different colors of roses. Red was for love. But it would be silly to think Jeff was aware of that. He was a lifelong bachelor and a real man's man. He probably got a red rose because it was the most common color.

  She slid the plate into the microwave to warm it up, then re-read the note. Pressing it to her chest, she took a deep cleansing breath, her eyes shutting for a moment. One way or another she'd settle this tonight. And until then, she only had a few hours to prepare her own Christmas gift. She'd be risking her heart, but she needed Jeff to know just how real this had become for her. She needed to give him a Christmas he'd never forget.

  Jeff walked into the house carrying his overcoat, shaking snow off his hair an
d stomping his feet. The snow had started up thirty minutes ago and it was coming down in thick fluffy flakes, starting to collect on lawns and tree branches.

  "Lisa?" he called, wondering if she'd read his note and whether he'd find her here waiting, or long gone, along with all his hopes for the future.

  He walked through the foyer and into the living room, then stopped for a moment, staring at the sight that greeted him. The Christmas tree was lit up like a beacon of hope, the tiny white lights Lisa had so painstakingly hung illuminating the big room as well as the hundred-plus sparkling ornaments that decorated the full branches.

  There was a fire crackling in the fireplace, and two wine glasses with a bottle of red sat on the coffee table. Relief washed through him as he walked toward the dining room and kitchen.

  "Lisa?" he called again. And then there she was, walking into the dining room with a big fluffy poinsettia she placed in the middle of the dining table.

  "Hi," he said, looking at the table set for two with candles, Christmas china and crystal. "This looks amazing. I didn't mean you needed to make dinner. I was going to take you out."

  "I know," she said, her cheeks pinking up. "I wanted to. It's Christmas Eve, we have to have a traditional holiday dinner."

  "Ok." He stood there like a dumbass, so overwhelmed with his feelings he was speechless for a moment. That she'd go to the trouble to cook for him, much less do all this—the table, the candles, the decorations—it was more than anyone had ever done for him in his whole life, and he didn't think there were words to express how much it meant to him.

  "It'll be another forty-five minutes until it's all ready though. I thought maybe we could have some wine? You said you wanted to talk...I have something I'd like to say, too." She gestured toward the living room and he nodded, following.

  Once they were settled on the sofa and he'd uncorked the wine and served them each a glass, he held his up. "So should we toast to a Merry Christmas?"