Whole Lot Of Shiftin' Going On: Magic and Mayhem Universe (Baba Yaga Adventures)

by Donna McDonald

  She eased away and patted his massive chest. “You’re a sexy distraction I can’t afford at the moment, but I guess I’d feel the same way if I knew you were about to get into a fight. Hide the family, then come back.”

  Chuck smiled and nodded. She laughed when she heard Harrison demanding to know how long they’d be in the cage and Garrison telling his brother not to worry because he’d get them out if their incarceration lasted too long. Farley laughed at both his brothers and gave her a thumbs up as he followed them indoors.

  This was her new family, Hildy thought, smiling at where her thoughts had gone. She hoped the upstairs held at least three bedrooms. Her mind was on the future when she felt a magical wind lifting her hair.

  15

  Glad she was more than halfway down her sidewalk, Hildy turned to see a woman with a pig snout glaring at her. Even with the new appendage taking up most of her human face, Hildy would have recognized the witch.

  “Long time, no see, Isobelle. Too bad it wasn’t forever.”

  “Did you honestly think I was going to let you get by with this?” Isobelle demanded, pointing to her snout.

  “Nice ears too. Have you grown a piggy tail yet?” Hildy asked, crossing her arms. “Your sons haven’t grown tails, but it’s probably just a matter of time. What spell did you cast on them, Isobelle? Because it’s all coming back to you—three times three—compliments of me and Gaia.”

  “You did not send this change to me. You’re not strong enough for such magic. I may have been frozen but I heard you give up your Baba Yaga powers.”

  Hildy’s mouth twisted with the irony. “Sorry, dudette, but you got it wrong—like totally wrong. I gave my Baba Yaga power to Carol but I got a different kind of power in exchange. Oh, wait… how would you know? You didn’t give up your power, did you? As I recall, the Goddess Morgana took it from you and gave it to Carol because you were unworthy to have it.”

  “That female is not my goddess. She has no power over me,” Isobelle said. “And I lost nothing. Watch and learn about my greatness.”

  Isobelle lifted her hands and chanted. Hildy lifted a brow when at least a hundred rodents of varying sizes appeared from the road and surrounding area. Well, it wasn’t like Keera hadn’t tried to warn her and the cats.

  “That’s your big magic? I’m not impressed. Here kitty, kitty, kitty,” Hildy called.

  Isobelle laughed at her until Hildy’s familiars appeared already in attack position. They looked around in alarm and then back to their witch.

  “Youse called us?” Fat Bastard asked.

  “I need your help with them,” Hildy said, pointing at the rodent army. “Invite some friends to lunch. I’ll provide a round of catnip for everyone after.”

  “Catnip. Ooo-la-la… it’s party time. Youse got it, doll patootie,” Fat Bastard said. He looked to his buddies. “Call dem cheatin’ Sunday parlor cats from the card games too. Those losers owe us anyway. Might as well collect our earnings in help.”

  Hildy laughed at Fat Bastard’s strange seriousness, but she and Isobelle both had to cover their ears when twenty yowling cats suddenly appeared out of thin air.

  “A few cats against my rodent army? Are you kidding me?” Isobelle threw back her head and laughed hysterically.

  Hildy bit her lips when George suddeny appeared on the lawn along with three confused females. George looked at Hildy. “Did you bring us here for some particular reason, Ms. Shifter Whisperer, or was you just practicin’ your poofin’?”

  Hildy chuckled, slightly embarrassed. “My cat familiars sent out a magical distress call to other… um… cats in the nearby area,” she explained to a bewildered George. “Sorry. I guess Fat Bastard accidentally included you guys too.”

  George’s green eyes glittered as he yowled. “Well, Mr. Bastard was right about me being a cat, and I say, what the hello kitty am I waitin’ for? I’m always in the mood for a midday snack. Mice and rats were never my thing, but if it helps you out, I’m in.”

  “No, George. Don’t shift!” Hildy yelled, but it was too late.

  “Lordy. This recklessness is why we kicked him out of our lair,” one of the females said with a whine in her voice. “George is sexy and brave, but that mountain lion is dumb as a box of hair. I can’t be birthing mountain lion babies with his bad habits.”

