“Elaina?”
“Hmm?”
“I want to thank you for this.” She smiled as my hand circled. “I’m so happy right now. The happiest I’ve ever been in my entire life.”
“Aww, Henry… You’re going to make me cry. It’s not nice to make a pregnant woman cry. I’m overjoyed to see you this way. You deserve a lot of happiness. I hope we can give that to you.”
“You already have. It’s all coming together. We married, found my mum, got rid of that asshole, knocked you up… I’m so excited to meet our baby.”
“Not too much longer. Well, it feels like an eternity for me, knowing I’m going to get bigger. I don’t think my boobs could get any bigger. I mean, really. Look at these things!”
I wiggled my brows. “I know. I like them…a lot.” I ran my hand over her very plump breast.
“When the baby comes, they’re off limits.”
“I know.” I sighed. “Got to get all my booby loving in now before our little miracle makes an appearance, I suppose.”
Elaina laughed and smacked my chest. We lay for a few minutes, enjoying each other’s company, when worry suddenly swept over me. I have no idea why it was always so difficult for me to enjoy my good times and not allow everything else in my head to ruin them.
I worried for our child. How would I behave around him or her? What good would come to our baby with me as his or her father? I was a bloody fucking wreck. It truly was the happiest time in my life, but there was always the fear of my depraved mind taking over, sucking the life and joy right out of me and everyone surrounding me.
“Elaina, can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
“Do you think I’m going to end up like him?”
“Like whom?”
“Him. Roger. My father,” I mumbled.
“Oh, Henry. No! Absolutely not. He was a tyrant.”
How did she not see the similarities? “I kind of rule everything with an iron fist myself. And I have quite a temper.”
“Yes, you do, but your ‘iron fist,’ as you say, is for the good of the group and for us. Whereas his tyrannical behavior came from his own wants and selfishness. I’m not going to lie. You do exhibit some frightening behaviors. However, you weren’t raised properly, never being shown how to suppress those emotions or find a different way to get your anger out. Which is why I try to shove you into the gym every time I see you losing control.”
“I’m afraid I’ll be cruel to my child like he was to me.”
She pushed herself up and grabbed my face. “Henry Daniels, you listen to me and you listen to me carefully. You are you, not him. You already love this baby dearly. He never loved you. You may get a little loud and mental sometimes, but I know you will be the most amazing father to ever walk this earth. You’re kind and gentle, not some ego-crazed maniac who has a God complex.”
“There were so many things, Elaina. So many things he did to me that I fear I could do myself. Terrible things… Do you really think I’ll be a good father, even with all my issues?”
“Of course I do! Would I say it if I didn’t?”
“Probably not.”
Elaina kissed me. “Our child is privileged to have a man like you as his or her father.”
“Thank you. I can’t even begin to tell you how much it means to me to hear you say that because my demons tell me otherwise.”
“Well, they’re wrong, so don’t listen to them. I know you will be amazing.”
“They say such cruel things…”
“You are so much more than what they say to you.” She lay back down and snuggled into me the best she could. “I love you, Henry Daniels, and so does Baby Daniels,” she murmured.
“I love you, Elaina Daniels.” My cool touch made goosebumps rise all over her body as my hand circled her belly again. “And I love you, Baby Daniels.”
We rested for a little while longer before deciding to dress and go for a short walk.
As Elaina and I left our room, Gunther was marching Chris down the hall with one hand gripped around his neck, the other shoving him along. Josie and Cora were running down the hall back toward Josie’s room.
“What the fuck is going on now?!” I growled.
“Chris attacked Jake,” Josie yelled as she ran past.
“What?!” I pointed at Elaina. “You, stay put.”
I ran in the door right behind them. On the floor, in a small pool of his own blood, was Jake, out like a light.
“Shit,” Cora bit out. “Help me get him to the clinic.”
Moving as fast as we could, I grabbed his upper body and Cora grabbed his lower, Josie walking behind us.
“Keep him on his side so he doesn’t choke on the blood,” Cora commanded.
