Barking Up the Wrong Tree
Page 1
PRAISE FOR THE BLUFF POINT ROMANCES
“With a down-to-earth heroine, charming hero, and adorable puppy, About a Dog is romantic and entertaining. Jenn McKinlay writes sexy, funny romances that will leave you begging for more!”
—Jill Shalvis, New York Times bestselling author
“Funny, charming, and heart-stoppingly romantic. With an irresistible hero and an utterly enchanting heroine, not to mention a dog you can’t help but fall in love with, About a Dog is the perfect mix of sweep-you-off-your-feet romance and humor. Jenn McKinlay is a rising star.”
—Jaci Burton, New York Times bestselling author
“McKinlay delivers heartwarming humor at its finest.”
—Lori Wilde, New York Times bestselling author
“Clever writing, laugh-out-loud humor, and a sizzling romance. Mackenzie and Gavin’s reunion story will keep you turning the pages and laughing until your sides hurt. This one is a keeper.”
—Delores Fossen, USA Today bestselling author
“About a Dog has friends, family, romance . . . and of course a dog! It’s funny and sexy! I loved it!”
—Holly Jacobs, national bestselling author
“I loved About a Dog! Mac and her friends are funny and real. The romance is charming, as is the town of Bluff Point, Maine, with its quirky residents, both human and animal. Tulip is the cutest matchmaker and best scene-stealer ever!”
—Nancy Warren, USA Today bestselling author
PRAISE FOR THE NOVELS OF JENN McKINLAY
“Full of warm and likable characters.”
—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
“Full of fun and plot twists.”
—Booklist
“What a great read!”
—Library Journal
“Jenn McKinlay expertly weaves entertaining characters and circumstances into the plot.”
—Fresh Fiction
Berkley Sensation titles by Jenn McKinlay
Bluff Point Romances
ABOUT A DOG
BARKING UP THE WRONG TREE
Berkley Prime Crime titles by Jenn McKinlay
Library Lover’s Mysteries
BOOKS CAN BE DECEIVING
DUE OR DIE
BOOK, LINE, AND SINKER
READ IT AND WEEP
ON BORROWED TIME
A LIKELY STORY
BETTER LATE THAN NEVER
Cupcake Bakery Mysteries
SPRINKLE WITH MURDER
BUTTERCREAM BUMP OFF
DEATH BY THE DOZEN
RED VELVET REVENGE
GOING, GOING, GANACHE
SUGAR AND ICED
DARK CHOCOLATE DEMISE
VANILLA BEANED
CARAMEL CRUSH
Hat Shop Mysteries
CLOCHE AND DAGGER
DEATH OF A MAD HATTER
AT THE DROP OF A HAT
COPY CAP MURDER
ASSAULT AND BERET
BERKLEY SENSATION
Published by Berkley
An imprint of Penguin Random House LLC
375 Hudson Street, New York, New York 10014
Copyright © 2017 by Jennifer McKinlay Orf
Excerpt from Every Dog Has His Day by Jenn McKinlay copyright © 2017 by Jennifer McKinlay Orf
Penguin Random House supports copyright. Copyright fuels creativity, encourages diverse voices, promotes free speech, and creates a vibrant culture. Thank you for buying an authorized edition of this book and for complying with copyright laws by not reproducing, scanning, or distributing any part of it in any form without permission. You are supporting writers and allowing Penguin Random House to continue to publish books for every reader.
BERKLEY and BERKLEY SENSATION are registered trademarks and the B colophon is a trademark of Penguin Random House LLC.
Ebook ISBN: 9780399584732
First Edition: October 2017
Cover photos: couple © Maria Teijero / Gettyimages.com; beach sand © Matt Gibson / Shutterstock; dog © rebeccaashworth/Shutterstock; lighthouse © chbaum/Shutterstock; sunrise © Charcomplx/Shutterstock
Cover design by Katie Anderson
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
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Contents
Praise for the novels of Jenn McKinlay
Berkley Sensation titles by Jenn McKinlay
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Excerpt from Every Dog Has His Day
About the Author
For my fabulous agent, Christina Hogrebe, who believed in this series from the start. You picked me up and brushed me off during my crisis of confidence, and you have been ever so patient with my complete lack of understanding about the business side of this writing gig. I could not do what I do without you, and I am so very grateful to have you at my side. I can’t wait to see what we do next!
Acknowledgments
Why do I love my job? Because I get to work with some of the best and brightest in the publishing industry. Thank you so very much to my editor, Kate Seaver, who is always flexible and patient with my process; editor Katherine Pelz, who keeps me on track and sweats the details for me; and copy editor Amelia Kreminski, who fixes the error of my ways. I’d also like to thank the art department and the cover artist, Katie Anderson, for making such spectacular covers for the Bluff Point series. And for the team that has had boots on the ground getting the buzz out about these books, I offer my heartfelt thanks to Jeanne-Marie Hudson, Fareeda Bullert, Erin Galloway, and Ryanne Probst. I am so very fortunate to have such an amazing squad!
