Brace for Impact

by Becky Harmon

  “You look tired,” Sheila said, giving her a wink.

  Was Sheila seeing something she thought was hidden? Lucy turned her face away to look at the football game. She managed to mask all emotion when she turned back to her.

  “Yeah, I got up early. I wanted to have some time at the house before coming over.”

  “And then we harassed you all morning.”

  Lucy laughed. “It wasn’t harassment.”

  Sheila leaned forward. “I’ll be honest. I don’t really care for football, so Karen has been looking forward to watching the games with someone who does.”

  “I’m happy to oblige.”

  Sheila disappeared shortly after their conversation ended and Lucy tried to concentrate on the game. The Seahawks were up by three touchdowns and it looked like they would take the win. Karen didn’t talk much other than to yell at the referees occasionally. So Lucy had a hard time keeping her attention on the game. Even though she didn’t want it to, her mind replayed the details of her night with Dex. With everything so fresh, she wasn’t surprised that she could remember every touch and every sound. She had been pleasantly surprised to learn Dex wasn’t a silent lover. She smiled as she remembered one particular moment.

  Sheila chose that instant to reappear, of course. She gave Lucy an inquisitive look as she dropped into the chair beside her.

  “Want to share? I know that look did not come from the football game.”

  Lucy was surprised to realize she did want to talk about Dex. Well, maybe not Dex exactly.

  “How long have you guys been together?” she asked, glancing to see if Karen was listening too. She was glad to discover she wasn’t.

  “We met in high school so it’s been almost twenty-two years.”

  “Wow, that’s awesome. Did you grow up here?”

  “Karen has lived her whole life in Madison, but my family moved here my freshman year in high school.”

  Lucy wanted to ask why she was the only one coming to dinner if both of their families lived locally, but maybe that wasn’t a conversation for Thanksgiving. So she asked the other question on her mind.

  “Are you guys married?”

  Sheila smiled. “We aren’t. We talked about it a few years ago and decided we liked things the way they were. We don’t need a piece of paper to tie us together. Legally we’ve done everything possible in the event of sickness or the death of either of us, so for now, at least, we aren’t interested in a ceremony.”

  “Why all the questions?” Karen asked.

  Lucy turned to include Karen in the conversation. “I don’t know. I guess I was thinking about what it takes to share your life with someone.”

  “So that was the smile you had when I walked in. Want to talk about her? Or him?”

  “Her. Definitely her.”

  “Just spill it,” Karen encouraged.

  “My job doesn’t leave a lot of room for relationships, and honestly, that’s not who I am.”

  “Not who you were. Until you met her, you mean,” Karen teased.

  Sheila gave Karen an evil glare before turning back to Lucy. “Just take it slow and you’ll know if it’s right.”

  “Well, slow shouldn’t be a problem. I don’t have a number or any way to contact her. Odds are, I won’t ever see her again.”

  “Well, that’s sad,” Karen said.

  “Or serendipitous,” Sheila chuckled. “A chance meeting on a plane.”

  “No, it’s just sad. Why didn’t you get her number?”

  Lucy shrugged. She wasn’t sure how much she wanted to reveal about her personal life. Most people wouldn’t understand and would say she used women. She didn’t want Karen and Sheila to think less of her.

  “What?” Sheila asked.

  “I left before she woke up so she couldn’t ask for my number.”

  “And now you regret that decision?” Sheila pursued.

  “I don’t know. Maybe.”

  “Do you know her name? You could Google her.”

  “Karen! That’s not the way to find out about someone,” Sheila chastised. “You have to talk and disclose stuff to see if someone is trustworthy and honest.”

  “I’m just saying you could Google to find out where she lives and stuff.”

  Lucy laughed. “I think that’s called stalking.”

  “I was just trying to help,” Karen pouted. “I search for people all the time for work. It’s easy.”

  “We know, and that’s for work.” Sheila gave her a smile as she stood. “Besides, something tells me Lucy doesn’t want to know any more about this woman. Maybe your paths will cross again. Let’s eat. I’m starving.”