After getting Jake situated on the cot in the clinic, I rolled him on his side. Blood spilled from his relaxed jaw. Cora checked his pulse and breathing, then grabbed a bottle of water and a cloth to wipe down his face.
A few seconds later, Jake woke with a start.
“Jake!” Josie yelled.
“I’m sorry.” A stream of blood ran from his lips.
“Your nose is definitely broken, and your eyes are already swelling shut. Let’s get you sitting up and see if there is anything else going on.”
Josie and I helped get Jake to a slouching position. His eyes rolled as he listed to the left.
“You all right, mate? Stay with us.” I glared at Josie. “What the fuck happened?”
“It’s a long story and I rather not get into it. It’s something from Jake and Chris’ past.”
“If it’s something that affects the group, I need to know.”
“It’s a personal issue. If he allows me when he’s fully conscious, I’ll tell you.”
“All right. I can accept that,” I muttered.
Cloth in hand, mopping up the blood as she went, Cora examined Jake by pulling back his cheeks and turning his head all around, looking for any other signs of injuries. She lifted his shirt and we stared at his garish scarring for a moment.
“Okay. Looks like he lost a tooth down on the bottom on the left side, a little laceration to his tongue, a broken nose… Some bruising to his torso and, judging by his lethargy, I would say it’s likely he has a concussion,” she said, packing his nose with rolled up gauze.
“Christ. Never a peaceful moment here, is there?” I muttered.
Josie spun to me. “Like you have fucking room to talk!”
I pointed at her. “Watch yourself, little bird!”
“Screw you!” she spat back at me.
“Both of you, cut it out!” Cora yelled. “Jake, are you with me? We need to rinse your mouth out.” Jake moaned and nodded. “Josie, go get the salt from the pantry.”
Josie stood in front of me with her hands on her hips, giving me a glare that could melt ice, while I hunted in my pockets for the pantry key.
Josie bolted into the cafeteria only to run right into Gunther and Chris. “You are a fucking asshole!” she roared.
“It should’ve been him! After what he did to her, it should’ve been him!” Chris screamed as he flailed around in Gunther’s grip.
“Don’t you think he feels the same way? Do you not understand that? He feels like he’s alive only to be punished for what happened. He can’t even look at himself without being reminded of it.”
“I don’t give a shit! That’s how it should be! Karma!”
“Yes, you do, Chris. Don’t say that!”
“You’re wrong, my friend,” he growled, jamming his finger in Josie’s face.
“I’m not your fucking friend. Not after what you did to him.”
“He deserved it! What he did is unforgivable in my eyes! He hurt her… He hurt her,” he repeated as he fell into the wall.
“Jake understands what he did and hates himself for it, but he didn’t take advantage of her. That’s not who he is! He needs your forgiveness or he’ll never be able to move on.” Josie stormed off to the pantry and grabbed t
he box of salt. She stomped past Chris again, cussing him out as she ran back to the clinic.
“Fuck.” Chris dragged his hand across his face, trying to hide his tears.
“Let’s get you back to your room, so you can do what you need to do in private,” Gunther said, grabbing him by the elbow, escorting him down the hall.
When Josie dashed back into the clinic, Cora and I muscled Jake over to the sink. With his face swollen and eyelids slowly opening and closing, he wavered on his feet. She mixed him up a cup of salt water. After he spat out several bloody mouthfuls, the fluids ran clear.
“Okay, Jake. Let’s get you sitting.” Cora guided him to the chair. “Hold this, just in case your mouth starts bleeding again.” Jake groaned when he lifted his hand to take the already bloodied cloth.
Josie knelt next to him. “Are you okay?” she asked in a soft tone.
“Yeah. ’Ventually,” he mumbled through bloody lips.
“Why didn’t you fight back?”
“I deserved it.”
She shook her head and laid her forehead on his knee. “You didn’t deserve it. You made a mistake. Both of you made a mistake. Both of you, Jake. Do you hear me?”
