Cloak of Deceit: An Alex Moore Novel
Page 16
When the fire died out, a series of loud claps echoed from behind me. I whirled on my heel to see Monique standing by the chamber door. She hadn’t stepped over the inhibitor line yet, but still, I should have heard or at least smelled her. Was it because I’d been so focused on my other powers? Maybe my psychic abilities and Undead senses were mutually exclusive. Julian would have been disappointed I’d let her sneak up on me. I wanted to have a better handle on things by the time he came back, so that maybe next time he’d have less of a reason to leave me behind.
“Very good.” Monique’s smile was cat-like. “I’m impressed, Alex. For a beginner, you show much promise.”
I threw out my hip as she approached, wanting to shoot back that as a beginner I could do more than she could ever dream of. But I held my tongue. For one thing, I had no idea what she could or couldn’t do. And for another, she was still my keeper, collar or not, until Julian got back.
“But moving bricks is only a small part of what it is to be what you are.” She glided towards me. Her curtain of black hair fell in seductive waves over her slender shoulders, taunting me with all the feminine appeal I could never hope to possess.
“It is not the mastering of what is outside, but of what is inside the self that is the true challenge.” Monique held my gaze as she stepped over the faint purple line on the floor. Her challenge remained unspoken.
I nodded in understanding as high-noon music sounded in my head.
She cast me a dazzling, feral smile. “You have a grasp now of where your psychic center is.”
I was pretty sure I knew what she meant. The part of my mind I used to control the objects in the room, the new part I was just getting accustomed to, she called the “psychic center.” I made a note of the term.
As Monique circled around me, the bricks lay in a helpless heap behind her, and I realized no matter what she had planned, my magic tricks really were small potatoes. There was something about her stance, the confidence she exuded. The amusement in her bi-colored eyes gave me a clue I was in for a real lesson. And it was gonna hurt.
I narrowed my eyes and tried my best to penetrate Monique’s aura with my psychic senses, but just like before, my mind clouded, like trying to see under murky water. I frowned and shook my head to clear it.
Monique laughed, velvety smooth. “Of course I would not leave myself open to intrusion. In a position such as mine, vulnerability could cost many lives.”
So, she did do it on purpose.
“It’s not because you have something to hide?” I countered, turning to keep from having my back to her.
“I have something to protect,” she said in her silken French accent.
I shrugged. “Don’t we all?”
“You have no idea what the Grigori are capable of. They are shapeless. Boundless. Limitless. They can see your deepest desires and your darkest fears, and will use them against you.” She finished her side-stepping around me and squared off. “Without mercy.”
“You sound like you know from experience.” Fabulous. Not only did I have to deal with Julian’s jealous ex-girlfriend, but I had the extra treat of suffering for her baggage about whatever the Grigori had done to her in the past. Nice of him to mention that.
Monique cocked her head. “I know you have been lucky. You have not had to face their true nature. Yet.”
I took offense to that. I had been more up close and personal with the Grigori than she could fathom. How about facing them as a tangible force of darkness in my own mind? Monique made it sound like it was all sunshine and daisies. She was the one without a clue. She didn’t have them reaching inside her, whispering her name, hunting her, waiting for an opportunity to rise up and smother her. “I’ve seen enough.”
“Well then,” she said, “try to keep me out. Try to shield your mind from me. From someone with no exceptional psychic powers, it should be easy, non?”
I don’t respond well to dares. It’s a character flaw — I can admit that — but it’s true. And Monique already pushed some of my hothead-buttons without even trying. All I had to do was picture the glitter in her eyes when she looked at Julian. Inside the chamber, without my collar, everything was fair game, and she was giving me an opportunity to prove I wasn’t just the clueless Pollyanna she obviously thought I was.
