Seeker (Shadows)

by Jolene Perry

A knock at our door jerks me to sitting.

  “We’re sitting down for breakfast. You two wanna come up?” I recognize Micah’s voice.

  “Uh… Yeah. Sure,” Ocean answers as he slowly moves to sitting.

  “Thanks,” I say.

  “Please don’t break the trust,” Micah calls through the door. And our lock clicks, and then I hear her step back up into the main area of the boat.

  I slide off the bed and reach for the door. But maybe this is too easy. Maybe they’re going to hurt us, or…

  “Kara?” Ocean lightly takes my hand, sending my heart into a crazy rhythm.

  I turn to face him.

  “Everything’s going to be okay.”

  “You don’t know that.” I shake my head. “My whole life I’ve been taught to act and react like nothing will be okay. That’s how to stay on top. How to stay safe. How to get the job done.”

  Sadness lines his mouth and the edges of his eyes. “I hope I can change your mind.”

  “Not likely.” I pull open the door and tense up, waiting for what they might have in store for us today.

  “There you two are.” Landon gives me a small smile as I reach the top of the few steps.

  I’m not sure what to say or do right now, and I end up standing and staring at this ridiculous attempt at normal. They’re all on the bench seat around the indoor table, but Dean’s protectively holding Addison and she’s looking at me like she wishes I’d melt into the floor. Landon still won’t even glance at Ocean, and Micah’s rubbing his shoulder. She looks at us, but not really. Not at my eyes, just our direction.

  There’s so much tension in the room it’s hard to move.

  The wind and rain pounds onto the windows and I can barely see the shore, even though I know the beach is close on all sides.

  “Thank you,” Ocean says. “For letting us come up.”

  “Like you said.” Landon stares at a chart on the table. “We have things to discuss.”

  Ten minutes in, and all we’ve covered is that I don’t trust the shadows and Landon does, and that Ocean just stumbled onto the doorstep of The Middle Men last month. They already know about where our talents came from, but we still have very different ideas about what the shadows are. I don’t get a chance to defend The Middle Men because no one attacks them. All we can talk about is shadows.

  “There isn’t a wrong or right side here,” Ocean’s trying to explain over his bowl of Rice Krispies.

  Addison’s whole face goes red. “Really? Then why is my dad being held?”

  Ocean glances toward me, I’m sure wanting me to field this one.

  “Anything that could jeopardize the shadows gaining freedom is dangerous,” I say wondering why they don’t get this yet. “He’s being treated well. We’re not some evil empire, we just work on the down-low.”

  “So.” Addison folds her arms. “The shadows are to blame for my dad being held?”

  I need to focus on the shadows, and why they’re to blame. “The shadows will try to tell you whatever they can to convince you to help them, but all you will do is release them into the world. They’re a bitter, angry and calculating group of…whatever they are now. They are no longer people and haven’t been for a long time. It’s not safe.”

  “But they don’t have bodies to come back to,” Landon presses.

  He’s been half-convinced already, I can tell. I was right when we were back in Nassau—we should have taken them all by force when we had the chance. It’ll be trickier on the boat, but they’ve let us out already with no restraints, so I’ll just have to time it right and hope backup gets here fast once I call for them.

  “Exactly right,” I say. “No restraints of human bodies, but they’ll have the powers we all know exist, and a lot of hatred built up over the years. They are not harmless.” I almost stand up to show them the massive scar on my leg, but don’t. We have more time to convince them now because the storm has us stopped.

  Ocean squeezes my hand under the table, stopping my heart for a second, but I know he’s trying to help, not keep me from talking.

  They’re all glancing between each other.

  “What do you see?” I ask Micah.

  She shakes her head.

  “Really?” I hold up my wrists. “I’m telling you everything. This is from you.”

  “And this is from you.” Landon points at his nose with a smirk, which is a little purplish on one side.

  “And this.” Addison points to her cheek, which has a few scratches from the street.