As always, I have to thank my family and friends for putting up with me. This has been a particularly busy year, and I appreciate everyone’s support and understanding when I canceled dates, missed events, and generally had my head in my laptop pretty much constantly. From those who listened to me whine (Mom) to those who hugged me when I needed it (Hub and Bro) to those who brought me copious amounts of candy when required (Hooligans), I love you all so very much. Plus, you give me endless material for the books, so thanks for that, too!
Chapter 1
“I bet it’s a stash of yarn or maybe a collection of troll dolls and bingo daubers,” Carly DeCusati said.
“Really? Your elderly neighbor leaves you something in her will and that’s what you think it might be?” Jillian Braedon, Carly’s best friend for life, asked her.
More accurately, Jillian asked Carly’s curvy backside as Carly was half wedged in the narrow closet in her bedroom with her trusty handheld vacuum, attempting to suck up the dust bunnies that had set up a warren in there.
“No, not really. I have no idea what she might have left me,” Carly said. “I mean, Mrs. Genaro was my neighbor and I looked in on her and watched some television with her, but I didn’t really know her, you know? Honestly, I can’t believe she left me anything at all.”
“Maybe it’s diamonds, a priceless piece of art, or—”
“Her tea cozy collection,” Mackenzie Harris interrupted Jillian.
She was standing beside Jilly as they folded the mountain of clothes on Carly’s bed in an effort to fit them into the stack of empty moving boxes they had gathered.
“She didn’t—” Emma Jameson protested but Carly interrupted.
“Collect tea cozies? Not that I’m aware of, but I think that’s a safer bet than diamonds or art.”
“Bummer,” Jillian said.
“Agreed,” Carly said. She wiggled backwards, just enough to poke her head out from around the doorjamb, and turned to face her three childhood friends. She gave them a rueful glance and added, “That did not stop me, however, from spending a significant amount of time praying to the big guy that it would be enough cash to pay my rent so I can halt my move back to Bluff Point.”
“Is coming home to Maine really that bad?” Jillian asked. “You’ve been in Brooklyn for a long time, maybe now you’ll be happier at home like Mac.”
“Mac’s happy because she found a hot young veterinarian to warm up those frigid Maine winters,” Carly said.
Mackenzie turned a bright shade of red. Her summer romance with Gavin Tolliver had been the stuff of legends, or at least really good chick flicks.
“Please, he’s still my baby brother,” Emma said with a frown. “Can we not use the word ‘hot’ when describing him?”
“Sorry,” Carly said.
“But he is,” Mac said, giving Emma side eye. “Totally hot.”
Emma rolled her eyes but she was grinning. As the only happily married one of their group, she had the matchmaker bug going big time.
“See? You have us there, your Maine crew,” Jillian said. “Coming home won’t be so bad.”
Carly looked at Jillian in confusion. “I’m sorry. You’ve met my family, right?”
“Yes, but—”
“No buts, I love them dearly, but they suck the soul right out of me,” Carly said. “You try being the fourth sister in a brat pack of five. It’d make the sanest person cray cray.”
“I’m an only child, so I can’t really wrap my head around that. But you need to look at the bigger picture,” Jilly argued. “Your company downsized and you lost your job. You can’t pay your rent and all of your best friends are in Bluff Point, Maine. Clearly the universe is telling you it’s time to come home. Besides, don’t you want to spend more time with us?”
Jillian tipped her head to the side in a look meant to charm and disarm. Emma and Mac stepped up beside her and mimicked her pose. They were like a trifecta of pretty, exotic, and lovely. Carly sighed. There was no way she could tell her friends the truth—that while she loved each one of them dearly, when she was with them she felt as if she should be carrying a bucket and mop.
The progeny of a black mom and a white dad, Jillian was tall and lithe with brown skin that glowed, big dark eyes, full lips, and a head of enviable dark curls. If she hadn’t been Carly’s best friend since childhood, Carly would have avoided Jillian like the plague of good-looking that she was. Truly, no woman should ever have to stand next to a woman as exotically beautiful as Jillian.
Then there was Emma. Petite, blonde, blue-eyed, she looked like someone who was enchanted to life from an old Disney animated film. If that weren’t bad enough, she had a huge heart and a contagious laugh and made sure she milked every bit of awesome out of every single day. In other words, she was impossible not to love.
“If I can go home, so can you,” Mac said.
Carly frowned. Mackenzie was actually the worst of the three. Medium in height and build with thick, wavy brown hair that hung just past her shoulders and an ability to do mental math that left Carly dazzled, Mac was the sort of hot girl who had no idea she was hot, which was the absolute worst kind because Carly couldn’t even be mad at her for being hot since Mac didn’t know it herself.