I nodded, my face set in a grim smile. I had barely completed the motion when visions, glimpses, and memories that weren’t mine slammed into me. Pictures of Monique and Julian: times of happiness, tenderness, passion. A thousand intimate moments flooded through my mind. I didn’t hear myself cry out. My stomach clenched, sour with grief. I doubled over, tears blurring my vision. I could taste Monique’s satisfaction in the back of my throat, hot, bitter, and tormenting.
I looked up to the window of the chamber to see only Ian and Dawn’s faces, pale and rigid with concern. Carl was missing.
“Bitch,” I spat, not caring if they heard. What the hell was she playing at?
“Come now, Alex. I’m only trying to teach you a lesson. You must have better control of your emotions.” Monique tossed her long hair over one shoulder in a don’t-hate-me-’cause-I’m-beautiful move.
Anger coiled inside of me like a fiery snake. I half-expected to exhale smoke. “Isn’t that the pot calling the kettle black? You hate that Julian wants to sponsor me.”
Her lashes fluttered slightly, but her expression was stony. “He is very dear to me. I want to make sure he puts his faith in the right place.”
I wrung my hands at my sides. “And that could never be a Grigori? Or never be anyone but you?”
She gave no outward sign of emotion, but the grey haze around her cleared for a moment to reveal a slash of blaring red. I smiled and twisted the knife. “Or is it just that he wouldn’t have to leave me? That we’d have an eternity together?”
“Ungrateful, insolent girl!” She said it like a curse. Her thoughts came stomping through my head again, more aggressively. This time, I was ready. I caught them in the web coalescing in my mind, and snapped them right back at her. I put every ounce of my own anger behind the wallop. I hadn’t realized I was so angry until that moment, when it blasted from me in a white-hot wash. I was furious. At her, at Julian, at Cody, the Cloak. The injustice!
I thrust it all at Monique, wanting her to hurt for me.
The field around us shimmered with purple energy. The concrete under my feet started to shake. I held on, forcing the tiny chink in her armor into a gaping tear. My awareness narrowed to encompass only my adversary, and it didn’t matter why anymore. Her screams made the sweetest music.
Monique fell to her knees, crying and yanking her hair, but I continued to sandblast her mind. The grey-brown coating her aura flitted away in visible pieces, like old parchment, revealing the raw, pulsing crimson underneath.
The ground shifted beneath my feet, and my body went rigid as my vision faded to black around the edges.
Black was bad.
I was supposed to be safe from them inside the chamber. I tried to let go, to pull back and rein in the storm of fury I’d conjured. But the wave of whispers was already building inside of me.
Oh, fuck.
I floundered for a moment, dangling between two realities. The voices pulled me into their mental sludge, even as I fell to the ground and clawed for something real to hang on to. Still, more voices funneled through me into Monique, sucking her into the black hole with me.
“Stop this! Now!” Julian roared in my face.
I swallowed my panicked tears and blinked at his agonized expression. No sound would come out of my mouth. My head felt like it would bust open with the pressure inside, pop like a balloon.
Where had he come from?
Julian bounced in my vision while he shook me. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
The link I had to Monique snapped away like a sheet in the wind.
I took in a deep, ragged breath. “I…I’m sorry.”
I stared at him, wide-eyed. In that moment,
I was. So, so sorry. I hadn’t meant to hurt Monique. I hadn’t meant to expose us to the collective. Again. I’d only wanted to make a point. Just then, I couldn’t even remember what it had been.
“I’m sorry.” I gulped in air. Each inhalation of the anguish filling the room suffocated. I’d only wanted to prove I could hold my own. It seemed like the harder I tried to impress people, the more I screwed up.
Julian’s face was grim and colorless, his gaze closed to me as he squeezed my arms in a vise-like pinch. He shoved me back and whirled on his heel to drop beside Carl, who knelt next to a sobbing Monique, splayed on the floor like a dropped puppet.
I’m sorry, I thought, climbing to my feet. I felt nauseous and beat-up, but looking at Monique, I’d come out of our battle on the winning end. If proving everyone’s worst fears about my nature to be true could be considered winning. My eyes shot to the booth window. Dawn’s face was pale, her hand covering her mouth. Ian just looked overwhelmed. My un-beating heart froze solid in my chest.
