by Amber Garr
The next few days seemed to drag on through a haze of sadness and disbelief. Harlan Matthew had apparently died before he even fell to the floor. The doctors declared it a stroke and assured Kain that his death was quick and painless. I doubted those words brought any sort of comfort to my friend. His dad was gone and once that realization sunk in, he had a whole other set of obligations to deal with.
We left Florida early the next morning. I was flying back to California and Kain was accompanying his father to Massachusetts for a private family burial. He and I didn’t speak much at all after that night. I stayed near his side, helping him fend off the well-wishers and offering my silent support. He didn’t cry, didn’t get angry; he just moved like a robot. Our friends stayed out of the way, providing only passing glances to show how sad they were for Kain.
He held my hand the entire flight from Key West to Miami, and when we had to part ways in the airport, he kissed my forehead and thanked me for being there with him. Tears rolled down my cheeks as he walked through the corridor toward his own connecting flight, never once showing any sign of emotion on his face. I worried about him, but knew his family would meet him in Boston. We would see each other again in another week or so when they held a memorial service in California for all of the clans.
I felt numb and overwhelmed which made my nearly five hour flight home seem too short. Not once did I think about crashing and burning. Instead, my eyes welled up each time I remembered Kain singing to me just a few days before. Both of my parents picked me up at the airport and the ride to our house remained silent and tense.
I didn’t want to talk about anything so their multitude of questions went unanswered. Eventually, they realized that they weren’t going to get anywhere and gave me a reprieve for the rest of the afternoon. I refused dinner, even when they sent my sister in to coax me downstairs. Tomorrow would be a better day, so locking myself in a room for a few more hours sounded like a good plan.
In the middle of the night, my phone began to vibrate under my pillow. Sleepily, I tried to make my fingers move to read the message. Brendan. I hadn’t even called him since I got in and I scolded myself for being so inconsiderate.
You up? He asked. Deciding that I needed to hear his voice, I called instead of texting him back. He answered right away.
“Evs, I miss you,” he greeted me and I immediately began to cry. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
We talked for over an hour. I first explained Harlan’s passing and the events of the last twenty-four hours, and soon the sharing eased the pain in my heart so I could tell him about the fun stuff that happened as well, like the reef trip and the dancing competition. Hearing his voice was the biggest comfort for me and no one else in the world could provide that serenity.
Toward the end of the conversation he sighed and asked, “Can we meet tomorrow?”
“Of course. I don’t know what I’ll have to do here, but I’m sure I can escape for a while.”
He laughed at that and replied, “I know that you can.” I smiled. “Why don’t you come to my place in the afternoon? I’ll pick you up around three.”
“Sounds good,” I murmured and realized that sleep was quickly devouring me. My heart felt at peace for a while and my body relaxed. With the phone still in my hand, I fell into a dreamless slumber.
It was late morning before I pulled myself out of bed and into the shower. Dressed and descending down the stairs, I heard my parents on the phone, each talking briskly and making a variety of plans. When my mother saw me, she told the person on the other end to hold on and walked over to give me a giant hug. No words, just physical contact, but it was enough for me to know she was grieving too.
I poured myself some cereal and forced the food down. Clinking my spoon against the edge of the bowl, I stared out the window. Today I still felt sad, but it was for Kain and his family. Harlan had been a good man who wanted only the best for his son. I thought about his visit to our room before the ball and about how truly pleased he was to have me as his daughter-in-law. My stomach twisted in guilty knots again, so I pushed the bowl away before the smell of milk made me too nauseous.
“Not hungry?” my father asked pulling out a chair next to me.
“No.”
My mother sat down on the opposite side across from my father, flanking me with parental concern. “You should eat. You’re going to need to keep your strength up,” she chided.
I snapped my head up to look at her. “What are you talking about?” My tone must have been a little sharp because my father placed his hand on top of mine and patted it until I focused on him.
“You’re going to be a vital part of the upcoming ceremonies and I imagine your fiancé is going to need you now more than ever.”
I sighed and asked my mother, “What is going to happen now?”
“Well, the Matthews will have a private burial on the east coast tomorrow, but they’re coming out here at the end of the week. Friday will be the memorial, Saturday will be Kain’s appointment ceremony, and then…” Her voice faltered slightly and she cleared her throat while looking at my dad. “And then on Sunday, you and Kain will be married.”
My dad’s hand clamped down on mine anticipating a negative reaction. I suddenly couldn’t breathe. The wedding had been moved up by a week and I would have to marry a clan leader. Kain did need me to be there for him both as a friend and as a partner. Even the childish, angry side of me couldn’t argue that point. I let out the breath I’d sucked in.
“Where?”
“Where what?” my mother asked, looking at me with curious eyes.
“Where will all of this happen? All of the ceremonies?”
She still stared at me with trepidation and suspicion. “Here. Everything will happen here.”