  Hildy sighed at the trouble Isobelle was causing everyone. At least this time, George kept a mountain lion head which she saw he was using to dispatch mice in great volumes. As for the rest of him though? She couldn’t tell what the rest of George’s body was trying to become.

  The female shifters looked at the strangely George and sadly shook their heads.

  Hildy cringed at the battle happening in front of her. Her brave and somewhat pathetic cat posse had managed to push the rodents into the nearby woods. But many of the cats, including her familiars, were now limping from rodent bites. Blood covered nearly every inch of what once was her pristine front yard.

  “Some big deal shifter healer you are,” Isobelle said with a laugh, waving a hand to George who disappeared into the woods. “What was wrong with the mountain lion? He looked pretty ridiculous to me.”

  Hildy turned to glare at Isobelle. “George looks no more ridiculous than you do. With Gaia’s help, I managed to turn you—a non-shifter—into the same creature you spelled your children and their father to become. So what else you got, witch? Or are you ready to call back your wicked spell?”

  Isobelle lifted her hands to the air. The skies darkened and the wind lifted her hair. Isobelle called out for power in strange words a human tongue could barely form.

  Hildy watched the cowardly mountain lion females run behind her house. At least now she had less to worry about.

  She braced her feet apart and spread her arms out to each side of her body.

  She did not fear anything in Gaia’s world—not wind, not storms, and not the darkness. She was part of the Earth now.

  “Bring it,” Hildy ordered. “Your plan to defeat me didn’t work last time. It won’t work this time either, Isobelle. Good wins over evil—always—no matter how long it takes. This is a lesson you’re going to learn even if it takes me the rest of my life to teach it to you.”

  Isobelle laughed. “How stupid are you? You’ve already lost. I’m the one your mate had children with—not you. I believe that makes me the biggest winner of all.”

  A wicked smile lifted Hildy’s lips. “No, actually, that makes you the biggest loser because my mate is a triplet. Sorry to break the bad news to you, but you seduced Charlie, one of my mate’s brothers. Chuck and I changed his virgin status just last night. But you did create an amazing set of bear cubs with Charlie. They look exactly like you right now. Don’t you want to be a piggy-mom to three adorable piggy-bear cubs? They’re adorable.”

  “They were supposed to carry the spell to others and then turn into swine themselves. I intended for them to live out their sad little lives as pigs after they helped me ruin your life and career.”

  “Too bad. So sad. Their father’s amazing bear genes fought off your evil. Good thing for you though since I tied your pig evolution to theirs. Not even your darkest power can break Gaia’s power over you now. Either you help me fix everyone, or you’re going to turn into a pig. It’s your choice.”

  Isobelle’s scream of rage shook the forest and the ground they were standing on.

  Hildy snorted. “If you mess up my recently renovated house with your tantrums, I’ll make sure the Baba Yaga locks away a demonic toad instead of a human witch.”

  “You hold no true power over me. I am mistress of my fate.”

  “Haven’t you kept up? I work for the Great Mother now and Gaia does have the power. But I don’t need to bother Gaia with this. Here’s a little something a dragon mage taught me.”

  Hildy held out her hand and magic shot like a laser out of her palm.

  “Vespertiliones prohibere!”

  The command echoed as it hit Isobelle and froze her in p
lace. The woman’s eyes turned to flames as she glared at Hildy. Last time her cats had saved the day by sending Isobelle’s magic back to her. This time it had been all Hildy’s power and she was proud of stopping the woman who’d harmed so many people she cared about.

  Unfazed by the viciousness in Isobelle’s eyes, Hildy calmly walked toward her solidified enemy. “Just like old times, isn’t it? I hope the Goddess Morgana was watching. She probably needs a good laugh.”

  “Hildy, for Goddess sake, don’t touch her. That witch has demon cooties and you know Isobelle’s dark magic still works through the freezing spell. Morgana kept me from touching her last time this happened.”

  “And Isobelle escaped last time to do this to me this time,” Hildy snorted and shoved Carol’s arm. “It’s about freaking time you showed up.”

