Ties That Bind

by Heather Huffman

  “It’s very pretty.” Kate took in the tall, narrow white home sandwiched in between two more just like it.

  “I grew up here.” He slid out from behind the wheel and came around to open her door but she’d beat him to it.

  “You make it very difficult to be a gentleman,” he accused.

  “Sorry,” she shrugged. “It feels weird just sitting there waiting for someone to open a door when I’m perfectly capable of it.”

  “When you put it that way,” he frowned at her.

  “Don’t pout. I still appreciate the gesture,” she assured him. “And I’ll let you carry my bag for me.”

  “Thank you,” he accepted the concession. “And you might want to brace yourself.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?” Kate eyed him warily.

  “Just don’t be nervous and you’ll be fine.”

  “You’re making me nervous.”

  Kate heard the deep rumble that she assumed was a bark, followed by another. Ah. His parents had dogs. She wasn’t afraid of dogs, why would she be nervous?

  And then the door opened and she watched two of the largest canines she’d ever seen greet Gavin enthusiastically before turning to greet her warily.

  “The blue one is Samson. The gold one is Delilah. They’re Neapolitan Mastiffs,” he introduced her to the great brutes that made Ty look like a Chihuahua.

  “Wrinkly little guys, aren’t they?” She held her hand out to allow them to smell her.

  “Very. And watch the drool.”

  “Lovely.” Kate wrinkled her nose.

  “They have towels by their dishes in the kitchen. If it gets too bad, you can wipe them off.”

  “Good to know.”

  “Come on,” he grinned at her reaction. “Let’s get you set up in the guest room.”

  “Do you still have a room here?” She asked, blushing when she realized what he was probably thinking. “I’d like to see it, I mean. Not to stay in or anything.”

  “Of course not.” She could tell he was biting the inside of his lip to keep from laughing. How rude. “And my room is this first one on the right.”

  They’d climbed a flight of stairs and he opened the door to a small room that was what Kate would consider a disaster area.

  “How do you function?” She marveled as she stepped through the door. “I’d be completely claustrophobic in this.”

  He ignored the question, choosing to instead study her in silence while she took in the mementos scattered around the room. He seemed to be almost trying to get inside her head to gauge her reaction as she soaked in pieces of his past.

  “You live a very full life,” her eyes flicked across his and she gave him a little smile. “And you have a very happy family.”

  “That’s a good description,” he agreed. “Now can I feed you some dinner or do you just want to go to sleep?”

  “Sleep,” she answered instantly. “Actually, shower then sleep.”

  “I can arrange that,” he held his hand out for her. “Come on, then.”

  The shower felt delicious, better than any shower Kate had ever experienced. Her cotton pajamas felt even better. The cool sheets furthered her bliss.

  “You get some rest,” he went to kiss her on the forehead. “We’ll go back to the hospital tomorrow after breakfast.”

  “Stay,” she caught his hand as he turned to go. “Hold me while I sleep. Just for a little while.”

  Kate couldn’t explain why but she was suddenly near panic at the thought of him walking out the door. Without realizing it, she held her breath waiting for his reply, her eyes beseeching his.

  He nodded once, then kicked his shoes off and climbed into the bed with her. Had she any energy left, it might have been a dangerous proposition. As it was, the warmth of his embrace and the gentle lullaby he sang in her ear carried her quickly into a deep sleep.

  Kate woke up the next morning and was instantly aware of two things. First, Gavin was no longer beside her and his absence left a void. Second, someone had made bacon. She quickly dressed and scurried downstairs, her stomach protesting loudly the absence of dinner.

  He looked up when she entered. Their eyes met and they broke into simultaneous smiles. Kate felt like they were in on a secret the rest of the world just wouldn’t understand. She wanted to throw herself into his arms and greet him with a passionate kiss – the kind that made all sorts of promises. Instead, she offered a soft, “Hello.”

  “Good morning,” he finished serving up the eggs in the skillet, setting it aside so he could grab her for just such a kiss. He didn’t let her go until her head was spinning; then he reinforced the message with his eyes.