I nodded my head. Everyone would come to our clan house and everyone would be expecting me to marry Kain. This wasn’t the way my life was supposed to go. “What about my birthday?” It would now be the day after the wedding.
“We’ll celebrate on Monday. My baby girl…eighteen, married, and leading a clan.” My dad shook his head and smiled. “You’re growing up so fast.” He and my mother shared a moment between them that made my stomach ache again.
I stood up and took the cereal bowl to the sink. “I’ll be in my room.”
“You can have today, but the rest of the week you’ll be with me preparing for the ceremonies,” my mother stated. Preparing meant dress fittings, speech memorizations, and a lot of lessons on what not to do or not to say.
“Sounds fun,” I mumbled under my breath as I trudged upstairs. As soon as I was out of sight, both of my parents got back on the phone coordinating the big weekend. This was going to be a spectacle and an affair to remember, that was for sure. No doubt, my mother and her friends planned to hire the best caterers and the most expensive dress makers around.
I took a nap to help pass the time between my breakfast and when Brendan would pick me up. We certainly had a lot to discuss. Since my parents said that today was my free day, I didn’t ask if I could go out with my boyfriend. When he arrived outside, I simply waved goodbye and told them I’d be back for dinner. Closing the door as fast as I could, I didn’t even give them an opportunity to yell after me. Brendan laughed when I jumped in his car and told him to take off like I’d just robbed a bank.
We picked up milkshakes at a nearby drive through and parked under the deck of his second story apartment. His roommate was at work, and since we usually met someplace where we could swim together, I realized that I hadn’t been to his place in a while. It was still messy and stinky, and I made a mental note that I might have to set some cleaning rules when we move in together.
That thought made my heart flutter.
I followed him to his bedroom. He plopped down on the bed, which was nicely made up, and patted a spot next to him. We’d been together for years, and although we’d played around, our relationship had not moved to that next and final level yet. So I knew this was a gesture of comfort, not nec
essarily of need. Putting my milkshake on the bedside table, I sat down and snuggled up against Brendan’s warm, tall body. We stayed like that for several minutes before he broke the silence.
“So what’s going to happen now that Kain is the heir?” he asked.
I explained what I knew of the appointment ceremonies and what I thought my role would be. And then I told him that they moved up the wedding date and waited anxiously for his response. Considering his girlfriend needed to continue to play fiancée for the rest of the week, Brendan was surprisingly supportive and unaffected.
“Don’t worry about the wedding,” he said while smoothing my hair as I nestled my head against his stomach. “We’re leaving Saturday night.” My reaction got a chuckle out of him before he continued. “I can see you’re excited.”
I smiled from ear to ear and my relief momentarily trumped the guilt I felt over abandoning Kain on our wedding day. But I didn’t have a choice. I was meant to be with Brendan. “Yes, I’m excited!” I leaned over and kissed him. “Is everything arranged?”
“Yes. We’re going to Maryland. I’ve been able to line up a temporary job and I closed my accounts yesterday in preparation. We’ll have to stay at a hotel for the first few weeks, but I think as soon as you’re eighteen, you’ll be able to find a job too.” He squeezed me in a tight embrace. “We’re going to make this work.”
“We are, aren’t we?” I asked and he laughed again.
“Just pack one bag and collect any of your savings that you can without arousing suspicion. I’m going to work extra shifts the rest of the week, so I don’t know if we’ll see each other again until Saturday. We’ll leave in the middle of the night.”
I turned my body so that I could look at him. He was so confident and he’d come up with a plan like he promised. I truly loved him and I knew that as long as he was around, my life would be good. We spent the rest of the afternoon together lying on his bed looking at maps and plotting our routes. We wanted to stay off the beaten path, so to speak, until I was eighteen and my parents had no claim over me anymore. That would only be for the first twenty-four hours of our escape, and by then we planned to be in Kansas.
We were heading to the Maryland coast where Brendan had made a contact at a college research laboratory and had gotten himself a paid internship. I was happy to see that he found something that he would enjoy. Although he made decent money bartending, he loved biology and could finally put his college degree to good use. The town was a popular summer destination, so he didn’t think it’d be too hard for me to pick up a waitressing or hostess position. He showed me all of the private coastal parks where we could swim freely and with very little notice. By the time my stomach reminded me that it was close to dinner, I was having a hard time believing I could get through the next few days. We were really going to do this, and I wanted to begin our life together now.
Before I got out of the car, Brendan reminded me to act more somber and belligerent. After all, I didn’t want to tip the parents to our impending plan. I punched him for the belligerent comment and then tried to wipe the smile off of my face as he drove away. Just a few more days and we could be together forever.
Although excited, it really didn’t take much for me to realize what this would mean for Kain. That thought brought me back into a guilt-ridden, depressed teenager. A perfect cover.
I walked into my house and prepared to play the role for a few more days. Trying to push my feelings about Kain’s friendship aside, I vowed to be there for him during his appointment ceremony, and if I could find a way to warn him about the wedding I would.
It was the least I could do.