  Carol pushed Hildy’s arm back. “Stop ranting. I was in the middle of a werewolf shifter fight and barely saved your cat’s asses from being eaten. It wasn’t like I wasn’t trying to get here.”

  “Okay. I guess the Great One gets a pass this time for making me a lower priority,” Hildy teased. She looked at frozen Isobelle and sighed. “Before I zapped her, she admitted she’d done something, but never gave any details. I’m no better off than I was before she showed up. She wouldn’t stop bragging long enough to have a real conversation.”

  “Isobelle outclasses us in the dark arts. That’s why I called an old friend. He’s well-versed in dark magic and it’s ill-effects now. He barely saved his mate and his kingdom from it.”

  Hildy saw Chuck and Charlie come out onto the porch. Carol turned and her eyes lit with interest. “My, my. There’s nothing more appealing than a set of shifter twins who look as good as those two.”

  “Down, girl,” Hildy ordered. “They’re two of a set of three, but Chuck’s officially mine, and the one with him is the father of Isobelle’s cubs. Have some couth. You don’t want to follow the wicked witch. ”

  “Goddess, no, I don’t want to follow that skank. Wait… there’s a third one? Is he mated? That would make two of them still technically available. I promise I won’t keep them long,” Carol whispered.

  “Stop,” Hildy said, rolling her eyes. “Chas is mated to a polar bear. She’d probably maul you for looking at him.”

  A naked George chose that moment to limp back into the bloody yard now filled with gross rodent parts everywhere. He didn’t pause as he moved slowly by.

  “Think I tore a calf muscle in whatever animal bottom I was sportin’. It took everything I had left to change back. If it’s all the same to you, Ms. Shifter Whisper, I’m gonna head to the basement and wait until you get done here.”

  Hildy nodded. “Be there as soon as I can, George. You can let the bear cubs out their cage now.” They both watched a naked George carefully climb the steps of the porch.

  “He has quite a nice ass. What is he?” Carol asked. “I can’t get a reading.”

  “George is a mountain lion. Like the others, his shifting is messed up. I’m surprised he was able to change back to human. I’ve had to help the worst of those suffering from the problem.”

  Chuck came out and glared at the frozen Isobelle. “I remember her. She’s the woman who chained me to the tree the day of the Baba Yaga test—her and that dragon guy.”

  “Nothing wrong with that summary,” Hildy confirmed, smiling at the bear she adored.

  Charlie walked slower toward them and sighed as he looked at Isobelle. “That’s her. That’s my Issy. What in the world did I ever see in her?”

  “Only what she spelled you to see,” Carol said firmly. She looked at the agonized bear. “Don’t let what she did ruin your life. Isobelle doesn’t deserve to have that power over you or your children.”

  Charlie didn’t answer because there was suddenly a loud buzzing above their heads. It sounded like a hundred bees descending on them. The bears instinctively fell to the ground and covered their heads.

  Carol laughed. “Guys, it’s okay. It’s not bees. It’s just fairies.”

  Two regal crown-wearing fairies dressed all in purple landed next to them and grew to full height. Behind the royal couple, an entire fairy army appeared with strange weapons clasped in their hands.

  Hildy reached down and pulled Chuck to his feet. Her bear might as well gawk standing up.

  “King Nathaniel,” Carol said formally, smirking as she bowed her head.

  “Stop with the king stuff,” Nathaniel ordered. “I’m practically your uncle.”

  Hildy giggled. “Let’s not say uncle. Carol and I used to make bets with each other about how hot you were under your brown warlock robe. The Jezibaba used to get after us.”

  Hildy and Carol laughed when Nathaniel’s face turned pink.

  “Have you met my queen?” Nathaniel asked.

  Leelu came forward and bowed her head. “Trust me, ladies. He’s even better under his clothes than you probably imagined.”

  “Leelu, don’t encourage them. They’re pranksters,” Nathaniel said.

  Carol and Hildy laughed full out and both put a hand on Nathaniel’s arm.

  “Sorry,” Carol said. “We’re just happy to see you looking so… happy.”

  When Nathaniel turned his head, they both winked at Leelu who looked down to hide her smile.