  Maybe their paths would cross again. Or not.

  She helped Sheila and Karen fill the table with sides, rolls, and a huge turkey. As they were sitting down, her phone rang. A quick glance at the caller ID and she shoved it back in her pocket. She glanced up to see both women watching her.

  “My mother.”

  “Based on the look on your face that isn’t a call you want to take,” Sheila stated.

  “We aren’t really close. She’s probably only calling to say ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ and she can say that to my voice mail.”

  “Ouch,” Karen said. “Sounds like our families.”

  “I wasn’t going to ask why I’m the only one here if your families live locally.”

  Karen spoke first. “My mom passed away a few years ago, and she was the one who held my family together. My brother and sister don’t live around here anymore, and Dad was never much of a family person anyway. I visit him when I’m near his retirement village in Tampa, but mostly he hangs with his friends.”

  “My parents started traveling on holidays several years ago,” Sheila added. “They left for Hawaii last Monday and they’ll be back in about two weeks. We’ll have them over for dinner when they get back, though. I don’t have any siblings. What about you?”

  Lucy chewed slowly, giving herself a few extra seconds before she answered Sheila’s question. “No siblings. My father passed away almost twenty years ago and Mom and I grew apart. Everyone deals with grief differently, and her way was to isolate. With my job, I’m not stationary much, so I’ve never invited her to visit or anything. Not that she would come.”

  “Losing a parent that young is tough. Cancer took my mom quickly, but it was still hard.”

  “My dad was on the first plane that hit the World Trade Center on 9/11.”

  Karen was silent, but after a small gasp Sheila spoke. “Oh, Lucy. That’s horrible. Losing a parent so tragically and publicly is devastating. We’re so sorry.”

  “And I’m sorry if I forced you into that disclosure,” Karen said. “It’s not surprising to hear that a parent is deceased, but that’s certainly not the kind of story you expect.”

  “Thank you both, but I came to terms with it a long time ago. There were so many memorials and events in New York that it took a while, but when I made the decision to become an air marshal it was like I finally had closure.”

  “That’s heroic, though I’m sure you don’t look at it that way,” Sheila said.

  “I think I like you even more,” Karen added, making everyone laugh and lightening the somber mood.

  Lucy appreciated Karen and Sheila’s attempts to control the conversation for the rest of the evening. They kept her laughing with stories of how they ended up with all of their animals.

  “So, the old man was dead when we broke the door down and Bogarts was standing beside him.” Karen continued her story of how Bogarts had come to live at their house. “Turns out Bogarts had lived inside the house for most of his life. The old man had won his mother in poker game and didn’t know she was pregnant. After Bogarts was born, he sold the mother and moved the baby donkey into the house.”

  “So how long did he sleep on the screened porch?” Lucy asked, laughing.

  “At least two weeks, but in his defense he was a very good boy.”

  “He was quiet and well-behaved eve
n during meal times,” Karen added. “He didn’t start braying until we moved him outside.”

  “Does he like the pasture now?” Lucy asked.

  “He does seem to enjoy the freedom if nothing else, but make no mistake, if he gets into the yard, he comes straight to the house,” Sheila said with a chuckle. “And just to clear things up, I’m the one who put my foot down about him living in the house. The screened porch was a compromise.”

  Karen hugged Sheila as she returned from carrying dishes to the kitchen. “And Bogarts appreciated your compassion.”

  Lucy laughed again. “I feel like giving him a hug. Can I take him a carrot?”

  “Absolutely,” Sheila said, passing her one from the refrigerator.

  Lucy walked across the yard to the fence, watching Bogarts trot to meet her. She felt bad for the change he had had to endure. How was he supposed to understand why he couldn’t live in the house with people anymore? No wonder he seemed more attached to humans than to the other animals. She rubbed his nose while he nibbled on the carrot. She remembered the voice mail her mother had left earlier and pulled her phone from her pocket.

  “Lucy, I’m at the Hilton Garden Hotel in Madison until tomorrow morning. I know this is a surprise and you might not even be in town, but if you are and you get this message, I would love to see you.”