  “And this.” Dean stands up and starts to unbutton his pants, making me cringe and throwing the group into a round of laughter. I wonder if I’m as strange of a straight-laced phenomenon here as I am at home.

  I keep waiting for something big to happen between Landon and Ocean, but no one’s brought it up since yesterday. It’s weird because I’m their prisoner, technically, but it’s not like Ocean and I could go anywhere, and our best chances of keeping them from letting the shadows loose is to stay here.

  “You’re doing good,” Ocean whispers in my ear.

  And instead of it being condescending like I might have taken it a day or two ago, I let the compliment sit.

  “So.” Addison points between us with her spoon. “Are you two…?”

  “No,” I sputter.

  “Riiight.” Landon chuckles as he shakes his head. “Don’t need Micah’s gift for that one.”

  Ocean glances at Landon again who holds his gaze just for a moment, before his smile leaves and he drops his head to face the table again.

  I’m just trying not to be embarrassed. The last thing I need right now is a…boyfriend. Ridiculous.

  “I need this storm to clear up. I might go crazy.” Landon blows out and Micah’s lips pull into a thin line of worry.

  Right. Landon just realized he has a brother. He might have a few questions for his parents, which can’t be answered yet.

  Wait. Now I’m wondering why Senator Michaels isn’t down here somewhere. How did that never come up?

  “Your watch. You left on the tape.” Landon points to my wrist.

  “Trust,” Ocean says with a little too much intent, and Landon nods.

  “So. Kara. You’re convinced that if we try to help the shadows, they’ll come to earth and reign some kind of terror on mankind, is that right?” Landon asks with a tone that’s almost, but not quite mocking. Maybe he’s just trying to hold that in.

  “No.” I shake my head. “Probably just those of us with gifts. Maybe everyone. I got burned by one once. I can’t imagine what it would feel like if they actually got loose.” I shudder at the memory and am also surprised I let it get out. The smell of my own skin burning still makes my stomach seize up.

  “Where?” Micah sits forward a little.

  Everyone’s eyes are on me, and I’m not sure I want to be the weirdo who won’t show. I’m the one who brought it up, of course they’d want to see.

  I stand and pull up my dress and then my spandex to show the massive scarring from mid-thigh almost to my hip. My skin is warped and looks a bit like melted candle wax with welted red lines. The memory of being burned is sharp, but the details are too fuzzy to hold on to.

  “Wow.” Dean nods in appreciation. “That’s insane.”

  “So they are dangerous.” Addison scoots closer to Dean again sliding her arm more tightly through his.

  “But I’ve been there.” Landon shakes his head. “It doesn’t make sense.” His eyes flash to mine. “Are you sure it was one of them?”

  I snort before getting my reaction under control. “Positive. I was ten and on assignment with my parents. Shadows often swarm when we’re too close to each other, or when we close in on a subject.” Or when we’re trying to stop a group from setting them free…

  “Wait.” Addison’s eyes are hard on me now. “What do you mean a subject? All you do is track people down?”

  I widen my eyes at her and lean forward, every nerve on edge because of what she so o
bviously thinks of me without ever having been to The Middle Men or seeing all that we do or how we work. Addison doesn’t scare me. No one here scares me. Not like the shadows do.

  “Yes. I’m a Seeker. You know a lot of people look forward to their ages and talents developing to the point that they can be used for assignments. A lot of people were fighting for the job I’m doing right now. But most people who work for The Middle Men do other jobs, too.” And I clamp my mouth shut because I’m not ready to talk about what we do for businessmen and world leaders. And definitely not whatever Mom has going on—only somewhat separate from the rest of the organization. At least not until we have the group in custody or have them on my side.

  “So.” Landon raises his arms and his rests his eyes hard on Ocean. “How do you like your new assignment?”

  Ocean holds both hands in the air in a surrendering gesture. “My mom kept me pretty sheltered. I’ve never been around people who have these…abilities. I’m just glad to have company.”