So much for making friends.
I wished I could disappear. They probably did too.
Julian and Carl ignored me as they scraped Monique from the floor, lifting her to her feet. She sagged between them. I took a step forward to offer help, but Julian shot me a flinty glare over his shoulder.
“Put that collar back on and wait in your room.” His voice was like gravel. “We need to talk.”
I stood rooted to my spot on the floor, paralyzed with the knowledge that whatever it was Julian wanted to say to me now, it couldn’t be good. Why did he always have a knack for showing up to catch me at my worst?
I didn’t report to my room right away. I wasn’t ready to face Julian’s wrath. I needed time to clear my head and to brace myself for what would come next. I’d gone too far. I should have known better. I had only proved Monique right — I should have had better control of my emotions. They set off powers left and right, Undead and psychic, and I had no control over any of them.
She had nothing to do with the rotten twist of luck that had brought me there. The responsibility fell squarely on my shoulders. I was the one who followed Cody around like the groupie of the year. I’d been looking for trouble, and it found me.
Could I blame Monique for not trusting me? Obviously, I deserved it. She loved Julian, and I…was costing him so much, hurting the people he cared about.
That’s it. You’ve blown it now.
Doubt and regret barraged me from every direction, screaming at me that dying hadn’t taught me a damn thing. I was still making the same mistakes as before — alienating the people I loved, diving in without care for consequences. This time, they would be severe. My vision wavered at the memory of Julian’s expression. The shock. The hurt.
So instead of waiting in my cell for sentencing, I put on my collar and retreated to the only place in my prison that wasn’t oppressive — the rooftop.
The steel door creaked behind me as I stepped into the open air, tinged with the recycled ocean waters of Puget Sound. The sky above was a uniform metallic grey. Low clouds blocked out the stars. Streetlights surrounding the building cast orange-tinged shadows on the rain-slicked brick ledge. I pressed my palms to the cold stone and filled my lungs with dank, chilly night.
If only I could freeze time. Put the world on hold while I gathered myself together for Julian’s coming onslaught. Why couldn’t I get a cool power like that? Instead of the ability to kill or maim people without meaning to. Julian was furious. Rightfully so. I didn’t let myself entertain the worst possible scenario. He’d been forgiving up to that point, but how far could I really push? He’d said he wouldn’t put Monique and her charges at risk, even for me. I believed him. It wasn’t on purpose, but I kept forcing him to re-draw his lines. How many more times could I push him?
“This is such a mess.” I spoke into the rusted sky.
“It’s not so bad, sweetheart,” a voice said from the shadows.
With a cringe, I schooled my face as Ian wheeled up behind me. I glanced over my shoulder and offered him a half-hearted smile. “That’s twice you’ve snuck up on me.”
“This time shouldn’t count. I had an unfair advantage.” He looked past me out to the sea of low warehouse rooftops, and sighed. A little more hopeless and it would have captured exactly how I felt.
“How did you get up here?” I asked, eyeing him sideways.
“Service elevator.” He leaned his elbows on the brick ledge. “I’m here most nights, unless it’s raining.”
I nodded and then squinted at him. I’d come up to the roof the past three nights, and hadn’t seen him. “Have you seen me up here before?”
Ian smiled, and that was answer enough.
I snorted. “Peeping Tom.”
“Hey now, you’re the one with Undead senses. I thought you knew and were just playing along.”
I chuckled at that, and then shivered as a cold wind blew over us. “I’m surprised you’d come again, after what happened tonight.”
“You don’t scare me.” Ian reached over and covered my hand with his. His voice was low and gentle, not his usual teasing lilt.
“That makes one of us.” I sighed. “Julian is pissed. Not exactly the homecoming I’d hoped to give him.”
Ian nodded. “He has a short fuse, but it burns out fast. He’ll come ‘round.”