“Not to your bes’ friend’s…former bes’ friend’s sis’er. Now, I’ve ’ficially los’ everyone, but you. You’re all I’ve got left.” He choked back a sob.
Their conversation left me quite curious, but I was going to respect Jake and his privacy…for now.
“Oh, Jake…” Josie took his hand into hers and caressed the top with her thumb. It was a moment that told me Josie has some serious feelings for Jake.
I ran my hand over my hair. “Josie, can he stay with you until his head clears up? Afterward, I can set him up in a room of his own, if need be. Obviously, he can’t stay with Chris and probably shouldn’t be on his own right now.”
“He can stay with me. It’s fine. I’ll take care of him.”
“All right… Good.” I ran my hands over my hair again. “Gunther and I will get your stuff, Jake.”
I left the clinic. “Fuck me!” I shouted as I stalked through the halls to find Gunther.
Once Josie and Jake left, Cora cleaned up the mess and threw away the stained sheets. With a sigh, she leaned against the counter. The little chat with Gunther did nothing for her emotions, except leave her disparaged. She felt the display of strong feelings for him was plainly obvious. He missed the fact she had fallen in love with him, thinking he understood that from the moment they began kissing. What a messy way to start and end a relationship.
Already a wreck, she headed to the closet to get an element that would definitely be an answer to her suspicions, rather than just a gut feeling she had. She sifted through the contents until they came into view.
Exhaling, she grabbed the pregnancy test. Walking into the bathroom, she felt the emotions tear through her. Cora began to cry as she urinated on the stick, already knowing what the results would be.
Chapter 17
Stunned by Gunther’s aggression, Mara watched the entire scene from a chair in the cafeteria, reminding her of when he killed her father. The moment Chris worked to hide his emotions poked at her thoughts. Such a strong, happy-go-lucky man dissolving into an emotional mess tugged at her entire being.
When Gunther shoved him out of the cafeteria, she got up and followed quietly, diving around corners. Once Gunther and Chris were in his room, she ran into the lab next door and listened through the adjoining wall.
Gunther opened the door to Chris’ room, shoving him in. “Whatever you do, don’t lay another hand on anyone here again. Am I clear?”
“Yeah.” Chris wiped his face.
“You going to be all right?”
“Yeah.”
Gunther left, not wanting to get involved in anyone else’s drama. He had seemingly caused enough of his own. He wanted to get back to Cora and hash it all out.
After Chris was finally alone, he broke down, beyond furious. A light rap on his door made him snarl. “What?!”
Henry poked his head in. “I need to grab Jake’s stuff.”
“It’s all over there.” Chris waved his hand to the right side of the room.
Gunther came back in and they quickly packed everything up and walked out of the room without a word exchanged. Seconds later, another knock made Chris growl. He stalked to the door and pushed it open, Mara stood in the hall.
“Hey,” she said, biting her bottom lip.
“What?”
“I saw the commotion in the cafeteria and wondered if, well…if you needed to talk.”
“What the fuck do you care?”
“I know I come across as the queen of cold-hearted bitches, but I do have a softer side. It’s obvious you need to talk.” He stared at her for several moments before he stepped aside and allowed her in. She glanced around the room. “So this is the bachelor pad?”
“And bachelorette,” he mumbled.
“Oh, right. Farren and Eden stay here, as well.” She walked to the beds, looking at their belongings.
Chris settled at one of the lab tables they had pushed to the back of the room. Staring off into space, he replied, “Yeah, they spend most of their time with James and Savannah. The girls sleep in here so those two can have their privacy.”
“Right.” Mara sat on the stool next to him. “So… I kind of feel like I’m pulling teeth here. What happened?”
“I kicked Jake’s ass.” He looked down at his right hand, realizing he had a couple cuts on his knuckles.
She looked toward the sink and saw bottles of water and a stack of washcloths. Mara got up, wet a cloth and sat again, taking his hand. “This looks like it hurts,” she murmured, wiping off the blood.
“Yeah…a little.”