  Micah’s nodding, sympathy stretched across her face. “Me, too. Well, my mom didn’t keep me sheltered because she didn’t know what I could do, but I felt alone for a long time.” She almost chokes on her words and I wonder if being around people is as awkward for her as it is for me.

  Stop, Kara. They’re subjects. People to be studied and brought in and probably stopped if they continue on the course of action they’ve been working toward.

  Landon’s staring out the window again.

  “I’m going back in.” He stands up.

  Micah leaps to her feet. “Landon. No.”

  “I’m just…” He pauses. “I felt so strongly they needed our help when I was there, but after the scar and our conversation...” His brow furrows up the way Ocean’s does when he’s thinking hard. So much alike that I can’t believe I didn’t see it right away.

  “But what if we can’t trust them,” Micah pleads. “And if you start asking questions they’ll hurt you.”

  “Not going to happen.” He shakes his head.

  “I don’t know…” Dean says.

  Both Ocean and I sit silent, waiting to see how this will play out, but Micah seems more desperate every second.

  “Dammit Landon! Don’t be so careless.” Micah shoves him. “I love you. You do not get to throw yourself back into their world. I get to have some say.”

  Landon’s head tilts to the side as he watches Micah breathing. The rest of us sit silent, and I suddenly feel like I’m intruding on something between them.

  “You want some say?” He smiles. “Marry me.”

  Micah gasps, and I wonder if I want to tie Landon up to keep him from crossing over to the shadows or disappear back into my room.

  SEVENTEEN

  Micah

  All the air leaves my body before I get a hold of myself again. “You’re being ridiculous. This is not a time to be ridiculous.”

  “I love you.” He takes my hands in his making it all feel way too real. “That’s not going to change. What are you afraid of?”

  “Of losing you.” I’m weak from feeling so much. With the arrival of the new people and how mixed up Landon’s felt…

  “Marry me.” His voice is calm but persistent. And I keep waiting for a smirk or a tease or something to tell me that I can just blow him off with a joke, but it doesn’t come.

  “I… Landon we’re barely out of high school.”

  “I didn’t say it had to happen tomorrow. I just want to know that it’ll happen.” He pulls my hand until I’m forced to step closer, and then a hand rests on my waist.

  I turn away. “No more games, Landon.” Even though I know he’s not playing games at all.

  “I love you. I promise I’ll come back. And sometime after I do...” He gestures loosely in front of himself. “You and I are going to get married. And I wouldn’t miss that for anything. I’ll be back.”

  “You’re impossible.” But a part of me is leaping and thrilled that it would even cross his mind to attach himself to my brand of crazy.

  His lips meet mine in a soft kiss, and then a harder one before he pulls away smiling.

  “I’ll be right back,” he says.

  I don’t get a chance to think about what he’s doing before he’s out the door into the storm and running toward the mast where he snuck in last time.

  Now? He’s going now?

  “We have time!” I yell as I rush outside into the pelting rain. “We’ll be stuck here for days.”

  He turns sideways as I hold my breath, knowing I can’t keep him here.

  Kara runs past me and leaps toward him just as he steps through and disappears, collapsing her into a heap on the deck.

  My heart sinks like it did the first time, especially with all the new knowledge we have of the shadows and what a trip there might mean. What trying to help them might mean. The scars on Kara’s leg are horrifying.

  “Dammit!” Kara screams while crumpled on the deck of the boat, and the rain hurts it’s coming down so hard. Ocean starts to pick her up, but she shoves him away and stalks past me to the back deck. Ocean walks around where Dean and Addison are standing, open-mouthed at where Landon just disappeared. They’ve seen it before, but it’s still shocking, and I can’t believe he left after what we’ve learned.

  Kara’s left bloody marks on the boat, probably cut open her knees and hands on the deck grips. The red runs in small rivers as the rain washes it away.

  I step down the stairs onto the back deck feeling almost numb because he didn’t give me a chance to say goodbye and she’s sobbing. The man she loves isn’t the one who disappeared. She doesn’t get to sob like this.