  Why did this man love her so? It was surreal. Had she ever felt so irrevocably linked to another human? What would her mother have said about him?

  “When did you abandon me?” Was the first coherent thought she could voice.

  “Only to make breakfast,” he promised. “Not that you would have noticed. You were sound asleep.”

  “Sorry,” she blushed, accepting the plate he handed her.

  “Don’t be. I’m glad you got some rest.”

  “Thanks for making breakfast.”

  “It’s the least I can do – the plan is to spend the whole day at the hospital.” He looked a little apologetic.

  “I hadn’t planned on sightseeing,” she assured him. “I’m here to be wherever you need me for the next couple of days.”

  “What did Jack say?”

  “I missed his initial response; the girls beat me to it. But he told me to take my time – as long as I was back by Wednesday anyway.”

  “About that,” Gavin frowned thoughtfully.

  “Yes?” Kate eyed him warily over a forkful of eggs.

  “I don’t suppose you’d be interested in sticking around for a while?”

  “You know I can’t do that to Jack,” she shook her head.

  “It was worth a shot.”

  “You are coming back to San Francisco, aren’t you?” A touch of panic laced her voice.

  “Absolutely.” He must have sensed her panic, because his voice became soothing and he stopped eating to take her hand and place a kiss on the back of it. “You are completely and totally stuck with me now.”

  “But you’ll be staying for a while?” Kate guessed.

  “A while. I want to be sure Mum really is okay.”

  “I understand,” Kate nodded. She did understand, but that didn’t stop her heart from aching just a little at the thought of his prolonged absence.

  “I was supposed to be their wedding photographer; I’ve arranged for a friend of mine to take over. Jack wasn’t happy, but he’ll get over it. I did promise to be back by the launch party, though.”

  Kate mulled that over for a minute. September. Two months. She could handle two months of anything.

  “You know,” she flashed him a reassuring smile. “I think this will be really good for us.”

  “Really?”

  “It’ll give us a chance to get to know each other better without all of this pesky chemistry getting in the way.”

  “I happen to like the pesky chemistry.”

  “I didn’t say I don’t like it. I’m just trying to look at the bright side.”

  “A regular Pollyanna,” he shook his head.

  “We’ll be like pen pals,” she went on enthusiastically, ignoring his last comment.

  “Oh, why not?” He caught on to her playful mood.

  They ate the rest of their breakfast and were soon on the way back to the hospital. Kate wondered how she’d spend a whole day talking to a virtual stranger. Or was she expected to sit in silence?

  She wished she had a book or her laptop to keep her busy. She figured she could kill half an hour calling Jessica and Liz for updates. Maybe more if she called them separately. Maybe once at 10 o’clock and once at 2 o’clock. But what time would it be in San Francisco then? She tried to do the math but couldn’t remember. She’d just have to hope it wasn�
��t something obnoxious like 2 a.m.

  It turned out that she didn’t need to find ways to occupy her day. Ellen drifted in and out of sleep, the rest of Gavin’s family came and went, and Kate spent most of her day with her feet propped on Gavin’s lap talking to him about anything and everything. They had a lifetime to catch up on and an entire day to do it.

  “He was such a cute kid,” Ellen joined the conversation. “That saved his life often.”

  “Mum, she doesn’t need to hear about that.”

  “Oh, I think I do,” Kate disagreed quickly. “Do go on.”

  “I don’t even know where to start,” Ellen began with a smile that hinted at a dimple. “He was always into something, always pushing the boundaries.”

  “Some things never change,” Kate smirked. “He’s still doing that. Then using his mouth to get himself out of trouble. It’s astonishing, the things he can do with that mouth of his.”

  Gavin’s eyebrow shot up and Kate blushed.

  “Oh. I didn’t mean that how it sounded. I meant the lip twitch or the lopsided grin or the pout,” she hurriedly explained. “He’s completely mastered them all and I fall for it every time.”

  “Good to know,” he rewarded her with the lopsided grin in question.

  “Like you didn’t already,” she made a face at him.