  She played the message several times. Why was her mother in Madison? And why did she want to see her? She had willingly given her address so her mother could send the housewarming gift, but that was all she had expected. Did she come here specifically to visit her? She deleted the message and slid her phone back into her pocket. She didn’t have to call her back.

  “Did she leave a message?” Karen asked as she joined her at the fence.

  “She did.”

  Karen allowed her a few seconds of thought before she prompted her. “And.”

  “She’s in Madison and wants to see me.”

  “Wow. I’m guessing by the look on your face that’s unexpected.”

  “You’re right about that. I haven’t seen her in a couple of years. She became a recluse after Dad’s death and didn’t leave her house much. I’m sorry to say I didn’t visit her either.”

  “Are you going to see her?”

  “I’m not sure.”

  “How long did she give you to decide?”

  “She leaves tomorrow.”

  “Wow. She came to town for less than twenty-four hours.”

  Lucy shrugged. “I get the feeling from her voice mail that maybe she was here for a couple of days before she called.”

  “Like she wasn’t sure she was going to reach out or that she wasn’t sure she would have time to meet with you.”

  Lucy shrugged again.

  “That’s tough.” Karen patted her arm. “Want to help me feed the animals?”

  “Sure.” She followed Karen through the gate and into the barn.

  Chapter Ten

  Lucy stared at the clock on the wall in her living room. Was nine p.m. too late to call her mother? She could already feel the niggling of regret. If her mother really did come all the way to Madison only to see her, then she owed it to both of them to make the effort. She located the Hilton’s website on her phone’s Internet browser and pressed the call button. She impatiently tapped her foot against the footstool while she waited for someone to answer. Then, she waited again while they connected her to her mother’s room. The number in her call log didn’t match the number she had dialed for the Hilton and she wondered if her mother had given in to technology. She had given up trying to convince her that cell phones didn’t cause cancer as had been predicted when they came out over twenty years ago.

  “Hello.”

  “Mom, it’s me.”

  “Lucy! I’m so glad you called. I’d almost given up.”

  The silence stretched for several seconds as she fought back the biting words hanging on the tip of her tongue. Why did you come to Madison? And why now?

  “Can I see you?” her mother asked. Her voice was soft and hesitant.

  Eileen Donovan had never been a shy woman. In her vibrant years, she gave Dale, Lucy’s dad, a run for his money. She had been a woman who spoke her mind, but always stayed more than an inch away from hurting anyone’s feelings. It was painful to think about it, but it was clear Eileen wasn’t sure if Lucy would be willing to see her or not.

  “I can meet you in the morning at the restaurant in your hotel. About ten?” she suggested, guessing that checkout was at eleven. An hour was more than enough time for her mother to say whatever she was here to say.

  “That would be perfect. I’ll see you then.”

  Her mother hung up without the usual agony that always left Lucy with a sick feeling and dreading the next call. Normally, she could hear the sadness in her mother’s voice, feeling all of the emptiness her mother carried with her. But tonight her mother had sounded good. The child in Lucy longed to go to her now. To see if her mother was really back in the shell of a body that she had been only visiting for years. She forced herself to get out of the chair and stop replaying every past visit. The fact her mother had traveled all the way to Florida from West Virginia was enough for tonight. As she wrapped herself in her flannel sheets, she prayed their visit would be everything she was hoping it could be.

  Sleep came and went throughout the night. She was exhausted from getting no sleep the previous night, but that didn’t seem to be enough to keep her from dreaming of her mother and Dex. Her mind didn’t stop churning all night and she was almost relieved to see the sun coming up. She went for a run and then sat on her porch while she sipped a mug of coffee. Her porch. It was so odd for her to have a place she called her own. A place she actually liked.