Mac had a smile that lit up rooms and stopped men’s hearts. At least, it had pretty much stopped Gavin Tolliver’s heart. The man had been in love with her since he was ten years old and Mac had never caught on until just recently—yeah, because she was thick like that.
Being unfashionably short and voluptuous, with a hot temper that frequently beat out her common sense, Carly had always felt like the ugly stepsister when she was with her friends. She had never told any of them, of course, but going home and being with all of them again? Yeah, it wasn’t really rocking her self-esteem.
A belch sounded and they all looked at one another. No one asked to be excused so it was pretty clear it wasn’t one of them, which left . . .
“Tulip!” Mac cried her dog’s name. “Tulip, what have you gotten into?”
The retching noise started shortly after that.
“Oh, no! That’s her about-to-hork noise,” Mac said. She dashed from the bedroom out to the living room. “Tulip!”
“I’ll help!” Emma cried. She glanced at Carly, noting the alarmed expression on her face. “We’ll take her for a walk until it passes. We got this.”
Carly glanced at Jillian, who was obviously trying not to laugh.
“Can’t wait to see them with babies,” Carly said.
Jillian lost the battle and cracked up. When she was composed again, she looked at Carly and said, “And there’s that. You don’t want to miss any of the big life events, do you? It’ll be great being together again, I promise.”
“Hanging out with you will be a bright spot,” Carly said. “But the newly married Emma and the newly-shacked-up Mac are not going to be nearly as entertaining. Why is everyone suddenly hooking up? Don’t they know that these are the best years of our lives?”
“We’re thirty-two,” Jillian said. “I think it’s the natural order that we start pairing off and settling down.”
Carly fell backwards out of the closet. “Are you trying to tell me something? Oh, no, are you and Sam Kennedy a thing now?”
“What? No!” Jilly protested. “He was just my partner for Emma’s wedding. We’ve become friends—good friends—that’s it.”
Carly narrowed one eye at her as if trying to determine whether Jillian was telling her the truth.
“I swear.” Jillian raised her right hand, forgetting that she was holding a pair of Carly’s pink underpants.
“Does holding a thong make it more binding?” Carly asked with a laugh. Jillian dropped the panties and frowned at her. “All right, but if I find out there’s been any hanky-panky and you didn’t tell me . . .”
The buzzer on Carly’s intercom interrupted her. She glanced at the clock.
“Oh, that’ll be Mrs. G’s lawyer,” she said. “He’s disgustingly punctual.”
Jillian helped her to her feet. Carly stripped off her cleaning gloves and adjusted the red bandana she had used to tie up her long dark curls. With her capri pants and plaid flannel shirt tied at the waist, she felt very much like a nineteen-fifties haus frau.
“Come on, I’d better let the little badger in before he starts buzzing every door in the building,” she said.
“You might try being polite to him, maybe he’s going to be your savior,” Jillian said.
“No way, he’s a lawyer, whi
ch in my experience means that this is going to cost me, probably in a pound of flesh,” she said. She paused and glanced at her reflection in the full-length mirror, critically studying the generous tits and ass she’d inherited from Nana DeCusati. “Then again, that might not be a bad thing.”
“Quit it,” Jillian said. She pushed Carly toward the front of the apartment. “You know men drool like fools at the sight of the girls. Those boobies are like your superpower, able to knock grown men to their knees with a single glance of cleavage.”
“And that, my dear, is why you are my best friend,” Carly said.
She stood by her front door and hit the answer button on her intercom.
“Who is it?” she sang.
“Bartholomew Schuster.” The voice sounded high with a little nasal whine to it that reminded Carly of a mosquito.
“Come on up, Barry,” she answered. “Door is open.”
She buzzed him in and then unlocked the door to her apartment, leaving it ajar before she joined Jillian where she sat on a stool by the kitchen counter. They heard his footsteps on the stairs to her second floor apartment moments before he arrived. He was not a delicate stepper, Carly noted.
“It’s Bartholomew, Ms. DeCusati,” he corrected her as he stepped inside the apartment. “Or you can call me Mr. Schuster if you prefer. Oh, hello.”
Barry froze in his tracks at the sight of Jillian. Carly glanced at her friend, who was smiling at Barry as if she had just happened upon a cute little garden gnome. Barry was only an inch or two taller than Carly, making him pretty short for a guy. It was a good thing Jillian was sitting down or he’d have to work with a ladder just to be eye to eye. As it was, he looked simply besotted with her.
Carly tried not to dwell on the fact that she had met Barry once before and this had not been his reaction to seeing her for the first time. Then again, as she took in the short, paunchy, prematurely gray man in front of her, she did not consider this a loss.
“Barry, this is my friend Jillian Braedon and before you ask, no, she will not go out with you,” Carly said.