  “I know exactly what you’re talking about. Heaven help the person he decides to use the pout-puppy dog eyes combo on.”

  “Oh, I know that one. It’s brutal,” Kate agreed enthusiastically. “I’ve had good luck countering it with the ‘You’ve got to be kidding’ glare. I throw in an eyebrow arch for good measure.”

  “You’re a natural. It took me years to come up with the eyebrow arch.”

  “Thanks,” Kate acknowledged with a flush.

  “This is dangerous, isn’t it?” Gavin eyed them warily.

  “I think it’s delightful,” Ellen smiled at him, reaching for his hand.

  “Then it’s worth every trick I lose,” Gavin took her hand and kissed it gently. His eyes glowed with such love and devotion, it made Kate want to cry. Being around Gavin and his mother made her miss her own so much it felt like her heart was in a vise.

  “Excuse me for a second,” Kate said softly, leaving as unobtrusively and quickly as possible. She couldn’t worry about Gavin’s concerned gaze now; she was too close to losing her grip on her emotions. When she reached the bathroom, she let the tears go.

  Sitting on the bathroom floor, her back to the wall and tears streaming down her cheeks, she let the memories come flooding back. It was odd, here in a setting so close to the memories she’d been trying to repress, the ones she’d longed for rose to the surface.

  Suddenly she could hear her mama’s voice again – the way it was before. Like when she would assure Kate it had been just a dream, or one failed test wouldn’t end her high school career, or that she would love again.

  She remembered the sound of her mother’s laughter, gentle as a brook. She remembered the smell of roses that seemed to cling to her mother’s soft skin. And that smile, that smile that had been a ray of sunshine able to pierce the darkest cloud over Kate’s life.

  Most days, it had been okay that she didn’t have a dad because she had always been wrapped so securely in the cocoon of her mother’s love. Sure, there were times like the father-daughter dances or Dad’s Day at school where his absence smacked a bit. But even then, her mama had always found a way to compensate.

  Now, having fallen in love herself, Kate began to get a sense of how much her mother had given for her. Knowing her mom’s moral standings, she never would have gotten pregnant if she hadn’t at least thought she loved Jack. What had made her leave? Why had she never even tried to date again? Had she loved Jack that much, or was it something else? Either way, her sweet mama had bravely faced the world alone and created a world for Kate to flourish in. How very evil of cancer to tear that world apart.

  So it was there, in the bathroom of the oncology floor of London Bridge Hospital, that Kate mourned her own lost battle. She couldn’t be sure how long she’d been in there when Nicole poked her head in the bathroom.

  “There you are. Gavin’s beside himself worrying about you.”

  “Sorry,” Kate stood and busied herself trying to look presentable. “It just hit me all of a sudden. I started missing my mom so much.”

  “I’m surprised you made it this long.” Nicole hugged Kate, taking her a bit by surprise. “It hasn’t been that long since you lost her.”

  Of course Gavin had told his family her story; Kate assumed as much, but it seemed strange to be sharing this personal moment with someone she barely knew. Gavin seemed determined to break down all kinds of Kate’s walls.

  “Can you tell him I’m okay, that I’ll be out in a minute?” Kate gave her what she hoped was a reassuring smile.

  “Sure, sure,” Nicole nodded and went to relay the message. Kate washed her face and ran her fingers through her hair. There wasn’t much else she could do with no brush and no makeup. It would have to be enough.

  She walked right into Gavin when she left the ladies’ room. He instantly engulfed her in a protective embrace and wouldn’t let her go. She thought of protesting out of embarrassment, but the truth was, it was right where she wanted to be.

  “I’m sorry, I’m not trying to make today about me,” she wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her faced against his chest.

  “No one thinks you are,” he promised. “I’m sorry to put you through this. A stronger man would send you home rather than expect you to sit in the cancer ward of a hospital.”

  “No, this is where I want to be. And I’m glad it all bubbled up to the surface like that. I remember her now,” Kate lifted her face so he could see she meant it. “It’s not just a nightmare haunting me, I remember her. The good stuff. The sacrifices she made so I’d be happy. I think wherever she is now, she’s really happy about us.”