“Bruising and swelling have already started. I wonder if you broke something.” Mara moved all of his fingers, testing them, then lifted his hand up and kissed one of his knuckles. “There. Magically cured,” she murmured.
Chris smirked. “Thanks.”
“So what brought on the fight?”
“Just something from our past… Something I didn’t know all the details about until now.”
“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry about my comments earlier.”
“Whatever…”
“How about a hug?”
He shrugged. “Sure.”
Mara scooted closer and wrapped her arms around Chris’ neck. He relaxed into her, feeling the warmth. Resting his forehead on her shoulder, the emotions were hard to suppress. He drew in a few shaky, deep breaths in a lame attempt to soothe his nerves.
“It’s okay. You can let it out.” Chris pulled back, dropped his elbows on the table and rested his head in his hands. Mara’s hand circled his back, slow and easy. “Are you two no longer friends?”
“That motherfucker is dead to me.”
“Is that why you’re so upset?”
“No.”
“Okay, well, since you don’t feel like talking…” Mara stood, but Chris grabbed her arm.
“Don’t go. I’m sorry. It’s just a difficult situation for me.” She sat on the stool and gazed into his eyes. He shook his head. “Because of him, my baby sister died. I just found out the fucker knocked her up. They got into a car wreck on the way home from getting a test.” Desperately trying to keep the tears in his eyes, one trickled from each. “The car exploded into flames after it careened off a hill. She burned to death. There was nothing but charred remains. The wake was surreal. I stood in front with my parents, watching so many fall to their knees, praying for my baby sister’s ascent. There were so many people there from school and the community, they had to run the viewing hours together. When it was winding down, I finally decided to go have a chat with her.” Chris choked out a couple sobs, leaving Mara to wipe his face.
“I knelt and rested my head against the coffin. It was pink—her favorite color. Mom was adamant she get what she liked. I told her I was sorry for all the mean things I did to her, and how
much I loved her. I told her not to be angry with Jake. That he almost died, too. Then I sobbed in front of everyone. A crowd gathered around me, holding me, trying to calm me, but I was inconsolable. They had to carry me away from her coffin because I didn’t want to let her go. At her funeral the next day, I sat there in disbelief… She was really gone.”
Mara wiped away her own tears. “I’m so sorry.”
“He robbed her of her innocence. He robbed her from us. He should have died that day, not her…” Chris broke down. “Not her…,” he whispered through his tears.
The tremor in his body told Mara he needed more comfort. She stood, took his hand, and led him to his bed. “Lay down with me. I’ll hold you.”
Mara curled up next to Chris, wrapping her body around his. Gazing into one another’s eyes, fatigue settled and his lids fluttered shut. Mara ran her hand through his tousled hair. His innocent, charming, All-American boy look tugged at her heart.
“I’m sorry, Chris,” she whispered, moving closer and placing a soft kiss on his lips. He moaned and squeezed her body closer. She smiled and relaxed into him, wanting to be there when he woke.
Gunther dropped off Jake’s belongings, then headed back to his room. He wanted to explain his feelings to Cora, but he was unsure of how to say everything. He worried he would ramble on too much and make no sense, furthering the disgust she felt for him. He opened the door, seeing her curled up in a ball on the couch. The pressure in his chest built knowing he broke her spirit.
“Cora…”
“Don’t.” She wiped her tears with her wrist. He walked and knelt in front of her, knees cracking. Reaching out to her face, she slapped his hand away. “Leave me be and don’t ever touch me again.”
“Can we talk more?”
“Do I look like I feel like talking right now?”
“No… No, you don’t. I guess I’ll go to the gym.”
“Good. Get out of my face.”
Gunther quickly changed into his gym shorts. Just as he was about to open the door, she said, “You’re going to be a father again.”
Hand on the door handle, he stopped breathing and closed his eyes. There was no way he could face her. Hanging his head, he jammed his fingers into his eyes. “Right… Okay,” he murmured. He opened the door and stepped out, closing it softly, as if he would wake the dead.
Blind Faith (Shattered Lives, Book Four) Page 15