  “What can we do to help—we can’t stay long,” Nathaniel said as he gestured toward Isobelle’s frozen form. “That witch is full of dark magic. It’s already cost her some of her human life. What has she done to deserve her fate today?”

  “Daddy!” The kids came running down the steps and Chuck ran back trying to stop them.

  Charlie was two footfalls behind Chuck, but both bear fathers were too late to block out the sight. The cubs had already spied the frozen form of Isobelle.

  “Wow,” Farley said. “It’s her, Harrison. Just like you said.”

  “Her? What her?” Chuck asked.

  Harrison nodded and pointed. “She visited us—now and again. She gave us birthday treats last time we saw her and the next day we grew pig snouts. We didn’t tell you because we didn’t want you to worry. She was mostly nice until that last time.”

  “Is she our mother?” Garrison asked.

  “Why? Did she tell you that?” a stunned Charlie choked out.

  Three identical nods brought reality into sharp focus for all the adults. Isobelle could have done anything to the cubs and no one would ever have known.

  Chuck looked at Hildy. She could tell he had no idea what to do. Hildy smiled back at him. “Tell them the truth, Chuck. The cubs need to know. The choice of what to do about it will always be theirs. Nature works like that.”

  “Okay,” Chuck answered, kneeling to be on their level. “The answer to your question is—yes. She’s your birth mother.”

  “But she’s not a good person,” Charlie added, kneeling too. “That woman tricked…” He stopped and rubbed his nose.

  Chuck swallowed hard. He looked at his sons and did what was right. “Her name is Isobelle and she had you three with Charlie. There was a mix-up when she sent you here and I got you instead. I’m still your father and will always be your father, but Charlie is your father too. I know it’s complicated.”

  “Not really,” Harrison said, patting his father’s worried face. “You’re saying that at a molecular level it was Charlie’s DNA contribution that created us. I already told Garrison and Farley that I thought Charley was our actual father. It was the pig snout. You didn’t have one and Charlie did—until Hildy fixed him.” Harrison looked at Isobelle. “Looks like Hildy gave it to our evil mother instead.”

  “Were they ever kids at all?” Charlie asked his brother.

  “Not really,” Chuck supplied with a sigh. “Picking the right colleges for them is going to be hell.”

  One of the cubs cleared his throat. “We don’t have to go live with her, do we?”

  “Go live with who, Farley?” Chuck asked.

  Farley put a hand on his father’s shoulder. “We
want to live with Hildy and eat honey muffins. We want her to be our mother. We don’t want to go with the frozen lady. She wanted us to turn into pigs instead of bears. That’s not right, Dad.”

  “Well, you see…” Chuck stopped and scratched his head.

  Garrison crossed his arms. “You kept the basket we came in, Dad, and we saw the note. We know she gave us away and that you took us in.”

  “Don’t I get a vote? I’d love to be your mother,” Hildy called out to interject herself into the conversation. She smiled at her shocked friends and whispered “excuse me” as she walked through them to get to the kids. “Gaia knows, I’ll never be a normal parent because I’m a Shifter Whisperer, but I can promise to love you and make honey muffins now and again.”

  Harrison shrugged. “I’ve taken a lot of notes in the last year. What would you consider normal in this town, Hildy?”

  Hildy laughed at the little Einstein bear. “Absolutely nothing and no one, Harrison,” she answered honestly.

  Then Hildy stooped to the ground and held out her arms. The three cubs ran into them.

  “Who knows?” she said as she kissed their chubby cheeks. “Maybe if Charlie gets busy soon, you three might end up with two mothers as well as two fathers. Doesn’t that sound like fun?”

  “I know—we can help,” Farley said with real excitement. “We can find the perfect person for him. Garrison has done some calculations—whatever those are.”

  Hildy laughed when Charlie ran a nervous hand through his hair. “Perfect,” she answered, standing back up. “Now let me get back to business. I still have some work to do out here. You guys stay with your dads until I finish.”

  “I love you more than life, Shifter Whisperer. What can our family do to help you?” Chuck asked, climbing to his feet.

  Hildy giggled. “Find me a giant bag of catnip and check on George. Maybe your mother can bake some honey muffins. I’m probably going to need some comfort food when this is all over.”