  “Good. Because I’m crazy in love you with. I’m glad I have your mum’s approval.” He brushed his lips across hers. His eyes said he’d love to do more than that. An irritated cough disrupted their moment.

  “Excuse me,” a woman gestured to the door behind them, the look on her face not a happy one.

  “Whoops, sorry,” Kate couldn’t help the giggle that escaped as they scooted to the side as one.

  “I’ve created a monster,” Gavin shook his head woefully. “Breaking social mores left and right.”

  “Quite the rebel,” she agreed solemnly. “Should we go back?”

  “Nah, Dad’s back. Let’s grab a bite to eat and give them some time alone. We’ll come back for a bit later.”

  Kate realized she was hungry. She had no sense of time, but she did know breakfast was long gone.

  Chapter Eleven

  Devon and Nicole joined them for dinner. Kate ordered fish and chips because it seemed the thing to do. Devon and Nicole appeared to be having a dispute amongst themselves.

  “I say we let Kate decide,” he finally announced, earning a kick under the table.

  “Let Kate decide what?” She looked at Devon expectantly.

  “Do you want to know what I’ve found out about your family so far?”

  “I told you today isn’t the day,” Nicole hissed.

  “But she won’t be here much longer,” he argued.

  “And you can’t email her?” Nicole persisted.

  “I could, but I’d rather tell her in person.” He met her mutinous glare with one of his own. Kate couldn’t be certain, but she had the feeling that if they weren’t in a crowded restaurant, this would be the point at which they tore each others’ clothes off.

  “I’d very much like to know what you’ve found,” she gave Nicole an apologetic look. She felt a little traitorous, but she did want to know.

  “Fine,” Nicole shrugged, letting go of it just like that. Devon pulled a file out of Nicole’s bag and tossed it to Kate, who opened it with trembling fingers.

/>   “Your grandparents were Francis and Isabelle Williams. Your mother, Danielle Williams, was their oldest daughter. Joan Williams was her younger sister. Have you met your Aunt Joan?”

  “A couple of times. She and my mother were estranged. I saw her briefly at the funeral.”

  “You haven’t asked her what happened?”

  “It didn’t seem right. Not without knowing why they were estranged or what she knew about Jack. I guess I didn’t know how to approach her, really.” Kate admitted. It did sound silly that she hadn’t even tried asking her aunt for information before moving to San Francisco.

  “You’re aunt moved to Albuquerque after your mother did. Your family was originally from San Francisco. Well, Napa anyway.”

  “Really?” Kate frowned.

  “The only thing I can figure is Joan wanted to be near her sister. Or maybe you.”

  “Then why would Mom keep her away?”

  “You’d have to ask Joan that,” Nicole interjected.

  “She’s back in Napa now,” Gavin told her quietly. “I can go with you when I get back if you’d like.”

  “Thank you,” Kate nodded in a haze. Did she want to wait that long? She’d decide that later. “Why did she move back?”

  “Well, you’re in San Francisco now,” Nicole suggested.

  “She’d really uproot her life just to follow me?”

  “You’re family. And you’re the only family she has now,” Devon shrugged. Kate could tell that to him, it was all the explanation needed. That was a view foreign to Kate. Family meant her mom, and her mom was gone. Until Gavin, she’d never known anyone else she’d walk through fire for.

  “Does that mean that my grandparents are gone?”

  “They died six months apart, about five years ago,” Devon confirmed.

  “So they were alive for most of my life and I never got to meet them,” Kate was saddened at the knowledge.

  “Another question for Joan, I’m sure.”

  “So who were they?”

  “Your grandparents? Apparently quite the socialites. That could be why she moved. Young single mother wasn’t good for social status.” Devon looked apologetically at Kate.

  “True,” Kate agreed. It had never dawned on her before that her mother had given up more than Jack all those years ago. “I wonder–should I be angry with her for robbing me of a family, or grateful to her for protecting me from something?”