  After her shower, she slowly made her way into Madison. Less than three square miles in diameter, the town of Madison was filled with charm and heritage. She maneuvered through the streets around the newly renovated downtown area. There were many restored houses with antebellum and Victorian architecture as well as brick sidewalks lined with carriage lights. Her favorite part of the historic town was at the corner of Range Avenue and Marion Street where the Four Freedoms Monument stood. Surrounded by moss-covered oak trees, the four angels stood watch over the town. The monument was commissioned by President Roosevelt after his address to Congress on January 6, 1941. He named the four freedoms as speech and expression, worship, the freedom from want, and the freedom from fear. In 1944, in front of 60,000 people at Madison Square Garden in New York, the monument was dedicated to Madison County’s most celebrated hero. Captain Colin P. Kelly, Jr., the first United States hero of World War II. On December 10, 1941, his B-17 Flying Fortress plane had come under attack by Japanese planes as he was returning from a bombing run. Captain Kelly managed to keep the plane in the air until his crew members could parachute to safety.

  Located north of town, the Hilton Inn and Suites was only one of four hotels within a twenty-mile radius. Lucy accelerated as the stoplight in front of her switched from red to green. She was within sight of the hotel and her stomach churned with foreboding. Her anticipation at seeing her mother whole again was curbed by the fear that she had mistakenly identified the positive sounds in her mother’s voice. She parked in the hotel parking lot and entered through the side door of the restaurant, avoiding the lobby. If her mother wasn’t in here yet, then she would find her eventually. She wanted to already be sitting at the table to avoid the awkward hug that always preceded their visits. The hostess seated her in the rear of the restaurant beside the floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked a grassy area behind the hotel. The view was lovely and not something she was expecting. Pink and white azalea bushes in full bloom dotted the area along with lots of evergreen plants. The green and red leaves added even more color to the display.

  “It’s beautiful, right?”

  Lucy looked up into her mother’s face and smiled. She started to stand for a hug even though she hadn’t planned on it, but her mother took a seat befor
e she could.

  “Yes, it is beautiful.”

  “They’re called Encore Azaleas and they bloom in the spring, summer, and fall.” Eileen shrugged. “I was curious so I asked. Did you order yet?”

  “No, I told them I was waiting for you.”

  “Great. Let’s order then. I’m starved,” her mother said, opening the menu.

  Lucy opened her menu and studied her mother over it. Eileen’s eyes were bright and clear. Her dark hair looked styled and even her skin was a normal pinkish color rather than the washed-out paleness she had gotten used to. Something was certainly different.

  Their waitress approached and Lucy listened while her mother ordered scrambled eggs, bacon, potatoes, and toast. She only wanted coffee, but she heard her voice saying she would take the same. She felt like she was submerged, her mother’s voice coming to her from a distance through water. Maybe this was all a dream. She pinched her leg under the table to see if she would wake up.

  “So I guess you’re wondering why I’m here,” Eileen stated as soon as the waitress moved away.

  She wanted to find words to make her thoughts seem less condemning, but instead she only nodded. Her mother stared out the window and then took a deep breath.

  “I realized I was missing your life.”

  Lucy opened her mouth and a small squeak came out as she realized she had no idea what to say. Her mother waved a hand to silence her.

  “I’ve been in a fog for almost twenty years and I’ve missed the milestones in your life. Your graduation from college and from the marshal school, your thirtieth birthday and anything else along the way that a mother would share. I knew I couldn’t keep going like that or I was going to die alone just like your father.”

  “Oh, Mom,” Lucy finally croaked. “He wasn’t alone and you aren’t either.”

  “I was, but I’m not going to be. I’ve made some friends and I’m selling the house. I’m thinking about moving to Florida.”

  “Why?” Lucy couldn’t stop herself from asking.

  “Why am I moving to Florida or why the change?”

  “Yes.”

  “I woke up one morning a couple of months ago and realized I didn’t know where you were or when I would ever see you again. It made me very sad. Sadder even than I had been because I knew you didn’t need me in your life.” She held up her hand to stop Lucy from interrupting. “You don’t. It’s clear, but I need you. I didn’t want to be a part of your life unless I could contribute and make it better. Not drag you into my darkness. So I found a support group and I’ve been going to meetings every day. For the first time in almost twenty years, I can see life ahead of me again.”