  “Why did you let him go? He’s going to die! We’re all going to die, or something worse! Something more horrible!” she screams.

  “Shut her up,” I yell, not needing anything to make me fall apart, because one wrong word and I might.

  “We can’t be arguing like this!” Dean says.

  Kara’s still sobbing and screaming as Ocean keeps pulling on her because now she’s trying to move toward me, and he’s holding her back.

  “Take her back downstairs!” I yell to Ocean.

  “I’d rather drown in this mess than be here for whatever happens when Landon returns! If he returns.”

  Ocean’s holding her wrists now, and whispering in her ear—though, it doesn’t seem to be doing any good. There’s such venom in her voice that my chest aches with it, but I reach out to touch her anyway, needing to know what’s in her future.

  Desperation. The candlelight. Screaming and pleading to change minds. I search the picture I’m getting from her for Landon but don’t see him.

  Does that mean he won’t be there? Why do we go forward? My chest aches so hard it feels as if it’ll swallow me whole.

  “Don’t touch me!” Kara shrieks.

  She starts thrashing again, and a few kicks almost get me, when Dean steps forward and grabs her legs, balancing her between him and Ocean.

  “Now who’s in the right?” she yells as her body writhes trying to break free. “You’re holding me here against my will! Is that what you want? If anyone’s the bad guys here it’s you!”

  “I got her!” Ocean’s voice booms through the boat. “Just back off!”

  Dean drops her legs and steps back, and we all stand a little stunned at his forcefulness. I’m second-guessing Landon’s decision to let them out of the room at all.

  His voice even subdues Kara, but only slightly. She’s still hiccupping and shaking and her very real fear makes mine almost crippling. Despite the summer storm temperatures still being sweltering, I’m shivering and soaked. “I’m taking a shower,“ I say. “Bang on my door if anyone sees Landon.”

  “You might not see him. You could have just lost him forever.”

  Before thinking I rush for her and slap her across the face, burning my hand and sending fury through her eyes. “You and I are done right now. I’m probably the person closest to being on your side except for Ocean.
Don’t screw with me.”

  But I’m only maybe on her side because of the desperation I feel from her sometime in our future, but I won’t say that. Not to her. Not out loud. I turn and take the steps down to the side of the boat that Landon and I share. Share. Landon and I. Because he will come back.

  I’m so stupid. Landon wants to marry me. So foreign and weird and adult. Instead of taking the showed I wanted, I step around Dean and Addison to the back deck and hope Landon comes back. Why couldn’t I have just said yes while I had the chance?

  EIGHTEEN

  Kara

  Dean and Addison back off as Ocean half carries me downstairs, but I hear the door lock click as soon as we’re in our room. So much for trust.

  “Can you breathe?” Ocean asks.

  My whole body goes limp, and I begin to wonder if I have any fight left. “I’m failing so badly. How can it all be going so horribly? They’re moving forward as if I’ve said nothing in warning. Are they that stubborn? Stupid? Am I just really bad at a job I used to think I was good at?”

  Ocean pulls me into him and wraps his arms around me, putting my brain in that fuzzy, swirly place that I’m starting to love. Maybe not thinking is the answer for me right now.

  “We’re all learning together,” he whispers. “We’ll figure this out.”

  “I’ve already learned, Ocean.”

  “I know.” His hands rub up and down my back. “Let’s hope Landon makes it back safe and then we can sit down and talk again.

  “When you kissed me on the sidewalk, that was my first kiss.” I’m not sure where the words come from or why they’ve come out now, but they’re hanging between us making me feel stupid for admitting and even more stupid for bringing it up.

  Ocean stops but doesn’t move away.

  His body tenses and I’m just about to pull away, when he tightens his arms around me.

  “I’m sorry. It should have been better. Different. I just…”

  I squeeze my eyes tight even though I’m too close to look at him anyway. “You said.”

  “Yes. I said I couldn’t remember ever wanting to kiss a girl more, and I meant it.”