“I’m not so sure. I don’t think I’ve ever seen his eyes so wild.” Julian was always so controlled. The fact that I had made him slip wasn’t a good sign.
“I don’t think he’s so much angry as afraid,” Ian offered.
I turned and sank against the ledge. “I don’t want people to be afraid of me.”
“I didn’t say he was afraid of you. Afraid for you, for Monique, for all of us. Did I ever tell you how I ended up in this chair?” he asked, swinging around to face me.
“No,” I said softly, looking him up and down. I’d never had the guts to ask, and eventually, I’d stopped seeing the chair. It was just a part of Ian. His personality was so vibrant you forgot about his legs.
“I worked in a government lab, doing brain wave manipulation research. We had a subject from a local mental institution. I didn’t know it then, but she was a Grigori. Young, though. Not fully come into her powers. Others came to retrieve her.” He slapped his leg. “Just in the wrong place at the wrong time, really. One of the Force Agents tossed me against the counter. Hit it just right to break my back.”
“I’m sorry.” I gulped back my tears. If his story was supposed to make me feel better, I was still waiting for the punch line. So, I was the same as the people who had paralyzed him. Seemed like all we did was hurt people. Was that all I was good for anymore?
“No worries. I was the lucky one. They killed the others, trashed the lab. But Julian saved me. He carried me out of the lab before it burned down around me, brought me here.”
“Julian?” I frowned. “Why?”
Ian looked over my head, seeking the answers in the steam rising between the sodden buildings. He leaned in to whisper conspiratorially. “He’s got a bit of a hero complex.”
It was so unexpected that when he turned his dour face back to me, I burst out laughing. “Ya think?”
Ian finally shrugged and set his hands back on the arms of his chair. “He’s an odd one. He can be hard as stone. A ruthless warrior. I know — I’ve seen him in action. But when it comes down to it, I think he tries to see the best in people, to give them a chance. Why else would he hang out with such a band of misfits?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” I wiped my face. “Are you trying to say he’ll forgive me?”
“Who wouldn’t forgive you the world, sweetheart?” Ian winked up at me with his usual teasing grin. It was like the first breath after the plunge, buoying me up out of my self-pity. I bent down and wrapped my arms around him. He was warm, and familiar, and…grabbing my ass. All was right with the world.
I laughed as I stood up. “Are you going back down?”
�
�In a bit.” He smiled and tilted his head up to the sky. “Think the stars might come out yet.”
“Think you might wanna sneak up on me again tomorrow night?” I asked.
He smirked. “That could be arranged.”
As I left Ian on the roof, a bit of my confidence drained back out of me. Sure, what he’d said might be true. But he hadn’t been there to see the accusation in Julian’s face, to hear the threat in his voice. I had. It made my toes numb just thinking about it. At least now I felt more ready to face it. I knew I hadn’t lost all my friends, or at least not Ian. It gave me some hope.
My room was empty when I reached it. I paced for a few minutes, until the four brightly-painted walls seemed to be shrinking in on me, and then I decided to go and seek Julian out. I had a good idea of where to find him. After what had happened, Monique would be his first concern. I swept silently through the halls to her chambers, wondering what I would say. Apologize, of course. A small part of me still didn’t want to. She had asked for it, after all. But saying that wouldn’t get me anywhere. Not when she was the one who’d collapsed into a sobbing mess. I had no idea what sort of damage I’d done to her, or if it was permanent.
The outer door was wide open when I got to her office, so I slipped in to the beige greatroom. There were voices coming from one of the inner rooms, and I inched toward the door, wondering if maybe it would be best to turn back and wait, as Julian had asked. But my patience lost the match with my curiosity every time. Even if he were only going to rail on me, I’d rather he do it sooner than later. Not knowing where we stood was killing me.
I lifted my hand to knock, and then the mumble of voices became actual words, and I froze, not breathing.
“If not under orders from the Cloak, then who was Derek working for?” Monique’s voice was still thready and hoarse.